Considering dropping out of school

[rbhambha]

Hi all,

This has been on my mind for a long while now, and I think I've finally reached a new level of consciousness in my life which has helped me make this decision.

I'm currently a junior at The University of Texas at Austin, and in the Business Honors Program and the Finance program. It's a great program, one of the top in the nation, but ever since I got in, I've been feeling like school is incongruent with who I am.

Let me give you some background info before diving into my situation. My father is a graduate of IIT (India's top school) and MIT (another great school) here in the states. He strongly believes in formal education, and he's doing very well for himself in a business sense. He's told me a number of times that he can rest in peace when I've gotten my college degree. He says this is how he will feel he has done his job as a parent. A while back, I discussed dropping out of school with him. He was upset, and didn't think I had considered all angles of the situation. He thought I was acting on impulse, and that it was the wrong decision. This was about a year ago.

When I look back on that time today, I realize I felt like dropping out of school due to my pride. I believed I didn't need school to succeed in life (which I still believe), but I didn't really have the courage to drop out of school at that time. Talking about it just made me feel proud and gave me an ego boost.

Recently, I have felt like my desire to drop out of school is coming from a completely different source. I'm the kind of guy who dives head first into new things. I completely immerse myself in a way of life to make sure I capture the whole experience. I've worked as an employee for 2 summers, I've started and ran my own businesses, and I felt that both of those were suboptimal lifestyles.

When working as an employee, I felt as though I had no freedom (my heart was incongruent with what I was doing). While running my own business, I felt I had freedom. However, I felt like I was meant to be doing something more (my spirit wasn't congruent with what I was doing). I've recently started a blog, and I write on personal development. I feel like my skills are put to much better use through this medium and lifestyle. Mind, body, spirit, and heart all feel congruent.

While I don't think I'll be writing a blog for the rest of my life, I feel like serving the highest good is in line with my strengths (relator, harmony, input, intellect), and gives me a greater sense of fulfillment. This makes me feel school's role in my life is obsolete.

The things I'm learning have no purpose in my life. I don't see why I will need them in the future, and they definitely won't help me serve the highest good (my purpose). I feel no sense of motivation to do the work, or listen in class. This lack of motivation is a recent development (the last year). Prior to this, I've been an A student (3.9 GPA), so I know my subconscious mind is trying to tell me something.

I know I can thoroughly depend on myself. I have the courage to make it on my own. I no longer feel the fear I once did a year ago. I have the ability to educate myself, and make it on my own without a formal education. If my father decides to stop supporting me, I'll figure out a way to make it all work. I feel like I can't waste time with school anymore. I want to do what I love to do, and actually make a large impact on this world. I don't want to help people raise their finances, I want to help people raise their consciousness and reach their true potential.

Now that I've told you all my story, what's your perspective on it? I figured I would consult conscious people, rather than people at school or my family, because you guys can see where I'm coming from. Please share any insight you feel will be helpful in making my decision.

Thank you,

Rahul

[Halcyon]

Well Rahul,

You are right to be congruent with your purpose. If you aren't living to your full potential then your robbing yourself and the world of the gift you are to provide. (whatever that may be)

I suggest if you are able financially, is to take some time off from school and figure out what your purpose is. Once you've figured that out you can go back to school if you need it. Otherwise your wasting time, money and yourself.

-Halcyon

[Dan.Linehan]

I'd get your degree anyway.

It doesn't hurt, and some of the more purpose driven things that you'll want to do later may require one.

[Zukin]

Hi Rahul,

I was a college dropout for two weeks until I re-enrolled. I didn't like college which is why I dropped out, but I liked college after I re-enrolled. It was all in my mind. I started reading personal development books and figured out how to reframe the situation by asking myself "How can I make this experience serve me?" By asking that, I got a lot out of the college experience and I made sure I had more fun.

Some famous person said:
"The mind can make a hell out of heaven or a heaven out of hell"
In other words, a lot of your experience is made up by your perception of what you are experiencing.

Here's an interesting idea too:
Why don't you talk to your father and ask him how he would get the most out of a college experience. Since he likes formal education so much, he may have some good tips about making the most of your time at college.

I would also recommend these books:
Amazon.com: Campus CEO: The Student Entrepreneur's Guide to Launching a Multi-Million-Dollar Business: Books: Randal Pinkett

Amazon.com: The Student Success Manifesto: Books: Michael Simmons

Amazon.com: Zero to One Million: How to Build a Company to $1 Million in Sales: Books: Ryan P. M. Allis

These books are written by (respectively): A guy with a Ph.D in business who ran a business in college, a college dropout who started his own business, and a college dropout who started two businesses and is planning on re-enrolling in school.

[Brutha]

What is your purpose?

[rbhambha]

To develop conscious mastery over my mind, and to help others do the same along the way. To serve the highest good to the fullest of my capabilities. To always choose to play the game of life, and never sit on the sidelines while opportunity passes me by.

