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| Personal Effectiveness Goals, productivity, time management, motivation, self-discipline, overcoming procrastination, habits, organizing, problem-solving, decision-making, intelligence |
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06-20-2009, 05:02 AM
| #33 (permalink) |
| Junior Member Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 9
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Whatever your reasons are, I find that abstaining from masturbation has many benefits- Increased confidence and energy Less need for sleep More creativity More attraction from opposite sex Better communication skills I have been experimenting for a while, but it seems that this is definitely not placebo effect. It seems to peak around 4-10 days, and then seems to stabilize a bit with random bouts of energy further on. at 3-4 weeks I don't even have the urge anymore. If I masturbate a lot, (everyday for few days or even more) I find my mood turns apathetic and I end up sleeping instead of doing things I need to do. If you fill yourself with activities to do it will be MUCH easier. When you are sitting around bored it is almost impossible to achieve your goal. If I work so hard that I am exhausted at night, then I will not be tempted to masturbate at all. Hard physical work (or exercise), will be your only route to stopping. Let us know how you go. |
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06-20-2009, 02:02 PM
| #34 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 120
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I find the story of Adam and his relationship to God in the first book of Genesis interesting, and telling of its development. It's a story of the "fall of man." It's the story of the fall of all of us. It's the story of the fall of you. Initially we see only God - Adam was in God. Then God created Adam. After that Adam was still very close to God. So close, in fact, the God was a large part of Adam, and Adam was a large part of God. There was no division between the two. The two were one. All things to Adam were God/Good. Adam saw God in everything. Then we see Adam eating some fruit. At that point he begins to see things as good and bad. He experiences division. He begins to fall from his intimate relationship with God. Adam puts on clothes because he is ashamed. He doesn't want God or anyone else to see his "naughty" parts. Adam becomes afraid. He is ashamed. Adam - who had been seeing God in everything - then begins to see Good and Bad - and Adam sees bad all over the place. He begins to judge - judging bad from good - rather than letting God be the judge. And, in that, Adam, himself, becomes aspects of bad. This angers God. From both perspectives - God sees an Adam that is outside and separate from God, and Adam sees a God that is outside and separate from Adam. God is not angered because Adam put on clothes. God is angered because Adam felt shame. It is Adam's fear that attracted a vengeful aspect of God. It is Adam's fear that creates a vengeful God - within Adam's experience. That's an important lesson to take in. And we need to understand that the motivations behind our actions are much more important than the actions themselves. Interesting article... Masturbation: God's Great Gift to Us Last edited by Dot; 06-20-2009 at 02:07 PM. |
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06-20-2009, 02:23 PM
| #36 (permalink) |
| Family Member Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,235
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adam wasn't ignorant he was given the knowledge of all he should have needed to know if he had just let things be and obey...but it was like things were almost too simple and easy and good...so when eve met the serpent and offered adam some of the apple it was oh well...let us see what we are missing...the tree wasn't some trick prop...it was a test of love and faith and trust...before that the difference between good and evil almost didn't need to be an issue it just was....imo
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06-20-2009, 02:26 PM
| #37 (permalink) |
| Banned Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 3,001
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When I say he was ignorant, I don't mean it as an insult. We're all ignorant of many things. Adam was ignorant, as in, Adam was "lacking knowledge or information as to a particular subject or fact." In this case, Adam was ignorant of evil. From a Christian perspective, if God has full knowledge of everything, then God knew Adam would eat the fruit. And yet, God put it there anyway. In a sense, God wanted Adam to eat it, or at least wanted to give Adam the resources to betray God (which God knew he would). In this perspective, God must love Satan, because without Satan and evil, then God couldn't be good. What is good if there is no evil? Good can not exist without Bad. |
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06-20-2009, 02:36 PM
| #38 (permalink) |
| Banned Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 22,520
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Personally, I think masturbation is just good sense, quality maintenance on this extraordinary, high-performance body. It keeps everything in tip-top shape! But it doesn't matter for JaredR's purposes what I believe; what matters here is that HE notices masturbation gets in the way of getting the results he wants. Whatever comes up (sorry  ) during this 30 days is his lesson, it's his experience. People give up or take on things that I wouldn't want to give up or take on in 30 day trials all the time around here! Sometimes I've thought, "why are people distracting the OP with their own opinions and morality?" ... and now I get it: that distraction is perfect! JaredR, you have the perfect opportunity to really test yourself, if you want it, by hearing what people have to say (you opened yourself up to it after all, don't forget!), and practicing being what you want to be. I think that's great! It inspires me to want to do a 30-day trial, one in which people are sure to have contrary opinions, just to see how generous I can be with what I want! Anyway, continuing great luck in your quest. |
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06-20-2009, 02:48 PM
| #39 (permalink) | |
| Banned Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 3,001
| Quote:
 I think eating well and exercise are probably the best ways to maintain our health, though if masturbation relieves stress for someone, I can see how that would be helpful. On the other hand, if you need to masturbate to relieve stress, then that starts to sound like compulsive behavior. | |
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06-20-2009, 02:56 PM
