What do you struggle with most?

[upgradereality]

Hello!
I'm just doing some research because I'm in the mood for creating an ebook/guide to solve a common problem people struggle with in the personal development area.

I'd love any feedback. What is your biggest problem, what's holding you back from being happy or from going after your goals?

Procrastination? Low self esteem? Limiting Beliefs? Confidence issues?

[faithsdaddy]

Procrastination.

[Smarky]

Hey Diggy, I read your blog.

My problem is always the same, seem to go round in circles and have the same issues, but I don't know what causes it or what to do about it.

I overthink things a lot, I don't know what to do, I am obsessed with wanting to become a person that matters, I want to be someone awesome, but I don't know how to be that and I think all the time about how to do it, what I need to do, how I need to be, what I need to think about, it drives me crazy. I tend to be stuck and confused a lot.

I tend to have a lot of different information and see both choices to much and can't make decisions, i've been told by partners that i think and look into everything to much and it drives them crazy.

[Slightedge]

confidence issues..

[GoingUnder]

Good question. Makes you think.

Apathy came to mind first.
And then a fear of disappointment.

[upgradereality]

@smarky - I know what you mean, thanks for sharing that.It seems to me that you have desires but are unable to take action to get started. maybe it's because you don't know where to get started, but it could also be a deeper thing where you are scared of failing, and that by not taking action you can 'prevent' failing because you'll never take a risk.

@slightedge - Could you expand on what you mean by confidence issues? In what area do you stuggle with confidence issues?

@goinunder - Thanks for sharing. Fear of disappointment or fear of failure?

[GoingUnder]

Originally Posted by upgradereality

Fear of disappointment or fear of failure?

Disappointment.

I tend to have this trait of jumping in at the deep end with anything new and exciting. It could be a childlike quality - that's probably a really nice way of putting it. At its worst, it's naivety and gullibility, I guess. (And I'm no spring chicken.)

As a child, I took what my parents told me literally. They wrapped me in cotton wool and protected me from much of what was 'out there'. I was brought up in a loving environment which I'm hugely grateful for (albeit a born-again Christian one - which I'm not hugely grateful for).

When I 'grew up' (I'm still doing that - even in my 40s!) I realised that life wasn't quite how it was portrayed when I was young. I became disappointed, disillusioned and felt somewhat tricked.

I suppose there's an aspect of me who is still Peter Pan and would rather live in the safety of my imagination (which is unlimited and therefore doesn't disappoint) as opposed to living in the real world and looking for the ultimate and being disappointed when it doesn't live up to what I deem the ultimate.

Hee hee. Does that make sense?

[Helesinine]

Fear of being criticized and judged.

[Verlan]

Overcommitting - trying to do too much at once.

[BillyTheAdult]

Meeting new people/making new friends especially in regards to dating. I've dedicated myself since last year to overcoming my problems and have made good progress in all areas but this one.

[Slightedge]

Originally Posted by upgradereality

@slightedge - Could you expand on what you mean by confidence issues? In what area do you stuggle with confidence issues?

I have issues handling and talking to people who have stronger personalities(who are direct, very sharp, smart, tough and very confident themselves).. Basically the executive top type people l.o.l. Basically they intimidate me.

I have no problems with the others(the caring ones, loving, passive, etc).

[AshNZ]

Family issues. I try to take control of as much as I possibly can but tend to fall short every once in a while.

[AshNZ]

Originally Posted by Slightedge

I have issues handling and talking to people who have stronger personalities(who are direct, very sharp, smart, tough and very confident themselves).. Basically the executive top type people l.o.l. Basically they intimidate me.

I have no problems with the others(the caring ones, loving, passive, etc).

Happens with me too at the job. Mainly because I'm a summer intern and others have 5+ years of experience. Is this the case with you too??

[upgradereality]

@goinunder - Yes I understand what you're saying. My suggestion to overcome that is to learn to have minimal expectations. When you place no importance on a certain outcome, you can't be disappointed either.

Thanks for sharing, this is good information for me that I could use in a future project

[Smarky]

Originally Posted by upgradereality

@smarky - I know what you mean, thanks for sharing that.It seems to me that you have desires but are unable to take action to get started. maybe it's because you don't know where to get started, but it could also be a deeper thing where you are scared of failing, and that by not taking action you can 'prevent' failing because you'll never take a risk.

Yes, I think there is a lot of deeper stuff going on, i tend to favour being comfortable and don't like putting myself out there and taking the risk, i think that stops me from taking action and keeps me in the 'figuring it out' stage. Whatever I figure out, i'm generally not confident enough in it to just run with it, i never believe that it's a good enough answer to get me to where I want to be, so i keep thinking, thinking, thinking.

[Slightedge]

Originally Posted by AshNZ

Happens with me too at the job. Mainly because I'm a summer intern and others have 5+ years of experience. Is this the case with you too??

I don't know why though.. But sometimes yes..

[aoifee]

I'd say the biggest problem in general is procrastination. My biggest problem is trying to gain the social skills to make new friends and create the ideal social life. It's the one area where I can't seem to make much headway.