Do you have complementary habits?

[Zenduba]

You've probably how your habits will influence your level of success/health/financial wealth etc. but the nature of the habits is often overlooked. A ritual is basically a collection of (say about 3-5, anything more than 2) habits that complement one another. How many times have you read a book/article that talks about how you should set a goal, make a plan then work on the most important task first etc.

All too often I'll set a goal and try to achieve it and find that it's not just a question of having one habit but a series of habits that will really help me to accomplish it. Some people are great when it comes to starting with the most important task, but they're not so good when it comes to completing tasks. Some people complete them, but not so well. Then there's the group that never gets started, and finally the group with no goals...

We could get into a semantics debate here because I know all productive habits eventually complement one another, but I'm talking about specific habits in relation to a goal. If your goal is to get fit: [taking the initiative + self discipline + quality + persistence] would work much better than [gratitude + discipline + humor + loyalty], but hey, that's just my opinion.

I think if we really want to see some tangible changes, we have to take our weaknesses into account (e.g. procrastination, low energy, lack of clarity) and set goals in a manner in which we maximize our strengths and block our weaknesses - hence the need for complementary habits. I'm not saying you should try and do many things at once, stick to starting small but once you've decided what it is you want to accomplish then advance on all fronts.

Leave nothing to chance - take action!

[alainplus]

I'm going to reply using my life as an example instead of just being my generic self I usually am.

I mentioned this before. Starting this year, I started learning Japanese with the goal of being literate at the end of this year and fluent mid next year. Being midway through this goal, this is probably one of the hardest things I've ever done in my life. Now under your category of people, I stand under the people with no goals and also people who start but quit. I've been this way for a long time. Aside from exercise, this is probably the only goal in my life that's been worked on consistently. Before this, I was rather aimless. I was doing very good in school; been on the Dean's List for 2 years now. Nevertheless, school was repetitive, increasingly easy. I was bored. Very Bored. So why have I clinged on to THIS goal so tightly that I enjoy and look forward to the mental tiredness it brings after 8-12 hrs of studying it, every single day? Even after a tiring day at work, I can't wait to study my Japanese. I've become very obsessed with this goal.

Now it didn't start out this way. I started studying haphazardly. Doing it on and off. I became more involved by searching for Japanese resources that interested me. Instead of a boring textbook, I came to rely mostly on Japanese short stories and a bilingual Bible. Slow learning curve but paid off in the end. My interest wanes pretty easily once I get good at something or once I do something for long enough; otherwise I quit. That's just something I've learned about myself. Studying started to become monotonous. I did think about quitting just LAST WEEK. I thought long and hard if I wanted to quit something I'd working on for months. Until I got a new idea. Cover my study wall with Japanese!



This endeavor is a week old and should carry me till the end of the June when I need to think up something new. Even bought different color pens to keep me entertained. Childish, but I don't really care. It keeps me learning.

So my concluding remarks here is:
1. People adapt. People change. You can't predict anything. Take each situation as it comes.
2. Play dirty(aka be creative). Do anything to keep you going. I've been riding my bike to work every day. Today was raining. Didn't stop me. Didn't even bother with the whole rain coat thing. I actually found it more fun. Who knew a little falling water could add so much fun to a bike ride. All it cost me was a change of clothes. Good deal to me. If my mind is open, there's so many ways I can think off to get off my butt and do something.
3. Making mistakes is normal. It's typically when you haven't started anything that you think up grandiose perfect plans. Suffice to say anything you do will NEVER be your best effort. It's just too messy. Too many variables you can't account for. I would just say just get started, keep your mind open, and everything else takes care itself (habits and whatnot). As long as you personalize your journey, it should be OK. An example of personalizing for me would be my competitiveness (not to be mistaken for bad sportsmanship!). I don't like to deny that aspect of myself because it makes me happy. I typically keep tabs on various Japanese learners and try to outdo them on their progress.