Detached and "wowed"?

[AUserName]

Hi, I'm new here and I hope you can understand my English...

You guys talk a lot about detaching from the outcome and I know that you're right, but that also takes away a lot of the pleasure from getting what you want(at least in my "ignorant knowledge"). Right now, I'm living in a really cool flat that I love and am grateful to live in, but it isn't exciting as it would've been a while ago. I'm "peacefully grateful" about it, which I find comforting, but kind of boring. I feel that I have money coming my way and I'm somewhat bored with the idea too. So, what's the point? I obviously prefer to be bored in a mansion than in a slum, but I'd still be bored.

I wonder if we are trapped in lives of either lack, boredom, or "peaceful gratitude". I don't want, for example, to just be rich and grateful for it, I want to be rich, grateful and "wowed" about it. Do you know a way to be detached and still enjoy the outcome the same way you would've if you were attached?

Thank you. xoxox

[Zenn]

My understanding is that lacks create desires which then manifest new realities and expand the Universe. Being datached means not being needy or desperate for what you desire.

Contrary to many people's desires, as demonstrated in this forum, your aspiration may not be more money or other common wishes. If you are bored with what you have, you may be temporarily happy with manifesting more, but likely what you need is to find your life's purpose and your real lack so you may discover what makes you happy and fulfiled. Maybe you want to manifest a new way of life instead of more of the same.

[AUserName]

I understand your point, but money was just an example. I was generally wondering about "being needy vs the strength of the desire". To me, it feels that if you are not needy or desperate, you don't want it as much.

And also, if to manifest something, you have to put yourself in a position where you feel like you already have it, when it comes to you, you won't get the same initial "wowment", which I know is temporary(though that's a limiting belief in my hologram), but awesome to experience from time to time.

I'm sorry, I don't think I'm expressing myself well enough, but I'm trying.

[ButterflyWoman]

Originally Posted by AUserName

that also takes away a lot of the pleasure from getting what you want

Actually, having something manifest when you've more or less let go and forgotten about it is a complete delight, at least in my experience. Something pops up in your reality and you go, "Oh, yeah! I totally forgot about that! Cool!"

It took me about 25 years to manifest tickets to see the Eagles in concert, but it did happen, and by the time it did, I appreciated it all so much more than I would have otherwise. That's just one example of many, many such instances in my life.

[AUserName]

I'm glad it works well for you, I mean it! But isn't "Oh, yeah! I totally forgot about that! Cool!" the "peaceful gratitude" I was talking about? This is a real question.

Using the ticket analogy(and it's just an example), the kind of feeling I'm going for is the one I felt in the first concert I remember. My mother knew I was totally obsessed with the woman and got us first row tickets. I was around 6 yo and don't recall my pre-concert reactions, but during the whole thing I was LITERALLY paralyzed, my heart was pounding, my eyes and mouth were open and I kept thinking things like "OOOMMMGG, she really iiisss real!" and "She has a birthmark in her arm."(the stage was VERY close). Is that how you felt at the eagles in concert? I was so "wowed", that I didn't even care about the music, I spent 95% of the time wrapping my mind around being so close to my idol.

I ended up not getting what I ultimately wanted, which was to be like a little sister to her(LOL) and if she manifested in my life today, I'd be thinking "Okaaaaay....". I know we can easily reach a middle ground, but I can't imagine a way to have felt like I did in the concert if I wasn't crazily obsessed with the woman. And I really need help with this.

[Zenn]

I think I get where you're at. Personally, I always get wowed with my intentional minifestations because they always come as surprises and hit me with the WOW at realization.

You can always intend for WOW experiences without specification. Just make sure they are benevolent.

[geniegal]

I have a habit of getting over excited so I think I might be able to shed some light on your situation

You really have to experience detachment to fully understand it. I am just starting to be able to detach- not all the time - but it not the same as not caring. Example this morning I did some powerful self hypnosis then started thinking about a network meeting I was going to. Usually in this frame of mind I can confidently predict getting one new client, but today I said to myself "no, more like 2 or 3"... I just felt the power all serene and unshakable.

Well I got 2 small jobs from the meeting. The fulfilment comes not from that outcome I created with my thoughts but from the bigger picture of fulfilling my true power, of being my infinite self . That is the truly exciting thing

[ButterflyWoman]

Originally Posted by geniegal

I have a habit of getting over excited

So do I. It's still a struggle sometimes to let go of stuff.

