Duality of each moment

[Ged]

Yeah, sorry for the pompous title, it's in my blood.

First of all, hi, as you can tell from my post count I'm new here. I've been reading the blog for almost two years now, and I've learned a lot from it.

My problem is as follows: LoA/IM works in small but joyful ways. But whenever something GOOD happens, something BAD follows almost instantly. Like, whenever I feel calm and happy, I get into a fight with a friend.

This has happened so many times to me that I've grown to accept its inevitability as fact. How do I break this belief?

I can't even feel elation or excitement without a flicker of dread lumbering along in tow.

All of my days have recently been a contrast between incredible happiness and frustration/anger.

[Nea]

Welcome! I also consider myself as a newby although I have 30 and something posts .
What you wrote, sound familiar, maybe not to that extent that something bad instantly follows the good thing, but I definitely detected the pattern of good and bad phases, too. And was thinking a lot about that. Seems to me that, if everything would be perfect for me, I would feel a little bored, however bizarre it may sound . When everything is great, I'm not sure what to do next, don't have any goals in front of me, so I probably attract something "bad" so I can do something with it . And of course, it took me a while to detect those feelings - it's subconscious.

That is one possible explanation. Here is the other one: when you feel a great happiness, maybe you perceive that you don't deserve to get even more of that. Maybe you think that "now is time for things to go down". Do you feel guilty on some level when everything works great for you?

[ButterflyWoman]

Originally Posted by Ged

But whenever something GOOD happens, something BAD follows almost instantly.

Most likely, you hold a deep belief that this is how things always work, or how they always work for you.

Originally Posted by Ged

Like, whenever I feel calm and happy, I get into a fight with a friend.

Just a guess, but did you happen to grow up in an environment where there was a lot of drama, or a lot of "waiting for the other shoe to drop" or similar? People who do have childhood situations like that often have this pattern of belief, which is why I ask (you don't have to answer if you don't want to; it's more a question for you to explore).

Originally Posted by Ged

I've grown to accept its inevitability as fact.

Well, there you go.

Originally Posted by Ged

How do I break this belief?

That's trickier. There are various things that work for people. Many folks like EFT (you can find out more with a simple Google search), or ho'oponono (hope I spelled that right). I kind of like asking my subconscious to show me the belief and then when I see it, I can dissolve it in various ways (most commonly these days, I pull it out by the roots, like a weed, but I have also used self-hypnosis and the simple breaking down of the belief with logic/reason, which works very well for me).

Another thing that works very well for me is to claim back my energy/power from the pattern, without going into where it came from or why it's there. I used to have to know all about it, why I carried it with me, etc. etc. (too much cognitive therapy! ), but now I just spot it, see it, acknowledge it, own that I, for whatever reasons, created the pattern, and pull the energy back out of it, using a combination of statements and visualisation. I do it kind of on the fly, depending on the nature of the pattern. Some patterns have to be revisited multiple times.

And yes, I got the above technique from "Busting Loose from the Money Game". There are a couple of threads around this forum about that book and the techniques if you want to read some more.

Originally Posted by Ged

All of my days have recently been a contrast between incredible happiness and frustration/anger.

That's an uncomfortable pattern. I'm sure you had a reason for it, but whatever it was, it doesn't serve you now, clearly.

I hope you find exactly the right way to work this for yourself. Different things for different people.

[cylon]

LOA is scary.

Not at first. When you manifest small happy things, the joy and elation that comes from it is amazing. It just feels RIGHT.

The scary part comes afterwords. After you have gotten over the initial burst of joy that accompanies your manifestation, the ego comes out to play.

LOA is based on the idea that you create your entire reality. Ego is based on the idea that you are separate from your reality, and that things happen TO you.

I think we cling to our identities and our egos. If we spend our entire lives thinking we are separate, can you imagine that changing that belief might cause a bit of disruption in your life? Maybe some resistance?

Well, if you create your reality, that means that your feelings of resistance and fear of a new way of life would be manifested in your reality. If there is lots of fear of change, wouldn't that fear of change manifest in your reality? Wouldn't lots of things that would make you change course back to the old, safe way start to appear? Stuff like arguments, things going wrong? All those things reinforce the idea that you are separate, and that you don't create your reality, that things are happening TO you.

It's funny how things going our way and just feeling good can be such a threat to whatever is hidden inside of us that doesn't believe in those things. And I think it will do whatever it can to not experience it.

[Acting Like Godot]

Originally Posted by Ged

My problem is as follows: LoA/IM works in small but joyful ways. But whenever something GOOD happens, something BAD follows almost instantly. Like, whenever I feel calm and happy, I get into a fight with a friend.

I wonder if your problem is the same as mine.

I suffer from the over-effectiveness of the LOA. For example, I may manifest for outstanding career success. Then suddenly, in the next few weeks, I am besieged by all kinds of complex, high-profile work.

While it is all very exciting from a career point of view, it also throws the rest of my life into imbalance.

Are you perhaps asking for something, and then when it comes, it comes too intensely for you to handle? For example (just as an illustration), are you asking for very close social interaction, and it's so close that it leads to friction between you and your friends?

[Nea]

Originally Posted by cylon

LOA is scary.

Not at first. When you manifest small happy things, the joy and elation that comes from it is amazing. It just feels RIGHT.

The scary part comes afterwords. After you have gotten over the initial burst of joy that accompanies your manifestation, the ego comes out to play.

LOA is based on the idea that you create your entire reality. Ego is based on the idea that you are separate from your reality, and that things happen TO you.

I think we cling to our identities and our egos. If we spend our entire lives thinking we are separate, can you imagine that changing that belief might cause a bit of disruption in your life? Maybe some resistance?

Well, if you create your reality, that means that your feelings of resistance and fear of a new way of life would be manifested in your reality. If there is lots of fear of change, wouldn't that fear of change manifest in your reality? Wouldn't lots of things that would make you change course back to the old, safe way start to appear? Stuff like arguments, things going wrong? All those things reinforce the idea that you are separate, and that you don't create your reality, that things are happening TO you.

It's funny how things going our way and just feeling good can be such a threat to whatever is hidden inside of us that doesn't believe in those things. And I think it will do whatever it can to not experience it.

Wow, very interesting point of view, and very helpful and true! Thanks for that .