Huge conflict of interest and reality

[shiguldo]

Hello,

This is my first post but I'm so distressed that I have to lay out my problems right away so please pardon me.

I'm currently 28 years old with great academic record (went to Johns Hopkins, and also have masters degree in Public Health). So naturally people all expected me to go into the field of science for work. However, this was my biggest mistake because I mainly chose this field to go into medicine.

Not trying to be stereotypical but my parents are asian and they all typically expect their kids to go med or a field with high paying stable job.

Unfortunately or (fortunately?) while finishing my graduate study, I realized my true passion is in business using what I learned in the science degree and not being a doctor.

Instead of being a researcher, I wanted to be working on the other side marketing and selling whatever the research produces. I forced myself to work in lab jobs but realized I hated it. It felt like oil and water to me. Even though I can probably develop the right skills for those jobs, I felt empty and unfulfilled. I also didn't have the best luck as I was stuck with terrible abusive boss or with dead end jobs so now I ended up quitting them.

In the meantime I have been doing a part time work in tutoring Japanese and I loved it. Though I liked teaching, the idea of being independent while finding my own clients, sending other tutors to assist me excited me. I truly felt alive again.

My mom totally disagrees. She tolerated my 2 months out of job for this but now insist that if I don't find a job right away, my future is doomed. I realize being out of job for too long will jeopardize my career especially at my age.

I know this is a career problem. I currently lack the time and money to just restart in a profession that I relatively enjoy (like teaching). However, it is the business part that truly excited me.

What am I to do? I originally thought of doing part time tutoring for other people to make ends meet until my independent business will take off but my time is real limited. I'm pressured to find a full time job ASAP.

I appreciate any advice.

Thanks

[Peek]

Hi Shiguldo,

See how you can do both, in a part time way.
You business can be great in the evening or weekends and the make-mom-happy one in a 3 or 4 days per week job.

By the way, do not blame your mom or parents, they mean well. And for what I learned from Asian parents: you have to take care of them one day. They want you to do well in your job, so you can provide them good care when they need it in the future.
So maybe if you can show a plan how you provide them a good pension plan, they can see your point too.

Take care,

Peek

[uberinquisitive]

I suggest you read this article about going from job to career you love.

[shiguldo]

Peek and uber.

Thank you so much for the reply.
My current quick gap solution was to find a part time tutoring job since it pays a lot at the same time and time is flexible.

The place where I have conflict with is my mom thinks this will destroy my resume and my chance to return to a full time "regular" job.

As for tutoring part time, this may lead to instructor level and so on if I wanted to pursue a career out of it insead. However I think my mom is worried that if I wanted to go back to a 9-5 job or to my science job, I have no chance left.

[SaraLee]

Originally Posted by shiguldo

The place where I have conflict with is my mom thinks this will destroy my resume and my chance to return to a full time "regular" job.

Parents often mean well but sometimes don't consider the desires of their children, for reasons based on their own ideals and fear. You are doing well so keep faith in yourself because you know what you want and are working towards your ultimate goal. Your mom may not come around or fully understand what is best for you right now, which is why she attempts to put stumbling blocks in your mind and all you may be able to do for her right now is to reassure her that you know what is best for yourself and continue on your own path.

[uberinquisitive]

Hmmm...sounds like your dream career is to do front-end work in the medical field (interacting with customers, sales, marketing).

The job you trained for, the job your mom wants you to go back to, sounds like the back-end. Which is the research, behind-the-doors aspect.

First of all, did I describe this correctly? if a genie came out and said, "I will grant you your ideal job with a snap of my fingers" then what would that job look like? What would a typical day look like?

Let's brainstorm!

P.S. I'm also Asian, and my mom also used to nag about the entire job thing.

Realize this: your mom's mentality (as my mom's used to be) is stuck back in East Asia, 20 years back. A lot of Asian parents don't realize that the economy has been in transition for about 10 years now.

Your mom means well - but would you listen to the fears and advice of someone who is telling you antiquated information? It's like remaining scared of Communists because someone tells you that the Soviet Union is enemy #1 to the West.

P.P.S. I've been in the workforce for many years. And gaps in your resume are totally fine, as long as you can explain them. You'll have to start more entry-level after an extended absence from the workforce - but you're more entry-level anyways, so there isn't a big difference.

[shiguldo]

See how you can do both, in a part time way.
You business can be great in the evening or weekends and the make-mom-happy one in a 3 or 4 days per week job.

Sara, This is what I've been thinking of doing and where my mom have a major problem with. 3-4 days/week job is most likely a part time job (I have yet seen full time jobs offer that much flexibility. ) and as uberinquisitive implied, I think Asian parent's main concern is on jobs that doesn't offer benefits, long term stability, and the favorite 6 figure income.

