Rapport

[ar81]

How do you achieve rapport?

[Remiel]

What is rapport?

[Chris_1977]

I cannot say I am good at that. Usually I let the other person do it. My ideal conversation is where the other person asks the interesting questions and I give the interesting answers. In a way that is okay because there actually are quite a few people who like to probe... on the other hand I do sometimes have the feeling that it is limiting.

[ssandra]

mirror their movements. Not in a way that they notice, but very subtly.

Use active listing skills, don't just be quiet when they talk but say, aha, ow I see etc.

Ask questions so they see you have been really listing.

Use words that they are using

If they are very auditive for example say "I hear you" instead of "I see".

Besides this it is also a matter of personality. With some people, no matter how much you try, you will never achieve good rapport, because you are just to different.

[FazK]

You should read up on NLP there are a massive number of techniques that you can use to gain rapport quickly with someone. Another thing you can do is basically to "assume rapport" this means you just talk to a person as if there your best friend and you've known them forever

[Thekla]

I listen, express empathy, use humor, and try to notice how they communicate and what's important to them so that I can interact with them on their wavelength

[dulaney0330]

Originally Posted by Thekla

I listen, express empathy, use humor, and try to notice how they communicate and what's important to them so that I can interact with them on their wavelength

I do the same. I often say, "Well, it sounds like you had a hard day!" or "hmm...is that like that a lot?" The common idea is that people like to talk about themselves and they also enjoy compliments. I try to give compliments as much as I can..genuine, of course!

It's really about a sincere care/interest in the other person that serves me the best with rapport.

[sidsavara]

One small thing I started doing is thinking about interesting things I had done recently, and of activities I was taking part in, or would be taking part in.

For example, hiking, playing tennis, concerts, poetry readings and psychology research are all interests of mine. I think up a few as a mental "cheat sheet" before I go out

For example, on my website I debunk the Harvard 3% goal setting study. That's always a great story for people I meet who share my interest in goal setting and personal development. I also hired a cook off craig's list to save myself time on cooking. People love that story as well - just knowing I have it in the back of my mind helps put me at ease, and when the conversation eases or dulls, I just say "Hey, how much time do you think you spend each week cooking? Do you cook a lot, or eat out?" ... and then it's off talking about a subject I enjoy, and that people often find interesting

And well, if all my stories strike out, thenI am not sure what I would do. Fail to build rapport most likely

If you're interested, these are the articles I mentioned. Feel free to use them to build rapport =P

Fact or Fiction? The Truth About The Harvard Written Goal Study

The Price of my Dreams – $60 a Week