"Feel Good" propaganda is BS!!!! it bites you in the a**

[bmlyeryk]

sorry my language and sorry if im complaining. i might have overreacted in this situation but im pretty sensitive

ive discovered a trend over the past few years that everythime i actually feel good or happy for once (which is rare) it gets negated with something bad and then im depressed and bitter again

and today happened to be a day where i was starting to feel good (i was not pretending or forcing it) and once again, i shouldve known i get another sarcastic "hi.. hi.. hi.. hi" from a stranger. i dont know who these goddam people are but they all seem to know who i am and start mistreating/being rude to me b/c im an outcast quiet nobody. ignoring them doesnt work, neither does cursing back or responding at all. im completely defenselss in this sitation and i have no friends to fall back on, its like me against the rest of the world everytime im happy! im starting to realize its unsafe for me to feel good anymore, b/c more if this might happen. it has been worse in grade school but i thought it shouldve ended long ago. i have no contact with those people from school anymore but still STRANGERS (my age group or younger) will start being rude once in a while.
i know its stupid to get depressed over a [fake] "hi" but i take things perosnally and its a personal attack on my part. i know thats one thing that reinforces the fact that i "dont deserve" what i want b/c ill get attacked for being happy OMG


today i was going to start "scripting" what i want to happen, but i canceleld that b/c im bitter now and afraid it wont work. ill never get to like myself or make any friends ever when evryone already knows how quiet and 'different' i am. having only enemies and nasty skin diseases doesnt help my thinknig i deserve what i want

i dont want to be a lone nobody b/c my future aspirations needs me to be with people but how is that supposed to even work. outside evidence is always the opposite. and i dont know any 'belief technique" that will work, doesnt sound wise to convince myself im lucky if these attacks can happen again
my dreams seem impossible, feels like im destined to be alone

FEELING GOOD = nonsense! it might work on other people but it sure does not create miracles for me. is the only option to stay depressed and hope that creates a miracle?

i am sorry i got depressed and made another useless post. i want to make LOA work for me but it keeps backfiring esp when i "feel good" (i dont fake it). it just doesnt look like what i want to happen ever will


is there anything i can do without having to worry about getting "punished" for being happy?! at least to never again get assaulted like this!

[loapatti]

Sorry you are feeling so bad! I use to take every slight-imagined or real to heart. Especially when I was very young. I would be made fun of by school mates and even strangers about my looks. It was very hurtful almost every day to be assaulted emotionally like that. It would even drive me to thoughts of suicide. What I would tell myself (long before I even knew about LOA or anything like that) I would give myself a pep talk and say it won't always be like this and I would tell myself to give it one more day. Then another day became another day and so on. Things did get better, in fact, they got great.

I developed more self esteem and confidence and instead of running from bullies, I would say "who are you to judge me"? Even if I couldn't say it to them directly, I would say it in my head. Now whenever anyone is rude to me or says something to diss or put me down, I think
"wow there is something wrong with them". Whereas before, I would cry and say "what is wrong with me".

So try not to internalize their rudeness to much. Start believing that "they" have a problem socializing and being friendly to people. I say hi to people all the time and there are those that don't say it back even. I just shrug and move on.

Hey, if you don't like me then get out of my way so someone who does can get through.

[Acting Like Godot]

Someone said "Hi" to you ... and you become upset. Wow, that's amazing.

[Criseyde]

What makes you feel like people saying "hi" to you is depressing?

[bmlyeryk]

b/c they dont say it in a friendly way! they say it in a patronizing tone b/c they know i am unsociable! and that wasnt the only thing people said to me, there were worse things.

great help im getting here

[Acting Like Godot]

Well, that shows you are indeed very powerful in creating your own reality.

Someone you don't even know said "Hi!" to you, and using the amazing power of your thoughts, you have transformed the single-syllable, two-letter word into evidence that the person is rude, you're an outcast, the world is against you, you're completely defenseless and you're a quiet nobody!

It's been said that imagination is really key in the use of the LOA, and wow, you illustrate it so well.

Imagine what would happen if the person said to you: "Hey there. How are you getting on? Try to smile and be happy, the sun is shining and every day is a new day."