But when I obsess over things, hold onto them, fiddle them about in my mind, etc., they don't have the opportunity to manifest at all. It's like writing an email and reworking it and reworking it and reworking it and being so concerned with getting it right that you never SEND it....

[SlicK]

Do you know a way to be detached and still enjoy the outcome the same way you would've if you were attached?

I do.

[AUserName]

Thank you Zenn, ButterflyWoman, geniegal and SlicK!!! You're my favorite people in this forum.

You can always intend for WOW experiences without specification. Just make sure they are benevolent.

That's a very good idea. Thanks!

I do.

Hahahahahaha
Care to share?

[SlicK]

Care to share?

The way is to be detached.

You've made a number of confusions, that's why I didn't give you the answer from the beginning. I hoped to make you at least juuuuuust a little bit curious so that you start asking yourself questions. What you think detachment is, is not what you think detachment is. Detachment from the outcome actually makes the favorable outcome even more enjoyable if it does happen. And you know what? Detachment has a "dumb" way to actually make things happen. When you don't need it anymore, you get it. I first really noticed this when I started being detached when going on dates with girls. When I shifted from that needy vibe, attitude, behavior towards an attitude of just going to SEE what happens (not make things happen), just enjoying the moments, no matter the outcome guess what? I enjoy the dates hundreds of times more than when I was attached to the outcome and the outcome is favorable.

It's pretty hard to get this thing. People need, want and are attached to the object of their desire. Then you tell them about how attachment makes things happen. And they get like "Woooow! Cool! I will be detached now so that I get the thing!"; purpose defeated.

As soon as you are detached because you want something to come out of it, you are instantly attached again. Detachment simply has to be for the simple reason of not being attached. You are detached just to be detached. If you have any other reason for detachment then you are not detached. Detachment is a goal by itself, not a tool because if you use it as a tool then you ATTACH it TO SOMETHING.

Detachment has many rewards. But you cannot use Miss Detachment to get another girl because then, she leaves you.

I see no point in being attached to something. What does that bring you? Of course, we taught ourselves to become attached. That means we can also teach ourselves to be detached. And detachment is not ignorance, as some people believe or lack of desire. I can desire something but be like "If I get it I get it, if I don't I don't. The journey is what matters.". It's simply an acknowledgment of the fact that "Hey, I cannot control everything, I cannot have everything, I cannot hold on to everything and I cannot feel good about stuff when I'm attached to it all the time, I just feel fearful of losing it so there's no point in continuing this. Bye!".

And like all the useless things in life, attachment has a way of lying to you that it is useful. An example is the reason you have here in your topic. If you're not attached to an outcome, it makes it less pleasurable. See the lie! Find the truth!

Happy insights to you!

Edit:
Attachment - being fixated on the destination. Feeling bored/bad/stressed that the journey is taking so long. Feeling bad if you don't get to the destination. Enjoying the destination for a little while if you get there. Getting bored with the destination and restarting the process.
Detachment - having a destination in mind. Enjoying the journey. Feeling curious why the journey didn't get you to the destination and learning from it. Being grateful that at least you enjoyed the journey. Feeling grateful for both the journey and the destination. They were both good. Going on another journey, joyfully and curiously.

[Abha]

True detachment is anything but boring. Buddha said, "desire is the cause for all human suffering". If this is true, then the lack of desire would cause the opposite of suffering... so, elation? bliss? pure peace and contentment?

As I understand it, the premise is that everything you do is really to get closer to Self. Humans are trained to look for the contentment you receive when you are connected to Self in sources outside of themselves. But your Self is always present. And the joy and elation you feel when you do something that really gets you going is really the stopping of your thoughts, as your desires are momentarily filled and you experience Self... well... until the next desire kicks in. So detachment allows you to bypass the middle man and experience Self on a regular basis; all the time, if you choose. Lester Levenson once described the feeling as having a thousand orgasms coursing through his body all at once. These results came from fully "correcting" his past; which is really just detaching from all desires (attachments) and aversions; releasing any desire to change the past, releasing all emotions, etc.

I find that it's actually an easy process to do and I'm sure there are many techniques that help you to let go of desires in order to achieve constant bliss. Incidentally, Lester also says that this blissful state with no attachments and no aversions is the state where anything you manifest can come to you with just the thought of it, since there is no resistance to keep it from you.

[Balbrae]

Originally Posted by AUserName

Hi, I'm new here and I hope you can understand my English...

