Fans Of Eckhart Tolle...Question

[jbsmith]

For any of you who have read or studied Eckhart Tolle's material - especially his latest A New Earth - Awakening To Your Life's Purpose, I have a question.

First, in the reading the book twice, I certainly see something interesting and powerful in the concept that much of what we do is ego driven and that we must spend a good deal of time examining and sometimes battling our behaviors and surface thoughts as they are guided by ego instead of our inner purpose.

His main thesis though is that striving is entirely ego driven except when it is to work toward living in the moment - a large part of which requires acceptance of anything that happens to us.

In fact, he argues that there are only 3 states or modalities that are in tune with our purpose - acceptance, enjoyment and enthusiasm.

I certainly get enjoyment and enthusiasm - it makes total sense to me that when we are in these states we are more in harmony with our inner purpose and the universe.

However, the concept of accceptance is one I struggle with. If we were to only accept everything that happened to us we would never improve or change. For it is the lack of acceptance that leads to progress, learning, and improvements in our lives.

If you are unhappy with your job, you should just accept it rather than try and improve? That doesn't make any sense to me?

Anyone else have a different interpretation?

Jeff

[The David]

I have read both of Tolle's books, although it's been about a year or so since my last read. I should give them another look soon.

I think much of what Tolle, and other New-Agey writers who promote 'acceptance' are getting at is kind of like pro-activity vs. re-activity. Tolle does tend to venture into what could be described as just plain apathy, and I'm not claiming to agree with everything he says. I personally don't like his style, although I like his ideas and find his books a good addition to my personal library.

Pro-activity would be looking for a better job. Reactivity would be not liking your job while you still have it. I accept that I'm a University student and I like being one, but heck, I'm not shelling out 10 grand every year for the rest of my life. It's just until graduation. Reactivity would be resenting your job, not trying to interpret it positively. I was probably using this approach when I transferred schools twice.

Reactivity is about judging something as negative. Pro-activity is about always looking for a way to promote something good. Unfortunately, Tolle does not seem to emphasize either, and sometimes ends up in the comfortable medium of 'inactivity'.

And for someone who drinks a lot of coffee, he looks pretty stoned.

[Ecce Homo]

Originally Posted by jbsmith

For it is the lack of acceptance that leads to progress, learning, and improvements in our lives.

Is that true? Are you sure that it is the lack of acceptance that leads to progress?

I’m no Tolle expert, but I have read his books several times each, and I’m fairly sure (without having the books in front of me mind you) that this is not what he is saying. Acceptance does not equal “no action”. I think he uses the example of being stuck in the mud in The Power of Now so lets go with it. If you find yourself stuck in the mud, it would be insane to internally resist the reality you are in right now. The reality of the now moment is, you’re stuck in the mud. Mentally arguing with your situation, judging it, condemning it, etc, is simply not efficient because that does nothing to alter your “stuck in the mud” status. Accepting it, embracing the now, is efficient. It leaves with a clear mind and only a clear mind is capable of taking truly clear action. From that clarity, you see exactly what it is you need to do to remove yourself from the mud hole.

[Dharma]

Eckhart didn't go over this in A New Earth? It's been a while since I've read it.

Originally Posted by jbsmith

If we were to only accept everything that happened to us we would never improve or change.

That's your mind talking. It can't figure out how accepting what is does anything. Actually accepting what is would bring about change so fast and so easy, that you wouldn't be able to stand it.

Resistance to what is slows change down and inserts a lot of negativity into life.

Let's say I'm a computer programmer and the company I work for instituted a bunch of new security rules that I now have to program around and I cannot get my job done on time because of the extra coding and testing I need to do.

(1) I can ♥♥♥♥♥ about it, say these new rules are stupid, get all tied in knots internally, and get angry and pressurized because things SHOULD BE different. I go down the hall and complain to my boss and coworkers that Security just screwed up my project.

(2) Or I can be in the moment and practice acceptance: There are new security rules and I think this will throw off my schedule. That's it. That's acceptance. No resistance, no pressurization, no fighting with my expectations and how the company is not living up to my standards...

In #1 I have all this drama and resistance built up... does it do anything for me? Does it solve the problem? No, it stresses me out and I'm filling my space with lots of drama and thought.

In #2, I'm at the same moment, but there's no drama in my space, there's very little thought going on too. Why is that special? What does that do for me?