You'd probably see the guy as a potential rapist or terrorist ....

[TheLovelyBang]

There is something you can do. Become confident about it. That worked for me today.

Last night I was doubting myself, then, as soon as I let myself have fun, and started to become more confident in what I know to be true, something happend. A miracle.

You can have them too, just remember that If you know something to be true, no one can tell you otherwise.

Im not religious, but when it comes to meditation/IM/LOA I would compare myself to a hardcore christian.

Nothing can ever penetrate their skulls when it comes to their god, and you should be the same way about yourself, and the universe. Just make sure you dont over do it, or become cocky. Laugh.

[ButterflyWoman]

Originally Posted by bmlyeryk

sorry if im complaining

No, you're not sorry. Think about it.

Originally Posted by bmlyeryk

ive discovered a trend over the past few years that everythime i actually feel good or happy for once (which is rare) it gets negated with something bad and then im depressed and bitter again

Self-fulfilling prophecy, it seems.

Originally Posted by bmlyeryk

i take things perosnally and its a personal attack on my part

You're right. It IS on your part.

Originally Posted by bmlyeryk

today i was going to start "scripting" what i want to happen, but i canceleld that b/c im bitter now and afraid it wont work

Do you see this self-sabotage? "Someone said something to me that I decided to take as a personal attack and now I'm not going to do anything to improve my life and I'm going to be unhappy and depressed. And it's all their fault!" On some level, you get some kind of self-reward for being angry, bitter, and afraid. You need to find out what that's about.

Originally Posted by bmlyeryk

FEELING GOOD = nonsense!

Yeah, you're right. It feels WAY better to be pissed off and hurt and angry and afraid. Life is a lot more enjoyable that way.

Look, I don't want to be unkind, and I hope I don't come across that way, but you're doing all this to yourself, and you're cutting off your own nose to spite your face.

Originally Posted by bmlyeryk

i am sorry i got depressed

I don't think you are sorry. I think you're so used to feeling that way that you deliberately keep yourself there. Feeling good clearly scares the crap out of you.

I spent most of my life in the exact state you're describing. Thinking everything was an attack, getting miserable for no real reason, sabotaging my own well-being and happiness. It's not an easy worldview to break out of, and it'll take some work, but it can be done. The first thing you're going to have to do, though, is realise that you are the one creating all this drama, and you are the one sabotaging yourself.

[elucidate]

Originally Posted by CaterpillarWoman

I don't think you are sorry. I think you're so used to feeling that way that you deliberately keep yourself there. Feeling good clearly scares the crap out of you.

When I went through this, and upon some introspection I discovered that there was a belief I had that I did not deserve to feel good. I think lots of people operate from this belief and don't even realize it.

I spent most of my life in the exact state you're describing. Thinking everything was an attack, getting miserable for no real reason, sabotaging my own well-being and happiness. It's not an easy worldview to break out of, and it'll take some work, but it can be done. The first thing you're going to have to do, though, is realise that you are the one creating all this drama, and you are the one sabotaging yourself.

Yes, not easy to break out of at all, but not impossible, and probably preferable to staying where you are at, eh?

[Riverstone]

Think of it as a test from the universe. The universe wants to check whether you truly are at the vibrational level you think and hope to be. If you react to it like you always have then you still have more to learn, if however, you start to respond in another way then that shows you have made a change.
The universe sends us opportunities, it is up to us, it is our choice how to respond to them.

[Reefs]

@bmlyeryk

Seems you are trying the great leap forward. That never works. LOA will work against you. Your negative momentum is just too strong. Little baby steps will do it.

