To Bring Forth a Dream

[lycan]

I have neglected the "obsessing over manifestation/dreaming stuff" because I figured I already knew enough and it would just bore me and that it would be better for me to focus on chilling. That may have been a mistake so I'm going back to the books.

[lycan]

I have found that hesitation usually precedes a descent into anxiety and then depression. [another way of saying this is "when you focus on fear, it grows"]

The other big thing is making choices that contradict with my desires out of the feeling/thought that "it won't be enough anyway". [another way of saying this is "when you focus on powerlesness, it grows"]

An example of those things in relation to the dream of being a fashion model would be avoiding modeling agencies because my height only allows certain types of work, or drinking/eating things I believe are bad for my skin because I don't know how to grow taller (that is, it's not enough to take care of my skin).

[sk8joyful]

Originally Posted by ChildOfNone

Depression lulls you into sleep but sleep will not resolve the depression.

Four Steps

I was stuck in a very young developmental stage
in need of the mirroring and caring and empathizing.

Ultimately, I had to find it for myself and then at long last I am able to move on
to the stage where I am now: identifying, organizing and releasing the obstacles.

Each stage is important. I could not do this until I had done that.

Good luck to you Lican.

At that page it says:
QUICK SUMMARY OF THE FOUR STEPS
OF COGNITIVE BIOBEHAVIORAL SELF-TREATMENT FOR OCD

Step 1: RELABEL
Recognize that the intrusive obsessive thoughts and urges are the RESULT OF OCD.
Step 2: REATTRIBUTE
Realize that intensity and intrusiveness of the thought or urge is
CAUSED BY OCD; it is probably related to a biochemical imbalance in the brain.
Step 3: REFOCUS
Work around the OCD thoughts by focusing your attention on something else,
at least for a few minutes: DO ANOTHER BEHAVIOR.
Step 4: REVALUE
Do not take the OCD thought at face value. It Is not significant in itself.
-----------------------
It also shows where, supposedly, the "imbalance" trouble is in the brain:
Funny thing,
that's right where most people hold the receiver of their CELL-phone.
But no, Cell phones can't possibly be harmful?

[lycan]

Originally Posted by ChildOfNone

Depression lulls you into sleep but sleep will not resolve the depression.

I didn't mean go to bed and stay there. I have found that short naps between 20 minutes and 2 hours are much better. Sometimes the more you sleep the more tired you get.

[ChildOfNone]

Lycan - on depression and sleep I must say that I am speaking from what I know I should do rather than what I usually do. But then that is exactly what I am moving toward - a life where I fundtion and operate in the way that gives life rather than takes it (an activated and functioning will - I can't wait!)

[Derelle]

That is a good idea, I think you should use some type of brainwave technology along with your affirmations because the sound wave from the brainwave technology, will allow it to be played directly to your subconcious mind. The reason why affirmations don't work is because the mind has been so conditioned to think one way, the affirmation then holds no weight to the mind. Therefore, you have to sneek the messages by the mind and have the affirmation be played over and over, directly at the source of your manisfestation, your sub-conscious mind. You might be able to find some soultions below in my sig. Hope it works out. Let us know the results when you are through.

[sk8joyful]

Originally Posted by Derelle

The reason why affirmations don't work is because the mind has been so conditioned to think one way, the affirmation then holds no weight to the mind.
Therefore, you have to sneek the messages by the mind and have the affirmation be played over and over, directly at the source of your manisfestation, your sub-conscious mind.

This is true, which I keep posting over, & over that with Hypnosis
you get 'by-pass' of the conscious mind's Critical factor. - So the suggestions are accepted, & Voila! the person gets the change they want. Neato!
.

[sk8joyful]

Originally Posted by lycan

I want to change my life, drastically and quickly, and in ways that "the world" believes to be impossible. I can no longer bear living as I do and I'm not willing to settle for less. I'm not willing to accept the options that "the world" tells me I have. I have all my day free and nothing else that needs to be done.
This is to document what I am doing to accomplish this
and will not feature any sort of "complaining". If you have any specific advice to give, go ahead.

No one's posted in this thread for this entire past week?

No interest anymore?

[lycan]

Originally Posted by sk8joyful

No one's posted in this thread for this entire past week?

No interest anymore?

I do not wish to polute this thread with negativity and I have nothing positive to report.

How is your own healing going?

[Arboretor]

Here is an interesting thread on the Microstock Group Forum where stock photographers tell what kind of models they prefer and where they find them.

Perhaps it will help you to see that you don't have to look like a superstar in order to work as a model.

[lycan]

Originally Posted by Arboretor

Here is an interesting thread on the Microstock Group Forum where stock photographers tell what kind of models they prefer and where they find them.