| #40 (permalink) | |
| Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 120
| Quote:
God is ever-creating. From God's POV - all is God. But we "fall" and see what we judge as "bad" to be not God/Good. And we judge what is good - in our own eyes, not God's. It freaks us out. We become afraid. Fear makes us do some strange stuff. At some point - after we've done enough fear-motivated weirdness and find out, firsthand, where that gets us - and even what we think is good (from our POV) - can turn on us. We work and toil and trouble - and still we receive no manna (spiritual nourishment). At some point a light goes off. We see the true limitations of our thinking intellect - and the futility of being slaves to our emotions. We see that we are asleep and trapped in matter. The light that goes off could be called the germination of the seeds of "faith." They are seeds that were there all along - inside us. They were growing and active when we were very young - as children. As we grow older we begin listening more to man's designs than God's designs. We listen to authorities who tell us what to do if we want to make our own way in the world. We are told what is bad and what is good. Very often, the bad becomes the focus. We become fear-motivated - always moving away from what we judge to be bad. Of course, we want to do "good" - but the problem is we often end up defining good by - what is not bad. Back to the seeds. They're in our DNA. We just stopped using them. We wanted to use our own "personal" power instead of being channels for God's power. It's all God's power, anyway. There is only one power. So, if we provide good ground for the seeds of faith to begin germinating and growing, we begin to allow God to operate through us. This process changes us, and we, again, become as little children. We feel lighter. We have more energy. We stop wasting so much of God's energy swimming upstream and judging what is good and what is bad - in our own eyes. We come to understand that what we think we see with our own two eyes - is an illusion. And that illusion has trapped us. We come to understand - if we have eyes to see and ears to hear. And we begin the journey of return from the fall, and are, once again, naturally creative - and, as children, become a more unified expression of God's work. The light of the body is the eye: if therefore thine eye be single, thy whole body shall be full of light. - Matthew 6:22 My 2¢. | |
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06-20-2009, 03:02 PM
| #41 (permalink) |
| Banned Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 3,001
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When I see two year olds hit each other, refuse to share toys, and scream... I smirk at the idea that children are "more accurate" expressions of God than adults. And of course children feel lighter. They only weigh like... 30 pounds! And of course they have more energy. They sleep all day! (I'm playing, of course. I get what you're saying) |
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06-20-2009, 03:04 PM
| #42 (permalink) |
| Family Member Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,235
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dd...i find your theory about good and evil fascinating...but as i said in my opinion good just was before the apple incident...what also was, was CHOICE....and that alone can cause good or evil...i think that is the main thing that God gave man: choice...he doesn't have to love satan and evil so that there can be good...choice in many situations can be the difference between good and evil or a bad outcome in a situation...if you go on your theory...God planned all this so Jesus would have to suffer crucifiction for the ignorant people he created  ....it is something to ponder though...what if there was only good in the world...would that be soooo bad...i really wonder if deep down man likes strife, inequality, war, poverty, pain, misery, addiction, etc, etc...just to mix things up a bit and make it interesting |
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06-20-2009, 03:06 PM
| #43 (permalink) | |
| Banned Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 22,520
| Quote:
It's like I don't think of drinking cool, clean water as a "thirst reliever" -- I think of it as a blessing tonic for my body. Just like masturbation! | |
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06-20-2009, 03:09 PM
| #44 (permalink) | ||
| Banned Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 3,001
| Quote:
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So here we have a God that demands perfection, knowing that it's impossible to be perfect as a human, and to satisfy His own demands for perfection, He sends a version of Himself to Earth (Jesus Christ), and then has Himself suffer and die for human sins, just to satisfy His own desire for perfection. It's like punching yourself in the face! After looking for an answer to this paradox and talking to preachers and other people for years, I came to the realization that "ya know, I just don't believe in this stuff!" Some people are happy to accept that "God works in mysterious ways," but being mysterious and being illogical are two different things. I just focus on the two main things Jesus said to focus on. "Love God and love your neighbors." Of course, I probably don't believe in the same type of God that some Christians do. And I also added a third idea -- "Love yourself."  | ||
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06-20-2009, 03:38 PM
| #46 (permalink) |
| Family Member Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,235
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God expected man to be obedient...not perfect...so i still don't believe that he intentionally wanted to create evil with choice to be obedient or not...or that he loves satan to keep evil in the world so there can be good...if you do not believe in God...you cannot believe in that either. the choice of partaking of the fruit did not necessarily create evil persay....it merely upset the perfection that man had the choice to maintain. and anything that happened after that created all sorts of circumstances of more choice...some situations of behaving well or badly...sometimes good or evil situations or choices...which over time led up needing to have Jesus try to turn things around so man could find his way back to the kind of life God wanted us to have....not war, killing, torture, abuse, poverty, etc. etc. etc....the lack of belief...whether it is a "god" in the traditonal sense or not...to me i just a way of justifying all the bad or evil choices in the world...like we are not perfect...this is par...nothing we can do about it...to me it is very defeatist...
