What if you cant do anything ?

[Sushi]

What happens when you do some searching and find that you’re not good at anything? Where do you go from there? I have no talents or hobbies and the only way I can become good at something is through extensive learning and by the time I am good at it I’m not really sure if I want to do it anymore. Where do I go from here and is there anything one can do?

[Xin]

Have fun.

Really.

Try different stuff. Sports, music, languages. Don't care if you suck or not at it. Just see if you like it or not. If you like it, you can keep doing whatever it is. It may be what you are looking for.

Don't 'do' searching. Try stuff, have fun.

See if that works for you.

[RT Wolf]

Wow, you must be really good at not having anything to be good at.

Relax. I remember Tim Ferriss (author of 4-Hour Workweek) suggesting that after you've let your interests atrophy for a long time, it may take some time to discover them again. Suggestions:

1. think about what you enjoyed doing as a child.
2. Try out a whole bunch of stuff and see what sticks.
3. You might be suffering from familarity blindness, ie that you're too close and too used to whatever your talent might be to really recognize it as a talent. One day it'll just hit. In general, you're wayyyyy too close to who you are.
4. Ask around to other people around you what they think your special talent is. This will obviously be biased (because other people will generally say your talents are those they themselves don't have, usually).
5. I've been where you are. Like I said, you're too close to who you are. For example, my special "talent" is The Knack, and I'm also supposed to be above average in intelligence, but I don't notie those things cause they're just normal to me. When I find someone who doesn't have the Knack, I just wonder how they oculdn't see something so obvious to me. And that just might happen to you.

[Jennihul]

Originally Posted by Sushi

What happens when you do some searching and find that you’re not good at anything?

You mean like Steven Hawking, the world-class theoretical physicist paralyzed in that wheelchair? Or that guy I know who programs computers with his eye movement because it's all he can do?

Hmmm...

Sounds like someone needs some perspective...


Jennifer

[Power]

I've seen in most people that sometimes you dont have to be good at something, as long as you become passionate in what you do, then you grow and develop your skills along the way.

A simple example was a friend of mine. He didn't have a clue of how to play table tennis. When I saw him play he was really bad, but he wanted to play because it was fun. 3 years later he was playing 1 level below state league table tennis Sometime you just gotta love what you do, it doesn't matter if you are skillful at it. As long as you enjoy it, you will develop the skills along the way and become good at it.

So go out there and do something that you enjoy.

We are not born talented, we are born helpless. Talent is developed and it is nurtured as we live our lives.

[evelynlim]

Hello Sushi,

I can understand the feeling about not having something that you are good at doing. For the longest time, I felt the same way too. I felt as if I had no skills and strengths and that I had no superior abilities as compared to anyone.

My suggestion is that you start with how you feel when you do a certain activity. To ensure that it is not just a whim, when you think about this activity, ask yourself if you have felt this way for a long time. So if you feel good about doing art, start with that. Then, delve into what area you can see yourself doing more of. It may be graphic design, website designer, animation artist, etc.

No one is born having the skills to do what it takes for a passion to take off. Just look at Tiger Woods. He may be passionate about golf. But in order to be really good, he has to work hard.

If you start off with a passion, you can acquire the skills and knowledge to make it work for you.

Take care,
Evelyn

[Sushi]

Thank you this is great advice!

[Adrian]

I agree with the other posters - just try out as many activities as you can with an open mind and see which ones strongly register with you! If you go into trying something new - such as learning the violin - with an "I'm never going to like this!" mindset, you just created a self-fulfilling prophecy for yourself. Just be open, and see what activities out there click for you!

[tsdary]

Hey Sushi --

I know exactly how you feel.. Most of my life I always seemed to be 'searching' for that thing that just pops right out and makes me say, THIS is what I should do!

But let's face it, this is how society works: We go to school to 'get good at something' and then work really really hard for other ppl to hire us and prove all over again that we can do that thing really really good for a really really long time......just so we can retire and then REALLY do what we all wanna do - just live, relax, and travel!! Am I right?

Don't be down. There are many ppl out there who aren't great at one particular thing, you just have to go do whatever you wanna do, have FUN w/ it.. the things you like to do the most (even if you suck at it!) you do more often, and evetually will become better.. Now, don't sit there and compare yourself to the pros..

No matter what you do, there will always be someone better at one thing than you are... that's w/ EVERYONE.

Sit down and ask yourself what your goals are. To have a lot of money? To have Fun? To travel the world? What can you do that you can say, "I'm proud of myself because I...." OR Imagine yourself 25 years later. What would be the biggest regret? "I really wish I just would've...(blank) when I was younger!" DO IT NOW!!

If you are serious in making a change in your life for the better, hear me out.. I will show you what I do. I wasn't good at anything. My goal was wealth, and I'm fortunate to say I now live an incredibly abundant life, more than I could ever ask for. And what I got good at was helping others achieve this goal. This requires no background. Only that you have a strong desire to succeed. If I can do it.. YOU can do it too! So whatever it may be, the one thing you don't want to end up saying is, "I should have!"
Good luck friend!! Take care
http://www.*********************.com/71923

[Freelancer]

What if you can do anything you want but you can't choose?

[Adrian]

What if you can do anything you want but you can't choose?

I'd pick a random hobby, then dive into it as deep as I could go for an extended period of time. If I didn't like it after a while (say, 1 to 3 months), I'd quit and try something else.

[Freelancer]

Originally Posted by Adrian

I'd pick a random hobby, then dive into it as deep as I could go for an extended period of time. If I didn't like it after a while (say, 1 to 3 months), I'd quit and try something else.

Excellent answer.

Now I'm curious what the OP will answer.

[Chill of Eons]

Sushi,

I would think it impossible for anyone to have no hobbies unless all they do is work, sleep and eat. Do you read? Play videogames? Listen to any music whatsoever? I'd consider all of those hobbies, even though they aren't particularly "active" ones. But through creativity you can make them more active. For example, instead of just reading, I sometimes record myself reading stuff that is of interest or "useful if I actually apply it" (Steve's articles for one), and doing so makes me feel more active. Sometimes it's even challenging. It's satisfying and exciting too when I read it in a way that strikes me as funny. That makes me more eager to show it to others.

On another, but still related matter, maybe you are just afraid to try new things (as I am), for a number of reasons/excuses, like fear of not being able to handle the frustration if you keep messing up, or thinking that you'll have to put an excruciating amount of time and energy into something before you're able to find any enjoyment in it, or fear that it may take over your life. You could produce a virtually unlimited variety of fears and what ifs that will only cause infinite lethargy. That's where I'm at, by my own choice of course (I consider myself conscious at least to some degree of the majority of my own negative manifestations), and it's not a very empowering place to be.

What are you doing with your life right now? Have you gone to college yet? Formal studies (as far as I know) usually gives people enough exposure to different learning experiences to at least get a better idea of what they might be passionate about. But that's not really me speaking, since it's not my experience given that I've had very little college so far, it's just what I hear all the time.

Oh, and I just remembered, personal development could be considered a "hobby" also, though probably more typically classified as a "direction."