Consciousness is very courteous. It will not bust-in and take over the situation at hand. It will let your logical mind resist, complain, worry, ruminate, etc. until it's had its fill or you're dead, which ever comes first. Your consciousness, which brings lots of lightness, peace and ease into you life, waits for the space to be open so it can evolve your current experience. Resisting what is closes down that space. You gotta do things the hard way, with lots of effort. Sometimes the situation will never evolve into something else because your resistance is so intense.

Acceptance of the moment allows what you might call 'magic' to enter into your life. The synchronicities will be pretty crazy and your mind won't be able to grasp how it all came together. You may still not be happy about the situation but you will feel peace inside. You know everything is ok and you keep moving.

Change inspired by the consciousness will be better than anything the mind will think up while it's harboring a lot of resistance. (Consciousness may use the mind in it's solution too. But if the mind's too busy grumbling it won't get the message.) The mind has to work with what it has in the physical dimension, the consciousness creates the physical dimension. Which do you want to work with?

[Niki]

Originally Posted by Dharma

(1) I can ♥♥♥♥♥ about it, say these new rules are stupid, get all tied in knots internally, and get angry and pressurized because things SHOULD BE different. I go down the hall and complain to my boss and coworkers that Security just screwed up my project.

(2) Or I can be in the moment and practice acceptance: There are new security rules and I think this will throw off my schedule. That's it. That's acceptance. No resistance, no pressurization, no fighting with my expectations and how the company is not living up to my standards...

In #1 I have all this drama and resistance built up... does it do anything for me? Does it solve the problem? No, it stresses me out and I'm filling my space with lots of drama and thought.

In #2, I'm at the same moment, but there's no drama in my space, there's very little thought going on too. Why is that special? What does that do for me?

"Practicing acceptance" is not "better" than "having this drama and resistance built up". If you let yourself build up pressure your pushing your treshold, and then you can enjoy 2 IMO. Nobody has walked a 100 mile without stepping the the first 99 of it. This belief may be clashing with your belief, but just wanted to give another viewpoint.

[Brutha]

"Practicing acceptance" is not "better" than "having this drama and resistance built up". If you let yourself build up pressure your pushing your treshold, and then you can enjoy 2 IMO. Nobody has walked a 100 mile without stepping the the first 99 of it.

Why do you think that acceptance doesn't lead you to running the 100 miles?
If you simply run and accept all the feedback that your body is given you while keeping on running I don't see how that results in less results?

In addition most important things don't have linear progressions where tresholds make conceptually sense.
Either you have the creative idea that solves your problem or you don't.
Having a lot of internal tension reduce the scope in which you notice things.

[daredevil83]

Originally Posted by jbsmith

For it is the lack of acceptance that leads to progress, learning, and improvements in our lives.

If you are unhappy with your job, you should just accept it rather than try and improve? That doesn't make any sense to me?

Anyone else have a different interpretation?

Jeff

For me, the real acceptance is the first step to any change.
How can I change if I deny (even if I'm not aware of it) that I have a problem with something? I have to admit, that something REALLY goes wrong, then the change is (often - not always) rather simple and painless.

When you think about improvements, you may even not notice, what happen to you NOW - because your mind is in future - so you live in imagined world. How can you accept reality?

For me, the best path is balance - some observation, and some improvements. But the observation is first.

[BillyBlanks24]

When I first started reading Eckharts books my mind was quite scared of accepting situations and doing nothing. It asked "but if I do nothing and accept, I wont become more, bigger, better, more enhanced". That was simply the ego talking. As I watched my mind more, I could see it often made an enemy of situations. In this state my work was inneffective.

As I began to focus on the now and offer no resistance my life changed. Situations become favourable and so little effort is needed compared to before. To those who think they're minds have the solution to every problem, just "try" eckharts teaching for a while, say 6 months. If it doesnt work, go back to the mind

[Niki]

Originally Posted by Brutha

Why do you think that acceptance doesn't lead you to running the 100 miles?
If you simply run and accept all the feedback that your body is given you while keeping on running I don't see how that results in less results?

In addition most important things don't have linear progressions where tresholds make conceptually sense.
Either you have the creative idea that solves your problem or you don't.
Having a lot of internal tension reduce the scope in which you notice things.

Just wanted to point out that acceptance is the result of non-acceptance eventually. Like you could accept that my opinion was different, but you didn't , you first had to let me know your opinion.

[lasti]

Originally Posted by jbsmith

However, the concept of accceptance is one I struggle with. If we were to only accept everything that happened to us we would never improve or change. For it is the lack of acceptance that leads to progress, learning, and improvements in our lives.