Yes, I agree with uber with the dream job being more front ended. If I have to choose between the two, I probably would enjoy being the one interacting with customers more than developing products behind closed doors. Like a lot of people, I'm striving to start business while specializing in the front end area (marketing/sales/etc) but my education skews me to the back end (R&D, Quality).

I figure I can try to find an entry level into the Front End jobs to start myself or look for venues that would help me launch a business.

I'm just tired of wasting my last 2 precious year doing a job that I hate and not really able to build a career as a backup to lean on while I try to move forward with my goal.

Should I try to look for a career counselor? Thanks ^^;

[Brutha]

Have you thought about applying in a consulting agency like McKinsey?
As far as I know they want people who are generally highly skilled.

[frankmylove]

Maybe sometimes treasure what we have got is more important. Why not try to cultivate your interest in the field you are working.

[shiguldo]

frankmylove Maybe sometimes treasure what we have got is more important. Why not try to cultivate your interest in the field you are working.

I have tried. Since I graduated grad school at age 24, I've spent 4 years ish working on jobs related in the field I originally studied and it has only made me miserable. I think my problem is my original study (biology-science) was originally meant for me to go to med school and not for job. Since I changed my mind with the medical field, the jobs available are totally not what I wanted to do.


Consulting.. no I haven't considered that yet. Thank you for the suggestion. I also have a background in nutrition and done similar kind of work so that might be another option.

[uberinquisitive]

Your science/medical background and extroverted interests make you an IDEAL candidate to be a sales rep at a large pharmaceutical company. (I used to work in corporate sales - and pharma companies have mutliple orgasms when they find a sales person with a medical background).

Corporate sales is an incredible field - your income is unlimited, the contacts/network you make are invaluable, and the work experience is challenging but exciting.

I can wax poetic about the beauty of corporate sales for hours - especially because you get the best of the entrepreneurial world and corporate world, mixed into one package.

The only possible downside - it takes about 3 years to build a decent pipeline of customers. Most people give up just when things are about to turn (such a shame!).

Those who have been in corporate sales for 5 or more years are usually amongst the best paid people in the company. Most of their time is spent getting to know potential clients - if you like being around people, then you will LOVE sales. You meet a wider circle of people than the average person, and you get to expense client entertainment (oh yea!).

Pfizer, Astra Zeneca, Eli Lily - a strong cover letter and resume to their HR department may land you a job interview.

Of course, you can also do your side business while working in sales. In fact, if you move into consulting later on - you will be doubly prepared.

Just an idea.

[shiguldo]

Uberinquisitive and others,

Thanks for sharing your experience and thoughtful insight.

I now have a TIME SENSITIVE dilemna since I last posted. 3 hours from now, I'll be talking to a business contact of my brother who wants to meet with me for a deal.

This is totally unexpected and I have very little time to gather my thoughts...
Last time the same person wanted to talk to me to strike a similar deal by making me work as a salesman doing cold calls with 100% commission system for a total start-up.

Now she's targeting the herbal market with Asian medicine and wants me to help with marketing because she heard I was looking to get my license as a dietitian.

She's offering room/board + tuition fee in exchange with help in marketing.

Note: I have no experience in both. We're going to talk for more information and I'm sure she's expecting to hear what I have to say...

My mind is in shambles as I'm totally ambushed.. The deal sounds nice but this sounds like a huge commitment for all that she's offering.

I'm definitely going to just listen more and ask her to give me time to think it over.

I know its such short notice but if anybody knows how to react to this, I'd be really grateful.

[uberinquisitive]

Originally Posted by shiguldo

Last time the same person wanted to talk to me to strike a similar deal by making me work as a salesman doing cold calls with 100% commission system for a total start-up.

She's offering room/board + tuition fee in exchange with help in marketing.

This sounds like a multi-level marketing scam.

[shiguldo]

Originally Posted by uberinquisitive

This sounds like a multi-level marketing scam.

lol, from the way I described it, it sure sounds like it.
I've actually been semi scammed by one before but I'll give this person a benefit of the doubt because she really has run several successful business in the past such as a sports center in my vicinity.

She did come up with some funny business program that didn't take off but she personally worked with my brother after hiring him as her graphic designer.

That is why I'm willing to at least listen to her explain.

Again, my relatives are all pushing me for this as expected. That "I should take the offer and try to apply to the school near her provided room." Its her vacation home and I think she intends to use that as my compensation..

The problem is that it is in the middle of nowhere. "I live in California by the way". This place is a quaint vacation villa 2 hours between San Francisco and LA.

Ok, time to go soon. Thank you very much for responding. Uber