How to change a bad habit

[Stephen]

I was thinking and reading about this recently and came across a simple analogy which suddenly clarified things for me on how to change a bad habit into a good one. (the good and bad being subjective of course)

Think of a habit as a steam which finds the shortest route possible always (gravity allowed for)
The habit is the stream. Over time doing anything consistently will cut a deep gorge into your psyche, just as a steam cuts into even the deepest rock over time to find its way.
This is how powerful habits become.
To change a deeply ingrained habit, you must take steps to divert the stream.
Just as you would on diverting a real stream, you must help to change the flow of water initially be adopting a new route. On a stream you might dam it. On a habit you would consciously form a new habit.

But here's the crux. By consciously diverting the stream/habit, you will find that the new route/change will start to dig a channel into your psyche and begin to take that new course on for itself.

On reflection, I have found this to be the case when removing tobacco, alcohol and Television from my life.

Just a wee thought.

[smartile]

Hi Stephen,

It's true! If you make physiological changes to your patterns throughout the day ('doing' changes), your neurons will create entirely new neural pathways in your brain. The new neural pathways make it easier to initiate that action the next time - it gets easier every time.

[dave marshall]

Hi stephen,

have you explored NLP, it has some great mind tools that may help,

check it out on google if you have time,

dave

[Stephen]

I havent actually.

Since reading my very first PD book back in late 1996.."Selling for Dummies" by Tom Hopkins, I must say I havent read anything on NLP at all.

Strange when I come to think about it.

On self analysis, I am most powerful when I can find a morally compelling reason to do something.

During my Philosophy degree I discovered arguments from Philosophers against the use of animals as human property. I was knocked sideways. I immediately became vegan and couldnt consider another lifestyle.

After I read Allen Carr's book on Alcohol, I immediately stopped drinking alcohol, again due to some compelling arguments.

There are other areas of my life I continually try to improve but cant find that same 'golden combination' like in the above to cases to move me in that direction.

Is NLP the tool that can perhaps help me here?

[maxdof]

Originally Posted by Stephen

I was thinking and reading about this recently and came across a simple analogy which suddenly clarified things for me on how to change a bad habit into a good one. (the good and bad being subjective of course)

Think of a habit as a steam which finds the shortest route possible always (gravity allowed for)
The habit is the stream. Over time doing anything consistently will cut a deep gorge into your psyche, just as a steam cuts into even the deepest rock over time to find its way.
This is how powerful habits become.
To change a deeply ingrained habit, you must take steps to divert the stream.
Just as you would on diverting a real stream, you must help to change the flow of water initially be adopting a new route. On a stream you might dam it. On a habit you would consciously form a new habit.

But here's the crux. By consciously diverting the stream/habit, you will find that the new route/change will start to dig a channel into your psyche and begin to take that new course on for itself.

On reflection, I have found this to be the case when removing tobacco, alcohol and Television from my life.

Just a wee thought.

What if an habit was the intersection of knowlede (what to, why to), skills (how to), and desire (want to) and you focuse on the 3 aspects to implement a new habit ? Of course the habit has to be motivated by an higher process.

[Kevin Givens]

Thanks Stephen, that's a great way to think about it. I have a couple of questions for you.

Originally Posted by Stephen

On a stream you might dam it. On a habit you would consciously form a new habit.

On reflection, I have found this to be the case when removing tobacco, alcohol and Television from my life.

If I understand correctly, the key to diverting the stream is to consciously replace a bad habit with a good one. I would like to know what habit you used to replace tobacco use (for example).

If I were a smoker (which I'm not) would I just substitute 10 pushups every time I got the urge to smoke (to develop the habit of regular exercise)?

Also, what arguments led you to give up alcohol?

[lespauldude]

i'm very interested in exploring this topic. hopefully others here are feeling a gap between importance of good habits and the average man's ability to form them.

i like the analogy of streams to habits. they take a while to form but have large ramifications on the way we live our lives. good habits vs. bad habits determine life standards in the long run.

in order to make better habits and replace bad ones, there are a number of things that need to take place. note these are not to be taken step by step, with previous steps forgotten. see these instead as a general progression.

1. understanding
2. willpower
3. more understanding
4. change in environment

1. we must consciously understand that replacing a bad habit with a new one will improve our lives. we must get fiery about it and want it badly. we must also understand what it will take. most often people overestimate their willpower. the reality is that the mind is a projection of neuronal activity within the brain. there physical aspect to thoughts, neuron pathways, that determine our thoughts. know that it may be impossible to rid of these pathways 100% but it is possible to form new pathways and overlap them.

2. after step 1, we get a burst of willpower in understanding at a very conscious level that a bad habit is no good to us. we avoid the bad habit or encourage a new one for a few days. nevertheless, the subconscious level has still not been impacted, and we will need more understanding of how to sustain the new habits.

3. at this stage, one has already made initial attempts to carry out life with the new habits in place. he or she knows how it feels and what changes in life style are called for. he or she cannot continually remind his/herself of this good habit. there needs to be environmental changes at this point. this is a difficult step for many.

4. the environmental changes need to be put into place. this is like a support system that will continually make this habit easy to perform or a bad habit, difficult to perform.

i'll continue with a few examples drawn from my life later today. let me know what you guys think!

[lespauldude]

waking up early
1. understanding
2. willpower
3. more understanding
4. change in environment

1. knowing exactly what you'll gain from waking up. not just hours, but the things you'll do in the morning
2. setting up the clocks
3. knowing that alarms simply don't cut it when you tap the snooze button
4. putting the alarm across the house so you'll have to walk the distance and be fully awake by then. get creative with this. put the alarm in a safe in your room. save the key down the street. you'll really be awake by the time you turn off the alarm. you might as well go jogging if you're out of the house.

[mindset]

Changing bad habits to good ones are never that easy. We need a great deal of will and the discipline to accept and maintain the change.