how to go about manifesting a boyfriend?

[lailamariee]

how exactly do you manifest a boyfriend? do you make the list of everything that would make him perfect, and say "I am happily going out with my ideal boyfriend" or something like that? and then visualize it and let it go? i'm just confused on how to go about this, help pleaseee?

[AngelPsychic444]

Get this CD it really works!

Amazon.com: Romance Angels (9781401904142): Doreen Virtue: Books

[MisterPibb]

Making a list sounds like a great idea. Writing down what you would want your boyfriend to be like specifically is consciously affirming your intentions. However, deep past the conscious mind, a.k.a the subconscious, do you really believe that you will attract the man of your dreams? Do have any limiting beliefs that might hinder that intention? Your subconscious mind controls everything-make sure that and your conscious desires are aligned so that you can manifest with precision.

[missbhaven]

In the past I made a list of pros and cons about my previous boyfriends.
When I was done with the cons I looked up antonyms and then added them to my pros list.
Then I really examined my list until I felt confident about it. I thought about experiences that have happened that I felt good about which made me choose that word and imagined myself having that feeling again (not the exact person per se but rather the feeling I felt when realizing they are being this way). In my mind I guess I logic-ed it out to be acceptable and reasonable based on my previous experience.
I also prioritized my list into essentials and desirable perks.
I started this list because I was tired of the luck of the draw I wanted to be more decisive when entering the market again. I knew if I had a better list of attributes I was looking for I would be able to whittle out the more undesirable ones easier.
Then I just left it. I found it a couple of years later and found that my boyfriends were in fact along those lines. Looking back I realized the ease of which I basically assessed people noting similairities to attributes or actions of my exes.

When I did this I didn't know most of the LOA techniques but I realized I did many of them in this exercise which I was using simply to define my search parameters. My list could be used as a positive affirmation since I searched of positive words to replace my cons. I linked a future event by linking it to a previous event. I kept going over my list until I felt comfortable that essentially I was worthy and that this list was achievable. Also I wasn't looking for a particular person but rather to experience feelings or a relationship. And last I forgot about it and trusted my myself that I would be able to remember thus noticing those that fit the bill.

[pyrogen]

Okay, just a few tips...

I don't feel it's necessarily the best idea to create from the past. Like in the movie "Inception" - don't remember, imagine. That's a more powerful place.

I've done a lot of love LOA. Boyfriends, encounters, a husband, what have you. It's not so much about pushing your energy out into the universe as much as stating your intention and opening up inside. Now I'm LOAing for a woman partner

There are a couple of books on the topic which I feel are by and far better than anything else out there on the topic.

They are... "Finding Each Other" by Mary and Don Kelly (a Huna based approach) and "Love Will Find You" by Kathryn Alice. They're good companion pieces and do complementary work. I've heard that "Calling In The One" by Kathryn Woodward Thomas is good, too. It's all about clearing away the "gunk" inside.

I also wrote a blog entry about the very topic.

The Skeptical Mystic: Common Love LOA Mistakes

One mistake people make is "objectifying" their partner in their mind and manifesting a *person*, not a *relationship*.

There's better levels than manifesting a partner, I'm on a different track now, putting my intention out into the universe but then flying blind.

Oh, a trick:

When you do love LOA...

You must let go of EVERYONE YOU ARE STUCK ON. Exes, crushes, EVERYONE. Release them all.

Don't worry about it. If they're really the one you're supposed to be with, they'll show up like a bad penny, but chances are, they're not. It's best to treat it that way.

And crushes are good for helping to be "signposts". They help you clarify what you want.

Still, it's best to release them when you do this work, and start from a clean slate.

[AlmostGodess]

Originally Posted by pyrogen

You must let go of EVERYONE YOU ARE STUCK ON. Exes, crushes, EVERYONE. Release them all.

Don't worry about it. If they're really the one you're supposed to be with, they'll show up like a bad penny, but chances are, they're not. It's best to treat it that way.

And crushes are good for helping to be "signposts". They help you clarify what you want.

Still, it's best to release them when you do this work, and start from a clean slate.

Loved this!

