| |||||||
| Personal Effectiveness Goals, productivity, time management, motivation, self-discipline, overcoming procrastination, habits, organizing, problem-solving, decision-making, intelligence |
 |
| | Thread Tools | Display Modes |
10-18-2010, 01:00 AM
| #1 (permalink) |
| Family Member Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 3,853
  |  When does PD end?
I've been thinking about this more and more lately. There will come a point in time where I no longer want to pay attention to my personal development. When I started on this journey, there were certain things I was after. Financial stability, confidence, achieve the goals I set... As of now, I've achieved my financial stability, I've achieved my confidence and I think I may be getting close to consistently achieving my goals. I'm actually thinking that soon I won't be reading PD material anymore. I'll still hang around as this is a major social outlet for me. I mentioned this quote on a different thread, "don't keep trying to achieve your goal once you've achieved it". My personal development goals are nearly met. So the way I see it, I have a few options: 1. Start uncovering as many limited beliefs as possible and deal with them. 2. Put it on autopilot and pursue new interests. This means just keep doing what I'm doing (setting goals and the like) but don't actively read PD material. 3. Create uninspired PD goals just because. I find myself searching around on the forums for where to go next. I thought about trying vegetarian, I kicked around the idea of using an SR lens, I considered doing some gremlin hunting, I thought about picking up a bunch of PD books. It all feels so... forced. Like I'm doing it because it's what other people are doing. For that reason, I'm opting for #2 on my list. To me, personal development is a skill set. Once you've acquired the skills and learned how to use them, there isn't much else to learn. You just use those skills to achieve what you want. Since I've nearly acquired the skills I've come for, where else is there to go? It almost feels like graduating from college. There's a big world out there and there's a brand-new me. So could you see the world of personal development having a definitive end? A point where there really isn't anything else to learn? I realize that picking up a math textbook and doing some equations could be considered PD. I'm talking about reading the PD material, attending the seminars and listening to the audio. IMO, it's the same messages packaged in fresh metaphors. Same ****, different day  Thoughts? |
|      |
|
10-18-2010, 01:08 AM
| #3 (permalink) | |
| Family Member Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 3,853
| Quote:
You can always attain perfection by lowering the bar. If you are perfectly satisfied with who you are, why bother developing? | |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 01:09 AM
| #4 (permalink) |
| Banned Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posts: 12,751
|
Interesting thread Mounds. For me, my PD started around 15 years ago, and I felt like I've done most of all the things I wanted to explore. It's funny that I found this site actually, since I wasn't consciously looking to start up PD again. Apparently I needed to? I think it's definately something you need to know when has run it's course. People get hooked on PD, which can just be replacing one obsession/addiction with another. Then again, some of the tools you can acquire in the time spent in PD are forever, so in a sense, developing as a person will continue, I just think things go around in cycles and phases, like lots of things in Life. Not losing the focus of why you started in the first place, is important I think...otherwise it can become just about acquiring as many tools and courses and books as possible, which can often have the effect of going the opposite direction. Once you reach your objectives though, and are better equiped to deal with change, then the search for help and looking outside yourself, becomes moot. Maybe that's a long-winded version of saying that yes, I think PD can run it's course, and life goes on...there is life after PD |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 01:13 AM
| #5 (permalink) |
| Family Member Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 3,703
|
At some point, it all becomes personal development. Everything you do becomes an inquiry. I want to play guitar well, I must apply every aspect of my being to it. Including things I learned while doing PD. I want to travel, well traveling well pretty much involves all that Zen stuff and living in the moment.
|
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 02:01 AM
| #7 (permalink) |
| Retired Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: A Greyhound Station where I set my thoughts to far off destinations...
