trusting God trusting people

[Mynder]

Your bitterness makes you blind to the frame of mind that would allow you to cope better. you are afraid that this demon will rear its head around every corner now. I cannot replace the trust you lost for you. And nobody here can help you as long as you keep all the doors closed.

What are you looking for? Someone to fight your legal fight for you, or to reaffirm your current conviction that no one can be trusted? If you can look past your bitterness and disappointment just for one moment and consider where that is going to take you, and what kind of life it would mean you would have to live, I am sure you will conclude that that is not a way to lead a happy life.

Not everything and everyone out there is all good and shiny. Some people will screw you over any chance they get. Does that suddenly make all people bad?

Do all people need to adhere to the same code of conduct as you (video tape copying)? There are laws in about every country in the world that my personal ethics would consider amoral and detrimental for human evolution as a society. Should I give up my personal values because of this?

I simply accept my responsibility for my choices, and when I break the law, I accept that there may be consequences.

Not everybody does, and not everybody cares enough for other people to consider the consequences their actions may have on them. This is what happened to you, and what you took from this is that you should throw the baby out with the bathwater, and that it is somehow our fault that we do not agree with this assessment.

I understand both your anger and bitterness, compounded by the financial catastrophe this is for you. I hope that you are able to clear your name of the charges brought up against you, and that then you will find a way to regain some amount of trust in humanity.

[keepitreal]

I think no one owes me anything, but I was a fool to think I can count on anyone to do the right thing. I do not expect help from anyone, but I have heard all this garbage about the right people come into your life at the right time and things work out for the best. I t is a lie in my case. I offer this because I would not have lost my will to find joy in life if I had been aware that it would not work out and anyone who might read this will not make my same mistake. What I have seen are alot of people who admit that they got lucky with not being caught doing things they should have gotten punished for like Steve Pavlina. Thanks for your input, but like I have stated before, this positive thinking attitude does not work or I would have gotten better results, and lets not forget about the woman I wrote about who lies and cheats on her husband but is rewarded with a thriving business for her actions.

[James81]

Originally Posted by keepitreal

I think no one owes me anything, but I was a fool to think I can count on anyone to do the right thing. I do not expect help from anyone, but I have heard all this garbage about the right people come into your life at the right time and things work out for the best. I t is a lie in my case. I offer this because I would not have lost my will to find joy in life if I had been aware that it would not work out and anyone who might read this will not make my same mistake. What I have seen are alot of people who admit that they got lucky with not being caught doing things they should have gotten punished for like Steve Pavlina. Thanks for your input, but like I have stated before, this positive thinking attitude does not work or I would have gotten better results, and lets not forget about the woman I wrote about who lies and cheats on her husband but is rewarded with a thriving business for her actions.

So, you see others getting rewarded for their bad behavior and you feel like you are being punished...or at the very least you feel like you deserve a reward because you try to do the right thing?

[Mynder]

Well, only you can decide how you want to live your life. If you think lying and cheating is preferable, because "it is rewarded", then have fun.

I'll go by the positive thinking attitude, and for every time I get ****ed over there will be half a dozen friends I pick up alongside the road. No, positive thinking will not stop somebody from lying to me. Nor will it stop that bully from beating me up should I ever get into that situation. But it'll give me way better odds of getting out of there intact, or even actually in a good way, than just saying "all people suck".

You have had one very bad experience, and conclude that "this just doesn't work, or I would have gotten different results". Well, sorry to wake you up, but all you get is better odds at getting good results. The reverse is also true.

If you **** people over all the time, you're bound to have your ass handed to you as well sooner or later. The air gets thin at the top, and there are bound to be bigger fish than you on average.

The world doesn't adhere to your understanding of fairness, and not to mine, either. You can take that as grounds for only focussing on the crap that goes on, or blow off your steam and get back to a place where you can work towards something that means something to you. Your call, your choice, your responsibility.

If all you want to do here is tell us we're all idiots because we believe what you consider "crap", then you're free to be elsewhere.

If there is a reason for you to be here, you might try a different approach than busting everyone who spares a few kind words for you in sympathy.

I bet there are at least two or three people on here who have been ****ed over just as bad as you have, and recovered from that somehow. If you can quit the "**** it all" attitude about the folks around here just for a moment, you might even get an understanding response from them.

So you could ask whether anyone has experienced something similar, and ask about how they got through it, and whether they have any suggestions for you. But as long as you don't want to hear the answers, all this is not going to help you.