[pyrogen]

Thankoo, Goddess hey, you are one, no almost about it!

I had a crush... just recently.

Then I remembered some practices, turning poison into medicine...

Awoke this morning feeling, I don't need someone to love or to love me... love is not a scarce commodity. I can love anyone, any time.. plus honor where they are at. But love isn't something I need from just one person. Its everywhere.

And my crush isn't crushy anymore. She's awesome sauce, but so am I and so are you.

Now, someone to share the fun with.. that would kick ass. I'm shining a big ol beacon, so if any awesome person wants to meet for coffee and impromptu checkers and making fun of the world... let me know. I'll be your soulmate for that hour or two.

[spacecadetglow]

Originally Posted by pyrogen

Now, someone to share the fun with.. that would kick ass. I'm shining a big ol beacon, so if any awesome person wants to meet for coffee and impromptu checkers and making fun of the world... let me know. I'll be your soulmate for that hour or two.

I'll take you up on that.

Coffee and making fun of the world? Two of my favoritest things!

[pyrogen]

Originally Posted by spacecadetglow

I'll take you up on that.

Coffee and making fun of the world? Two of my favoritest things!

You're on, hot stuff. When and where?

[spacecadetglow]

Originally Posted by pyrogen

You're on, hot stuff. When and where?

I might come to Cali this summer?

[pyrogen]

Originally Posted by spacecadetglow

I might come to Cali this summer?

Awesome. Keep me appraised! We'll have a blast. What kind of food do you like? Lot of great choices in the Bay Area.

[spacecadetglow]

Originally Posted by pyrogen

Awesome. Keep me appraised! We'll have a blast. What kind of food do you like? Lot of great choices in the Bay Area.

I love ethnic food. Mexican, Chinese, Thai, Mediterranean, Italian... om nom nom. And I was veggie once so I'm down with all the hippie health foods, too.

It was just an idea I had when I saw that CR was having a party and we were all talking about meeting up. I have no idea how close you are to Angela/LMM/Solipsist though... I think they are more in Socal? It'd be super cool to fly out there and travel up the coast, though.

I should start saving for my last hurrah before grad school in the fall...

[pyrogen]

Way way awesome. I'd love to show you around. And I'm an omnivore, so it'll be your pick.

CR lives like a half hour away, but if everyone's gonna get naked at her party... I dunno.

[aabbcc]

Originally Posted by pyrogen

The Skeptical Mystic: Common Love LOA Mistakes

You must let go of EVERYONE YOU ARE STUCK ON. Exes, crushes, EVERYONE. Release them all.

Do you have any suggestions on how to do this? I don't think I am particularly stuck on my past, but I have never been very successful at manifesting a relationship, so I am trying to go a bit deeper, see if I can figure out why this is so.

[pyrogen]

Originally Posted by aabbcc

Do you have any suggestions on how to do this? I don't think I am particularly stuck on my past, but I have never been very successful at manifesting a relationship, so I am trying to go a bit deeper, see if I can figure out why this is so.

Plenty of processes out there that help. Kathryn Alice's stuff is great. So is turning poison into medicine. Love them, just love them, and honor where they are at... y'all did your best. When you are laughing with your love, you'll know that your ex helped make you the person you are now, who they love. It's possible to be better, not worse, for a break up.

[aabbcc]

Originally Posted by pyrogen

... you'll know that your ex helped make you the person you are now, who they love. It's possible to be better, not worse, for a break up.

Well, yeah. I already know that. And I know that I am a better person. I have learned from the experience and moved on. Honestly, I tend not to think about my exes or want them back. I am still friends with my old flames, but with me, when it's over, it's over. I don't hold grudges and I don't place blame. I simply move on. I find myself wondering, though, if there is something there that is holding me back, something that I should work on. I don't really know if there is or not.

Maybe I just like being alone too much, so that's what the Universe gives me.

[pyrogen]

Originally Posted by aabbcc

Well, yeah. I already know that. And I know that I am a better person. I have learned from the experience and moved on. Honestly, I tend not to think about my exes or want them back. I am still friends with my old flames, but with me, when it's over, it's over. I don't hold grudges and I don't place blame. I simply move on. I find myself wondering, though, if there is something there that is holding me back, something that I should work on. I don't really know if there is or not.

