failed university, feel stuck, not sure what to do next

[Zobra Buddha]

Hi guys,
I currently feel stuck.

I did 2 years of university, during this time I went through a lot of anxiety. I hated university life, I didn't like my major, went through many family problems, I found it difficult to concentrate and absorb any new information, and eventually I failed all my courses. My parents put away money for my education through the Children's education plan. I was informed that if I don't successfully finish all my classes I will lose their investment. I failed university. lost the money. disappointed myself and my family.



I spend the summer at the Vipassana Meditation Center, it really helped me let go of certain emotional issues. I feel much better about myself and others. My relationships with family has improved.

Now I feel this intense uncertainty. I am unsure of my own potential, what to do next, or what I really want. Currently I am working at a coffee shop. Its an o.k. job while studying, but I know I can do better then that. I don't like any job available for me. Everything I like requires further education. So I know that I need to go back to school. But I don't know what I am good for or even what my options are. I feel stuck. I don't want to make a choice and
then hate it, and fail again. I want to make a serious commitment and I feel uncertain about any decision.

I started researching different career options. Everything I am interested in like – forestry, conservation, art therapy, I no longer qualify for. To get into forestry I need High school level university math, chemistry and biology. I don't have these credits, so I will need to go back to high school. Right now most of the high schools are filled up and anyways I don't want to go back to high school after 2 years of university. I could get into an arts program and take psychology. But I am not allowed to go back to university for a year
and then many universities might not accept my application because of poor academic performance.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. I feel really stressed out about this. Most university applications are coming due soon, I need to choose now or I will have to wait another year. I don't want to wait another year, i want to do something other then work full time at a coffee shop.

[funchy]

Kudos to you for not giving up. Maybe that school and/or that field of study really was a terrible fit for you. The important thing is you realized the mismatch and got out before wasting any more time.

It's ok you don't know today what you want to do. You do have a few ideas which require some science classes. How about working 30-40 hours a week and doing 1-2 classes on a part time basis? This allows you to afford school and the limited # of classes prevent you from drowning. A year from now you'll have some prerequisites out of the way, you won't be in debt, and by then you'll be able to make some better decisions about your career options.

Do not feel bad for the first attempt not to work out. What is done is done. Feeling bad about this will lead into depression. Time to move on and focus on the future. I believe the important thing your parents wanted was for you to succeed. If you take a second approach to your education & career, they will still be proud.

[rosegold]

Just wondering, can you think of things you are passionate about while on your coffee job?

[WRX AJT]

Hey! Everything is going to be alright. I too failed out of college. After realizing that I was going to fail out, I went into action and checked into other local colleges that are available around my house. I ended up getting into another good college and worked my butt off. I then decided to go back to the original college I had failed out of, and after a semester I left. I left because of the stress and lack of sleep (roughly 12 hours per week). Honestly, if it wasn't for me failing out of college I wouldn't have found my passion in life. I started working on cars (my Subaru Impreza WRX) and I interned at a performance shop. Just because you failed out of college doesn't mean the world is over for you. Figure out what you want and go for it.

As of right now, I'm currently an Organization, Leadership, and Supervision major at a satellite campus of Purdue University. I'm 3 classes short of getting my Associates degree, and I'm planning to move to North Carolina to go to a college out there for Motorsport Management.

Sometimes you just have to think that although the door might be closed, there will always be another one opening for you. It did for me and I'm thankful for it.

Here is what I did:

1) Checked into all of the possible universities / colleges in my surrounding area.

2) Went to all of them and spoke to a guidance counselor to see what my options are. Not to mention, I had to kind of sell myself to show I'm capable of doing well.

3) I picked the best option for me at the time and applied to that school.

4) After getting accepted I promised myself I wouldn't fail again.

5) Kept telling myself through the rough classes that I don't wanna be a nobody, but rather a somebody!

6) Studied hard and got the grades.

The main lesson I learned was: IF YOU WANT SOMETHING BAD ENOUGH YOU'LL FIND A WAY TO ACCOMPLISH THE GOAL / OBJECTIVE!

With all of that being said, don't fret over this. Things have to get worse before they get better.

Best of luck to ya,

WRX AJT

[ginkgo]

Yes we love in a strange society. It is loaded with depressed people. For millions of years people grew up in villages. It was one big family. No need for money. Everyone looked out for each other and people did what they could to help the society to sustain itself.

Many societies are thousands of years old. America is a brand new society. This page has Advice for Teen Girls. It has a psychologist saying that we should look at our society like an anthropologist looking at a strange new society. Do not let society define you like it has your parents. Societies come and go, but you are eternal.

[PeaceCat]

Hi Zobra Buddha (cool name!)

