I am "stuck"

[jawillie]

I don't know if this is the right board to post my frustrations, but by looking at the description, I would say it fits pretty close. Though, I do tend to get sprititual, as well, so I hope I don't offend anyone.

I just feel STUCK.

I know how I want to live and feel, yet there seems to be this WALL that I am refusing to knock down. And this wall is keeping me from a better life. I mean, it is almost a literal wall, that is how "real" it feels. Yet, I don't know how to knock it down.

I am sure this doesn't even make sense to anyone but me, so I won't be offended if I just get a "huh?"

My career: I am not happy in my career. There are aspects of it that I love, but then there are aspects of it that are draining the life out of me. I have bills to pay, my dh needs me to contibute to our life, financially, so I can't just "quit."

I have been trying to figure out what to do to make it more positive, but again... I just feel STUCK.

I thought I had a list of other areas in my life that needed work, but I just found out everything else is fine, it's just my career.

I lost all drive to give it my all. I lost all motivation to nuture it and be the best at what I do. Just thinking about all the things I have to do makes me let out a heavy sigh of exhaustion.

I once loved my job.

So, is it just ME or what? I don't want to quit this job to do ANOTHER "job".. what good is that? To be miserable someplace else doesn't make much sense.

I have tried to think differently, and that will work for a day or two, but then I just feel burdened again.

I am just frustrated. I feel SO STUCK!!!

How does one get "unstuck?"

ETA: I realize this post makes me sound liek Eeyore from Winnie the Pooh. That's how I FEEL when it comes to my career. I am just so down in the dumps!!

[Tobias Zimpel]

I believe that it is your attitude towards your job that changed the way you experience your work.

I once read a great book that changed my attitude towards my work - perhaps it helps you, too. It's called "Fish!"

It's a parable that touched my heart and changed my attitude at a very deep level. I won't tell you too much about it, because I don't want to spoil your reading experience.

Here's a link to the book at amazon.com: Fish! A Remarkable Way to Boost Morale and Improve Results: Books: Stephen C. Lundin,Harry Paul,John Christensen

However, this book will probably be available in most public libraries.

[jawillie]

Originally Posted by Tobias Zimpel

I believe that it is your attitude towards your job that changed the way you experience your work.

I once read a great book that changed my attitude towards my work - perhaps it helps you, too. It's called "Fish!"

It's a parable that touched my heart and changed my attitude at a very deep level. I won't tell you too much about it, because I don't want to spoil your reading experience.

Here's a link to the book at amazon.com: Fish! A Remarkable Way to Boost Morale and Improve Results: Books: Stephen C. Lundin,Harry Paul,John Christensen

However, this book will probably be available in most public libraries.

Thank you for the link! I will check out my library this weekend.

I actually did some soul-searching this afternoon and decided that much of the reason I "hate" my job is due to lack of confidence and a lowered self-esteem when it comes to my work. The only way I can fix that is by doing certain things.

I vow that in the next 30 days I will complete a list I made that will raise my work performance and, I believe, will also raise my "love" for my job again.

We will see how it goes!!

I do know, ultimately, it's all my attitude. It's just you hope and wish for that easy answer, you know? There isn't one... it's all in our own minds. And change is hard.... that takes WORK!!!

[Alison Jenkins]

Have you tried saying some positive affirmations about your job? - for example "I am good at my job"

Also write down all the thoughts that go through your mind when you do not feel positive about your job. Perhaps this will reveal what is really going on

Alison

[Keith]

Originally Posted by jawillie

I know how I want to live and feel, yet there seems to be this WALL that I am refusing to knock down. And this wall is keeping me from a better life. I mean, it is almost a literal wall, that is how "real" it feels. Yet, I don't know how to knock it down.

[...]

My career: I am not happy in my career. There are aspects of it that I love, but then there are aspects of it that are draining the life out of me. I have bills to pay, my dh needs me to contibute to our life, financially, so I can't just "quit."

Are you perhaps looking at things in a binary way? eg. "Stay" vs "quit"?

IIRC, Steve's advice in this sort of situation was to set up parallel tracks and do both. Even if you have no intention of quitting your job at the moment, start making small steps towards your career of choice. Volunteer in your spare time. Join groups relevant to where you want to be. etc.

If you're not able to jump without a parachute (and most of us aren't), start making yourself a parachute. (No relation to "What colour is your parachute?", BTW).

[GoalSettingCollege]

Keith, a lot of frustrations in our life stems from the deviation of our perception versus the expectations of our reality. In your case, it's your career.

You mentioned that you used to love your job. Now, what do you think have changed to make you to hate it now? List out these factors and brainstorm solutions for each and every one of them. Trust me, you'll be surprised at how much you knew the answers to your own problems.

Set these as goals and when you've something to look forward to and change, the momentum will keep you moving, getting you unstuck before you know it.

Having been there, done that. I truly attest to this.

Cheers,
Ellesse

[Keith]

Just to clarify, the OP who was having concerns about his job was Jawillie, not me.

[Maguru]

In spiritual terms, 'feeling stuck' is being stuck in your thinking. Your frustration comes from this old way of thinking that is not working for you any longer.
When you are loving your work, is it when you are achieving? When you don't love your work, is it mundane and not challenging, or do you not feel good enough?
Looking a little deeper, I feel you judge yourself. The swing in your attitude could well be from judging yourself as good and bad.
You know yourself as a good person and you know you are human. Why torture yourself? You don't have to love your job. Most don't. You love your motive for working and you can't get better than that. It's wonderful and I'm sure you are appreciated.

Originally Posted by jawillie

I don't know if this is the right board to post my frustrations, but by looking at the description, I would say it fits pretty close. Though, I do tend to get sprititual, as well, so I hope I don't offend anyone.

I just feel STUCK.

I know how I want to live and feel, yet there seems to be this WALL that I am refusing to knock down. And this wall is keeping me from a better life. I mean, it is almost a literal wall, that is how "real" it feels. Yet, I don't know how to knock it down.

I am sure this doesn't even make sense to anyone but me, so I won't be offended if I just get a "huh?"

My career: I am not happy in my career. There are aspects of it that I love, but then there are aspects of it that are draining the life out of me. I have bills to pay, my dh needs me to contibute to our life, financially, so I can't just "quit."

I have been trying to figure out what to do to make it more positive, but again... I just feel STUCK.

I thought I had a list of other areas in my life that needed work, but I just found out everything else is fine, it's just my career.

I lost all drive to give it my all. I lost all motivation to nuture it and be the best at what I do. Just thinking about all the things I have to do makes me let out a heavy sigh of exhaustion.

I once loved my job.

So, is it just ME or what? I don't want to quit this job to do ANOTHER "job".. what good is that? To be miserable someplace else doesn't make much sense.

I have tried to think differently, and that will work for a day or two, but then I just feel burdened again.

I am just frustrated. I feel SO STUCK!!!

How does one get "unstuck?"

ETA: I realize this post makes me sound liek Eeyore from Winnie the Pooh. That's how I FEEL when it comes to my career. I am just so down in the dumps!!

[Adrian]

I know how I want to live and feel, yet there seems to be this WALL that I am refusing to knock down.

... so you know how you want to live and feel, but you can't seem to find a way to live like that because there's something keeping you from... expressing yourself? ... finding a new job more suitable for you?

Or perhaps you don't even know yourself how to get there, and so "the wall" is just your perception of the roadblocks you're currently facing (such as buckling down and really thinking about your future?)

Just throwing it out there.