Posts: 4,380
|
I'm doing number 2 atm myself But I don't think that necessarily is "un-PD". You've made a conscious assessment of what you want and you're not afraid to do. How PD is that, man? Although for some reason #1 stuck in out despite the other "forced" PD goals you mentioned earlier. Is there a reason for that? |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 02:05 AM
| #8 (permalink) | |
| Family Member Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Funny location joke
Posts: 2,056
| Quote:
| |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 03:01 AM
| #9 (permalink) |
| Banned Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: The Flames Which Temper Steel
Posts: 2,017
|
It never really stops. It may not be the primary focus but human beings by nature are dynamic; once you begin consciously evolving you will continue to do so even if by pure inertia. This is assuming that old patterns aren't allowed to take hold and drag you back to where you were. If that happens much that should be intolerable can be withstood whereas an evolving person will hit a new wall and, because of prior developments, they won't be able to stand it for long. I think it works in cycles. There are times when gremlin hunting is very profitable but there comes a point where you get diminishing returns. In the worst case scenario you invent problems just so you can solve them. Likewise, there are points where you can take what you've learned and from then it's pretty smooth sailing until you hit a bump in the road. You're faced with a challenge your existing toolset is ill-equipped to handle so you start gremlin hunting again. While I can't comment from firsthand experience, it appears some people reach a plateau where they're so good at getting results nothing is really going to happen that can shake them up. They can still go further but the only way is for them to consciously initiate it. It echoes back to the start of PD as there's no way to take the first step without consciously making a choice. So the long and short of it is do what you feel is best. Each person is their own compass. But keep up the personal exploration; PD isn't about what you read, it's an investment in you. That's lifelong and if it ever stops you're selling yourself short. |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 03:18 AM
| #10 (permalink) |
| Banned Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 12,690
|
I take a very Yoda/Force like view of personal development. That is, it's everywhere...in everything...at all times in all places. It surrounds us and binds us and it rips us apart only to teach us how to come back together again. Some of my most inspiring moments in personal development involve things that have little to do with the general goal-setting/achieve results kind of stuff that is prominent within personal devlopment. For example, one of the best personal development books I know of is a novel by Wally Lamb that has nothing to do with personal development. I grew so much just reading that book. (It's called I Know This Much is True). One of my defining moments in personal development was when I stood over a lake and threw my cigarettes into the water and watched them float away. I bought another pack like 5 hours later (so it's not like I "achieved" anything in that moment by mainstream PD standards), but I look back on the moment and that time as one of those moments I first felt a shift in me. The next apex of my personal development was a trip to Seattle...traveling 3000 milles away by myself, making it all come together for a weekend of sex, drinking, and sight-seeing. Today I had a similar shift...a similar moment...as I did that day a few years ago over that lake. I was standing on my porch and I looked out at the field and the trees and the deer and I was struck by the absolute harmony of it all. To me it never ends, and it exists in all things...it's the constant and never-ending exploration of self as experienced through others. And it all moves at exactly the right pace, at exactly the right time, in perfect (and sometimes destructive) harmony. When I kiss my kids on the cheek or I'm writing, it doesn't matter. |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 04:41 AM
| #11 (permalink) | |
| Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Hawaii
Posts: 653
| Quote:
That's far different from studiously reading, listening to and involving yourself in capital letters Personal Development. I think that a few core concepts or approaches at a time might be enough for most people. This isn't a subject with the breadth and depth of Shakespeare, after all, and once you've found something that causes a seismic shift I can't see the point of continually circling the same rut. Move on. Come back to it the next time you need a kick in the ass. Move on. Repeat as needed. | |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 07:54 AM
| #13 (permalink) |
| Member Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: Bucharest, Romania
Posts: 69
|
I'm pretty sure that for me, all efforts to improve myself will have ended once I will come to know "Who I am". Basically, once I will no longer exist as an ego, there will be nobody here to talk about (improving), and I will just live and enjoy everything, doing anything. However, from a practical point of view, even then there will be something to do, to improve, to discover, but it will only be a game, like growing your character in an RPG game, it will have nothing to do with effort. But it could very well prove to be no different than what I'm going now, so in answer to your question, I don't think PD ever ends unless you want it to. Also, some people chose to pursue their spiritual development (if there is such a thing), in which case there is always something to do, a higher state of awareness to go to, a way to raise your vibration or energy, or learn how to help others if that's what one wants. Endless possibilities. |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 12:09 PM
| #14 (permalink) |
| Family Member Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 3,853
|
