End of the 5 Year plan....

[pollycupcake]

I wrote my very first 5 Year Plan to cover 2006-2010. Sure enough, those five years were the most successful, productive years of my whole life. I made a lot of progress, had a lot of success and the final year (this year), saw many of my long-term efforts come in to fruition. I achieved 3 of my major lifetime goals in the space of 6 months.

So now, of course, it's time to write another one. Except everything is different this time. I wrote the first one as a teenager with a boundless imagination, a whole stack of teenage/childhood dreams to fufill and an attitude of relentless, unbridled ambition.

But now I'm older, I feel more fufilled. I'm proud of what I've ALREADY achieved and, though I am still ambitious, I'm also very satisfied and contented with what I've got at the moment.

I learnt the hard way what relentless ambition can wreck serious havoc on your relationships and health (two areas in my life that are DEFINITELY in for improvement during this 5 year cycle) - burnout, exhaustion, a string of hospitalisations for various stress-exacerbated issues...I did it all, unfortunately. For this reason, I'm proceeding with a little caution.

I'm out of ideas of what to achieve next (I have a few, but not as much as last time) and I don't want to destroy my health any further by pushing all my limits like I did last time. Success is also my drug, and my tolerance is extremely high. In the early days of my plan, I got such a buzz from my achievements, feeling so greatI did well. Eventually, I started to live for that buzz. I was addicted to success, always waiting for that next source of achievement. But the more I achieved, the harder the buzz got to achieve until it became near impossible. For example, I got an award in a competition the other day (just a small one, but even so), and I quite literally just yawned. I wasn't tired, or in a bad mood, it just didn't give me a thrill. It was no where near enough.


So what advice would you give me for my next five year plan? I want to get that thrill and drive back! At first, I thought I might have been depressed or something, but I'm not constantly sad and still function as always, no problems with sleep/appetite/tearfulness of whatever, just in case this was the problem. Got it checked with a doctor, and he says I don't have it. I really do think it's just success burnout. What should I do?

[JHL]

Your post reminds me of that old quote about reaching the top of the ladder of success, only to find it had been leaning against the wrong wall.

It sounds like as you've grown up you've discovered that what you previously thought was important, turned out to be not so important after all.

"Success burnout" : isn't that a contradiction in terms? Does that not imply that something has been significantly out of balance?

The question is - assuming you're trying to avoid achievement for achievements sake (and its attending consequences to your health and well being) - what is really important to you now?