Terrified of my Purpose?

[Dave Kaminski]

I know I'm "Only 19," but I don't like to let my age be a barrier.

Ever.

I've had a really tough time, ever since I found Steve's site, in finding my purpose. I know I want to help people, always act with honesty and integrity, and make people smile, but these aren't more than values, are they? I feel like everyone should want to do these things.

I'm trying, again, to discover my purpose, but I constantly find myself with writers block, which is a horrible thing to have when figuring out one's purpose.

How can I break through this fluffy fear and get to the substantial core of the matter!?

Thanks for your help. Imagine how much I will benefit when I figure this out from this thread!!! Don't you want to help me!?

[Fortune]

Writers block is a good thing. It's the universe's way of letting you know you're going about this the wrong way. Take a step back and then go left instead of right.

[Erik Mazzone]

Totally agree with the prior post. I tend to sometimes try to muscle stuff into place, like figuring out purpose, etc. When I get stuck, sometimes the best remedy is to take a breather and come back at it later, refereshed and from a different perspective.

Good luck!

[Dave Kaminski]

Originally Posted by Erik Mazzone

Totally agree with the prior post. I tend to sometimes try to muscle stuff into place, like figuring out purpose, etc. When I get stuck, sometimes the best remedy is to take a breather and come back at it later, refereshed and from a different perspective.

Good luck!

Thanks guys! It's tough when you've stopped marketing for your business and are unemployed, single and dropping out of school. I know leaving school wasn't the WRONG choice, as I knew from the start I didn't belong there. I'm working on a perfect-fit kind of job.

Should I get a temp job or two in between, and keep working my ass off to try to get a job in sales with Apple? Not only would I not mind relocating, it would probably be an awesome thing for me. Should I get any job with Apple that allows me to support myself and relocate if I must?

What do you think would stimulate the most growth or realization?

Thanks

[The Probabilist]

Have you done the exercise of living congruently? A great way to get closer to your purpose is by identifying the needs of your body, mind, heart and spirit. By writing down the desires you have in each of these categories you might discover a specific thing for you to do in life that fills all of these four needs.

In my case, what I must, can, want, and should do is become financially independent. But it's a very general purpose. Therefore, I can break it down into more specific tasks I do to accomplish this general mission.

For instance, I can combine my ability of statistics, math and probability calculus (mind) with my purpose to help others (spirit) and reach the conclusion that I'll write a book about how to overcome a gambling habit by showing that it's a reasonable thing to do. Or I could combine my passion for games (heart) and combine it with physical needs (body) and patent a board game that helps people improve their health and finances.

The goal itself, reaching financial freedom, then opens up even more time and effort to be put into tasks like these. Just keep mixing different aspects of your life together and try finding a solution that takes into account all of your unique needs, skills, passion and purpose.

Living Congruently

[Alvin]

Originally Posted by Dave Kaminski

Thanks guys! It's tough when you've stopped marketing for your business and are unemployed, single and dropping out of school. I know leaving school wasn't the WRONG choice, as I knew from the start I didn't belong there. I'm working on a perfect-fit kind of job.

Should I get a temp job or two in between, and keep working my ass off to try to get a job in sales with Apple? Not only would I not mind relocating, it would probably be an awesome thing for me. Should I get any job with Apple that allows me to support myself and relocate if I must?

What do you think would stimulate the most growth or realization?

Thanks

Hi Dave,

To answer this question fairly, I think we'd need to know what are your goals in this area, for example, why do you want to work for Apple and what do you want to get out of it?

[Erik Mazzone]

you're busy making other plans. I'm a big believer in that little bit of John Lennon hippie philosophy -- mostly because it seems like a lesson I must learn over and over again.

My best piece of input is to not tie yourself in knots over making the perfect decision. Life doesn't stand still, so what makes the most sense today will probably change tomorrow. Make the best decision you can right now, and be open to changing course when you need to.

Good luck!

[Dave Kaminski]

Originally Posted by Erik Mazzone

you're busy making other plans. I'm a big believer in that little bit of John Lennon hippie philosophy -- mostly because it seems like a lesson I must learn over and over again.

My best piece of input is to not tie yourself in knots over making the perfect decision. Life doesn't stand still, so what makes the most sense today will probably change tomorrow. Make the best decision you can right now, and be open to changing course when you need to.

Good luck!

Thanks Erik that makes a lot of sense actually!

