only thinking but not acting

[jaideepv1234]

I want to ask you one thing. My biggest problem is that "I found myself always unable to implement any idea".

For Example, In previous thread I said that I am unhappy with my looks that simply means I need to take steps towards reducing my weight. That means I need to join the Gym. I know once my weight will be reduced I will feel good about me and I will start loving myself.

Now the problem is I know WHAT IS MY PROBLEM and I also know WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE IN ORDER TO REMOVE THAT PROBLEM. But I did not do that. I think I simply talks and doing nothing in reality.

I always says that I want to do this and that things but in practicality I does nothing. I only wish but not take the actual necessary steps.

What does this called? Please Farouk help me out of this situation

[newkaren]

Originally Posted by jaideepv1234

For Example, In previous thread I said that I am unhappy with my looks that simply means I need to take steps towards reducing my weight. That means I need to join the Gym. I know once my weight will be reduced I will feel good about me and I will start loving myself.

You need to start loving yourself as is. Be happy today ... Look at all the blessings you have in your life right now. Taking care of yourself is an act of self love.

Im sure you are an awesome person, Think about the good in you. Be happy today, be greatful for all the awesomeness you have in your life today. The roof over your head, the food on your plate, etc. Thats not to say you cant change a few things, only look at the glass as half full.

Dont save happieness and self love for the skinny you.

[Zenn]

Originally Posted by jaideepv1234

For Example, In previous thread I said that I am unhappy with my looks that simply means I need to take steps towards reducing my weight. That means I need to join the Gym. I know once my weight will be reduced I will feel good about me and I will start loving myself.

I think you make and build on false premises. Joining the Gym may not reduce your weight and a reduced wieght may not make you feel good about yourself or start loving yourself.

By classic LOA, the cause and effect is the opposite of what most people think. Often you need to reverse the sequence. You need to feel and be who you want to be first before you can have and do what you want. Not the other way around.

When an action requires will power, or if it feels like a sacrifice or forced labor, it's difficult to start and to maintain. When you are aligned with your goals, falicitating situations and inspired actions come naturally to you.

There is no prerequisite to being happy.

There is no prerequisite to love yourself.

[truant]

jaideepv, here is some practical advice to complement the spiritual advice:

You probably have a belief that change is difficult. Change is not difficult, it is very very easy...as long as you only try to change a little at a time. If you try to make sweeping changes you will encounter all kinds of resistance and find yourself without the motivation to act.

The easiest way to change is to make a small change and then, over time, make it bigger. If you want to exercise more, start by taking a five minute walk every day. If you miss a day, don't beat yourself up, just take a walk the next day. After doing this for a few days, walk a little farther. If taking a fifteen minute walk every day is too inconvenient, break it up into a half hour walk every other day. The point when you're starting out is not to lose weight, it's to create a habit that can be built on.

Once you've been walking every day for a few days or weeks, maybe try doing some other exercises, like a push up every day, or a couple of sit-ups. Just make a very, very small change. A change that is so small you barely even notice it. Over time, these actions will become habits and you will just do them. Every once in a while, increase the amount of effort you are expending just a little and try to build that into your routine. Maybe add a fifteen minute bike-ride every week. Gradually, little by little, you will start to feel better about yourself and start seeing yourself as an active and healthy person. When your self-image begins to change, you will find it much easier to make the changes you want.

This technique can be applied anywhere in life and, as long as you actually want what you think you want, it will be effective. You can apply it to your diet by substituting one healthy meal every week for an unhealthy one. Dieting is hard because people run into the wall of ingrained habits and self-image. You have to change yourself slowly, the way a turtle walks. Don't try to completely change your diet all at once, just change it little by little. Give yourself time to adjust to finding new foods, finding recipes that you like, enjoying the new foods that you're eating. If you try to cut out everything you are used to and like, you will resent the diet instead of appreciating it. After eating a healthy meal once a week for a couple of months, increase it to two healthy meals. The goal is to create a permanent change in your habits so that dieting isn't a challenge, but a gradual reorientation of your thoughts and actions.

The only way to prove to yourself that this works is to try it. It is the easiest thing you will ever do.

[Reefs]

Originally Posted by truant

You probably have a belief that change is difficult.

To me it seems that jai is just bored. His goals are only of a hypothetical nature, there's no real focus, no momentum behind that idea, so it doesn't lead to any action.

[MagicalRealist]

You're experiencing all this resistance because you don't really want to join a gym.

Oh, sure--you believe you need to. But that doesn't change the fact that it's drudgery. A chore. One of those grim, no-fun, joyless things you'll have to force yourself to do because you believe you should.

On top of that, you're beating yourself up by deciding that you aren't worthy of love and acceptance until you've changed your physical body. It's not good enough, it's ugly, it's a problem in need of fixing--and the way to fix it is by punishing it.

Small wonder it's so hard to find motivation!

And deep-down you know all this, so you avoid it. Deep-down, you want to enjoy yourself, to have fun, to do things that are pleasurable. Deep-down, you wish you could be comfortable in your current body (while maybe at the same time doing enjoyable things that will help you lose weight and improve your physical condition).

I know once my weight will be reduced I will feel good about me and I will start loving myself.

This is a trap, and I believe this is what you have to change first--not your body, but your thinking about your body, and the way you feel about it (and, by extension, yourself).

If you can start feeling good about your body right now, as it is, and start loving and accepting yourself right now, the weight issue will eventually resolve itself. Maybe you will find a form of exercise you truly enjoy. Maybe you will be led to discover which foods are right for you. Maybe you won't overeat, or eat junk, out of a sense of dissatisfaction, futility, and frustration because you're happier with yourself and your body as you are.

Your body has its good qualities; focus on them. Be glad for everything that is right about it, and everything that is beautiful--those things do exist. When you catch yourself thinking unkind thoughts toward your body (and thus yourself), stop. Then replace those negative thoughts with something better.

It takes time and patience, because these kinds of harsh, punitive attitudes toward the body are so ingrained, and the messages in advertising, TV, and magazines don't help. But if you can start to feel even a little bit better about your body, and stop treating it as something that must be punished into acceptable form, things will start to change.