If you are unhappy with your job, you should just accept it rather than try and improve? That doesn't make any sense to me?

Anyone else have a different interpretation?

No, you don't have to accept your life situation as you describe it. Acceptance means accepting THIS moment. If you don't want to accept your life situation, do something against it. But while you're doing something against it, accept the moment, be in the now.
Accepting the moment doesn't mean anything else than to stop to escape from the now .

[Ecce Homo]

Originally Posted by Niki

"Practicing acceptance" is not "better" than "having this drama and resistance built up". If you let yourself build up pressure your pushing your treshold, and then you can enjoy 2 IMO. Nobody has walked a 100 mile without stepping the the first 99 of it. This belief may be clashing with your belief, but just wanted to give another viewpoint.

True. Acceptance is not better than resistance. I guess it depends on what someone really wants to experience. If a person gets a thrill out of stress, anxiety, anger, frustration, depression, and general high drama, then resistance is better. If a person wishes to feel more peaceful, joyful, and generally happy, then acceptance is better.

It's a valid point, IMHO. Who says everyone should feel joy and peace and gratitude on a regular basis, while raising children, or doing their job, or walking 100 miles? Clarity is most definitely not a requirement for living, is it? That's why I love freedom!

[Dannyboy1]

Originally Posted by Ecce Homo

True. Acceptance is not better than resistance. I guess it depends on what someone really wants to experience. If a person gets a thrill out of stress, anxiety, anger, frustration, depression, and general high drama, then resistance is better. If a person wishes to feel more peaceful, joyful, and generally happy, then acceptance is better.

Anger is caused by dissatisfaction. When someone says someone "enjoys" drama in their life, it's a form of sarcasm. The ego is what enjoys the "drama" because it is strengthened by it. Anyone who believes they "enjoy" resistance is controlled by the ego and probably unaware of who they really are.

Acceptance is the fast track to productivity and success. The sooner we accept what is, the sooner we can be focused on the now and what can be done about it. Resistance is the cause of "spinning your wheels" and only impedes true progress. Acceptance is saying, "Let go of what you think SHOULD be and realize what is. Do not argue with yourself. Accept it and decide how to handle it now."

[Ecce Homo]

Originally Posted by Dannyboy1

Anger is caused by dissatisfaction. When someone says someone "enjoys" drama in their life, it's a form of sarcasm. The ego is what enjoys the "drama" because it is strengthened by it. Anyone who believes they "enjoy" resistance is controlled by the ego and probably unaware of who they really are.

Acceptance is the fast track to productivity and success. The sooner we accept what is, the sooner we can be focused on the now and what can be done about it. Resistance is the cause of "spinning your wheels" and only impedes true progress. Acceptance is saying, "Let go of what you think SHOULD be and realize what is. Do not argue with yourself. Accept it and decide how to handle it now."

How can someone enjoy anger? I imagine the same way someone can enjoy spicy food or climbing mountains or jumping out of airplanes. I imagine they enjoy the feel of their heart racing, the blood pumping furiously through their veins, and the adrenaline rush. I imagine it’s kind of like a high. I keep saying I imagine because I personally don’t prefer to consistently feel negative emotions or drama or spicy foods. I respect those who do. I’m pleased that those who enjoy that kind of thing have the freedom to experience it, because that also means I have the freedom to experience the opposite. I love that we all have perfectly valid options!

And no, I was not being sarcastic. I came very close to actually typing “I am not being sarcastic” in that last post, but decided not to. I suspected someone would hear what I was saying as sarcasm and hence the never used disclaimer. It's all good!

[Dannyboy1]

Originally Posted by Ecce Homo

How can someone enjoy anger? I imagine the same way someone can enjoy spicy food or climbing mountains or jumping out of airplanes. I imagine they enjoy the feel of their heart racing, the blood pumping furiously through their veins, and the adrenaline rush. I imagine it’s kind of like a high. I keep saying I imagine because I personally don’t prefer to consistently feel negative emotions or drama or spicy foods. I respect those who do. I’m pleased that those who enjoy that kind of thing have the freedom to experience it, because that also means I have the freedom to experience the opposite. I love that we all have perfectly valid options!

And no, I was not being sarcastic. I came very close to actually typing “I am not being sarcastic” in that last post, but decided not to. I suspected someone would hear what I was saying as sarcasm and hence the never used disclaimer. It's all good!