[keepitreal]

You know I do not expect anything from anyone any longer, This was not your run of the mill getting screwed over situation. It reminded me of "to kill a Mockingbird " by Harper Lee and "The Shawshank redemption" but without the redemption. I have gotten over bad experiences in life as anyone can, but to put faith in something which does not work when you are facing unfathomable odds was what happened to me.
My point is that having a positive attitude and affirmations do not work when you are facing an organization that will not let you win or even play fair. So forget my bitterness and etc. You have lots of people who tell you how they overcame enormous odds etc. My demise occurred because I thought that God or Higher Power or whatever you may want to call it would be there to help me get justice and it did not happen.
It is important to bring this story to light because if I had read about someone like me I would have reacted differently to my situation. I got what I got because I trusted and my message is that I cannot trust others and I should have realized that.
I see way too many people getting preyed upon to get involved in self help and spending money on things that do not work, so I do feel vindicated releasing my anger in this forum and appreciate the ability to do so.
So if there is someone who has had as devastating experience which was:
Accused of something I did not do
Gave the board evidence which they would not allow me to use
had my business closed down
had the board with hold evidence which would have helped me
written up as guilty without being charged or arrested
provided recommendations I should return to practice by 2 experts and gotten nowhere
So if you happen to know anyone who has had a similar or worse experience happen I would like to read about it.
Thanks for you input. Good Luck

[Ecce Homo]

Hello keepitreal. It sounds like your experience was very painful. It also sounds like you are making it, one day at a time. You’re still here.

I just wanted to make a small comment on what you said here:

Originally Posted by keepitreal

My demise occurred because I thought that God or Higher Power or whatever you may want to call it would be there to help me get justice and it did not happen.

It sounds to me like you didn’t actually trust. You didn’t really trust that all is well. You believed instead that everything would work out in a certain way, one that you interpret as positive. It sounds like you equated positive thinking with the belief that everything will work out in exactly the way you want it to, all the time. When reality did not match your expectations, you took that to mean that all positivity, all positive thinking is bunk. Of course, you could be right. Maybe positive thinking IS bunk. Who knows. I’m only going to suggest that another possible interpretation, one that you could consider if you want, is that all is well and that wellness does not always look the way we think it will beforehand. Perhaps it was your definitions and expectations concerning wellness that were wonky. In a contest between what we expect to happen verses what actually happens, between our beliefs about reality verses reality, reality always wins. You probably know that already. It’s just that the emotional pain may be making that hard to see right now, which is perfectly understandable given what you say you have been through.

I haven’t read the entire thread, so it’s a real good chance this has already been suggested. If it has and you have decided it’s bunk then by all means, ignore it.

And good luck to you!!! I hope you experience loads of happiness and joy in the days and weeks to come!

[Orca]

Hi Keepitreal,

Sorry to hear what happened. That sounds quite difficult. There really isn't anything anyone could possibly say to make you feel better...

You know, your situation reminded me of those stories in the news of people who were convicted of crimes they did not commit, and got thrown in prison for decades. Some were lucky enough to eventually win their freedom. Yay for them. But you can imagine the deep anger and disappointment some might feel, of having so many years of their lives taken away from them unjustly...

And yet, at some point, all these people have to face it and find a way to move on. Else, what is their alternative? The bitterness from the unfairness of life could be totally overwhelming. It could wreck their lives.

And I see that this situation has been eating away at you for months, based on the date of your first post. That is too bad. Sorry to hear it.

It is unfortunate but true that bad things do happen to good people sometimes. I know this flies in the face of some of the PD stuff people tell themselves. And it can trigger all kinds of subconscious rage and disappointment, mostly with life. But it sometimes these kinds of setbacks have alot to do with a feeling of how you thought life "should be". In other words, "I was a good person and this absolutely should not have happened to me." Or, "I didn't deserve this. Because I was honest and I should have been rewarded for it." Or, "God betrayed me because I was good and this happened." And many would lose faith in life and themselves.

Life is not fair and things do not always happen the way we think they "should". Sure, we can have ideas in our mind about truth and honesty and noble causes and how life "should be" if we are good people, or if we have "positive beliefs", etc. Bt life does not always put us in charge of everything. Things do not always go according to our well-intentioned plan.

I suppose you could try to fight the city hall or God or other people or the state licensing board to try to make things fair from your perspective. It would certainly be your right to do so. But in this case, you may or may not not win. It would help you to be ok with that....

