Anyone else catch themselves manifesting struggle?

[Zem]

I started meditating recently, which I think is part of the reason I caught myself doing this -- more and quicker onset of awareness...

Here is a simple example, I wanted to go out and buy a shirt, and I'm a pretty picky shopper, can take a long time, and quickly grow to hate it once it starts taking too long.

I mentally prepped myself for a long and drawn out meander through the local stores, and then the first store I went to, I saw exactly what I wanted, and there was an immediate and quick flash of disappointment, like I was looking forward to the grind through the rest of the stores.

Has anyone else shared this kind of an experience? Why do you think we do it?

[Bradshaw]

I do this too sometimes.

Put simply, sometimes a little challenge is fun.

If there was no struggle whatsoever in your entire life; If you simply had anything you wanted with a snap of your fingers; If you did not have to make an effort in anything at all, would it really be satisfying?

Challenge is fun. Learning to ride a bicycle is a challenge; it's a struggle. But isn't it also fun?

You're not the first person i've seen who manifests obstacles for himself either. Is it a bad thing? Nah. You can manifest for your life to flow effortessly or you can manifest some obstacles, but i think we have a natural tendency to simply make up these obstacles, because:

They help us grow.

Limiting beliefs, physical barriers, skeptics. Oh, the things we manifest.

[Judge]

Ego enjoys struggle, it's a place for it to grow, so it can say 'look at me' to the other egos. The 5 senses validate your reality and your ego grows out of that validation. The problem arises when the ego thinks it is the creator and simply not the validator.

So your ego runs around looking for reality to label as problems to nest inside of to help it grow and to compete with all the other egos and to show itself off.

Your ego is a tool for validating reality, trouble arises when it seeks to identify itself as creative and notices all the other egos doing the same, then competition arises.

As ego is easily collective, it finds the best growth in negativity (common society trait) which is struggle, stress, complaining, blaming. The way around all of this is to not to identify with your ego. Nothing can truly satisfy the ego, even when it gets everything it desires, it's still not enough.

Create from source, it's what you do everyday, without even noticing, who creates the reality you reside in everyday? Ego? No. Identify with that which you are. It's right there in front of you, but ego always looks away.

Judge

[nownow]

Originally Posted by Zem

I started meditating recently, which I think is part of the reason I caught myself doing this -- more and quicker onset of awareness...

Here is a simple example, I wanted to go out and buy a shirt, and I'm a pretty picky shopper, can take a long time, and quickly grow to hate it once it starts taking too long.

I mentally prepped myself for a long and drawn out meander through the local stores, and then the first store I went to, I saw exactly what I wanted, and there was an immediate and quick flash of disappointment, like I was looking forward to the grind through the rest of the stores.

Has anyone else shared this kind of an experience? Why do you think we do it?

Maybe your goal of buying a shirt was not your primary goal. Maybe a part of you enjoys the hassle of shopping, struggle may be preferable to boredom. Maybe your obsessive. Just suggestions.

[Zem]

Thanks you for your comments, I've been thinking some of these same things too, and it's gratifying to see others share them, even better when they are more fleshed out and extended.

nownow: I think you've really called some things about my situation, I definitely have a fear of boredom, I don't watch TV anymore, and don't aimlessly browse the web and the thought of having to fill the day without those crutches is scary. Never thought of myself as obsessive, but now I think perhaps I'm a little.

Judge: what did you mean by ego as a validator? I'll browse through your old posts, perhaps it'll become clear.

Bradshaw: I think you are right about struggle being fun, I don't think struggle is the right word, I've been trying to come up with a better one, maybe vigorous action?

I think I'll try to manifest less struggle, and certainly not for simple silly things like shopping. If for the moment I must have struggle, I prefer it be for some worthier, more creative pursuits.

[Strem2]

Originally Posted by Zem

I mentally prepped myself for a long and drawn out meander through the local stores, and then the first store I went to, I saw exactly what I wanted, and there was an immediate and quick flash of disappointment, like I was looking forward to the grind through the rest of the stores.

Has anyone else shared this kind of an experience? Why do you think we do it?

Sometimes. Yesterday my partner and I were distressed over something that came in the mail. I had the feeling, "Oh there it is...." like I had been happy and relaxed and feeling successful for too long.

With more meditating, these times become less frequent, and the good, joyful times become more your sop.

Love.

[pyrogen]

I'm doing intense money manifestation right now and have been getting surprise debts in the mail. As in, money I should not even owe. Like, a company wanting me to pay them back money they refunded me. WTF.

Or, in the past, I'd get the money but then a lot of unexpected stuff would come up just at the time I had it so that I would end up as broke as I started off. The car picks THAT day to break down. I came up with 4500 to go to a school program I wanted to go to, and somehow managed to manifest emergencies and stuff that ate up nearly ALL of the money.

I know that the manifestation experts are saying this is because I'm coming from the place of scarcity so I'm just manifesting more scarcity.

I've switched to just doing deep-level hypnotic suggestion type of manifestation, I don't trust my conscious mind yet not to mess this one up. I'm working on prosperity/abundance, "I am rich" type thinking, rather than even dealing with survival mode. I do not work on "I have enough for all my bills" or "I will pay x bill" but instead, visualize a life of luxury where the bases are all covered but there is plenty left over and I am also able to be a philanthropist and be able to give a lot of money and time Why settle for visualizing yourself having a job when you can visualize being like Bill Gates. Shoot for the stars and you might hit the moon. I surround myself with positive imagery about rich people, read their magazines, and study them pretty intensely. I've gotten higher quality and better paid jobs from manifesting money than from manifesting a job.

One of the reasons I think a lot of women for a long time have been better at manifesting solutions out of problems is because little girls grow up pretending to be royalty (above the problem completely), whereas little boys pretend to be soldiers and working class people. Different mindset is schooled here.

My mom is an expert manifester but never manages to manifest prosperity, for years all she managed to do was save her butt from eviction over and over. the money always came through, but only JUST ENOUGH. Same problem.

I live with an ex-partner who is struggling, is highly negative and is in poverty mode in his head all the time, that doesn't help. I am working on moving right now, things will look a lot better. I really did not have the issue with manifesting so much scarcity prior to him. I also had trouble manifesting work when the majority of my friends were jobless floaters.

The people you are around have a TREMENDOUS impact on you, if you are still at the novice level. A majority of us aren't strong enough to resist the thinking of our friends/relatives/people around us.