I wasn't looking for an answer. I was giving an answer to my own question. I was pointing out that you can't really "love" anger or "drama". Only the ego can. Also, I wasn't suggesting that you were sarcastic. I was saying there is an innate sarcasm in the saying, "They love drama in their life."

All good things.

[Ecce Homo]

Originally Posted by Dannyboy1

All good things.

(Cue the violin...) Curse me and my literal mind!!! Whatever shall I do?

[Cultivate]

I don't think accepting means you can't "improve" your life. It doesn't have to be an apathetic acceptance, or 'giving up' on improving. Just accept your real situation - aka you don't have groceries. Stop letting your mind treat this as a terrible thing and just accept that that is your situation. Be aware of your true situation. Obviously you're going to go buy groceries, so don't stress and wish, just say "oh, i need to buy groceries" then get back to the present moment of accepting that you don't have groceries RIGHT NOW. After you get the groceries you have them again.

Obviously you're going to need to 'not accept' things temporarily. You're going to need to say that you need to buy groceries and that your current state is unacceptable. But when you're done planning how to change your situation THEN you can go back to accepting the situation and just "being in the now" because further planning will only add stress and mental chatter. This is "using your mind" appropriately and in a creative and beneficial manner rather than using it to bring stress and worry into your life.

Thats my interpretation, I hope it helped.

[jbsmith]

Thanks everyone - the debate is helping me work through this...and certainly backs up the confusion I had in my mind after reading his books.

I understand the need to "recognize" what is going on in your life, I guess the issue I have is that by acceptance (and Tolle makes it very clear through his books that we shouldn't be moving beyond the present moment), I can't see how any progress gets made.

In any case, I'm certainly giving it a try as I do have a belief that new energy paths are opened up if we stop trying and pushing so damned hard...just haven't reached the point of putting everything in the hands of universe - I still like to think there is a pain versus pleasure influence that has led to positive progress in the world.

Jeff

[Cultivate]

In the audiobook that I listened to, Eckhart DID say that there were times were you had to, out of pure necessity, move out of the present moment to manage your life. I remember him saying that this is the appropriate use of the mind rather than the constant commentary and criticism of the present situation. He never said that the mind was useless and that you had to always be in the present. He said that your mind should be a tool that you use when you have to, but that it shouldn't always be in use. So how I interpret it is that recognizing that something needs to be done and planning how it will be done must happen to survive, but that after your mind has processed the problem and created a solution you shouldn't allow your mind to continue wandering over the situation. The idea is to remove redundant thoughts and useless thoughts. If you MUST think something, or plan something, well, you must, right?

[Acting Like Godot]

Originally Posted by jbsmith

I guess the issue I have is that by acceptance (and Tolle makes it very clear through his books that we shouldn't be moving beyond the present moment), I can't see how any progress gets made.

Acceptance doesn't mean you agree to a bad situation.

Acceptance means that you face up to the fact that you have a bad situation; you acknowledge that this is your "now". So you then proceed to take whatever action you need to take to fix the problem; and as you take your action, you focus fully on your action.

That's all.

[ginkgo]

Lots of people have trouble understanding what Tolle means so it must be partly his fault. In The Power of Now, he talks about surrender and people go nuts (I can tell by the questions). He is talking about St Francis stuff. "God grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change, the courage to change the things that I can change and the wisdom to know the difference." I go to a Tolle forum sometimes.

LRH says "Try to control what you can control and do not try to control what you cannot control." Tolle is writing books (new one out in Oct/2008) and improving things. Acceptence does not mean to have no security in airports. But it means to accept what cannot be changed. So you accept 9/11 instead of being upset about it. If your legs get cut off, it does not mean that you do not get fake legs. It means that you accept that you do not have your own legs anymore.

Then there is the big one. How can you be happy if you are always afraid? You cannot be. Since you cannot change it, accept that someday you will die and be dead. Acceptance does not mean that you do not vote or try to get Steve Pavlina elected as president. It means that when McCain is elected president, accept that you cannot do anythng about it for 4 years. To be happy, you have to be tranquil and have peace of mind. That means to accept things as they are right now. Maybe you will be president someday. He is not saying, do not try. He is saying that you accept that Bush is president right now. Finding Happiness.

[Dannyboy1]

Originally Posted by Cultivate

In the audiobook that I listened to, Eckhart DID say that there were times were you had to, out of pure necessity, move out of the present moment to manage your life. I remember him saying that this is the appropriate use of the mind rather than the constant commentary and criticism of the present situation. He never said that the mind was useless and that you had to always be in the present. He said that your mind should be a tool that you use when you have to, but that it shouldn't always be in use. So how I interpret it is that recognizing that something needs to be done and planning how it will be done must happen to survive, but that after your mind has processed the problem and created a solution you shouldn't allow your mind to continue wandering over the situation. The idea is to remove redundant thoughts and useless thoughts. If you MUST think something, or plan something, well, you must, right?