[MagicalRealist]

Originally Posted by bmlyeryk

[SIZE="3"]ive discovered a trend over the past few years that everythime i actually feel good or happy for once (which is rare) it gets negated with something bad and then im depressed and bitter again

Because you weren't truly happy. Yes, you had a brief experience of feeling okay, but underneath it? No. You're still depressed and bitter and see yourself as a victim. You're a fundamentally unhappy person with persistently negative thought patterns, despite the occasional positive feelings you have. And until you address that, genuine happiness--happiness as a state of being--will elude you. You'll feel good for a little while, then something will happen to knock it over because there's no foundation beneath it. True happiness is the foundation.

i know its stupid to get depressed over a [fake] "hi" but i take things perosnally and its a personal attack on my part. i know thats one thing that reinforces the fact that i "dont deserve" what i want b/c ill get attacked for being happy OMG

So maybe it's time to learn how to stop taking things so personally, and to stop placing yourself in the role of victim. Because as long as you go through life defining yourself as an outcast, a nobody, defenseless, always treated rudely, and clinging to these ideas about yourself, happiness is going to remain out of reach.

Okay, some dude gave you a sarcastic greeting. Why does this have to be such a big deal? Why does this have the power to completely wreck your day? Why does this destroy your ability to enjoy some happiness? He's just being an idiot--and that's his problem. Why does it have to have anything at all to do with you?

Frankly, I can't help but wonder whether people are always so rude to you, or whether you simply perceive them that way because you're so hypersensitive and go through life expecting to be picked on and insulted. But it doesn't really matter--you're so wrapped up in being a victim and an outcast, seeing the world through s***-colored glasses, that you'll see the world accordingly, no matter what people actually do.

Re-training yourself to perceive the world differently, to consciously choose your emotional state, and to respond to negative events without getting caught up in so much drama is possible. It takes time, patience, practice, and commitment--because what you are doing is re-wiring the neural pathways in the brain--but it can be done.

Look, I was a bullied kid in school, and for many years as an adult I was prickly, defensive, bitter, and easily offended. I couldn't walk into a room where people were laughing without automatically assuming they were laughing about me (even when I knew, rationally, that they weren't). A rude remark from someone could wreck me for weeks. My inability to be happy or get ahead in life was because other people were jerks, ***holes, morons, and bullies. So your post here? Yeah, that was me.

Eventually, I got over it. It took me years, and if I'd actually known what I was doing it would have worked much faster, but it did work. I don't have the same reactions to things that used to trigger extreme emotional responses; these days, they're either insignificant, or I just don't experience them at all. I find that people are, for the most part, friendly and decent, and the occasional rude one doesn't bother me. My prevailing emotional state is calm--I rarely get angry or upset anymore, and even when I do it's never such a big deal or so long-lasting as it was.

My life changed. Your life can change. But you have to teach yourself to think in a completely different way, replacing your current ideas of yourself and the world with completely different ones, and I'm not going to blow sunshine up your backside by telling you that's a quick, easy thing to do.

FEELING GOOD = nonsense! it might work on other people but it sure does not create miracles for me. is the only option to stay depressed and hope that creates a miracle?

You want a miracle that transforms your life, but you honestly don't expect or believe you can have one. Which is understandable, and even perfectly reasonable. So rather than claim it doesn't work because your miracle hasn't shown up, or retreat back into depressive victimhood, consider taking smaller, more gradual steps toward improving your mindset.

i want to make LOA work for me but it keeps backfiring esp when i "feel good" (i dont fake it).

The LoA brings you exactly you put out. It's not backfiring, at all--it's working just fine. Faking good feelings doesn't work--you know they're fake, and your patterns of thought and emotion reflect that. (And I do find it interesting that you're faking good feelings, then getting so bent out of shape over a "fake" greeting from someone. You're putting out fake, and it's coming right back to you!)

You have to honestly, genuinely feel good. And coming from your current state of mind? Truly feeling good may be out of your reach at the moment. However, you can work on creating a state of mind that allows you to feel better, and gradually step things up until one day you realize that feeling good is your new state of being. There are lot of steps between the sub-sub-sub-sub-basement you're living in now and the 60th-floor penthouse suite, and it's not all-or-nothing. If you can manage to get yourself up to the lobby, where there's daylight, that would be a huge improvement.

[guthrio]

Originally Posted by bmlyeryk

[SIZE="3"]sorry my language and sorry if im complaining. i might have overreacted in this situation but im pretty sensitive

is there anything i can do without having to worry about getting "punished" for being happy?! at least to never again get assaulted like this!