I experienced a very similar thing. I was studying creative arts at Uni, because that was my passion throughout my teens and everyone kind of expected I would just continue doing that. However, after 2 years at Uni I started to feel anxious, depressed, de-motivated, bored etc. started failing modules and ultimately decided to quit in order to have a re-think about what to do with my life. I did intend to go back, but my life took various new directions and I ultimately found that I never needed or wanted to. I did pursue other studies, but via evening classes and home study courses which I found gave me the freedom to fill my days with other activities, such as getting on the job ladder in business admin (an area I wanted to get into) dabbling in property development projects and various other things which resonated with my values and interests.

My advice would be:

1) Think of it as more of a course correction rather than a failure – you explored one route, it didn’t work out so now you’re free to try a new one, whether that be a new University course, getting into a career via another route or just taking some time out to find yourself. I’m sure you got something of value from the studies you have completed to date, perhaps you can even get a certificate or diploma in recognition of what you’ve done so far. Either way, put what you have done so far on your resume and look to the future

2) Don’t worry about what friends and family think of all this right now, just follow your heart and do what you feel is right for you. When you get yourself back on track and doing something you enjoy, you’re friends and family will come around and be happy for you.

3) Steve’s blog has various articles about finding your values, getting your life and work to resonate with those and finding ways to do what you love, read them all! (I did and found it very helpful).

4) Don’t worry if you end up taking a year out from University, it may give you valuable time to explore new interests, earn some money, try out different kinds of jobs etc. I don’t know where you are but here in the UK (and probably other European countries) it is seen as acceptable and commonplace for students to take a year out to work, travel, “find themselves” explore other interests, take short courses etc. If you end up taking a year out and people give you a hard time, just say it’s what all the cool European kids do

I hope that helps. It may be hard, especially when friends and family are giving you a hard time, but if it helps at all, when I decided to quit Uni, my Dad was upset at first, but was happier when I got involved in new projects and got a job, happier still when my University gave me a diploma for the 2 years I had completed, and even happier still when I got back into studying (studying business management courses home study). About 4 years after that, I was established on a decent career path as a personal assistant and my Dad stopped asking me “so when are you going back to finish your degree?”. He actually told me that he thinks I’ve done very well with my life and is happy I took an unconventional path and followed my gut rather than taking the safe option and just doing what others expected of me.

Best of luck to you

[PeaceCat]

p.s. have you considered other modes of study, such as getting a degree via distance learning/correspondence courses? If university life didn't agree with you, it could mean that you're more suited to studying in a different way. Another option is to find a vocational training programme in a field that is of interest to you, where you start off in a beginner level job and gain qualifications while you work. Just a thought

[rosegold]

Ten Quick Ways to Make Money

# 10 might be best tip. Learn computer programming for free online and then take a test to get a certificate; then do some freelance coding job!

[CroMagna]

Are you aware that even Steve at first failed out of college? He then applied to another and ended up graduating in 3 freaking semesters.

[Rosie]

Hey there! Do you live in Canada? If you do, you can apply to a 2 year college program, and then once you graduate, you can get in to 2nd or third year university. pm me if you want more info..

[Jarreddo]

Actually, in America as well, if you go to a community college and get good grades, it's pretty easy to transfer to a better school or apply once you get an associate's degree. A lot of people do it.

I just dropped out of college in May and I've been using my time as wisely as possible, working on my art, building up self-discipline, and learning what I want to do with my life. I don't even plan on going back to school any time soon. But if your goals require it, then find a way to make it work. Community college, and other programs where you aren't subjected to the pressures and full-time student life of a traditional school, might be a much better fit for you.

[Zobra Buddha]

Originally Posted by Rosie

Hey there! Do you live in Canada? If you do, you can apply to a 2 year college program, and then once you graduate, you can get in to 2nd or third year university. pm me if you want more info..

Hi Rosie,

thank you for your reply. Could you tell me more about this option? It seems like something I would want to do.

Thank you,
Leela

[Zobra Buddha]

Hi PeaceCat,

thank you for your encouragement. I feel much better knowing that it is common for many students to fail and take time off.

love,
Zobra Buddha

Originally Posted by PeaceCat

Hi Zobra Buddha (cool name!)

I experienced a very similar thing. I was studying creative arts at Uni, because that was my passion throughout my teens and everyone kind of expected I would just continue doing that. However, after 2 years at Uni I started to feel anxious, depressed, de-motivated, bored etc. started failing modules and ultimately decided to quit in order to have a re-think about what to do with my life. I did intend to go back, but my life took various new directions and I ultimately found that I never needed or wanted to. I did pursue other studies, but via evening classes and home study courses which I found gave me the freedom to fill my days with other activities, such as getting on the job ladder in business admin (an area I wanted to get into) dabbling in property development projects and various other things which resonated with my values and interests.