[ticktockclok]

I can see where you're coming from; My uncle went to IIT-Mumbai, my mom went to college in Pune, and my dad went to a state engineering college. Over there, the only way seems to be to cram your head off, do good in board exams, go to college, get a good job. Though the system is essentially the same over here, you have more options. I know my aunt, when going to college in the US, became very confused when the college gave her a sheet with the electives she could take. She called back home, talking for hours, because she had never heard of electives; previously, everything was assigned to her. In this way, your dad probably feels that you shouldn't take any other options, and just stay to the strict path.

My parents were the same when I suggested that I drop out of high school and be an autodidact, or maybe just get a high school degree from an online charter school. They didn't agree, for the same reasons as your dad. My solution was to mentally drop out of school, stop giving a damn about grades as long as it kept my parents off my back, and have some fun pissing off all the teachers I didn't like.

You're over eighteen. Obviously, you have a lot more freedom than I do to do what you want. So if you're living with your parents, plan to move out, because I doubt an Indian dad will be someone you want to be around after not allowing him to "rest in peace". Don't jump off the ship immediately, because if you decide to quit college and be an entrepreneur and make millions blogging, where are you going to stay while you build up? Its pretty hard to live out your life's purpose when you're hitting soup kitchens every night and living off a welfare check.

What is your purpose anyway?

[rbhambha]

Originally Posted by ticktockclok

I can see where you're coming from; My uncle went to IIT-Mumbai, my mom went to college in Pune, and my dad went to a state engineering college. Over there, the only way seems to be to cram your head off, do good in board exams, go to college, get a good job. Though the system is essentially the same over here, you have more options. I know my aunt, when going to college in the US, became very confused when the college gave her a sheet with the electives she could take. She called back home, talking for hours, because she had never heard of electives; previously, everything was assigned to her. In this way, your dad probably feels that you shouldn't take any other options, and just stay to the strict path.

My parents were the same when I suggested that I drop out of high school and be an autodidact, or maybe just get a high school degree from an online charter school. They didn't agree, for the same reasons as your dad. My solution was to mentally drop out of school, stop giving a damn about grades as long as it kept my parents off my back, and have some fun pissing off all the teachers I didn't like.

You're over eighteen. Obviously, you have a lot more freedom than I do to do what you want. So if you're living with your parents, plan to move out, because I doubt an Indian dad will be someone you want to be around after not allowing him to "rest in peace". Don't jump off the ship immediately, because if you decide to quit college and be an entrepreneur and make millions blogging, where are you going to stay while you build up? Its pretty hard to live out your life's purpose when you're hitting soup kitchens every night and living off a welfare check.

What is your purpose anyway?

ticktockclock, thank you for the insight; and everyone else, thank you very much for yours. it has all been very useful! ticktock, my purpose is right above your post. i talked with my dad about it, and he said as a father, his duty is to provide me with shelter and food, so he will definitely do that. i can stay at home, but the responsibility will be all mine. i'll have to pay for all of my things and I will have to not be a burden on anyone. this is more than I was expecting, so that's a good thing.

after doing some reflection on what Zukin said, I see that I can reframe the role of school in my life. perhaps I can see it as something which I can use to build self discipline. however, I do believe that i have a tremendous amount of self-discipline already, and it may just be forcing myself to do what I don't like to do, and I don't think that's what life is about. I believe self discipline is a method to keep yourself on the path you've set for yourself. so if school isn't on my path, then I don't see the point in using self discipline to do well (if that makes ANY sense at all, I'll be amazed!) anyways, i understand your concern, and thank you for that perspective.

Perhaps I can use school for different reasons, but that won't change the fact that I have to deal with worthless classes that don't serve my interest or purpose. I don't know how to get around that one. I can still continue to blog, even if I am in school. I guess this is all a question of freedom. Do I want to restrict myself to the confines of class and useless drivel (at least to my life) for 2 more years? Or will I tolerate it? It's a tough decision, and it does take a lot of courage (i'm realizing).

Please provide any more insight if you have any. This is a very hard decision, and I appreciate your perspectives.

Rahul

[RT Wolf]

A few things:

1. If you feel school is thrust upon you, you'll dislike it. Even if you consciously choose to take courses you know you'll dislike because...for whatever reason, you'll still like them better than if you felt they were thrust on you.
2. Your dad may have a heart attack at first, but he'll eventually learn to deal with your decision. People are a lot more resliant then you might give them credit for, especially parents.
3. You might decide to either take a year off yourself, or tell your dad that you are taking a year off work. Make it clear to him that you are not deciding to drop out just yet, but just takig some time off. Start running your own business or whatever you're working on. Try to keep him updated so he understands you're not just slacking off. If you can prove to him that it doesn't really matter whether you get a degree or not and that you'll be successful anyway because you are in your year off, he might re-evaluate why he wants you to go to school in the first place. This is point is mostly about relationship management.
4. If you do take a year off, depending on how many courses yo've taken, you could get a degree online, or take online courses that you might be able to transfer to your current degree.
5. Alterantively, try study or work abroad programs. Sometimes a new place and a new perspective is just what you need. You can also claim that you are continuing your educaiton, ut just in a different country.