I want to work at Apple, but primarily in sales. I think Apple has an extremely effective product that is a solution for a lot of people, and I love to help people and make people happy. I think I'd be able to help a lot of people by being a solution maker.

Also, the living congruently article helped a WHOLE LOT. It makes me feel good about getting a job with Apple, even if it is entry-level, and working my business on the side until I can work my way into the consultant position because I'll be on the right path to helping people and being proactive about it

THANKS SO MUCH GUYS!

[ChampionsChoice]

Dave,

You are asking some great questions, and it seems like your on the right track. Alot of 19 year olds (or even people in their 50s) aren't anywhere near asking those questions so you have ahead start already.Glad you have made the choice to not let age be a barrier. It never should be.

I've asked myself the same question about purpsose myself. I've asked God. I've asked my wise counsel. The only answer I have found yet is that you are to make up your own purpose, then take ACTION on it. Your life purpose will generally ve something that flows naturally for you. If along the way, your emotions are not in well-being, you may choose to tweak your plan a mite.

So have encountered some resistance--I understand. You are clear about a few of your values, and you are clear that you want to HELP others. This is a great place to be. Consider making a life vision for where you'd like to see your life in 5 years. Spell it out in great detail, then take some action.

I know I was kind of rambling there. I hope you can pull out some nugget that will be helpful. Phone by be a better, and I'll be glad to set up a time to chat about it some more.

Feel free to ring me:

[Dave Kaminski]

Originally Posted by ChampionsChoice

So have encountered some resistance--I understand. You are clear about a few of your values, and you are clear that you want to HELP others. This is a great place to be. Consider making a life vision for where you'd like to see your life in 5 years. Spell it out in great detail, then take some action.

Want to help me sculpt it? I'm going to use a number of different methods cumulatively so not much gets left out.

Let's start with Steve's four questions for congruence:

Want: Work with computers and small & medium size business
Can: Communicate, network, sell, operate and fix computers well, learn extremely quickly
Should: Work for win-win solutions and have customer interest in mind
Must: make an above rate salary so I can invest and retire early

I really want to work for Apple as a salesman for small and medium sized businesses or school or government computer needs. I think Apple has a LOT of untapped potential and could essentially work wonders for small and medium sized businesses.

I want to have a net worth of 3 million or so by the end of five years from Jan 1 2007, although this isn't totally necessary if I have a passive income of $40,000 or so by then. I'd also like to weigh between 175-180 pounds and do yoga daily. I want to have a condo at the 903 in Providence and be in a long term relationship with a beautiful young woman. I'd like to spend at least 50 hours a year volunteering as well by then.

How do you suppose I should plot this out? I'm already working towards the Apple job, and plan on still doing my computer business on the side. I'm ordering a new yoga dvd and I have my dvd player all ready to get that going, and I'm dating too. I'd like to tie the volunteering in with Apple so as to create some more goodwill with the company name once I've started working there.

I need some structure now. Want to help?

[Cassie]

Hi Dave. I feel terror sometimes too. When i look back at when i was 19, i had a very loosely construed inkling of what my life purpose was. Almost like a whisper of an idea. As odd as it seems, the universe has helped finesse that idea over the natural course of time. i strongly believe there are no coincidences in life. The experiences I've undergone these past few years have served in bringing me into closer alignment with my ultimate purpose. but I've realized it's also a life-long journey of self discovery.

Don't fret too much. Proceed on your journey as you are, and it will continue to crystalize and manifest itself with greater clarity.

[Cassie]

By the way, there may be a reason you were meant to post this and receive that phone number from the gentleman above. Perhaps give him a call and see where it leads you.

I love your goals. Very clear and concise. You seem as if you know exactly what you're looking for, now you need to put things into motion.

[ChampionsChoice]

Originally Posted by Dave Kaminski

I need some structure now. Want to help?

Alot of those seem like personal life goals, which is also a necessary part of this process. I think it will help to get a little more clear on the core motivations.

I'll be glad to talk with you more one on one to help facilitate the clarity. Part of my life purpose is to help people get clear about their vision, and live life to the fullest!

[Fusebox]

Dave, be flexible. What I mean by this is if you come across a purpose you feel very much geared towards, great, but if time passes and you lose motivation to continue it or see some flaws etc, let it pass, keep thinking, keep journaling. Have good intentions and purposes and follow up with positive affirmations.

