Don't Forget to Break the Habit of Forming Ill-Serving Thoughts When Changing Beliefs

[Balbrae]

Introduction: John Assaraf's Books

I've been listening to a couple of audio books by John Assaraf: (1) The Answer, Grow Any Business, Achieve Financial Freedom, and Live an Extraordinary Life; and (2) Having it All, Achieving Your Life's Goals and Dreams. There was a brilliant point raised in these books, that I have overlooked my entire life. The point is this: it is not enough for one to eradicate one's ill-serving, limiting belief; one must also eradicate the mental habit of forming (or re-forming) that thought.

A Two-Step Approach

It works like this. Say, you have formed the ill-serving belief that you are not worthy of a promotion at work because others are more deserving than you, have been there longer than you have, or are more aggressive and "cut-throat" than you are, such that they will inevitably "out-compete" you for the job. Then, let's say that you discovered this ill-serving belief, and so you root it out by changing your belief system on this point. You do so, simply by repeating affirmations over and over again to form a new belief. (Recall that Abraham taught: a belief is just something you say to yourself over and over and over again. So you can "turn the tables" on this phenomenon, to undo a belief, by simply saying something new, over and over and over again.)

Then, once you have replaced the dis-serving belief with a well-serving belief/affirmation (e.g., "I deserved this promotion that I received," or "I was here long enough to merit this great promotion," or "I did not need not be aggressive, cut-throat, or overly competitive, when I received this wonderful promotion, which came effortlessly to me"), take care to protect it! This means that you shouldn't overlook that you have historically formed the mental habit of self-deprecation, which mental habit of thinking should be broken, lest you put yourself back in the same place you were before, giving new life to the old beliefs that you just dismantled! (E.g.,"I better be subservient to others at work, lest they think I am not cooperative, or that I am stepping out of line, which might get me fired.") So, in addition to changing the core belief about being worthy or likely to get the promotion, you must also dismantle the mental habit of processing information at work in such a manner that you exalt others and put yourself down. You would dismantle this habit by: (1) being aware of it; and then (2) substituting the ill-serving thoughts with well-serving thoughts--on the fly, whenever they occur. You may also visit the "core" beliefs that give rise to such ill-serving mental habits. For me, such a core belief might historically have been along the lines of "I am open-minded and consider my own weaknesses constantly to maintain open-mindedness and humility, which makes me more spiritual and evolved. It is a virtue to put myself down, so I don't ever become arrogant." One could change any such core belief to something like: "being open-minded does not mean that I host a "free-for-all" to put myself down, nor does it mean that I need to exalt others at my degradation. Being open-minded means seeing my goodness and perfection--being open to it." In this regard, Seth urged one to stop putting oneself down, by repeating the truth: "I am an equal, adult human being."

The Parable of Phil's Boat

Assaraf uses scientific-sounding explanations for this phenomon, "neural reprogramming," under the scientific theory of "neuro-plasticity." And the example he gives is a wonderful one: Phil bought a new, high-tech power boat, and he took his friends out fishing. They headed due west, but were not catching any fish. His friends said, "Hey, Phil, let's head south, instead--there are bound to be more fish there." Phil went up to the boat's pilot control center and turned the "steering wheel" of the boat, changing course for due south. He walked back to the rear of the boat to join his friends, when he noticed the boat was not heading due south, as he commanded. Instead, the boat was headed due west again. Frustrated, Phil ran back to the pilot control center and turned the steering wheel 90 degrees to the left, again--setting the course for due south. By the time Phil walked to the back of the boat again to join his friends, they pointed out that the boat was heading due west again, not south. For the third time, Phil went back and changed the direction of the boat, this time over-correcting the "steering wheel": due southeast, figuring that should more than cover it. But upon reaching his friends, Phil was blown away again to see that the boat was headed due west. Embarrassed, angry, and frustrated, Phil was at a complete loss to understand what was wrong with his brand new boat. He went back to the pilot control center a fourth time, not really knowing what he would do. At that point, Phil's friend, who had accompanied Phil back to the pilot control center, said, "Hey Phil, did you remember to over-ride and reset the navigation system's auto-correct setting?" Phil responded, "My what?" Phil did not even know that his boat had an "auto-correct," navigational feature, which automatically returned the boat to the original, programmed direction (due west). Every time Phil changed course, his auto-correct feature automatically "corrected" the boat from being "off course," by changing the boat's direction back to due west. Phil was happy to learn that, and he readjusted the "auto correct" feature, and this time, his boat obligingly traveled due South! I embellish John Assaraf's story by saying, they all caught lots of fish in that southerly direction and lived happily ever after!