Bmlyeryk,

Consider that everything you've cited in your entire narrative, above this question, is about what you fear happening...word for word. And each emphatic declaration of the justifications for your fears is what is being reflected back to you by the Universe....just as emphatically. And that's a GOOD THING ! Why ??

LIFE IS A MIRROR !

You CAN'T change the reflection in the mirror (consequence)......

....YOU CAN ONLY CHANGE WHAT’S CAUSING the reflection IN the mirror.....YOU, YOURSELF....by your choices !

We have control over the choices.....perfectly.

Life controls the consequences....perfectly.

What you say to yourself SUBJECTIVELY….is what gets expressed (i.e. reflected AS YOUR LIFE!) OBJECTIVELY !!

Life doesn't TELL you that your choice is amiss.

Life SHOWS YOU that your choice is amiss....with the consequences.

Life doesn't TELL you that you hit the target.

Life SHOWS YOU that you hit the target...with the consequences.

It is the real meaning behind "Ye shall reap what you sow"....for good or ill, as YOU choose....perfectly !

Please also consider a perspective from an unusual source, excerpted below. Fear leads to knowledge of yourself that you can then use to realign yourself....to balance. And with due deference to Franklin D. Roosevelt's oft-repeated axiom about the subject of fear...

As so utilized.....there is then nothing TO fear....not even fear, itself....

QUOTE:
I will give you, for now, one more important definition: Fear.
Fear, fear, fear, fear, fear,
been your friend for a long time.
If you were to treat it like a friend,
you would get more out of it.

Fear... pay attention... fear...
is your natural true vibration filtered through a belief system
that is out of tune with your true, core self.
Excitement is your natural vibration filtered through a belief system
that is in alignment with your natural, true, core self.
Fear and excitement are the same energy...
you experience them differently because of what you filter them through.

Analogy: You have on your planet
the occupation referred to as "piano tuners".
When you are playing your piano instrument,
and you find the sound of the music pleasing,
and then all of a sudden you come across
what you call a sour note, "plunk... plunk... plunk... plunk"
Do you run away in panic and go and hide in the closet?
"I shall never touch my piano again!"
No. You say, "Ah, I require to tune the piano,
so that the note becomes harmonious with all the other notes."

Each key is like unto a definition... a belief.
When you come across one that gives you the sensation of fear,
all that's telling you is, "Hey... hey, hey, hey, hey, hey... pay attention,
you have a belief in this area of your song
that is out of alignment with the whole rest of the piano".
Fine tune it... bring it back into harmony... don't run away... explore it:
"Bonk, bonk, bonk, bonk, bonk... what would I have to do to tune this?
How would I have to redefine it?
How would I have to tighten this string
in order to bring it back into tune... into alignment?
Play with it... find out until finally,
"Bonk, bonk, bonk, bonk, bonk... it's back.

Explore what that definition is that allows you to feel
your very own energy in the mode called fear,
because also the paradox is (and paradox is a very powerful tool),
when you make a friend of your fear, "Ah-hah, a fear... oh joy!",
when you know your fear is there to tell you
something you want to know... you will invite it in,
and miraculously, instantly... your fear will vanish,
because you will have transformed it into... first, curiosity:
"What could this mean?" and then joy,
by being willing to explore what it means for you.

That is how you use fear,
fear is just a knock at the door:
"Pay attention to this...
this is something you want to know about yourself,
this is something you need to know to integrate within yourself,
to become more of who you are".
And wouldn't that be fun? Of course.

So, pay attention to the fear... don't ignore it... feel it,
by all means feel it as fully as you can
and then dive in to the unknown... dive into the fear,
let it wash through you... feel all the sensations that go along with it
and then let your fear ignite you... ignite your burning curiosity,
"What could this possibly mean... what definition would I have to believe in in order to experience my own energy in this way,
what could it be, I wonder?

Then, explore... find out what you believe,
find out what kind of definitions you have about reality,
and rewrite them... reinvent them... redefine them,
be creative, use your imagination... that's what it's for.

UNQUOTE

There is really only ONE way to get over the wish to "control things"....and that is with ANOTHER idea.

How ??