Maybe I just like being alone too much, so that's what the Universe gives me.

Good attitude to have.

Do you have any limiting beliefs about what you are trying to create?

I have got fierce ones; I often try to fight the belief that what I want, just doesn't exist. Lifetime of conditioning. Gay love LOA is probably a whole other topic worthy of consideration, because of the gremlin-fighting it involves.

[aabbcc]

Originally Posted by pyrogen

Do you have any limiting beliefs about what you are trying to create?

I was thinking about that last night. I know that I tend to get stuck in a rut - I am very happy with my daily routine. I don't like change. Of course, manifesting a relationship means change. No way around it. But that isn't necessarily a bad thing and a good relationship with someone would be a happy change. Also, it's not something that would happen overnight, a good relationship takes time, so I would have time to get used to it.

I am going to work on getting comfortable with that and see what happens.

[Henk]

Originally Posted by lailamariee

how exactly do you manifest a boyfriend? do you make the list of everything that would make him perfect, and say "I am happily going out with my ideal boyfriend" or something like that? and then visualize it and let it go? i'm just confused on how to go about this, help pleaseee?

Joe Vitale can help you out:
The Attractor Factor: 5 Easy Steps for Creating Wealth (or Anything Else) from the Inside Out.

This really works (worked for me), and he has really easy steps, not the new age humbug many others try to sell you.

In fact manifesting a boyfriend seems to me easy to do if you follow his system. My opinion is that in all problems related to the human mind the LOA is quite functional. I am not so convinced it works for material/physical problems.

[shannon smith]

Hey there,
You would do this the same way you would apply this to anything else. I have a recipe to follow that might help you, link below. But be sure to NOT dwell on things about a boyfriend that you do NOT want. Don't say, I want him not to smoke, I want him not to be unhealthy like my last boyfriend, etc. Visualize and picture only in the positive. This might help you: Global Information Network & the Law of Attraction

[JoRichards]

Originally Posted by aabbcc

Well, yeah. I already know that. And I know that I am a better person. I have learned from the experience and moved on. Honestly, I tend not to think about my exes or want them back. I am still friends with my old flames, but with me, when it's over, it's over. I don't hold grudges and I don't place blame. I simply move on. I find myself wondering, though, if there is something there that is holding me back, something that I should work on. I don't really know if there is or not.

Maybe I just like being alone too much, so that's what the Universe gives me.

I share this attitude very much and I like Pyrogen's original post. I am yet to work out if I am holding on to a limiting belief. I just love life and people and I am very happy but occasionally, I wonder if I need that 'special someone'. I am reading Kathyrn Woodward Thomas' book at the moment and will read the others recommended. Great posts - thanks all.

[pyrogen]

Originally Posted by JoRichards

I share this attitude very much and I like Pyrogen's original post. I am yet to work out if I am holding on to a limiting belief. I just love life and people and I am very happy but occasionally, I wonder if I need that 'special someone'. I am reading Kathyrn Woodward Thomas' book at the moment and will read the others recommended. Great posts - thanks all.

Actually, Kathryn Woodward Thomas' stuff helped me a great deal. We often get hung up on the "package"... what love is supposed to look like. In her own case, she fell in love with a man who happened to be African American, and she had a lot of limiting beliefs based upon her upbringing that affected her "package". I had the same thing, feeling I must marry the ideal Jewish male doctor/professional but more of the time having crushes on female friends, often ones who were more creative and "healer" type of personalities. You have to distinguish between what you want and what your mom wants for you.

Possibly a way to do this is to make a list... "Who does my mom want me to marry?"... before you even tackle what YOU want.

Also, crushes are not love - they're more about the person having the crush.

And liking a set of characteristics is not the same as liking the person.