Perhaps it will help you to see that you don't have to look like a superstar in order to work as a model.

From the link:

Many of Yuri's models are also his friends.. he hasn't used pro models exclusively. .. and on a side point, what is a pro model? Very very few people make a living as a model and if they do I could almost guarantee they wouldn't do RF stock work. They would have to much more careful about where and how their image is used, it is their livelihood. The models you are going to get for RF stock are models that generate their income from something else and do modeling as a hobby or for fun on the side.

The link didn't provide me with any encouragement at all. It is hard enough to succeed as a male model without being short, balding and with acne scars.

[truant]

Originally Posted by lycan

The link didn't provide me with any encouragement at all. It is hard enough to succeed as a male model without being short, balding and with acne scars.

Lycan, just from this small sample, here are the beliefs you seem to be maintaining:

• short men can't succeed as models
• balding men can't succeed as models
• men with acne scars can't succeed as models
• most men don't make a living modeling; therefore, I can't make a living modeling
• whether or not I succeed as a model depends on other people, not on my own effort and initiative
• in order to be a model, therefore, I must grow taller, regrow my hair, clear up my complexion, submit to the mercy of others, and even then it is ultimately out of my control

These are your actual beliefs in this area. I bet you can find an exception to each of the rules you have imposed on yourself in real life, short men, balding men, men with acne scars that have all had successful careers as models.

Manifestations do not understand the concept of scale: one manifestation is not intrinsically more difficult than another. It is just as easy to manifest a millions dollars as it is to manifest one dollar. In this case, it is as easy to make yourself the one exception to all of these rules as it is to achieve success in one area and fail in all the others. Scale is a purely personal invention created by our beliefs. If you think it will be more difficult to achieve two goals than one, then it will be.

The article did not give you encouragement because your present beliefs force you to focus on the negative implications instead of the positive implications. You are not paying attention to your thoughts. You're just using visualizations or affirmations or whatever you're using as a layer of paint over a crumbling foundation. You have to rebuild your thinking from the ground up.

[lycan]

Earlier in my life I thought of my "dream" as "being a musician". Until I realized I didn't care that I could be a successful musician without control over my body. The musician role was simply the clearest symbol of all the things I desired. Modeling is similar. It is not the activity of posing for the camera that primarily interests me. When I say being a model is my dream, that has a personal meaning to me. It is the clearest, most believable way I have to integrate all aspects of my "real" dream. It has no value in isolation, it is not a goal in itself. I do not need to be a "supermodel" in order to integrate everything, I do not even necessarily need to be a model, being a model is simply the easiest and most believable way I can see to do so. But being a model in ways that do not help me integrate the "real" dream is of no interest to me. What the thread linked makes clear to me is the futility of seeking work as a stock photography model within this context.

[lycan]

Originally Posted by truant

You are not paying attention to your thoughts. You're just using visualizations or affirmations or whatever you're using as a layer of paint over a crumbling foundation. You have to rebuild your thinking from the ground up.

I am paying as much attention to my thoughts as I know how. I cannot do visualizations or affirmations unless I can find a logic within my thoughts that validates them. The images simply do not flow. However, just as I create doubt in my inability to change, I eventually create doubt in my ability to change and swing back.

But for example, what thoughts/beliefs prevent me from being taller? I have pondered this. I never thought of myself as being short, even in my early 20s, until... I realized I was. I have ignored my height most of my life. So clearly unless there is a change in something, the height is going to remain the same. The question is, a change in what? My self-image has never been of a short person. I feel strange when I am around taller men, I find it surreal that normal men would be significantly taller than me. I look at a full lenght mirror or photograph and I wonder who that person is. There are many things I like about the reflection and that I recognize as me, but shortness is not one of them and neither is baldness or acne. One might argue (and I have thought of this) that because of my early experiences, I do not feel "grown up". That is a plausible theory, but I'm not sure what to do with it.

[truant]

Originally Posted by lycan

I am paying as much attention to my thoughts as I know how. I cannot do visualizations or affirmations unless I can find a logic within my thoughts that validates them...

And that's a big part of your problem. You don't need logic at all to manifest your intention. All you need to do is intend it. The intention itself is the motivating and actualizing force of the manifestation. Read Castaneda. He was great at explaining the mysteries of intent. Your logic, because it is flawed by your current, limiting beliefs, is what leads you astray. There is nothing inherently wrong with logic, but it is only as good as the data it uses; and your data is incomplete. You don't have to know how something will come about for it to happen, you just have to either (a) have faith that it will, or (b) understand that you get what you concentrate on. If you concentrate on the impossibility of a short bald man becoming a successful male model, that's what you get. If you concentrate on being in the limelight, the center of attention, admired and desired by all, that's what you get. There is no logic to it, that's why intent is a mystery. At this point, you still don't understand how intent works, so everything I say just frustrates you. Look at your experience right now, in this moment. That is the only moment that exists. Intend better for yourself.

