Personal Development for Smart People^TM Forums

PerDev · 12-05-2009, 03:44 AM

How do you Listen
How do you listen effectively?
Have anyone taken formal training on Listening?
Could you please share your experience?

Piercetheveil · 12-05-2009, 04:29 AM

Eye gazing.
Being fully present to all
that is going on with the person.
Their movements. Tone. Pacing.

I ask questions.

"Here is what I hear you saying...is that accurate?"

I encourage with uh huhs....Positive movements.

In short....I make love with their communication. We dance.

newmark · 12-05-2009, 12:16 PM

You don't need 'formal training' for listening. Just listen. You can do this by finding things of interest in the person you are listening to. Even if you think this person is the most boring person in the world, you can remember that they are human and have some things that are valuable in their lives. And if you really think they don't, you can try to understand why not.

If you can learn to discover interesting things in anybody's life, then you will naturally be able to listen to anybody; and gain from the experience.

Strangemagik · 12-08-2009, 08:08 AM

Ah... I think I need formal training. I dont know what is wrong with me but people can be talking and I'm ready to move along. I've been working on trying to hold out and let people finish.

How do you keep your brain slowed down long enough to allow people the time to express themselves?

This is my whole social dilemma right here. I can follow a large group of conversations and still feel like I'm interrupting people or skipping ahead.

escapeplan · 12-08-2009, 08:19 AM

I think Dale Carneige in "How to win friends and influence people" probably nailed the answer and techniques to this question.

Cool Chick · 12-08-2009, 09:43 AM

Listen. With your ears, eyes, heart, soul, nose, toes, prose. Really really listen. Be still. Focus. Breathe in your partner, want to know. Want to be on top of the empathy, loving embrace of “I hear you.”. Lean forward, rapt in the knowledge of the imparting of stories. You’d guffaw at how much people just want to be heard! Your time to talk will come about. Always does. For now … zip the lip and open the earbuds, listen as if life depended on the words of your compadre.

Caring compassion means attention. Practice such and listening will come natural. You should be a little spent after active listening. No barriers. No formal training here except years of listening for a living. People truly just want to be heard.

12-05-2009, 03:44 AM	#1 (permalink)
PerDev Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 591	How do you Listen How do you Listen How do you listen effectively? Have anyone taken formal training on Listening? Could you please share your experience?

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12-05-2009, 04:29 AM	#2 (permalink)
Piercetheveil Family Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 1,070	Eye gazing. Being fully present to all that is going on with the person. Their movements. Tone. Pacing. I ask questions. "Here is what I hear you saying...is that accurate?" I encourage with uh huhs....Positive movements. In short....I make love with their communication. We dance.

12-05-2009, 12:16 PM	#3 (permalink)
newmark Senior Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: Taiwan Posts: 683	You don't need 'formal training' for listening. Just listen. You can do this by finding things of interest in the person you are listening to. Even if you think this person is the most boring person in the world, you can remember that they are human and have some things that are valuable in their lives. And if you really think they don't, you can try to understand why not. If you can learn to discover interesting things in anybody's life, then you will naturally be able to listen to anybody; and gain from the experience.

12-08-2009, 08:08 AM	#4 (permalink)
Strangemagik Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Arizona Posts: 243	Ah... I think I need formal training. I dont know what is wrong with me but people can be talking and I'm ready to move along. I've been working on trying to hold out and let people finish. How do you keep your brain slowed down long enough to allow people the time to express themselves? This is my whole social dilemma right here. I can follow a large group of conversations and still feel like I'm interrupting people or skipping ahead.

12-08-2009, 08:19 AM	#5 (permalink)
escapeplan Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Europe Posts: 839	I think Dale Carneige in "How to win friends and influence people" probably nailed the answer and techniques to this question.

12-08-2009, 09:43 AM	#6 (permalink)
Cool Chick Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: USA Posts: 118	Listen. With your ears, eyes, heart, soul, nose, toes, prose. Really really listen. Be still. Focus. Breathe in your partner, want to know. Want to be on top of the empathy, loving embrace of “I hear you.”. Lean forward, rapt in the knowledge of the imparting of stories. You’d guffaw at how much people just want to be heard! Your time to talk will come about. Always does. For now … zip the lip and open the earbuds, listen as if life depended on the words of your compadre. Caring compassion means attention. Practice such and listening will come natural. You should be a little spent after active listening. No barriers. No formal training here except years of listening for a living. People truly just want to be heard.

Personal Development for Smart PeopleTM Forums

Personal Development for Smart People^TM Forums