The idea I'm about to show you ALONE can completely change your world, and everything you've believed....THAT'S HOW POWERFUL IDEAS ARE ! Ready? Here it is:

"If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change."
- Dr Wayne Dyer

And it works......perfectly

Hope this, and the sources below, help....


Source(s):

The Fundamentals | Transcripts

Life and Teaching of the Masters of the Far East
Volumes 1 - 6 by Baird T. Spalding

Ideas Are Always Free

[Dulma]

You need a wake up call. Your post is oozing with defeatist, pessimistic, self-pitying energy. I'm not saying that's who YOU are but that seems to be the primary rut in which you are stuck.

A good place for you to start here would be to try to separate these thoughts from who you are. Like when you start thinking this self-perpetuating cycle of "everything sucks" thoughts, rather than feed them with more thoughts, take a minute and breathe. Allow the thoughts space to inhabit your mind without letting them take over your identity.

When one is in a deeply negative state, it can be so easy to find logical reasons to counter every word of advice, so you may feel the urge to disagree with me with rational explanations of why you are justified in your feelings and how they really are insurmountable to you, etc. etc. I've been there, we all have. But instead of doing all of that, see if you can play a game: just breathe when it happens. It's so simple. And just allow yourself to feel your breath fully, with every fiber of your body. It will start to feel really sweet and really good. A subtle joy may even arise in you.

I'm not telling you "feel good" propaganda. I'm just suggesting you relax and breathe. But take caution not to try to force yourself to breathe with the aim of becoming happy or transforming everything. Putting pressure on it will make things worse and more frustrating.

Because if I respond to your post with agreement, I'm helping contribute to your pity party. If I respond with compassion and say "no no, it's not B.S., it will work, keep doing it!" then you'll find reasons against what I say and be more frustrated.

But I know how you're feeling and I know despair can be addictive. But allow yourself to feel those feelings, accept the pain instead of resisting it so much. Something great might happen.

[pyrogen]

Your post is proof that LOA results are shallow for altering the outside alone. You have to work on what is inside.

Methods like the Abraham-Hicks processes are great if you are basically on even keel and occasionally need help coming up into a higher state. If you're generally a morose, negative and fault finding person, then you have to work on that.

And no, "positive" does not mean you are Polyanna in a manic state. it does not mean divorcing from reality.

Actually, a perfectly good operational state is "contentedness"... Where you are generally on an even keel and can respond fluidly to anything life throws your way.

The ultimate aim isn't just to be able to wish a million dollars to drop out of the sky, but to transform yourself into the kind of person who makes things happen in their life.

[Bradshaw]

MagicalRealist's advice is very good.

There's no foundation for your happiness. You can't possible inject fluffy happiness into yourself and expect it to transform all the negativity you've piled up for decades over night.

Happiness isn't this fragile thing that breaks down every time something disturbs it. You are missing the most important pillar of happiness: The central pillar. Without it, no lasting happiness is possible.

Happiness has several pillars; and the central pillar is the pillar of power/self-control. All it takes is a single moment to realize that stuff outside doesn't have power over you. You are the owner of your thoughts, emotions and feelings. You can direct them as you want.

If you integrate and practice this one single thing, you will be be able to properly work on the other stuff. Changing your beliefs and definitions will be much easier, and you'll progress much faster.


Integrate beliefs like:

• I am powerful.
• I can direct my thoughts, emotions and feelings.
• I own myself

Realistically, it may take one year before you are consistently feeling good about 95% of the time, so there's no need to be hard on yourself. Everyone is at where they're at. It isn't as quick as some of the people who sell books and DVD's say it is.

[Fred Tracy]

Originally Posted by bmlyeryk

b/c they dont say it in a friendly way! they say it in a patronizing tone b/c they know i am unsociable! and that wasnt the only thing people said to me, there were worse things.

great help im getting here

I think you need some meditation. It looks like you have a whole crap load of absurd lines of thinking and conditioning built up in your mind. If you release it, you'll begin seeing things more clearly.

[Whitelotus]

Try specific tools for shifting your emotional state rather than going for broader ones like feeling good all the time, thinking positive and release negativity from your life although these tools are actually geared towards achieving that state.

