Highschool year in foreign country?!

[Murre]

Hello! I'm new on these forums, though I have read Steve's blog for some time now. I'm a 16 year old boy from Norway and I am really interested in personal growth.

Two months ago I decided to apply for highschool year in Germany. The thought of spending a year in a forreign country sounded so great and exciting.
Two weeks ago I got mail saying that I was accepted for the program in Germany. However some days ago I got this sort of awakening. I got all kinds of fears like: What I am doing?! Am i mature enough to handle this? I cant be away from home that long!

The weird thing is that I keep changing my mind all the time. On friday morning I was really into going. Later that day I thought the complete opposite. Yesterday I felt I had decided to go. And today I am really doubtful. I'm basically very unsure. But I have to make a decision.

I'm kind of thinking that courage is the way to go and really go for it. On the other hand, maybe the fears do have a point to make.

I am not asking you to make a decision for me. But are there any decision-making tips? A way to really feel what is the right decision?

I appreciate your help

[Michelle]

I went to Germany through the Rotary Club for a year after high school in the US (age 17). It was probably one of the most difficult years of my life, but it literally opened my eyes to the world. My life changed completely as a result of my decision to go - it didn't become easier, but much richer. As a Norwegian I imagine you would have an easier time making the transition simply because you grow up with more awareness of other countries and the outside world. Most of you speak at least three languages as well. That said, the quality of life and general cultural values could come as a shock to you as I believe they are quite different.

Going away from home to a strange place can be scary, but exciting at the same time. Remember Norway is not that far from Germany and if you are truly unhappy, you can always go home and learn from your failed experience. I think it is better to try and fail than not to try at all.

I'm now 29 and if there was any advice I would give to my 17 year old self it would be:

- choose the country based on passion, true interest and fascination rather than what you think will be practical. I found the German way of life very much in opposition to the kind of life I wanted to live. If I had known to follow my passion and intuition, I would have chosen France, Russia, Israel, or Italy. On the other hand, I got a chance to visit Switzerland which is where I live now and which wouldn't have been on my original list. I love it here and have never been happier!

[Tristan]

Hello,

Something inside of you compelled you to go initiate the program to begin with, so the interest is there....it's just that the realities of all the practicalities are starting to take hold of you now.

It doesn't matter if your 16, 21, 40 or 70.....everyone has their fears. If you let your fears dictate your life, then that is not personal growth....that's personal decline.

Remember that a hero is never one who is fearless. A hero feels the fear and has the courage to move forward regardless. Be a hero in your own life and see this as a wonderful opportunity for personal growth!

[Amatrine]

I did a year in England, but I guess since we speak the same language it isnt the same,lol Go for it! You will remember it for the rest of your life.

Ama

[SuperManny]

Life is an adventure, I'd have jumped at such a chance if I had one. I don't know if you know the language, but you wouldn't have to. Probably be easier tho.

My wife's cousin had a chance to go to Germany on a scholarship, and she liked it so much she's still there.

[Murre]

Thanks for the replies
I've learnt german at school for 3 years so I have a familiarity with the language. I also feel a fascination for the country.
Yesterday I made the desicion to go for it and I felt really good about it. But at school today I couldn't concentrate at all. I was just filled up with fear and anxiety. It's really weird how the mind works, I have had such an peace of mind about the thing for two months now.

I'll try a inner guide meditation and see what answers I get. Clearly my mind cannot make a desicion.

I have another posibility of going to Wales too, my county has a cooperation with six schools in Wales.

I'll talk to the school councellor about it tomorrow.

Thanks for the support and understanding

[Angela]

Boy, this is as suspenseful as a Hitchcock movie!

I sure hope you choose to go. I think you will be so very glad you did.

It will probably be challenging, and you'll almost certainly encounter pain of some sort.

And it is likely that you will be whole new person when (if!) you return -- with strength, resources, friends, ideas, and abilities you never even dreamed of, ones that are not available to people who stay put. I'm so excited for you!

[LesGawn]

Commitment to an idea, any idea, is such a hard thing, especially at your age.

I am now in my fifties and most of the best things I have done have been taking advantage of an opportunity that I have not been totally sure about.

It can make life a bit scary, but it has great compensations.

I think you will benefit from spending time away. I was very lucky to have family spread all over Europe and I used visits to them from the age of sixteen to broaden my horizons in a way that would have been impossible if I had not left England.

I visited Norway once and have family still in Southern Germany. Yes - very different.

Go for it. Commit yourself to the opportunity you have sought out for yourself.

Ask for help when you need it, too.

I have only just discovered this site myself - and cannot imagine how much wider my contacts would have been if its like had been around when I was really discovering things new!

Best of luck - and enjoy!

[Murre]

Hi again!
I made the desicion to go two days ago, and I have a great feeling about it. Once again
I think my perspective about the hole exchange thing now is much better and clearer than before I had all these doubts. I also had nice chat with one of the AFS (my organization) volunteers yesterday where we arranged a home visit next week.

I really feel my desicion to do this is going to boost my motivation for further personal development over the next 6 months before I leave. And I certainly don't think the personal development is going to end there.

Thanks for the helpful posts

[Alison Jenkins]

I've made several major decisions in my life where fear has suddenly overwhelmed me - usually about 24hrs before I am due to go! My experience is the hardest decisions have been the best.

A few years ago I went to live in the USA for 2 yrs. I had never seen where we were going to live until we agreed to go, but I literally told myself if I hated it I could come back home in 2 years. Guess what we loved it and stayed there 6 years. I had 2 children at the time and had another 2 while we were there!

Travelling abroad is so much easier when you have no family dependents, as you only have yourself to consider. Once you have kids you have other people to consider. I would say travel while you are young because most people only have a few years when they can do this easily.

Alison

[Scipio]

I'm in college and going on a one year exchange to Korea. My advice to you would be to consider the rational reasons that would benefit you for going. These relate directly to your passions and happiness.

I'm going to Korea because:

I can train judo at a university level.
I may consider teaching ESL there after college.
I need to get out of my Mom's house because there is often conflict.
I am already interested in the language.

If you are just going somewhere on a whim, then you may find the experience doesn't benefit you as much as just staying put. However, if you have goals and passions that are better pursued in Germany, then go for it.

Focus on your goals.