My advice would be:

1) Think of it as more of a course correction rather than a failure – you explored one route, it didn’t work out so now you’re free to try a new one, whether that be a new University course, getting into a career via another route or just taking some time out to find yourself. I’m sure you got something of value from the studies you have completed to date, perhaps you can even get a certificate or diploma in recognition of what you’ve done so far. Either way, put what you have done so far on your resume and look to the future

2) Don’t worry about what friends and family think of all this right now, just follow your heart and do what you feel is right for you. When you get yourself back on track and doing something you enjoy, you’re friends and family will come around and be happy for you.

3) Steve’s blog has various articles about finding your values, getting your life and work to resonate with those and finding ways to do what you love, read them all! (I did and found it very helpful).

4) Don’t worry if you end up taking a year out from University, it may give you valuable time to explore new interests, earn some money, try out different kinds of jobs etc. I don’t know where you are but here in the UK (and probably other European countries) it is seen as acceptable and commonplace for students to take a year out to work, travel, “find themselves” explore other interests, take short courses etc. If you end up taking a year out and people give you a hard time, just say it’s what all the cool European kids do

I hope that helps. It may be hard, especially when friends and family are giving you a hard time, but if it helps at all, when I decided to quit Uni, my Dad was upset at first, but was happier when I got involved in new projects and got a job, happier still when my University gave me a diploma for the 2 years I had completed, and even happier still when I got back into studying (studying business management courses home study). About 4 years after that, I was established on a decent career path as a personal assistant and my Dad stopped asking me “so when are you going back to finish your degree?”. He actually told me that he thinks I’ve done very well with my life and is happy I took an unconventional path and followed my gut rather than taking the safe option and just doing what others expected of me.

Best of luck to you

[Zobra Buddha]

thank you for your encouragement~!

Originally Posted by funchy

Kudos to you for not giving up. Maybe that school and/or that field of study really was a terrible fit for you. The important thing is you realized the mismatch and got out before wasting any more time.

It's ok you don't know today what you want to do. You do have a few ideas which require some science classes. How about working 30-40 hours a week and doing 1-2 classes on a part time basis? This allows you to afford school and the limited # of classes prevent you from drowning. A year from now you'll have some prerequisites out of the way, you won't be in debt, and by then you'll be able to make some better decisions about your career options.

Do not feel bad for the first attempt not to work out. What is done is done. Feeling bad about this will lead into depression. Time to move on and focus on the future. I believe the important thing your parents wanted was for you to succeed. If you take a second approach to your education & career, they will still be proud.

[Zobra Buddha]

again, thaks WRX AJT.

sometimes all you need is a bit of encouragement and support.

love,
ZObra Buddha

Originally Posted by [CENTER

WRX AJT[/CENTER];263001]Hey! Everything is going to be alright. I too failed out of college. After realizing that I was going to fail out, I went into action and checked into other local colleges that are available around my house. I ended up getting into another good college and worked my butt off. I then decided to go back to the original college I had failed out of, and after a semester I left. I left because of the stress and lack of sleep (roughly 12 hours per week). Honestly, if it wasn't for me failing out of college I wouldn't have found my passion in life. I started working on cars (my Subaru Impreza WRX) and I interned at a performance shop. Just because you failed out of college doesn't mean the world is over for you. Figure out what you want and go for it.

As of right now, I'm currently an Organization, Leadership, and Supervision major at a satellite campus of Purdue University. I'm 3 classes short of getting my Associates degree, and I'm planning to move to North Carolina to go to a college out there for Motorsport Management.

Sometimes you just have to think that although the door might be closed, there will always be another one opening for you. It did for me and I'm thankful for it.

Here is what I did:

1) Checked into all of the possible universities / colleges in my surrounding area.

2) Went to all of them and spoke to a guidance counselor to see what my options are. Not to mention, I had to kind of sell myself to show I'm capable of doing well.

3) I picked the best option for me at the time and applied to that school.

4) After getting accepted I promised myself I wouldn't fail again.

5) Kept telling myself through the rough classes that I don't wanna be a nobody, but rather a somebody!

6) Studied hard and got the grades.

The main lesson I learned was: IF YOU WANT SOMETHING BAD ENOUGH YOU'LL FIND A WAY TO ACCOMPLISH THE GOAL / OBJECTIVE!

With all of that being said, don't fret over this. Things have to get worse before they get better.

Best of luck to ya,

WRX AJT

[Throwback24]

Please go back to high school and take University level Math and Chemistry. I am! I believe in you.