EFT-Easy to learn, works excellent on temporary basis(atleast for me) If your feeling like crap, tap for 5 mins you would feel much better. You dont have to force yourself to feel gool.It just feels good.

Sedona: This may not be the "quick" fix you are looking for but can help you release resentment, fear and anger.

Lefkoe method: Belief buster. Please try the "I'm not good enough" belief removal process. Works fairly well in 15 minutes.

Hypnosis : There are lot of free confidence building hypnosis available online. if you can get your hands on Mike Mandel's peak performance it'd be great.

if you manage to take a little more time away from whining- try quantum light breath.here is a free link:
Eyes Wide Open: Quantum Light Breath


These are things that have worked for me in worse times.

Just a little piece of advice(oh well i have a strong hunch you wouldnt give two hoots but I feel compelled to anyway) Develop a little EMPATHY- towards yourself and others for gods sake. I've read some previous posts of yours and in every one of them you bitterly beat yourself up and when people try to reassure you ignore them completely let alone being grateful for having ppl who care about you.
You are a living,breathing, thinking human being.Isn't that amazing? Can you see, hear, touch, smell, feel? Incredible!! Just the idea that you exist and that you can wonder about your very existence makes you important. Please dont fret away your life when in truth you are just AMAZING!!!I swear.

[bmlyeryk]

well i will try again i guess...i made too big a deal.
main problem is to let go of feeling punished to cursed. i didnt know about LOA back then so i didnt know what to do of my circumstances. i thought it was punishment and i still feel like that. i cant think of a method to make it stop
but i will try what you listed above, ty for the advice everyone

[Balbrae]

The power of positive thinking is only BS to those who think it so. I, for one, find that the power of positive thinking is the most powerful force that mankind can harness because it is the highest form of self-love. To love oneself so fully that one continues to see the divinity in oneself, despite all "outward manifestations" to the contrary. Seth once quipped, if he had but one gift to give humanity it would be to give people the perspective of them that Seth had--that humans are so beautiful, but have no clue as to their greatness.

[MagicalRealist]

Originally Posted by Whitelotus

Just a little piece of advice(oh well i have a strong hunch you wouldnt give two hoots but I feel compelled to anyway) Develop a little EMPATHY- towards yourself and others for gods sake. I've read some previous posts of yours and in every one of them you bitterly beat yourself up and when people try to reassure you ignore them completely let alone being grateful for having ppl who care about you.

I second this. I can tell you're in a lot of pain, bmlyeryk, and probably have been for most of your life. It's become your entire mode of being, and you automatically relate to the world from that. But if you can take even "baby steps" toward changing your outlook on yourself and the world, things will start to get easier.

And you are capable of taking steps to change. I know this for a fact because you're here, admitting you have a problem, and seeking a way to help yourself. That's a huge step--and so many people never take it, or worse, stay mired in hopelessness and never recognize that change is possible at all.

So if you can find a way to take even a little pride, hope, and happiness in the fact that you are self-aware enough to get here and try to think differently, please, by all means do. You're entitled to that.

As for some practical "baby steps" that might help you shift your thinking, the one that got me started was looking for things in my life that I could be grateful for. I didn't want to be grateful, because I felt that I'd had to fight for everything I had, so I had to phrase it as "things that are good" for awhile until I hit a point where "grateful" didn't irritate me anymore.

And it can be the most boring, mundane things. In fact, it's almost better if they are boring and mundane, because there's no emotional baggage tied to them. For me, it was a coffee pot. Twenty years ago, I came home from work one evening, made a pot of coffee, and when I sat down to drink it realized that I really liked being able to come home, make a pot of my notorious super-strong coffee, and drink it in peace, without having to share it or listen to anybody gripe about its resemblance to used motor oil. It was as if a light had gone on: "Aha! This doesn't suck! Awesome!" And I found myself really getting into that feeling of being happy about that.

When you do that, you'll start thinking of other things to be happy about. It's like a magnet. From being happy about the coffee pot, and enjoying peace and quiet while I drank my coffee, I realized that I was happy to live by myself, without roommates. Yes, my apartment was tiny and in a bad neighborhood, and I couldn't afford to move, but it was all mine. I didn't have roommate drama. I could buy whatever food I wanted, put it in the fridge, and nobody was going to eat it. I could come home, shut the door, and not have to talk to anybody or deal with their stuff until I went to work the next day.

