Marijuana and being in touch with yourself

[treetopliving]

Hi all,

Just a general question for all who have dealt with this problem:

It seems the only time I am truly in touch with myself is when I am high from marijuana. I smoke every day, but am thoroughly committed to self help philosophies. A duality I am aware of.

The reason I smoke so much, is because I get in touch with myself. If I did not feel relaxed, accepting, and connected with my "soul" or whatever you call it, I would not smoke.

For the life of me, I cannot seem to jolt myself away from my anxiety I have when I am sober to connect me with who I am. I am swept up in my environment, and I feel I lose control of things very quickly.

I do not want to dependent on weed to be calm and content, but currently it's the only answer I have to solving my problem.

Has anyone else ever dealt with this problem? Any advice?

[JacksEarth]

Maybe you should try using some nice odor incense and meditation.
But I think I can relate, I don't see the problem with using weed to relax.

I don't think its bad either.
Pills, cigarettes and alcohol are the real killers.

[dave marshall]

Hi,

for me the idea of suyaing you are 'in touch' with yourself whilst smoking dope is a contradiction, however we each have our own version of what being in touch means,

dave

[Talkofthatown919]

well i used to smoke weed every chance i got when i was younger. I would so call quit once and then be right back to puffing again. The way i got in touch with myself is by looking ahead. Why do you smoke weed that is clearly to become more in touch with yourself. Find something that will allow you to become more in touch with yourself. While doing so find out a way where you will be able to distance yourself from marijuana use if that is what you are trying to do.

[wolfgang]

I think the OP should try a 30day experiment.

No - not to quit - but to totally stay completely and utterly baked for 30 days. Puff as soon as you wake up, right after your shower. In the bathroom at starbucks, behind the bushes on your walk to class or the parking lot to your cubical. Take puff breaks every hour or more. make sure you stay high. get high in between classes or meetings, trying to get things done. get high after work/school and on the way home, and then once at home keep a joint rolling and make sure to smoke some if you get up to pee int he middle of the night. Then see if you are in touch with yourself or not after 30 days being high 24/7...

[aggie]

i much prefer pills and alcohol....seriously...i was married to a stoner for 17 years...he started in vietnam...long before i met him...was a bonafide hippie, before i met him...anyway...was not smoking pot when i met him...but family/friends doing it and offering got him started again and i tried it...but it did nothing for me until i had some laced with something and thought i was gonna die from paranoia!...he was a very intelliegent, talented musician who ended up falling back into the daily stoned routine...claimed it made him mellow, more in touch with himself, able to focus...blah, blah, blah....that is fine if you are by yourself and don't have a wife and a mortage and don't risk, at least back then getting arrested and losing a lot...he was mean when he tried to quit and it would take him 15 minutes to answer a yes or no question...he had absolutely no sex drive...and he ended up choosing the company of a fellow pot smoker to me most of the time...the only thing that made him stop for a while was a job where drug testing was mandatory....i am telling this from the other side obviously but all the while you think you are getting in touch with yourself...you could be losing a lot more of yourself than you realize....don't get me wrong...if someone can honestly take a hit to unwind at the end of the day, like someone has a glass of wine, i have no problem and make no judgements...it is when the smoking becomes your reality that there could be a problem....either way, i hope you find what you need....

[LOVE4LIFE]

I like to call myself a "weekend worrier" there's nothing like smoking a bowl Friday night to calm the nerves. I like to use the high creatively, instead of making being bored OK. Plus I'd rather get hit by a stoned driver going 15MPH versus a drunk driver going 120 MPH i find that working out helps me not smoke as much.

[aggie]

honest question...what makes pot the "creative" drug?...i don't think crack heads (i've known a couple...and they both also smoked pot) are particularly creative...i don't feel particularly creative when i drink a glass of wine....i mean is it true or just a glamorizing of the substance?....also do you believe that it can lead to or is an adjunct of other substances?...i am going by what i observed with people around me....i would like to be enlightened....thanks

[TaylorLord]

ha ha Wolfgang the whole 30 days blazed up and 30 days dry actually has been done in this funny movie called "Super High Me". It was pretty ridiculous but it was in the name of science so I thought it was cool! The comedian in the movie had to do all sorts of memory and IQ tests before smoking and then after. The results were iffy, but never the less it was truly entertaining. .

Aggie I would say that within certain artistic personalities pot is a form that boosts self expression. Although sometimes people go too far! I remember smoking pot in high school and I really enjoyed playing my guitar high. I do admit it did bring me some inspiration but at the same time I am easily amused so what do I know..If that's peoples cup of tea we gotta love em anyways

[aggie]

i guess that is why i stayed with ex for 17 years night all!

[wolfgang]

to the OP again: the part about:

For the life of me, I cannot seem to jolt myself away from my anxiety I have when I am sober to connect me with who I am. I am swept up in my environment, and I feel I lose control of things very quickly.

maybe mild withdraw symptoms when you try to go sober.