Conclusion: Make it Work for You!

Now, by using this parable of Phil's boat, John Assaraf explained that it is not enough to change our direction in life, we must also reprogram our "auto-correct" features, which are seated in our non-conscious mind. Each of these "auto-correct" features govern each of of the many thousands of beliefs we hold! These auto-correct features work very much like a thermostat works to return the temperature of one's house to a certain level. These auto-correct features are commonly known as our behavioral "set points." One must change our "set points," in order to see lasting change in our life. For example, one cannot sustain receiving millions of dollars in annual income, if one's supporting affirmations, visualizations, and actions taken are negated by the contradictory "thermostat" belief that one is worth only $57,000 in annual income. One must change one's "thermostat" to a higher setting of annual income. But, the critical point here is that, in addition to changing the thermostat, one must also break the mental-habit of creating (re-creating) a lower thermostat setting. So I now see that my job is twofold: (1) I must remove my ill-serving beliefs, including by resetting my low thermostat settings to a higher level; and (2) I must break my mental habits of forming certain thoughts that do not serve me, that would have the effect of moving my thermostat setting back to the lower position. I am grateful to have learned this nuanced perspective.

[Now123]

Originally Posted by Balbrae

Introduction: John Assaraf's Books

I've been listening to a couple of audio books by John Assaraf: (1) The Answer, Grow Any Business, Achieve Financial Freedom, and Live an Extraordinary Life; and (2) Having it All, Achieving Your Life's Goals and Dreams. There was a brilliant point raised in these books, that I have overlooked my entire life. The point is this: it is not enough for one to eradicate one's ill-serving, limiting belief; one must also eradicate the mental habit of forming (or re-forming) that thought.

A Two-Step Approach

It works like this. Say, you have formed the ill-serving belief that you are not worthy of a promotion at work because others are more deserving than you, have been there longer than you have, or are more aggressive and "cut-throat" than you are, such that they will inevitably "out-compete" you for the job. Then, let's say that you discovered this ill-serving belief, and so you root it out by changing your belief system on this point. You do so, simply by repeating affirmations over and over again to form a new belief. (Recall that Abraham taught: a belief is just something you say to yourself over and over and over again. So you can "turn the tables" on this phenomenon, to undo a belief, by simply saying something new, over and over and over again.)

Then, once you have replaced the dis-serving belief with a well-serving belief/affirmation (e.g., "I deserved this promotion that I received," or "I was here long enough to merit this great promotion," or "I did not need not be aggressive, cut-throat, or overly competitive, when I received this wonderful promotion, which came effortlessly to me"), take care to protect it! This means that you shouldn't overlook that you have historically formed the mental habit of self-deprecation, which mental habit of thinking should be broken, lest you put yourself back in the same place you were before, giving new life to the old beliefs that you just dismantled! (E.g.,"I better be subservient to others at work, lest they think I am not cooperative, or that I am stepping out of line, which might get me fired.") So, in addition to changing the core belief about being worthy or likely to get the promotion, you must also dismantle the mental habit of processing information at work in such a manner that you exalt others and put yourself down. You would dismantle this habit by: (1) being aware of it; and then (2) substituting the ill-serving thoughts with well-serving thoughts--on the fly, whenever they occur. You may also visit the "core" beliefs that give rise to such ill-serving mental habits. For me, such a core belief might historically have been along the lines of "I am open-minded and consider my own weaknesses constantly to maintain open-mindedness and humility, which makes me more spiritual and evolved. It is a virtue to put myself down, so I don't ever become arrogant." One could change any such core belief to something like: "being open-minded does not mean that I host a "free-for-all" to put myself down, nor does it mean that I need to exalt others at my degradation. Being open-minded means seeing my goodness and perfection--being open to it." In this regard, Seth urged one to stop putting oneself down, by repeating the truth: "I am an equal, adult human being."