I remember that experience vividly to this day because it was a profound "waking up" moment for me. I'd been so caught up in negativity, focused on how wrong everything was, how much my life sucked, how I didn't have certain things--and that epiphany over the coffee pot changed everything. I started to notice other mundane, simple things I could enjoy and feel good about: the sky at sunset, being able to buy and enjoy my favorite burrito, the color of autumn leaves on my street, a favorite song, the landlord letting me get a cat, the clerk at the corner market who always had a new joke to tell. It was small stuff. Sometimes dumb stuff. But it didn't matter--little by little, I started to see more and more things that were good in my life, more things that worked, and gradually my life got better.

That whole process took years because I wasn't doing it consciously. I had the awakening, but no guidance or intention behind it. I didn't have a clue what I was doing, or why. If I had known what I was doing, my life would have been transformed at a much faster pace. But that doesn't really matter, now; what does matter is that I can tell you, right here, right now, that this works if you allow it to.

So pay attention to the things that are working in your life, the things that are good, the things that give you pleasure. When you encounter people who are polite to you, or show concern, or treat you well, notice that--and let yourself linger with that for a while. Replay it in your mind, and enjoy it. Look for more examples of it--make it a game, like a treasure hunt--believe me, you'll find them.

[hamix]

OP, you misunderstand what feel good means.

EVERYBODY has negative emotions. It's part of being human. The trick is to manage and overcome them and not let them dominate.

[JSB]

I think you would benefit by some effective energy healing work to get at those negative patterns and clear blocks from your system.

Are you comfortable mentioning where you live (general area)? There may be someone in your area who is good at this.

Originally Posted by bmlyeryk

well i will try again i guess...i made too big a deal.
main problem is to let go of feeling punished to cursed. i didnt know about LOA back then so i didnt know what to do of my circumstances. i thought it was punishment and i still feel like that. i cant think of a method to make it stop
but i will try what you listed above, ty for the advice everyone

[hamix]

Originally Posted by bmlyeryk

sorry my language and sorry if im complaining. i might have overreacted in this situation but im pretty sensitive

ive discovered a trend over the past few years that everythime i actually feel good or happy for once (which is rare) it gets negated with something bad and then im depressed and bitter again

and today happened to be a day where i was starting to feel good (i was not pretending or forcing it) and once again, i shouldve known i get another sarcastic "hi.. hi.. hi.. hi" from a stranger. i dont know who these goddam people are but they all seem to know who i am and start mistreating/being rude to me b/c im an outcast quiet nobody. ignoring them doesnt work, neither does cursing back or responding at all. im completely defenselss in this sitation and i have no friends to fall back on, its like me against the rest of the world everytime im happy! im starting to realize its unsafe for me to feel good anymore, b/c more if this might happen. it has been worse in grade school but i thought it shouldve ended long ago. i have no contact with those people from school anymore but still STRANGERS (my age group or younger) will start being rude once in a while.
i know its stupid to get depressed over a [fake] "hi" but i take things perosnally and its a personal attack on my part. i know thats one thing that reinforces the fact that i "dont deserve" what i want b/c ill get attacked for being happy OMG


today i was going to start "scripting" what i want to happen, but i canceleld that b/c im bitter now and afraid it wont work. ill never get to like myself or make any friends ever when evryone already knows how quiet and 'different' i am. having only enemies and nasty skin diseases doesnt help my thinknig i deserve what i want

i dont want to be a lone nobody b/c my future aspirations needs me to be with people but how is that supposed to even work. outside evidence is always the opposite. and i dont know any 'belief technique" that will work, doesnt sound wise to convince myself im lucky if these attacks can happen again
my dreams seem impossible, feels like im destined to be alone

FEELING GOOD = nonsense! it might work on other people but it sure does not create miracles for me. is the only option to stay depressed and hope that creates a miracle?

i am sorry i got depressed and made another useless post. i want to make LOA work for me but it keeps backfiring esp when i "feel good" (i dont fake it). it just doesnt look like what i want to happen ever will


is there anything i can do without having to worry about getting "punished" for being happy?! at least to never again get assaulted like this!

