Mountain

[LadyLois]

Hi

At work I am driven, efficient and highly organised - I prioritise my workload and complete my own daily goals with enthusiam and my bosses are VERY pleased with my abilities and I enjoy my work.

BUT

At home it is another matter. My house is a mess and my family life is in tatters. Okay, family issues are another matter - but why can't I put my work ethic into my home? I set goals and make plans - but those are the worst procrastination tools! I know one of the problems is that my 'troubled' teenage daughter will only trash the place again and again and undo all my hard work... and so I live in utter chaos and it gets me down. My house is not a home - it is not how I want to live.

In fact, I spend most of my time trying to figure ways of not being there... and that is the real crux of the matter... The whole thing is like a huge moutain before me...

Any suggestions?

[Joel Chue]

Have you wonder what's the main problem?

Why can't you do the same at home?

[da1prophet]

I think you may have answered your own question--you enjoy being at work and have control over your environment there. From the sound of it you dread being at home and feel you don't have control of your environment there. The effort you exert at work produces a tangible benefit, while my perception is that you feel what you do at home doesn't.

In any case, I wouldn't be so hard on yourself. It's very difficult to have complete control and balance over every area of your life. It's a worthy goal, of course, but much more difficult to implement. Furthermore, your situation is very common--and particularly with high achievers. I'm a big boxing fan, and there are countless championship level boxers past and present who are nearly flawless inside the ring but who's lives are complete train wrecks outside. Not saying that your non professional life is a "train wreck", but the point is that success, organization and discipline in one area of life doesn't automatically translate over to every other area.

From the sound of it, my thinking is that your family issues are the crux of your problem. Maybe you should try to address those first and proceed from there...

[Pegasus]

I recommend FlyLady.net: Your personal online coach to help you gain control of your house and home , which is designed for those of us living with clutter. Perfectionism and lack of routines keep our homes in a state of chaos.

[LadyLois]

Yes, Da1prophet, you are right, I DO know the problem ... however, FLYlady looks great and after reading it through, I can do that! I have a break in Berlin this week, but upon my return I shall take the babysteps... thank you very much Pegasus!

[Isabelle]

I'm a FlyBaby since 2004 and FlyLady changed my life forever.

I also recommend it to everyone !