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06-20-2009, 04:01 PM
| #47 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 120
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People often masturbate to relieve anxiety as a way of moving energy in their bodies. They don't know it, but that's what they're doing. Anxiety is the result over "over-thinking" - being too much up in the head/brain area. That brings too much energy into the head area - and we - in a very real way - begin to short-circuit. That creates tension and dis-ease in the body. In some cases people will look at pornography simply because it's an aid for lowering the energy out of their head and down into the lower part of their bodies - to the sexual center. This becomes a vicious cycle. It's also often why so many people are constantly seeking out sex - and in places, and with people, they really shouldn't be involved with. God created sex. And sexual power is some very potent energy. But when we jump in the driver's seat of a machine (our own body-mind) that we do not understand, we wind up driving into the trees, running off the road, and not getting where we want to go. Sex occurs on a continuum of levels - depending on the focus of, and reason behind, the sexual act. On lower levels - the attention and energy is centered on the genitals - the act is only focused on the physical level. These are the levels where people often feel ashamed and guilty afterwards - even with masturbation. On higher levels the attention is on the heart and on sacredness. These are the levels where the focus is on love, and sharing, and an exchange and union of energy together. It is Adam and Eve before the fall into matter. On an energy level, over a period of time, Adam become too much Adam, and Eve becomes too much Eve. In the sex act, they unite and share and blend energies and become one flesh again. The highest levels of attention and energy are God-centered - where the attention and energy expand to the entire universe - and man is, again, one with God. This is Adam as he was (IS, really, if we want to get technical) during the initial spiritual-blueprint creation when he was/is Adam Kadmon. Last edited by Dot; 06-20-2009 at 04:36 PM. |
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06-20-2009, 04:23 PM
| #48 (permalink) | ||
| Banned Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 3,001
| Quote:
Note: I've been speaking about the Christian perspective, not my personal one. My point is that to enter Heaven, you have to be sinless. This is impossible for a human to do. So God has setup a system where we automatically fail and need someone to "take our blame" for us. So God sent Himself (or His son) to take the blame for His creations because His creations do not abide by His own rules. I consider our discussion to be on topic because God's just playing with Himself, apparently. In all seriousness, we may consider continuing this somewhere else.Quote:
So to me we have two beliefs. 1. God knowingly created Evil, or 2. God doesn't know everything. | ||
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06-20-2009, 04:35 PM
| #49 (permalink) |
| Legendary Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Where Living and Loving and Laughing are written into the Constitution
Posts: 14,240
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I am a christian by the overall culture and philosophy I was born into but am an agnostic. When I read (and do a lot) about religion I can't see this omnipotent power being so small and petty in creating anything obedient and ready so suffer. But that is just me... not looking for a debate here! As for masturbation I think it is a very good stress relief and totally different for the 2 sexes. In young men as JaredR is it is totally normal to get carried away at times and do it so many times a day. For girls it is more a way to discover their own body. Many grown men masturbate even when they have a partner/or regular sex. Women also.. an orgasm is an orgasm, nice sensation to have so I can't see the wrong or right here except the fact that the young man wants to try to be "strong" for 30 days. I can't see really why just not decide to do it 3 times a week, but this is his decision and his own test of his "character".