You lack coping skills. Why should one negative experience throw you back so much? Being positive is learning how to handle negativity and move beyond it.

As an example, if these people are bad to you (well nobody has to be nice) then shrug it off and ignore it. They don't owe you anything, but you don't owe them anything either.

[hamix]

OP, negative experiences are part of life. It is how we deal with them that is key.

You are using LOA, and it's good that you're trying to better yourself. But by feeling negative, or "blaming" the universe for making you feel bad is irrational. The trick is to feel good despite negativity.

[Sina172]

Originally Posted by hamix

OP, negative experiences are part of life. It is how we deal with them that is key.

You are using LOA, and it's good that you're trying to better yourself. But by feeling negative, or "blaming" the universe for making you feel bad is irrational. The trick is to feel good despite negativity.

Look who's talking, Hamix! The guy who wants someone else to be on crutches for 3 months for something YOU attracted from the start!

Who the hell are YOU to give advice when you want to wish something FAR WORSE than a chronic negative emotion on someone else?!

Sina

[waizen]

Whether we're talking IM or just plain psychology, what is happening here is a case of your self-image creating a self-fulfilling prophesy. You are getting exactly what you are feeling. We all go through that.

When I was a teenager (I'm 52 these days) I had a really terrible self-image. Not important why but I did. That resulted in a lot of wasted early lifetime being lonely. I read all sorts of self-help books and such and that was also the time I first discovered IM.

At a certain point, I graduated high school and was college bound. Don't know if it was due to all the books or to the LoA, but eventually the thought occurred to me that I was about to go to a new school...where no one knew me. In my mind, it was a clean slate! So, I decided to become a new person. Just like that.

And so I did. I walked around, 'pretending' to be a walking montage of many people I admired. Eventually, I really became that person. Again, don't know if it was LoA or just plain self-hypnosis, but it worked. I've had my ups and downs through the years but for the most part, I really like who I am.

Am I physically attractive? Who knows. You can judge for yourself from the picture at left. No doubt the picture you see is different from the picture I see. And probably different than what everyone else sees. Everyone's mental filter is different. Interestingly, the image I see in the mirror is a lot better looking than any picture of myself I usually see...go figure.

I also remember, again, back in my early college days, there was a girl in one of my classes. Was she physically attractive? Well, if you were to see a passport photo of her (utilitarian picture...not posed), you would probably not think she was very physically attractive. But you know what? I bet every guy in that class had the hots for her...yes, me too.

Why was that? There was something else about her. She oozed something that was not easy to identify. Maybe a confidence, maybe a spiritual thing, who knows. She became beautiful for reasons other than her physical body.

The real you, the higher self, is the most beautiful thing around. Everyone's higher self is. But, it's up to you to live from that higher self. You don't have to wish for that beautiful higher self; it's here, right now. You are that being, right at this moment. Pretty cool, no?

Like me, make that decision to become someone you want to be. It is as simple as a secret little game of pretend. Just go about your day privately role playing that new self-image. It really is that simple. When you start to believe the game in your head, it will become natural. When that happens, incredible things will happen. Happiness will start to feel natural to you (it isn't feeling natural to you right now...part of the problem). That will help some more. People will start acting different around you and you will attract a whole new crowd. As you successfully attain happy milestones, each one combines to drive better and better situations to you, faster and faster. And, beauty will ooze out of you, too.

I can promise you...your life will change. It really will.

[hamix]

Originally Posted by Sina172

Look who's talking, Hamix! The guy who wants someone else to be on crutches for 3 months for something YOU attracted from the start!

Who the hell are YOU to give advice when you want to wish something FAR WORSE than a chronic negative emotion on someone else?!

Sina

I don't get your point. He is complaining about how he gets shot down when he feels happy, and evidently doesn't understand the application of positive thinking

[bmlyeryk]

^
i'm a girl

[Beingist]

Just gonna throw this out there....

BS doesn't "bite you in the a**", it rather slaps you in the face.