I believe when you plan, you can still be in the now. You're thinking of the future for the planning you are focusing on now. You're still in the now as long as you are glimpsing into the future purely for planning. The problem occurs when you forget you're planning and the glimpsing leads to an hour long trip where you forget what you're doing.

[metamorph]

Originally Posted by jbsmith

For any of you who have read or studied Eckhart Tolle's material - especially his latest A New Earth - Awakening To Your Life's Purpose, I have a question.

First, in the reading the book twice, I certainly see something interesting and powerful in the concept that much of what we do is ego driven and that we must spend a good deal of time examining and sometimes battling our behaviors and surface thoughts as they are guided by ego instead of our inner purpose.

His main thesis though is that striving is entirely ego driven except when it is to work toward living in the moment - a large part of which requires acceptance of anything that happens to us.

In fact, he argues that there are only 3 states or modalities that are in tune with our purpose - acceptance, enjoyment and enthusiasm.

I certainly get enjoyment and enthusiasm - it makes total sense to me that when we are in these states we are more in harmony with our inner purpose and the universe.

However, the concept of accceptance is one I struggle with. If we were to only accept everything that happened to us we would never improve or change. For it is the lack of acceptance that leads to progress, learning, and improvements in our lives.

If you are unhappy with your job, you should just accept it rather than try and improve? That doesn't make any sense to me?

Anyone else have a different interpretation?

Jeff

Check out the webcast with oprah (free, on her website). There are people interviewing him who ask your and some other interesting questions. Definitely worth it!

Acceptance is really nothing "new agey" but the core principle of Buddhist and some other Eastern religious ideas. Makes perfect sense to me and it does enrich my life. And you can live the duality of acceptance and taking accountability for your life. No problem. Enjoy the webcast

[Notsupplied]

This quote may be relevant?

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

[catalyst]

Good question. I wondered the same thing to myself as I read that part of the book, but as some of the others have said, I think he means to accept being in the present moment. Not to stop having any desire to change or to become complacent. I recall he says something along the lines of: internal awareness of the present moment is primary and your life situation is secondary. Btw, I'm new to ET, I just read both of his books a few times each in the past week or so.

I interpret his message as not to resist what you cannot change (past or future). Once you accept NOW, that stress and tension from the resistance should dissipate. At that point, you are better aware of what needs to be done. You are at a higher state of consciousness and intelligence.

In my case, I was able to directly apply it to my situation. I've had a hard time accepting that my ten year relationship with my ex was over. In my head, the drama just kept playing on repeat. I was this heart broken sap who just couldn't get over her. I resisted so strongly inside, not only because I loved her, but because I let her define my ego. Though there is nothing I could do to get her back, I was fixated on our memories and scenarios of what I could have done to change the situation. Fantasies of us getting back together, and painful thoughts of her with someone else.

I had to accept NOW. I can't change the past. I accept that I was betrayed. I accept that I bear some responsibility. I accept that I'm emotionally wounded. Once I did that, I recognized that my ego is what wasn't letting go (why wasn't I good enough?). I could see that I did love her, and after all that happened, I can forgive her because I know that she is not so different from me.

Sure there are days where I recycle my feelings, but I am more aware so I can often catch myself when I start letting my mind warp me back into time. What I thought of as merely 'suffering' is turning out to be one of the most important lessons in my life.

[drama07]

bump!

Thank you Tolle for a modernized teaching of ancient times.

It's clear our generation is completely dysfunctional.

[supertom]

So what is our life purpose according to tolle?

[Angela]

Originally Posted by supertom

So what is our life purpose according to tolle?

To awaken -- to be present in this moment, which is all we've got.

[supertom]

dont you have a watch that says "now" on it??

[supertom]

When you know your life purpose, its seems your in the now naturally, i guess cause your life isnt about "time" anymore

[Ralph]

Originally Posted by jbsmith

If you are unhappy with your job, you should just accept it rather than try and improve? That doesn't make any sense to me?

Anyone else have a different interpretation?

Jeff

It's easy Accept it and then try to improve it. Take action from the level of acceptance, not from the level of denial. Improve what is not because you resist it, but because you accept your power change it as well.