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Personal Effectiveness Goals, productivity, time management, motivation, self-discipline, overcoming procrastination, habits, organizing, problem-solving, decision-making, intelligence

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Old 04-14-2008, 02:10 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Choose the Obvious Route

Ol' Stevie once said that one of the big problems with society today is the constant sidestepping around issues. 'I want to be thin', ergo I must consume an abundant supply of diet pills! No. You must stop eating. 'I want to be smart', ergo I must listen to audiobooks in my sleep. No. You must study. 'I want a girlfriend' ergo, I must engage in several months of social rigmarole in order to get to know one well enough to date. No. You need to ASK!

My latest idea, a stroke of sheer brilliance, takes the last item on the list above; namely, a girlfriend. I don't have one, and I don't really have any medium available to me to make it easier to get to know girls all that well. I'm homeschooled, and I have a lot of siblings. Pretty much the only time I get out of the house is once a week to hang out at the mall all day.

The mall? Could I find a girlfriend there? Nah, I don't know any of them, and how would I get to know them? Wait, isn't the purpose of a date to get to know a girl. I was reminded on Steve's post, and an idea struck me. Why not choose the obvious route? Ask a girl out.

To sum up, next Saturday I'm going to go to the mall and ask a girl out. I usually wouldn't do this. I'm a bit introverted, and it scares me to talk to someone, especially someone I don't know at all, but I have to get around this, and I figure a first date is never perfect. I just want to get to know a nice girl.

Any tips, tricks, and observations from old pros? I don't want to freak them out, so maybe drop me some lines to work with. What should I do when a girl says yes? Movie? Coffee? Food? Arcade?

PS: I'm sixteen BTW, just in case you guys thought I was thirty.
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Old 04-14-2008, 07:03 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dinc View Post
Ol' Stevie once said that one of the big problems with society today is the constant sidestepping around issues. 'I want to be thin', ergo I must consume an abundant supply of diet pills! No. You must stop eating. 'I want to be smart', ergo I must listen to audiobooks in my sleep. No. You must study. 'I want a girlfriend' ergo, I must engage in several months of social rigmarole in order to get to know one well enough to date. No. You need to ASK!

My latest idea, a stroke of sheer brilliance, takes the last item on the list above; namely, a girlfriend. I don't have one, and I don't really have any medium available to me to make it easier to get to know girls all that well. I'm homeschooled, and I have a lot of siblings. Pretty much the only time I get out of the house is once a week to hang out at the mall all day.

The mall? Could I find a girlfriend there? Nah, I don't know any of them, and how would I get to know them? Wait, isn't the purpose of a date to get to know a girl. I was reminded on Steve's post, and an idea struck me. Why not choose the obvious route? Ask a girl out.

To sum up, next Saturday I'm going to go to the mall and ask a girl out. I usually wouldn't do this. I'm a bit introverted, and it scares me to talk to someone, especially someone I don't know at all, but I have to get around this, and I figure a first date is never perfect. I just want to get to know a nice girl.

Any tips, tricks, and observations from old pros? I don't want to freak them out, so maybe drop me some lines to work with. What should I do when a girl says yes? Movie? Coffee? Food? Arcade?

PS: I'm sixteen BTW, just in case you guys thought I was thirty.
Good post, except the last line you dog, I'm 40

And to the point. Yes, take action. But be yourself. Look at a prospective date as someone who you feel you can have an interesting time with, not just as an object of attractiveness.
Attraction is important obviously from the other persons perspective and normally might be a make or break for you, however it is only part of it.

People like to be complemented but not flattered. People like manners but not superficiality.

But always be yourself.
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Old 04-17-2008, 05:58 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Apart from picking up girls at the mall, if getting to know people is your main objective, have you thought about other solutions? For example, you say that you're home-schooled. Maybe you could consider attending your local school instead - plenty of options for socialising. You could even join groups in your area that match your interests (say music, art). I don't know many places that don't have something like this.

Also, obviously you have internet access, what about networking sites like myspace and facebook, or even online dating/chat sites?

I don't know where you're from or your exact circumstances, but to be honest if I was in the mall and some guy I've never met before came up and asked me on a date, I'd think it was rather odd.
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