Meanwhile, Keepitreal, life goes on. At some point, in some way and place in time, maybe today or tomorrow or next week or next month or next year, you'll have to make a decision. Do you want this incident to wreck your entire life and define you as a person? I think not. Life is too short. Don't let this one thing haunt you forever. It has cost you months of heartache already. And it will continue to do so, if you let it. And that outcome has little to do with the board or other people or this wacko patient. It's your response to this incident that ultimately matters, for your own life.

This is a tough situation, and there is little anyone can really say to make you feel better. I can only hope this makes a bit of sense. I really do wish you the best!

Regards,

Orca

[slumberland]

There is injustice all over, and it is up to people to change things and make them better whenever possible. Sometimes we don't have the capacity to do this. Sometimes we do. Look at slavery. Look at child brides and endless other horrors that are going on right now, all the time.

Most of the freedoms we have did not come easy - somebody somewhere in history fought for them. Corrupt regimes were overthrown, creativity and justice flourished - somewhere, somehow. When things are right, it's because people worked hard to make them right.

What happened to you is terrible. It shouldn't have happened.

This law of attraction thing - I think there is some metaphysical truth to it when somebody is in a safety zone to begin with. You can bump into the right person at the right time, synchronicity works, I don't think that has anything to do with corruption. I think that sometimes we may be able to influence reality more than we realize, but only sometimes, and I don't understand it and I'm not an expert.

Have you read When Bad Things Happen to Good People? I think this could be a very good book for you to read. I don't know why I didn't think of it before.

As for Job, I think the fact that God lets Job get basically tortured is incidental to the real message of the story. Which is more about how Job's suffering is misinterpreted by onlookers.

The message is not, hey God makes bets with the devil just to hurt and kill good people to prove a point but rather - don't judge somebody who is suffering, you have no idea what is actually going on behind the scenes.

Remember, Job was written in such a way to speak to people over the course of thousands of years, it is one of the oldest books of the bible so we are going back 5,000 years. And still it is relevant. This is all not really what I had been planning to say but it's better to post it than just stall, glad you are still here checking messages.

[keepitreal]

Thanks slumberland, but I am not referring to JOB, but his servants who were murdered according to the Bible. They were killed for just being at the wrong place and time in all the versions I read. And in response to the individual who thinks I did not trust, why would you assume that position instead of the opposite? That I did trust and it backfired on me. Like trusting a significant other and to come hoe to find they have left you and you had no idea they were unhappy.
When you know the end result you can figure any way to debate something you cannot really prove. You can always say that the reason I things turned out as they did was because I lacked faith in God or whatever because that what everyone else says. It is an easy way out. I keep coming back here and seeing these regurgitated accepted ideas like I did not trust and that's why things went bad for me. Maybe I am being tested. Maybe this is all a dream and I will wake up. Maybe its just life. Maybe its bad Karma coming back on me like all the people in 9-11 had on the same day. Who knows. Thanks for your thoughts.

[Mynder]

I never said you should have just had faith. In my experience, faith alone can sometimes move mountains, but I don't switch off my common sense when dealing with people in favor of just trusting some higher power to make all go smoothly.

Yes, in your case, you might have been too trusting. You may beat yourself up for having been honest, true to your own values. It happens. But this is not about whether you live up to some dogma or code of conduct set down by society. This is about how you can live your life as best you can and look at yourself in the mirror without feeling bad.

Bad things happen. In your case it is bad enough so you don't see a good way to move on from where you are. Maybe this will turn out to be the point where your life declines and you get to become a bitter isolationist, a hermit, trusting no-one, ending up in a sad place for the rest of your life. Maybe this is the point where you find a lever to get yourself back into practicing and gained some wisdom and a healthy dose of doubt and questioning other peoples' motives. Maybe this is the point where your previous career gets shut down for good and forever, and you, through whatever detours you need to heal, find another way of expressing to the world your unique way of help and support (if you weren't the kind of person who likes to help people you wouldn't have chosen a career in the field you did).

If you previously thought the message was "just trust and all will turn out well", then this was a very hard way to teach you that an open heart and naiveté are not the same thing. You can be both "people wise" and open hearted. It is possible you will have, at some point, felt some slight nagging that something wasn't quite right with that client/patient of yours. A sliver of doubt, maybe. Or maybe you didn't. Pay attention to the impressions you get from people. If something bothers you, be wary. If in doubt, make sure you have witnesses or a recording of what actually happened.

If you want to go back through all that has happened for a review, try putting yourself into the shoes of the committee/board members. What appearances did the situation give, and what impression did you make in the way you defended your case? Is there a different approach that might work better?