Most people do not form their physical image consciously, so it tends to be somewhat different from the way they picture themselves. You have to understand that it manifests your real feelings and beliefs about yourself. You don't have to worry about being small to end up being small, you just have to have a belief that limits you in some way that being small satisfies. Injury and illness is a close analogy here: people don't intend specific illnesses and injuries (usually); they intend limitations which result in injuries and illnesses that satisfy the limitation. A lot of the events in our life seem random, but that is a superficial perspective. We quite consciously use 'whatever is at hand' to get what we believe we deserve. (Note, I did not say what we want.)

P.S. The "I do not feel 'grown up'" insight is valuable. I recommend you pursue it.

[sk8joyful]

Originally Posted by lycan

I do not wish to polute this thread with negativity and
I have nothing positive to report.

How is your own healing going?

Thank you for asking.

Because I have some insights, that you don't accept, I know my challenges have met their Match, and I will win; or
shall I say I have already won so as far as I am concerned, it's not "if", but
how soon... is my Outcome the demonstrated reality.

I wish the same for you, in whatever realistic goals you set for yourself too.

[lycan]

Originally Posted by sk8joyful

I wish the same for you, in whatever realistic goals you set for yourself too.

Interesting that you speak of realistic after talking about how I cannot grow taller. Bone growth after the fusing of the growth plates is no less realistic than healing a severely damaged heart, lung, restoring hair lost through male pattern baldness, fading away a mature scar or correcting eyesight from myopia, or quite a few other things.

[sk8joyful]

Originally Posted by lycan

Interesting that you speak of realistic after talking about how I cannot grow taller.
Bone growth after the fusing of the growth plates is no less realistic

Fine, if you know how to do it already, then
quit whining about being stuck in, & sinking deeper
into a hole. Nobody is interested in furthering a whiner, except shrinks, & too many other medical docs.

Steve's site is all about "personal-Development for SMART people".
Folks who find ways of making their dreams come true.
So let's see just how smart you truly are, of moving towards your own goals.

Originally Posted by lycan

than healing a severely damaged heart, lung,
restoring hair lost through male pattern baldness, fading away a mature scar or correcting eyesight from myopia, or quite a few other things.

Except for one slight difference: you can easily THRIVE being 'short, bald, facially scarred & myopia',
so long as your heart & lungs are ably moving you forward...

What in your response here, was there POSITIVE KINDness, &
GENTLEness towards growing a NEW-stronger heart, and lung. - your wisdom? Please point it out. Thanks!

Also, please before you post to other people, make sure
you have something POSITIVE & CONSTRUCTIVE
that you personally know works successfully to add. Thanks again!
.

[lycan]

Originally Posted by sk8joyful

Except for one slight difference: you can easily THRIVE being 'short, bald, facially scarred & myopia', so long as your heart & lungs are ably moving you forward...

No, I cannot.

[truant]

Originally Posted by lycan

No, I cannot.

For the record, that is also a belief.

Not one I'd keep, personally, but to each their own.

[truant]

Your beliefs and your experience of the world are not two separate things. Your beliefs are always experienced directly as material facts. A 'fact' is an objective apprehension of the material side of your belief. A 'belief' is your subjective formulation of a rule about the nature of your existence, which is just another name for a fact. Your belief in gravity, for example, is also a 'fact': if you jump off a bridge, you're going to get wet. You believe in gravity, and the consequences of that belief are invariable. If you believe that you are undeserving of love, then that belief will be faithfully represented in the 'facts' of your experience: no one will express feelings of affection toward you, or, if they do, you will automatically censor them out, depending on the strength of your belief.

This is what makes the LOA so tricky: there is no way to prove that it works or doesn't work because the evidence available to you will always mirror your beliefs. A hardened skeptic will never find evidence supporting it in line with his beliefs; a mystic can point out the window and show you 'evidence' in his own experience. This is why you have to do the work yourself to change your beliefs. The fact that you are here, persistently asking these questions indicates that you are ready and willing to believe in the LOA. It doesn't necessarily mean that you DO believe in it, however. There is a subtle but important difference.

Think of your current existence as a dream. Every single element in your experience was brought to you by your beliefs. The chair that you're sitting on is a product of your beliefs. The building that you occupy you occupy because of your beliefs. The body that you inhabit you fashioned from your beliefs. That doesn't mean that these things aren't real; quite the opposite: they are real because you believe in them. Your beliefs are the facts of your experience. If you want to know what you believe, therefore, simply examine your present experience.