[jellyfishgiang]

Hmm I am letting go of my crush. We've been sharing much romance and I am sure he also has feelings for me but we are holding back, our feelings are not strong enough to claim that we are gf-bf. Right now I am not sure if he is the one for me so I've decided to set him free and intended to manifest The One to appear and enter my life. Fought with the idea of texting to tell him that I like him and yeah I did it 'cause I thought my heart feelings deserved to be recognized and spoken out. I believe when I recognize and accept my feelings, it'll be easier for me to get over it . So I did it, right now I feel abit scared that things will turn awkward, we'll not see each other much as we do now and it kind of hurts. I'm appreciating him and the romance we shared while trying to tell myself to rest assured that I'm doing this to make room for The One to come. If he's the one, he'll stay. If he's not, he'll go and The One comes. Then I should be grateful to myself for letting go of him and making room for The One.

Aww easier said than done. Still abit emotional right now... I need more time to get over it . Anyway, I'm truly appreciating this crush. It's beautiful. Thank God

[spacecadetglow]

Originally Posted by jellyfishgiang

Hmm I am letting go of my crush. We've been sharing much romance and I am sure he also has feelings for me but we are holding back, our feelings are not strong enough to claim that we are gf-bf. Right now I am not sure if he is the one for me so I've decided to set him free and intended to manifest The One to appear and enter my life. Fought with the idea of texting to tell him that I like him and yeah I did it 'cause I thought my heart feelings deserved to be recognized and spoken out. I believe when I recognize and accept my feelings, it'll be easier for me to get over it . So I did it, right now I feel abit scared that things will turn awkward, we'll not see each other much as we do now and it kind of hurts. I'm appreciating him and the romance we shared while trying to tell myself to rest assured that I'm doing this to make room for The One to come. If he's the one, he'll stay. If he's not, he'll go and The One comes. Then I should be grateful to myself for letting go of him and making room for The One.

Aww easier said than done. Still abit emotional right now... I need more time to get over it . Anyway, I'm truly appreciating this crush. It's beautiful. Thank God

Omigosh! This reminds me so much of what I went through...

I let him go, but he came back. We held on as we disconnected. Strange stuff. I have no idea if he's The One or not, or if I'm too focused on that for it to even be a part of my reality right now, but things are much better now that I let him go and got him back. lol!

[pyrogen]

Originally Posted by spacecadetglow

Omigosh! This reminds me so much of what I went through...

I let him go, but he came back. We held on as we disconnected. Strange stuff. I have no idea if he's The One or not, or if I'm too focused on that for it to even be a part of my reality right now, but things are much better now that I let him go and got him back. lol!

I've heard of that.

And to the crush person: it's totally best to let go of a crush; crushes are usually about the person having the crush.

You don't really *know* this person; that takes time. You're basically filling in the gaps with your imagination.

I am speaking as someone who just got over a crush on someone I'd only just met. The crush wasn't going to benefit either of us, I already knew from the outset that she wanted something else, and I already knew that my own fantasies weren't going to honor her reality. I dealt with it. Of course, given my history of falling for straight-ish women, I have plenty of practice at this and it's never really about me.

The thing is, though, it still never really is about you. People can be on two different paths, that's all it is. All a crush means is that someone matches your "love map" in your unconscious mind.

And as I said before, crushes can also help you identify what characteristics you find attractive, and sometimes they come along in your life for reasons other than getting with that person.

If you're going to manifest, you really do best to do it with a blank slate. It works much better than when your energy is tied up with a specific person.

It's not even helpful to have a crush on someone with whom you are starting a relationship - you're not in the "present time" with them or really honoring their reality. You're caught up in your own wishes.

[spacecadetglow]

Yeah, it's weird, I never had "crush" feelings with this guy. Which is part of what made me want to call it off before. I missed that intensity, but here I am finding something much more solid that's based in reality.

I'm not, like, bowled over and feeling like I want to have 9,000 of his babies but then again... I am sort of bowled over. Just that someone can be so kind, so understanding, and selfless. It's truly felt like an enlightened relationship if there ever was one.

I think in the long run, I value that over the druggy crush feelings...

[pyrogen]

Originally Posted by spacecadetglow

Yeah, it's weird, I never had "crush" feelings with this guy. Which is part of what made me want to call it off before. I missed that intensity, but here I am finding something much more solid that's based in reality.