You guys talk a lot about detaching from the outcome and I know that you're right, but that also takes away a lot of the pleasure from getting what you want(at least in my "ignorant knowledge"). Right now, I'm living in a really cool flat that I love and am grateful to live in, but it isn't exciting as it would've been a while ago. I'm "peacefully grateful" about it, which I find comforting, but kind of boring. I feel that I have money coming my way and I'm somewhat bored with the idea too. So, what's the point? I obviously prefer to be bored in a mansion than in a slum, but I'd still be bored.

I wonder if we are trapped in lives of either lack, boredom, or "peaceful gratitude". I don't want, for example, to just be rich and grateful for it, I want to be rich, grateful and "wowed" about it. Do you know a way to be detached and still enjoy the outcome the same way you would've if you were attached?

Thank you. xoxox

Welcome to our forum, A User Name!

You are correct to observe that there is a tension between the idea of the wanting something enough to intend its manifestation and "detachment." You are discerning to ask: what's the point of detachment if I want something to manifest? It defeats the purpose.

So I echo your sentiment and make the following offering:

For me, detachment simply means: continue with the good vibes of visualizing and believing in the manifestation of your intention, without straying into the obsessive vibes of wondering where the heck it is. Successful "detachment" results from reducing or eliminating resistance. So, if someone is constantly fretting, "where's my stuff, already!" then that sends a signal of doubt, which pushes its manifestation farther away. All detachment really means is the attitude: "I got this manifestation in the bag, no need to fret over it's arrival." However, that doesn't mean that you can't continue enjoying your visualization of your intended manifestation for the joy and fun of it!

I gave further discussion of this point in response to another thread, started by another member, entitled: When do you let go of your visualization?
To save time here, I simply paste an excerpt of that response here:

Originally Posted by Balbrae

The theory of adopting a posture of detachment over one's visualization of an intended manifestation is to demonstrate to the Universe that one is not obsessing over the arrival of the manifestation. The theory goes that obsessing over the arrival of the manifestation--taking the Universe's temperature over and over again--signals to the Universe that one is beginning to doubt the arrival will ever come. Then, that doubt becomes the dominant mental impression one radiates outward, manifesting the counterpart to doubt, which frequently is the non-arrival or delay of the manifestation, depending on the circumstances and the strength of the doubt.

However, not all re-living of a visualization is born of nagging doubt. Let me give you an example. I have a visualization of a private island I own in a different dimension, I named it Willis Island. Now, I visualize having fun on that island all the time. I will never run out of joy in partaking in that visualization. I am not simply visualizing "getting the island," but the activities that occur on Willis Island, which change over time, through different seasons. Never once have I doubted that Willis Island will break down the barriers to this dimension--it is making its way to me right now! I still visualize all the time how much fun I have in that tropical paradise! I see it this way: I know it will arrive, and I am not visualizing it any more for the "purpose" of manifesting it, per se. I visualize it because I love it, and want to be near it and on it, all the time. Together, we have great fun, Willis Island and I do! Since my lovely manifestation is arriving in my dimension, according to its timetable, I don't let that separate us. So, I choose to arrive in Willis Island's dimension according to my timetable, which is now, and several days a week! I am showing love and respect for Willis Island, to not let simple mechanical laws governing the separation of dimensions come between us. I am committed to Willis Island, and I don't begrudge it for not yet being here in this dimension.

So I would ask you: how do you feel, when you partake of your visualization? If you feel wonderful, as I do, then why stop? In fact, I think an artificial stopping, out of fear that one is not "detaching" correctly, also can send a signal of doubt to the Universe. It's like saying, "they told me not to do this, or else I will block the manifestation of my intention because they told me that I have to do something else, called 'letting go and detaching,' or else, I will be demonstrating to the Universe a sort of obsessive-compulsive disorder regarding my intended-visualization. That's what they told me. They must know something about me and my manifestation that I don't. Oh, darn..."

After a while, one could obsess about the prospect of obsessing. However, your feelings will not betray you. They will tell you whether your dominant mental impression is in or out of vibrational harmony with the manifestation of your intention. If you feel bored, listless, tired, impatient, sad, angry, disillusioned, embarrassed--any of the negative feelings, then you probably could benefit from dropping the visualization and "just trusting" the Universe. If, however, you feel as I do: enthused, animated, and happy, then you could probably benefit from continuing to partake in your bliss.