[themaster]

Originally Posted by treetopliving

Hi all,

Just a general question for all who have dealt with this problem:

It seems the only time I am truly in touch with myself is when I am high from marijuana. I smoke every day, but am thoroughly committed to self help philosophies. A duality I am aware of.

The reason I smoke so much, is because I get in touch with myself. If I did not feel relaxed, accepting, and connected with my "soul" or whatever you call it, I would not smoke.

For the life of me, I cannot seem to jolt myself away from my anxiety I have when I am sober to connect me with who I am. I am swept up in my environment, and I feel I lose control of things very quickly.

I do not want to dependent on weed to be calm and content, but currently it's the only answer I have to solving my problem.

Has anyone else ever dealt with this problem?

No, in a different form maybe..

Any advice?

Well, why is it you feel that only this substance can connect you to you?

Why can't you replicate that feeling in your life.. what hangups, beliefs, ideas and fears about yourself do you have to hold.. you back from you?

I mean.. let's be honest.. when you were a child did you need the "weed" to connect you with you??

[ginkgo]

Here is something from my site. The main thing is that the long term effect of a drug is the opposite of the short term effect. Drugs cause a slingshot effect. You get a long term effect to the opposite of the short term effect. This is due to homeostasis. My 1,900 page Mosby Medical Dictionary defines homeostasis as: "[Gk, homoios + stasis, standing still] a relative constancy in the internal environment of the body, naturally maintained by the adaptive responses that promote healthy survival. Various sensing, feedback, and control mechanisms function to effect this steady state."

Whatever effect the drug has on the body, the body produces an opposite effect to balance it out. If you have no trouble getting to sleep, then take sleeping pills every night for a week and then try to get to sleep without them. So whatever pleasurable effect the alcohol has temporarily, it has the opposite effect on you permanently. This is the same with all drugs. You can take drugs to make you high, but then the body produces an opposite effect on you. If you do things like exercise, yoga and meditation then your body produces its own chemicals to make you feel good.

Here is an example in physics of this happening. When you push on a wall, the reason that the wall does not move is because it is pushing back against you with the same force. The harder you push, the harder the wall pushes back against you and that is why it does not move. If you run into a wall, you get knocked back in the opposite direction due to it pushing back against you. If you create more force on it, than it can push back with, then it will move and you will break through it.

[jeff3]

Why do you think the creator of your body put cannabinoid receptors in your brain? Yes, there are specific receptors in your brain that the active ingredient in cannabis is the only key to fit them, well, actually your body produces cannabinoids in small amounts, but what a coincidence. It seems the human race "manifested" a natural remedy for many of life's little problems. All things in moderation.

[aggie]

my personal twist is....yes,maybe some things in moderation...this does not apply to all substances or whatever...some just can't be or some people just have addictived personalities and cannot do in moderation....and this applies to all aspects of life...not just drugs....but i feel no matter what you think you need or do to achieve it with a substance...eventually, unless you stay high or whatever all the time...when it wears off...reality is still just as it was before and must be dealt with.

[Remiel]

Originally Posted by themaster

Has anyone else ever dealt with this problem?

No, in a different form maybe..

Any advice?

Well, why is it you feel that only this substance can connect you to you?

Why can't you replicate that feeling in your life.. what hangups, beliefs, ideas and fears about yourself do you have to hold.. you back from you?

I mean.. let's be honest.. when you were a child did you need the "weed" to connect you with you??

Well, I didn't struggle with weed but I did struggle in the same way. My addiction was with video games and I played them for the same reason. To find myself. In the real world I was asperger's boy. A label that had destroyed who I was. Once I was in a video game I was free to be me. No more masks, no more labels, just me. I didn't have to worry about what I was or wasn't doing. I just spent hours drifting away in the land of mmo's. Plus I could actually be good in an mmo. Something that I never was in real life. The freedom to be me was what kept me in there for so long.

What finally helped me break out of it was first going to an experiential seminar called Focus. It helped me rediscover who I was on the inside. From there I just started reading personal development books and this blog.

But the biggest problem I had was finding something to replace video games with. Eventually I was able to replace my hours of video games with hours of personal development. The motivation behind this though is that I discovered my purpose. That in and of itself has defined a path that excites me and motivates me to be the best that I can.

What would happen if you were to find a life that you love to live? And not one that drives you to worry?

[themaster]

Originally Posted by Remiel

Well, I didn't struggle with weed but I did struggle in the same way. My addiction was with video games and I played them for the same reason. To find myself. In the real world I was asperger's boy. A label that had destroyed who I was. Once I was in a video game I was free to be me. No more masks, no more labels, just me. I didn't have to worry about what I was or wasn't doing. I just spent hours drifting away in the land of mmo's. Plus I could actually be good in an mmo. Something that I never was in real life. The freedom to be me was what kept me in there for so long.

You seem to be describing games as a "bad" thing.. they are not far from it.. they are a great way to explore reality.. they allow some of us to be ourselves as a choice rather to engage in limiting behavior in this reality..