Sound familiar? The PD Plan 1. Read PD books. 2. Take Photoreading course to read PD books faster 3. Discover RSS feed and fill with PD blogs 4. Read tremendous amounts of content, absorb 10% 5. PD authors offer products, buy them to become "better at life" 6. Not good enough! Hire coach to get "better at life" 7. Have become PD expert, start PD blog and monetize 8. No one reading blog. Need to read more PD material to offer fresh perspective 9. Still no one reading blog! Buy PD products focusing on blogging and making money online. 10. Let blog die. Find lots of new problems with self. Broke, carnivorous, shy, virgin. MORE PD PRODUCTS!!!1!!111! 11. Die of old age. Tombstone reads, "Had a passion for personal development. Too bad he never did anything with it". Man I love tongue-in-cheek posts. |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 12:55 PM
| #16 (permalink) | |
| Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 158
| Quote:
You will never know everything. It's impossible in one lifetime. If you want to stay vital and engaged in life, you will continue to develop. If you do not, you will wither away. To not pay attention to, or consciously direct it, does not mean that personal development is not going on. | |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 02:41 PM
| #18 (permalink) |
| Family Member Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 3,853
|
Just so ya know, I'm treating personal development as a subject, not a lifestyle. I can call anything personal development from cooking a new dish to learning to ride a motorcycle to reading a book about quantum physics. I'm talking quite literally about the subject of personal development. The lifestyle of personal development will end with the burial of my beautiful corpse. |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 02:45 PM
| #19 (permalink) | |
| Banned Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 12,690
| Quote:
| |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 03:02 PM
| #21 (permalink) |
| Family Member Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 3,853
|
Heh, all eyes on me  I consider the subject of personal development to be a tool, not unlike a Swiss Army knife. As you go through the different facets of PD, you add attachemnets or certain attachments become more efficient. You might add the following to your knife: -personal finance -time management -social skills -confidence -efficient goal setting The Swiss Army knife is just a tool to make your life better. It is not your life. I consider the lifestyle of personal development to be a bit different. That sort of lifestyle entails that you'll always be learning, trying new things and improving. The tools you've gained by absorbing this material will forever come in handy but they themselves are a goal that can be accomplished. That chapter of my life is coming to a close. Although I'm not finished learning and developing, I have all the tools I wanted. Time to move on |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 03:15 PM
| #22 (permalink) | |
| Family Member Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: where don't I live?
Posts: 4,412
| Quote:
| |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 03:31 PM
| #23 (permalink) | |
| Banned Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 22,520
| Quote:
| |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 03:46 PM
| #25 (permalink) |
| Legendary Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Where Living and Loving and Laughing are written into the Constitution
Posts: 14,240
|
Maybe I would say that I would like to live and and not just learn how to do it all the time and never have time to experience it. Did anybody get this?  I felt like Mounds a few times in my life when I was trying to find the new thing I should do or change in order to grow instead of just living and growing along the way. It's like the old saying "those who can't teach" in our case it would be "those who can't learn all the time so they don't have time to do". Last edited by marinik; 10-18-2010 at 03:48 PM. |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 04:00 PM
| #26 (permalink) | |
| Family Member Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 2,011
| Quote:
| |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 05:06 PM
| #27 (permalink) |
| Banned Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 3,001
|
Does PD ever stop? Not really. Does grass ever decide, "Meh... okay, I think I'm done growing now." No - not unless it's dying. There may come a time where you don't consciously think about "personal development", but hopefully it continues. It is very possible to unconsciously personally development, perhaps even better than most people do it consciously. If you find yourself worrying or feeling disappointed in not reaching some PD goal, this isn't a problem with PD. It's a problem with your approach to PD. Don't feel disappointed. I have grown past the point of most books and courses (lol - I almost wrote "curses") too. They're the beginning-to-intermediate point of PD. The rest comes from experience and personal insight. But PD never stops. To sum it up: I love me more today than yesterday. But not, as much, as tomorroooooow. |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 05:32 PM
| #29 (permalink) | |
| Family Member Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 3,853
| Marinik wins the prize Quote:
| |
|
| |
|
10-18-2010, 06:21 PM
| #30 (permalink) |
| Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: Vancouver, BC
Posts: 76
| Follow your whims...
What if you just read a book or took up a hobby etc. because it sounded intriguing, provoked your curiousity, or you were drawn to it? At times I find I'll pick up a PD book because I think I should vs wow - that's sounds interesting! Like James81 alluded to - we can learn about ourselves without reading about PD. For instance, if we react to something someone says or does, explore that. Don't make yourself wrong for reacting that way, just be curious as to why you reacted that way. As with running or strength training, perhaps we reach plateaus in PD as well. Perhaps it's time to just enjoy where you are and not worry about moving forward. |
|
| |
|
| Bookmarks |
« Previous Thread
|
Next Thread »
| Thread Tools | |
| Display Modes | |
Linear Mode
| |
All times are GMT. The time now is 02:19 AM.