I took a year off nad it was the best thing I did. I eventually decided (like you) that I'll be successful whether I have a degree or not. So I simply decided to take courses I'm interested in. I also sit in on an extra class or two for interest. How many students love learning so much as to spend an extra two-three hours a week of their own time in MORE classes?

I really like the year or two off option, myself, because it seems to offer hte best of both worlds.

[create purpose]

i'll be short..
you are so close to finishing. just stick with it and collect as many contacts as you can while you are there. that is where the true gold is.

[ken nubo]

Do whatever feels the best for you.

I'm a high school drop out, and I did it because it was best for me.

Yay.

[Jason S]

I fully second Dr. Lisa: finish and while you're there, meet as many people as you can.

You are surrounded by some of the best and brightest in the country... if you think your passion is to achieve mastery en route to promoting the greatest good, realize that you have more ability to start doing good RIGHT NOW than you will again in a long, long time... because right now, you are surrounded by the greatest gift you ever could have hoped would be dropped in your lap: talented, hard working, energetic people!

Afraid opportunity might pass you by? I'd be more concerned that it's knocking and you're yelling at it to go away! UT b-school is one of the greatest opportunities you could have ever dreamed to ask for... it can literally unlock the paths to the most powerful movers and shakers in the country... I have a good friend who went through UT; he's doing quite well for himself in a career that he made by his own design. I graduated from Wharton as an undergraduate, and I experience the value of college every day when I make a phone call and listen to people react to my academic pedigree, or when I discover that someone I need to talk to is a UPenn alumn.

College per se is not your issue. Courage is not your issue. Finding yourself and finding your purpose are not your issues. Your only issue at the moment seems to be that your perspective is not yet broad enough to let you recognize how much you have at your feet already... so I'd say, get back in the game, turn your brain down, focus on your work, and have fun. Go to the coffee shops, to ACL, football games, SXSW, and everything else Austin's got going on. Do your work and make friends with your class mates. Introduce yourself to everybody. You don't need clarity on how to "use" school. You just need to stop thinking about things and go DO them!

[rbhambha]

Jason, I see what you mean when you say school is an "opportunity knocking on my door." Everything you mentioned is true, and there are so many opportunities to meet so many interesting people. However, my concern is still how I am going to force myself to learn the subject material if I don't believe it's necessary. Is it a question of self-discipline, or is it something else? I'm not so sure.

Everyone's advice has been eye opening, thank you all.

Rahul

[Jason S]

I have a business degree. Two of them, in fact, including an MBA. I don't think you realize how useful that eduction can be... if you invest yourself. Of course, I could say the same thing about other programs, so if the material isn't for you, maybe you could consider switching into liberal arts, or psychology... or even think about transferring. (Maybe a smaller campus would suit you better?)

Whatever you do, finish.

Your decision is bigger than you realize. It's more than self-discipline in the "I'm going to set my alarm and wake up at 7am" sense of the phrase. It's self-discipline in the "I know what it takes to finish something big" sense. It's understanding your place in a chain that's far bigger than you and your dad. (This chain goes back generations, and goes forward generations; the consequences of this decision will reverberate not across years, but across generations. It will be felt by your dad, you, and if you have kids, by them and your grandchildren... if you ever have to say, "I'm sorry, sweetie, I can't do that," you'll wonder if college would have made the difference.) It's perseverence, it's overcoming adversity, it's the ability to juggle multiple issues at once, it's the willingness to invest in yourself... and most of all, it's sound judgment.

Don't quit. If you have multiple options and discover you can't do them all, fine--give one up in order to focus elsewhere. Just don't quit.

Mark Twain said of classic books, "A classic is a book everyone wants to have read, but no one wants to read." Maybe that's college for you... just keep turning the pages until you get to the end!

[Brutha]

A university is a place full of beautiful ideas, full of energy, if you accept it.

Originally Posted by Jason S

Jason, I see what you mean when you say school is an "opportunity knocking on my door." Everything you mentioned is true, and there are so many opportunities to meet so many interesting people. However, my concern is still how I am going to force myself to learn the subject material if I don't believe it's necessary. Is it a question of self-discipline, or is it something else? I'm not so sure.

You could also say it is a question of mastery over your own mind, that coincidentally is your life purpose, so you should work on it.

If you have nothing better to do than studying like founding a company in right moment, when you see a marketed need, do it.
When you can find another powerful idea to persue, you might follow it.
At the moment their isn't really a conflict between your purpose of searching mastery of your mind and being at university.

When you have to learn some economic model, transfer it in your mind to the level of the individual.
How would someone behave in a personal development sense when he would try to benefit from that model?

[rbhambha]

Great advice guys. I've taken it to heart and changed my decision. I'll stay in school, and tough it out for 2 more years. I'll start to focus on the value I can obtain from it.

Rahul

[RT Wolf]

You always have options even in your decision to stick to school. Take either a higher than average workload,or a lower than full courseload, leaving you time to work on your own stuff. Continue to work on your own stuff.

Good to hear you made a decision. Have fun!