The Parable of Phil's Boat

Assaraf uses scientific-sounding explanations for this phenomon, "neural reprogramming," under the scientific theory of "neuro-plasticity." And the example he gives is a wonderful one: Phil bought a new, high-tech power boat, and he took his friends out fishing. They headed due west, but were not catching any fish. His friends said, "Hey, Phil, let's head south, instead--there are bound to be more fish there." Phil went up to the boat's pilot control center and turned the "steering wheel" of the boat, changing course for due south. He walked back to the rear of the boat to join his friends, when he noticed the boat was not heading due south, as he commanded. Instead, the boat was headed due west again. Frustrated, Phil ran back to the pilot control center and turned the steering wheel 90 degrees to the left, again--setting the course for due south. By the time Phil walked to the back of the boat again to join his friends, they pointed out that the boat was heading due west again, not south. For the third time, Phil went back and changed the direction of the boat, this time over-correcting the "steering wheel": due southeast, figuring that should more than cover it. But upon reaching his friends, Phil was blown away again to see that the boat was headed due west. Embarrassed, angry, and frustrated, Phil was at a complete loss to understand what was wrong with his brand new boat. He went back to the pilot control center a fourth time, not really knowing what he would do. At that point, Phil's friend, who had accompanied Phil back to the pilot control center, said, "Hey Phil, did you remember to over-ride and reset the navigation system's auto-correct setting?" Phil responded, "My what?" Phil did not even know that his boat had an "auto-correct," navigational feature, which automatically returned the boat to the original, programmed direction (due west). Every time Phil changed course, his auto-correct feature automatically "corrected" the boat from being "off course," by changing the boat's direction back to due west. Phil was happy to learn that, and he readjusted the "auto correct" feature, and this time, his boat obligingly traveled due South! I embellish John Assaraf's story by saying, they all caught lots of fish in that southerly direction and lived happily ever after!

Conclusion: Make it Work for You!

Now, by using this parable of Phil's boat, John Assaraf explained that it is not enough to change our direction in life, we must also reprogram our "auto-correct" features, which are seated in our non-conscious mind. Each of these "auto-correct" features govern each of of the many thousands of beliefs we hold! These auto-correct features work very much like a thermostat works to return the temperature of one's house to a certain level. These auto-correct features are commonly known as our behavioral "set points." One must change our "set points," in order to see lasting change in our life. For example, one cannot sustain receiving millions of dollars in annual income, if one's supporting affirmations, visualizations, and actions taken are negated by the contradictory "thermostat" belief that one is worth only $57,000 in annual income. One must change one's "thermostat" to a higher setting of annual income. But, the critical point here is that, in addition to changing the thermostat, one must also break the mental-habit of creating (re-creating) a lower thermostat setting. So I now see that my job is twofold: (1) I must remove my ill-serving beliefs, including by resetting my low thermostat settings to a higher level; and (2) I must break my mental habits of forming certain thoughts that do not serve me, that would have the effect of moving my thermostat setting back to the lower position. I am grateful to have learned this nuanced perspective.

So basically nuke all negative thoughts (small or large) and replace them with positive thoughts.

[Balbrae]

Originally Posted by Now123

So basically nuke all negative thoughts (small or large) and replace them with positive thoughts.

That's the short of it. But breaking mental habits requires ongoing attentiveness, not a one-time nuke.

[Now123]

Originally Posted by Balbrae

That's the short of it. But breaking mental habits requires ongoing attentiveness, not a one-time nuke.

question.

for those who have yet to recieve their desired outcome, should they overwrite everything. Ive seen poor results working on just focusing on the desired outcome and avoiding any blueprint about it.

An example would be I want an ideal GF.

What thoughts should I work on first? or should I just multitask every thounght pertaining to the goal? which thoughts should I reject and pay little attention to. Should I reject the entire blueprint?

Thoughts:

"Im at school and I spot the girl of my dreams."

"Im approaching her, or she approaches me"

"I will get this girl to like me by playing it cool"

"Im now talking to this girls, we seem to hit it off."

"Winning I got a date with this girl now."

"The date is going well"

"OMG its official were a couple"

"XXX"

"it feels great being with her, her personality is awesome. this is how it should be"