If you have not already, read Think and Grow Rich by Napolean Hill.
Fantastic book. You'll get some great ideas out of it. Although the book is somewhat money focussed, the content can be applied in anyway you choose.

[Jill]

I've had a really tough time, ever since I found Steve's site, in finding my purpose.

Personally, I think you need to let your purpose find you.

[Adam]

I have to agree with Jill on this. Seven years ago, when I was nineteen, I was only starting to experience the events that would later shape my life purpose... It wasn't until I was twenty-one that a pivotal event happened in regards to my purpose, and it took five years of healing before I realized just how deeply those events affected me, before I could form my purpose.

I'm not saying that it will take you seven more years to find yours... More than likely, you'll find one in a couple of months. I will say, however, that getting out and seeing the world, both the beautiful and the pitiful, will help you immensely in finding exactly what you can do to feel right with the world.

When I was nineteen, I stood in the middle of the DMZ, the two kilometer wide strip of terror that separates North and South Korea. I touched the table where the cease-fire was signed, and where every negotiation for peace has failed since then. I stepped over the red line painted on the floor in that one-room building and could feel the tension tangibly. That was the first time that I felt my purpose, but I didn't have the maturity to realize that I was going about it the wrong way.

Two years later, I saw the twin towers of the World Trade Center the day before they fell... I was still in the military, on vacation, and was traveling from my ex's house to my home in Arizona... It took me five years, to the month, for me to let go of the part of my ego that had been shattered that day and find my purpose. I desperately hope that your path to your purpose is not nearly as violent. I don't regret it, though, because the height of my purpose matches the depth of my pain, to bring peace to everybody.

[Alvin]

Originally Posted by Adam

When I was nineteen, I stood in the middle of the DMZ, the two kilometer wide strip of terror that separates North and South Korea. I touched the table where the cease-fire was signed, and where every negotiation for peace has failed since then. I stepped over the red line painted on the floor in that one-room building and could feel the tension tangibly. That was the first time that I felt my purpose, but I didn't have the maturity to realize that I was going about it the wrong way.

Two years later, I saw the twin towers of the World Trade Center the day before they fell... I was still in the military, on vacation, and was traveling from my ex's house to my home in Arizona... It took me five years, to the month, for me to let go of the part of my ego that had been shattered that day and find my purpose. I desperately hope that your path to your purpose is not nearly as violent. I don't regret it, though, because the height of my purpose matches the depth of my pain, to bring peace to everybody.

Wow Adam, you sound like you have a wealth of experiences under your belt. Would love to hear more about the lessons you've drawn from them (perhaps in another thread?).

[Jill]

I also think you will find that you won't have just one "purpose" in your life.

You'll have varying purposes during the different stages of your life. Do what feels right for you now, and don't be afraid to go with the flow later in your life if/when things change.

[missy]

Originally Posted by Alvin

Wow Adam, you sound like you have a wealth of experiences under your belt. Would love to hear more about the lessons you've drawn from them (perhaps in another thread?).

i agree - this sounds really interesting.

but on the original topic...it's good to hear that your goals are so clear to you but for some reason it feels they may also work to restrict your journey. it's possible that because you're so focused on those exact things you might miss important signs along the way.

[Valeria]

Dave,

Is there any way you could start generating income for Apple right now?

Do they offer any kind of affiliate income? If you distributed their catalogues or something, and drummed up sales for them...is that even a possibility with their business model?

I ask because after reading how passionate you are about them, I know i would buy one from you! I've been thinking of switching over to apple next year (just bought a laptop last month, so I'm set for the next 6-10 months).

So if I can feel your dedication in your posts, might others as well?

What about putting up an apple-oriented website? An apple blog? An apple blog might earn you adsense income as well.

I'm just brainstorming here, but I'm trying to think of ways you can start living your dream today, not tomorrow, and how you can develop some visibility with the company right now...then if you still decide you want to work for them, you'll have a track record and you'll be the obvious choice.

- v

[Dave Kaminski]

Originally Posted by Valeria

Dave,

Is there any way you could start generating income for Apple right now?

I ask because after reading how passionate you are about them, I know i would buy one from you!
- v

This thread inspired me to refocus my efforts on my current computer consulting business. I'm not so much passionate about Apple as I am about efficient and problem-free computing. I'm actually going to write a business plan this time around and focus my efforts on the upper-middle class home owner client so that I can meet my income goals while helping people use their computers and internet with ease and security.

I'll always be self employed/business owner at heart, so I may as well be one in form too.