In order to make any kind of change in your life, then, you have to change your beliefs. There is simply no other way to do it. The good news is that changing your beliefs can be as easy and changing what you happen to be thinking about; in practice, however, for most people, a lot more work is involved. What you need are facilitating beliefs: beliefs that make it easier for you to change your beliefs.

Let me give you an example: there is no past or future. Everything that is, has, or ever will happen is happening right now. There is no past experience imposing itself on your present; there is no future eventuality that you need to be afraid of. In other words: no experience in your past is preventing you from changing your experience now in the present. You are not the way you are now because of what happened to you in your childhood, or because of something your parents did, or because of where you were born, or owing to some 'karmic' influence from a past life. Similarly, there is no fate or destiny interfering with your personal plans, no higher power dictating the particular experiences you will have, no inevitable end to the world or humanity. Everything exists now, in the present moment. Anything you don't like can be changed. As Seth was fond of saying: "The Point of Power is in the Present". Quite simply: there is nothing but the present. Your present experience, therefore, is a perfect replica of your current, true beliefs. If something in your experience is troubling you, you do not need to dig into your past or anticipate some future occurence to correct it. These temporal states have no reality except for the reality that you attribute to them. You can change anything, at any time, including your past. (Of course, you will never be able to prove this to yourself because you will always 'remember' whatever you believe about your past to be the past. Another one of those interesting conundrums.)

What you need to do, therefore, in concrete terms, is to stop living in the past or the future. You need to be focused now, on your real, present beliefs. You have at your disposal infinite potential; but that potential is very strictly determined by the rules that you assign to yourself. That's why I keep telling you to 'loosen up'. You're like a broken record, repeating the same limitations over and over to yourself like a mantra, maintaining your present, undesireable experience. The only way you are going to break that cycle is to take action now, in the present, and change your beliefs.

So how do you change your beliefs? Well, as I mentioned at the start of this post, it's really quite simple: think about something else. You get what you concentrate on. You don't have to abide by logic or natural laws, those will simply impair you; simply intend your objective through visualization. This is where faith comes into play: you just have to take the LOA (or the Will of God, if you prefer) on faith. People who are experienced in using the LOA understand this: when you know how it works, you don't need faith because you understand it in principle; when you are just starting out, though, faith is essential.

As other people have mentioned in related posts, an attitude of gratitude can be useful as well. Gratitude is our natural state; there is nothing unusual about it. When everything is perfect just as it is, it is impossible to be anything but grateful. Adopting an attitude of gratitude, therefore, helps you to remember your natural state.

Now, to take a specific example, how shall you apply this in your present circumstances? You want to be a successful male model. The thing to do is to imagine as vividly as possible that you already have your desired state. (This has already been said many times.) The trick is to pay attention to your thoughts as you go about the day so that you can catch negative, self-doubting thoughts from taking root and sabotaging your intentions. In your case, since your objective is very specific and the contrast between what you perceive as your present experience and the experience you desire is so great, you will naturally run into a lot of doubt and resistance. This is why I suggested that you examine your beliefs very carefully so that you can identify conflicting beliefs and change them. (This is also why it is so important that you understand what you truly want--your Path with Heart--because having competing goals will create competing results and lead to conflict.)

Let's take another example. Say you want to correct your vision. Imagine as vividly as possible what you would be like with perfect vision. See yourself going about your day without wearing glasses or contacts and performing everything with perfect clarity and vision. Do this for several minutes and then let it go. During the course of the day, you will likely feel impulses to do things to achieve this end. Perhaps you will research eye exercises or look into corrective surgery. The means to the end is immaterial. It's the end result that you're after. The particular form that your healing takes will simply be a by-product of your beliefs and character. Now, if you are like most people with poor vision, you will invariably note your poor vision to yourself numerous times throughout the day, sustaining your present condition. Remember: the point of power is in the present, so these observations set up new impulses leading you to engage in activities which lead to more poor vision. When you note these observations, you should reject them and replace them with your positive affirmations. Be aware of your response, however; if you note that your rejections are very intense, and your affirmations very strained, you still do not believe in your own power to effect change and you should return to the facilitating beliefs that I mentioned earlier. These will help you to reattain your composure and start creating again from a position of confidence.

The key that you need to remember is that your experience is a direct manifestation of your thoughts. To change your experience, change what you think about. To facilitate that change, you need to change your understanding about the nature of your experience; you need to see how your thoughts are dictating your experience. Also: remember that the evidence you have supporting (or discrediting) your ability to effect the change you desire is also a product of your belief. If you look around for reasons why you can't change, you will find them, and you won't change. It's as simple as that.

[lycan]

That is pretty clear truant. Thank you.