I'm not, like, bowled over and feeling like I want to have 9,000 of his babies but then again... I am sort of bowled over. Just that someone can be so kind, so understanding, and selfless. It's truly felt like an enlightened relationship if there ever was one.

I think in the long run, I value that over the druggy crush feelings...

Experience.

If you've had more crushes than actual relationships, that can happen... you can overvalue the crush feelings.

[spacecadetglow]

Originally Posted by pyrogen

Experience.

If you've had more crushes than actual relationships, that can happen... you can overvalue the crush feelings.

Oh wow. Bingo. Lightbulbs flashing. Haha!

It's crazy, but I think you're right. It occurred to me recently that I have no idea what a healthy, mature, adult relationship is supposed to be like. My things were always off-kilter in some crucial way: either he was more into me than I was into him, OR he'd be emotionally unavailable and I'd end up feeling needy and deprived.

It really threw me at first to click with someone so well but not be overwhelmed by the crush feelings. I was pushing so hard to have those feelings, because I thought that's what I wanted, but something major just shifted when I let him go and then let him come back... or rather, went back to him myself.

I started to actually have feelings for him.

It just feels so... easy. So manageable. I'm just not worried about anything anymore in this connection, just letting things happen and letting feelings deepen, which they have. Go figure.

[pyrogen]

Originally Posted by spacecadetglow

Oh wow. Bingo. Lightbulbs flashing. Haha!

It's crazy, but I think you're right. It occurred to me recently that I have no idea what a healthy, mature, adult relationship is supposed to be like. My things were always off-kilter in some crucial way: either he was more into me than I was into him, OR he'd be emotionally unavailable and I'd end up feeling needy and deprived.

It really threw me at first to click with someone so well but not be overwhelmed by the crush feelings. I was pushing so hard to have those feelings, because I thought that's what I wanted, but something major just shifted when I let him go and then let him come back... or rather, went back to him myself.

I started to actually have feelings for him.

It just feels so... easy. So manageable. I'm just not worried about anything anymore in this connection, just letting things happen and letting feelings deepen, which they have. Go figure.

Yep Enjoy it, be in the moment, enjoy him. And don't analyze.

I'd wager that most healthy relationships probably don't start with heavy crush feelings.

Some people are able to handle a crush a little more lightly and playfully, but if you're not, it's better not to be in that space, I think, until you learn to handle it like that.

My ex-husband and I, and my ex-girlfriend and I, both started because they were very limerent on me and it was a very, very bad dynamic - there was so much tension between their fantasies of me and being unable to deal with the reality of me.

[spacecadetglow]

Originally Posted by pyrogen

Yep Enjoy it, be in the moment, enjoy him. And don't analyze.

I'd wager that most healthy relationships probably don't start with heavy crush feelings.

Some people are able to handle a crush a little more lightly and playfully, but if you're not, it's better not to be in that space, I think, until you learn to handle it like that.

My ex-husband and I, and my ex-girlfriend and I, both started because they were very limerent on me and it was a very, very bad dynamic - there was so much tension between their fantasies of me and being unable to deal with the reality of me.

Yes.

I know what you mean about the playful crush feeling -- I've had a few of those lately and they were really fun, never torturous like before.

I was very limerent (just learned what that word meant recently!) on my ex-boyfriend, and it was only literally 3 months ago, 2 and a half years after we'd broken up, that I felt like I was seeing him for Who He Was and not some idealized fantasy I had in my head.

As soon as I saw who he really was, it was at that moment that I decided I truly did not want to be with him. And at that moment I was over it, over him, for good.

One thing that strikes me as interesting is that I really like who I am when I'm with him (new guy). I feel interesting, bubbly, flirtatious, funny, smart, etc. I'm more focused on my experience than on fantasies about him. It's kind of disconcerting, actually... at first I was like, "this CAN'T be a romantic connection, it feels nothing like what I'm used to!" So I abandoned ship. But then, only after I'd let him go and called it off, the romantic feelings started happening. WTF?

Okay, I do believe I've talked your ear off about this enough. :P