They provide fun and longing and beauty and even some hate and suffering

Originally Posted by Remiel

Self development stuff..

I'm glad you found a different expression in life to do.. but never be ashamed of anything you do because it's all valid.. doesn't matter if it's murder or games, anything that you enjoy doing and everything you do is perfect from the right perspective

Originally Posted by Remiel

What would happen if you were to find a life that you love to live? And not one that drives you to worry?

This is all what we should be trying to do.. and we should ignore the message of those that preach "worry"..

[Remiel]

Originally Posted by themaster

You seem to be describing games as a "bad" thing.. they are not far from it.. they are a great way to explore reality.. they allow some of us to be ourselves as a choice rather to engage in limiting behavior in this reality..

They provide fun and longing and beauty and even some hate and suffering



I'm glad you found a different expression in life to do.. but never be ashamed of anything you do because it's all valid.. doesn't matter if it's murder or games, anything that you enjoy doing and everything you do is perfect from the right perspective


This is all what we should be trying to do.. and we should ignore the message of those that preach "worry"..

Yup. I do agree that there isn't anything fundamentally bad with video games. Same goes for TV, Movies, Books, and other things. Where I see it becoming bad is on a personal level. When they are simply ways to escape reality then they become bad. Video Games were my chains for so long. Because I didn't have to deal with reality I could simply exist. In alot of ways I was very much like a zombie. A living deadman. Is that any way to live life?

[ballhit2]

Originally Posted by treetopliving

Hi all,

Just a general question for all who have dealt with this problem:

It seems the only time I am truly in touch with myself is when I am high from marijuana. I smoke every day, but am thoroughly committed to self help philosophies. A duality I am aware of.

The reason I smoke so much, is because I get in touch with myself. If I did not feel relaxed, accepting, and connected with my "soul" or whatever you call it, I would not smoke.

For the life of me, I cannot seem to jolt myself away from my anxiety I have when I am sober to connect me with who I am. I am swept up in my environment, and I feel I lose control of things very quickly.

I do not want to dependent on weed to be calm and content, but currently it's the only answer I have to solving my problem.

Has anyone else ever dealt with this problem? Any advice?

Yeah, save all the money spent on those lightweight baggies and get yourself a sauna membership and a massage therapist. Then buy some at-home thing for the other days.

You can get relaxed in other ways if you so choose.

I guess the other thing to try would be figure out the absolute minimum quantity that you need to have a day. And then try 0.1 g less than that. Keep going until you have a hit a day, and then just do that for 10 years, and then stop.

[Manomanman]

I know exactly what you're talking about. I was like this for about a year, and then it got stale and old.

What's you're referring to is the fact that you feel like the product of your environment rather than a spiritual being, a being that lives for itself and within itself. For example, when you're stoned your senses are heightened, food tastes better, music sounds better, it's more fun to do things. You feel "like a kid again".

The problem is that as time goes on, you'll end up feeling like you're in a bubble, like the world is passing you by.

My advice is to keep doing it until it doesn't feel right anymore. The moment you start experiencing anxiety rather than euphoria, kick the habit as others are suggesting.

Until then, enjoy

[aelle]

Hi Treetopliving,

I don't think the smoking in itself is a problem. I choose not to do it anymore for the time being, but I do indulge in behaviours that aren't perfect for my health and I don't think there is a need to defend such a choice if it is actually that, a choice.

However this:

Originally Posted by treetopliving

For the life of me, I cannot seem to jolt myself away from my anxiety I have when I am sober to connect me with who I am. I am swept up in my environment, and I feel I lose control of things very quickly.

seems to be more of a problem to me. If your anxiety is so high that you need to do drugs to deal with it or be comfortable with yourself, then you're probably not very happy much of the time. You'd probably be much better off dealing with the root of the problem than with the symptom.
There are many ways to deal with anxiety, including speech therapy and lifestyle changes like exercise, relaxation, meditation and food habits... I think you should at least discuss your options with a friendly health professional to get guidance on these solutions.

[themaster]

Originally Posted by Remiel

Yup. I do agree that there isn't anything fundamentally bad with video games. Same goes for TV, Movies, Books, and other things. Where I see it becoming bad is on a personal level. When they are simply ways to escape reality then they become bad. Video Games were my chains for so long. Because I didn't have to deal with reality I could simply exist. In alot of ways I was very much like a zombie. A living deadman. Is that any way to live life?

It absolutely is.. you are defining the virtual world as being a not a part of us.. it very much is.. are you forgetting that the virtual world allows you to explore strange planets? experience adventure without danger? have a laugh at a comedy game? and you know the list goes on.. and this includes the idea I think as I already stated of escaping from the "negative nancy's" who are all over this planet and want you to get involved in there so called "problem" which if you get involved then you’re making it your "problem"

But like you I am wanting to pull back from the virtual life and experience more *real* life.. still I will try and not invalidate who I was or where I came from or what I will find as fun..