Did you come across as being hostile, perhaps? Look for things that may have led them to believe there was something to this case. Also, check out precedents. If there has been a long streak of precedents, they may be urged to clamp down hard on this kind of offense.

Again, having faith does not mean you don't need your own brain and common sense, and it also doesn't mean to trust everyone blindly and assume everyone has your best interest at heart. After all you've been through, you already learned this lesson the hard way. But it does not invalidate the original idea of being and thinking positively, because when you judge all things as negative, you will miss out on a lot of possibilities and opportunities and dismiss them as "won't get me anywhere anyway".

You must be very exhausted by the whole matter by now. If you can, take a day or two out in nature, with a nice view and some quiet. Let your surroundings sink in for a bit, and let everything else go...just for the day.

I hope you find something in here that helps you in some way.

[slumberland]

Originally Posted by keepitreal

Thanks slumberland, but I am not referring to JOB, but his servants who were murdered according to the Bible. They were killed for just being at the wrong place and time in all the versions I read.

I should have clarified. I was talking about your mention of Job a few weeks ago, that God really punished Job.

Yes, the servants were in the wrong place at the wrong time, all his children are also killed in the story through no fault of their own. Then he gets new children at the end. I think a lot of people read it for the deeper messages not literally.

[Ecce Homo]

Originally Posted by keepitreal

Thanks for your thoughts.

Your welcome!

I wrote a rather longish response, which I decided to delete. I'm not a huge fan of reading walls of text on online forums, so I try not to write them myself anymore.

After reading more of this thread, it occurs to me that you may be looking for something besides emotional relief and a way to take effective action. If that's the case, I'll just mosey on out and wish you the best!!! Seriously, I wish you the best. Live long and prosper and be happy!

[keepitreal]

Yeah, I get alot of good lucks.

[James81]

Originally Posted by keepitreal

Yeah, I get alot of good lucks.

Rubber baby buggy bumpers.

[XxNatyxX]

Keepitreal,

I certainly understand what you are going through, as i said before in a previous post in this thread i went through a similar situation. I would like to say that things are gradually getting worse for those people who messed with me in my previous job.. I am not celebrating for this.... but like i said ... those people who did you wrong will get theirs... if you really are person and didn't do anything wrong... you will come out ok... i know spending all that money is killer, but... think of it this way... it doesn't matter... as long as you are ok. I have encountered situations in which sometimes i felt like i shouldn't trust anyone. I realized though... that i enjoy being nice to others and i won't let a bad experience change who i am. Right now i'm broke, i lost my house.. and i'm living with my mom... but i know that it won't last forever. I'll definately send out good vibes and put out good intentions.... i know this is probably regurgitated for you... lol... take care

[Rad]

Hey Keepitreal:

I cannot imagine what you are going through right now. I am certain that you must feel confused and betrayed.

Please do not feel like you are alone because you at least have the support of the people in this forum and I am certain that when the truth comes out you will be able to move forward with your life...

Now, I know that this is easier said then done but you have to build nerves of steel and rise up to the challenge of seeing this through with confidence especially since you know where you stand in your innocence.

Keep your mind occupied and I will tell you that best way to this which is what works for me is to write it out on paper. Let your emotions run and put it all down on paper.

It has helped me analyze my own situations, make sense of them, and then determine how to approach them with common sense.

Try it and I hope that it helps.

Please feel free to contact me at: afser92@yahoo.com

[keepitreal]

Rad and Natyxx,
Thanks for your time, Naty I see you have kept up in looking at this thread. I appreciate your insights, and it sucks with your current situation. I guess the reason I have felt compelled to write and bring this out is because I see alot of lying and cheating. I see people upset with the government. Until this happened to me I did not really see why they got resentful at the government. It was something I would not have believed was possible or at the least that I was distorting things. Someone wrote a response recently and asked about the Board trying to protect others etc. I refer you to the thread where i found out about a Dr. who was punished by this same board for marrying a patient of 15 years ( patient for 12 years- then dated for 3 years- then married) and after 7 years of marriage they disciplined him for sexual misconduct with this woman.
This Board uses their position as an authority figure to hold the assumption they are protecting the public. All the lawyers I have contacted in various states have said that the state board will defer to the judgement of the original board. So whoever reads this would get more bang for their buck by just being objective.
I have described the prejudice I witnessed first hand when I lived in Chicago, and I KNOW from speaking to relatives that opinions have not changed much since I left 20 years ago.
Rad- out of over 2200 veiws on this post, you are only the 2nd one who gave an email to contact you for assistance. Thank you. I have been getting other things in line with this situation. I will be in touch this week Namaste