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06-20-2009, 04:42 PM
| #50 (permalink) |
| Family Member Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,235
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dd you make some good points and i think a lot of it gets down to either personal or literal interpretation of the bible....part of faith is knowing that we are not supposed to understand and know everything...and maybe for the sake of arguement...maybe because adam and eve were created in his image, he didn't think he had to know everthing ...because adam and eve were supposed to be perfectly obedient...but they threw a monkey wrench in his plans so he put in the "know everything" clause...i is say this tonge and cheek of course because of what i stated above....and i so back to the original issue...he knew men (and women) would be pleasuring themselves and he again would give them a myriad of choices about it...with of course, one of the choices being what he would ultimately like to see man evolve to....
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06-20-2009, 05:39 PM
| #51 (permalink) |
| Junior Member Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 5
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Hey'all Just joined the forums and interestingly enough this was the first topic that caught my attention.  I'm interested in trying this out as well. I had a question as far as the whole 30-day-trial thing is concerned though. My objective is to eventually be able to not ejaculate for periods of 10-14 days, not to quit masturbation/ejaculation entirely (heaven forbid, lol). Should I still attempt to target 30 days or just the 10-14? Considering that it'll be the first thing I intend to do after 30 days. Lol. |
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06-20-2009, 06:36 PM
| #52 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: New Milford, CT
Posts: 450
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the longest I ever went without masturbation or any sexual thoughts at all was 2 1/2 years, or about 28 months straight. I then decided to experiment and see if masturbation really did provide any benefits and I came to the conclusion that it is best just to let the body expell the semen itself--that is, allow the body to have wet dreams instead of masturbation or sex.
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06-20-2009, 06:38 PM
| #53 (permalink) |
| Family Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Home
Posts: 2,578
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I've tried to do this numerous times, but after 15 or so days, I just can't help myself. Sometimes I can go longer, but it's part of my lifestyle. You remember "The Contest" episode of Seinfeld. It's like shaving. To be frank, though, I have gone 15 days without shaving. Go figure. I can tell you that if you don't have anything to stimulate you sexually and you avoid having sexual thoughts or when you do have them, you have a way to get your erection down. I've gone over a month before. But it was after I had a very invasive and extensive brain surgery. By then I was ready to explode. It's just very hard to last 30 days, but if you really set your mind to it, you can do it. I'll just warn you That it will not be an easy road and there will be times where you will need to distract yourself. |
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06-20-2009, 07:13 PM
| #54 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: New Milford, CT
Posts: 450
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Here is my theory: I believe that the real "answer" is that God should have never created anything at all! Think about it: Christianity is all about pure discipline. if you go all the way down the road of true Christianity, you end up with my original statement: God should have never created anything at all. Creating was like his one big mistake. I know this is all a little difficult to accept, but it is all part of the "real" "answer"!
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06-20-2009, 09:30 PM
| #55 (permalink) |
| Family Member Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,852
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Masterbation (and porn) is not morally wrong. There is nothing sinful or evil about the human body and sexual desire. But the consequnces of ejaculation are actually pretty severe for a guy. The rewards of giving it up are great. As in, life-transforming. And fortunately, you don't have to give up sexual pleasure to reap the rewards of not ejaculating. Any man reading this and wondering what I'm talking about, I would seriously advise taking the time to watch the following videos: http://www.reuniting.info/resources/videos_on_sex_without_orgasm| Reuniting And for those with undeserved guilty conciences regarding porn, this could help as well: Help! Porn Addiction in Progress | Reuniting |
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06-22-2009, 01:41 AM
| #57 (permalink) | |
| Banned Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 3,001
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Good job. Quote:
How about this instead: I suspect it will be even easier after the first week. I mean, if I can do it for 7 days, what's another 7 days, and another 7 days, and so on? | |
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06-22-2009, 02:08 AM
| #58 (permalink) | |
| Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 274
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06-22-2009, 02:16 AM
| #59 (permalink) | |
| Banned Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 22,520
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Well, I for one would like to hear more about what you'll be doing, seeing, hearing, and feeling as you come closer to God. That would inspire me. Feel free to pad your log with that! | |
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06-22-2009, 03:53 AM
| #60 (permalink) | |
| Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Akron, Ohio, United States
Posts: 41
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BTW, on Day 4 here and no problems thus far. | |
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