I think too much is made of "rules," that may work for some people, but not others. I say trust your instinct and "go with the flow," as Abraham was fond of instructing us to do (i.e., paddle down stream, not upstream). Now, if you're not sure, then just ask your unconscious mind to give you a sign or an answer.

It all worked out beautifully for you! You're awesome!

Anyhow, best of manifestations to you!

[Balbrae]

Originally Posted by Abha

True detachment is anything but boring. Buddha said, "desire is the cause for all human suffering". If this is true, then the lack of desire would cause the opposite of suffering... so, elation? bliss? pure peace and contentment?

As I understand it, the premise is that everything you do is really to get closer to Self. Humans are trained to look for the contentment you receive when you are connected to Self in sources outside of themselves. But your Self is always present. And the joy and elation you feel when you do something that really gets you going is really the stopping of your thoughts, as your desires are momentarily filled and you experience Self... well... until the next desire kicks in. So detachment allows you to bypass the middle man and experience Self on a regular basis; all the time, if you choose. Lester Levenson once described the feeling as having a thousand orgasms coursing through his body all at once. These results came from fully "correcting" his past; which is really just detaching from all desires (attachments) and aversions; releasing any desire to change the past, releasing all emotions, etc.

I find that it's actually an easy process to do and I'm sure there are many techniques that help you to let go of desires in order to achieve constant bliss. Incidentally, Lester also says that this blissful state with no attachments and no aversions is the state where anything you manifest can come to you with just the thought of it, since there is no resistance to keep it from you.

Hi, Abha:

I was really into Buddhism for a while. I sensed that the Buddhist truth: "all things become unsatisfactory," did not work so well for me. In essence, I found myself bland and mimimalistic--the exact opposite of the lush opulence of LoA theory.

Good naturedly, Abraham once poked a little fun at the Buddhist idea that one should strive to eliminate desire. In this regard, Abraham noted that the desire to end desire is a desire. But I am happy it works for you. Cheers!

[Zenn]

I don't think LOA is a lush opulent theory. It has been marketed to appeal to the common desires of wealth and loving relationships and mostly so applied because of lack of such. I find a lot of spiritualism in the ideology and it has led me down the path to enlightenment. While I desire great amount of money, it's for my purpose in life while I am already grateful of my daily life. I've been able to eat well, dress well, and have a good home even in the worst financial times, the kind that drive people to desperation and breakdowns. In previous hard times, I worried and got stressed out like most but since learning LOA, a name I don't like BTW, nothing bothers me. I just enjoy each moment as it comes. I can't say I'm 100% detached but getting there. When you realize how blessed you really are and appreciate every blessing with gratitude, all the desires are icing on the cake, more to be grateful for but there is no deprivation with or without them manifested at this moment. They are WOWs when they show up.

[lycan]

Originally Posted by Balbrae

Hi, Abha:

I was really into Buddhism for a while. I sensed that the Buddhist truth: "all things become unsatisfactory," did not work so well for me. In essence, I found myself bland and mimimalistic--the exact opposite of the lush opulence of LoA theory.

Buddha's father was the enlightened one. The story of Buddah is the story of the fall of man. It is a tragedy. It is also a cautionary tale and the path back.

[AUserName]

Thank you Abha, Balbrae, lycan and everybody I already named.

This thread is surprising me, it made me think and it was even awkward at one time.

Welcome to our forum, A User Name!

Anyhow, best of manifestations to you!

Awwnn! Thank you!


Not sure what to say to everybody, so, I'll come back later.

[Balbrae]

Originally Posted by Zenn

I don't think LOA is a lush opulent theory. It has been marketed to appeal to the common desires of wealth and loving relationships and mostly so applied because of lack of such. I find a lot of spiritualism in the ideology and it has led me down the path to enlightenment. While I desire great amount of money, it's for my purpose in life while I am already grateful of my daily life. I've been able to eat well, dress well, and have a good home even in the worst financial times, the kind that drive people to desperation and breakdowns. In previous hard times, I worried and got stressed out like most but since learning LOA, a name I don't like BTW, nothing bothers me. I just enjoy each moment as it comes. I can't say I'm 100% detached but getting there. When you realize how blessed you really are and appreciate every blessing with gratitude, all the desires are icing on the cake, more to be grateful for but there is no deprivation with or without them manifested at this moment. They are WOWs when they show up.

Very happy for you! Sounds like your life is truly magical!