My Awesome Goals

[butterflyeffect]

Lol I feel like Im going off an a huge ego trip but anyway...

My broad over arching values are to help people, bond with others, be healthy and content and at peace doing something I love.

Now, within that framework, here are my goals that inspire me to action.

Creative Career in Fashion and Media as a top fashion photographer and creative director.
I love fashion, media and advertising. I spend hours sketching fashion images. Creating my own and tracking the careers of models both commercial and fashion.

So I want to find my place within the industry. Broad goal is to become a well respected Creative Director and Fashion photographer and Modelling Agent.

Short term goals:
I want to complete an 8 week make up course in fashion make up for Camera. Then I can start building up my portfolio. I want to understand all aspects of the business.

Start an art and drawing class to further develop my drawing skills. And do life drawing and fashion drawing classes.

Get into sales and promotional modelling for high class fashion events. That way I can meet lots of people, promote and sell products I love and network. Can't wait.




Challenges:
I need to stop being a people pleasing pansy. I'm smart, creative and outgoing. So I am observing and writing down the ways in which I people please. Its an automatic thing I do and I want to make it a choice, so I can choose rather than being an automatic suck up.

[butterflyeffect]

The next big question I'm struggling with is modelling. I have always thought I wanted to be a model but now I'm not sure. In fact sometimes i feel bored with the idea, I want to be behind the camera instead. That scares me. Have to work through that.

As part of being a high profile fashion photographer I will get to travel the world and meet lots of new people. I will get to work with top models I admire. I would get to create and shoot the advertisments and editorials I love.

Alternatively, I could be a creative director. Creating the vision and carrying it through. I would get to boss everyone around and create beautiful pictures.

Importantly, the goals are an experience not a destination. Life won't stop once I get there. I am going to enjoy learning and building my dream career every step of the way.

I am starting a make up course in October. I will be learning fashion make up for photography. After that I plan to take a basic photography course.

As for my eating disorder, originally the goal was get better, but now I'm less concerned with it. I am much more interested in my new life and that will gradually fade away. So I will continue to go to my therapists and work through the issues but remain focused on the long term direction.

[ssandra]

Sounds awesome!!

I think for now, you don't have to choose yet what you will do. Photography or Director. You'll have plenty of time to do a bit of both and then decide from experience which you like best.

I'm very excited for you!!

[Caria]

That really does sounds really awesome...
You sound really positive, and that is really good!

Keep updates how it goes.

[butterflyeffect]

Thank you for all the encouragement!!!

I am feeling really positive about this journey. Just thinking about my goals makes me feel enthusiastic and energised. Interestingly even my heart rate increases just thinking about it.

I am in the process of finding a good basic photography course. I want to learn the basic skills first and take it from there. I don't feel rushed. I have a life time of quality learning ahead of me.

Current Role Model
One of my role models and sources of inspiration is petite model Erin Wagner.
She was a contestant and runner up on the Petite Cycle of America's Next Top Model. I admire Erin because she is still pursuing modelling sucessfully after the show finished, she performs effortlessly and puts in alot of work and is comes across as a strong and determined individual.

Creating Space
Now I just feel that I need to create the space for my intentions to manifest. I have noticed I have to much clutter in my life at the moment.

So I am going to re organise my room. Clear out all the draws and the bookshelves. Make sure that I have a system that is organised and low maintenance.

I have lost interest in my eating disorder, I have lost any desire to engage with it. I just notice it and keep on going. My goals are too exciting.

I am going to need to start teaching myself how to self structure. I struggle with feeling overwhelmed by mess and unfilled spaces of time. So I am going to start writing a to do list the night before and planning my time in advance. That way I will feel less overwhelmed and actually progress steadily.


Things I'm working on
- Planning out my time
- Using a diary
- Cleaning my room
- Finding a good basic photography course
- Booking into and attending a weekly drawing class
- Getting my license

[butterflyeffect]

Well still clearing out all the clutter in my room. It feels never ending. I keep clearing out lots of rubbish. But on the plus side, I am definately less inclined to buy things. I have become far choosier and aware of what I actually like. Throwing out lots of things will do that for you!!

I need to become more goal oriented. I have been observing that my anxiety and obsessions and people pleasing all take me further away from goals. In a sentence..

Resisting my obsessions hurts now. Following them hurts ten fold more.

I am still observing my people pleasing behaviors and just making gradual modifications to my behavior. I haven't been able to change radically overnight but I am making some definate progress. By dealing with these other issues as they arise I will be able to achieve the end goal otherwise I just lost in the middle.

[stacystalon]

Make an Awesome list of your Goals and make yourself you’ll be able to achieve all those things. This definitely inspires you to compile your list too.
Make a massive impact in the lives of 10+ friends!

Good luck...