The Value in the Virtue of Patience!

[Johnny Soporno]

Ah, if only 'common sense' were common...

There's an ancient Chinese proverb which asks:

Q: "When is the right time to plant a tree?"
A: "Twenty years ago... But the next best time is right now!"

Lately, I have been trying to help mentor some newer players of The Game of Life - trying to help answer some of those frustrating questions which plague everyone until that light goes on, and they begin to have their AHA! moments...

Sometimes I can help by dishing out experience, sometimes as history, more often packaged in analogy or metaphor, ideally Socratically stepping-through things; other times, I can only tell 'em what they're GOING to understand later, hopefully sometime soon - and suggest they accept what I'm saying.

Many mundane things must be seen to be believed - but REALLY cool things often must be believed before they can be seen...

With that in mind, I consider myself fortunate in that I am in a good position actually to demonstrate a lot of things which would otherwise appear to be airy-fairy fantasy B.S., and not worth considering attempting...

I have been lucky in that most of the people I've been coaching are 'Recovering Pick-Up Artists', most of whom have had the experience of "Sarging", (approaching attractive strangers, against your inhibitions, as a 'numbers game') which is a great example of something which QUICKLY proves itself, despite its being counter-intuitive and counter-upbringing.

It only takes a short time before one discovers that while women don't like to be 'bothered' by men, they sure do enjoy becoming 'hot and bothered' by men - and the difference is all in the self-confidence and lack of inhibition of the man approaching.

Another ancient & wonderful Eastern proverb - "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step!"

I tell a lot of fellas that "Doing what you see me doing, and saying what you hear me saying, won't get you what you watch me getting!" - at least, not until they understand holistically WHY it works... and that takes time; but more, it takes confidence in the eventual outcome.

Since this confidence is NOT unreasoned, nor unfounded, it isn't "faith" - it's a rational appreciation of the difference between WHERE YOU ARE NOW, and WHERE YOU WILL BE EVENTUALLY.

If you don't BELIEVE you will eventually "Get It", then merely TRYING can becomes daunting and depressing... especially if you lack ONE THING which is critical in the formative period - and that is PATIENCE.

Patience is a form of temper-management... the emotional maturity to accept situations for how they actually ARE, not how you WISH they were; and to accept the necessity to take action, or actively to wait, to enable sufficient external OR INTERNAL changes to take place, ideally
bringing you what you were after initially.

Note that 'actively waiting' is not the same as 'not doing anything' - it's avoiding taking inappropriate actions through CONSCIOUSLY doing nothing (at least, nothing directly related to the subject).

While being eager to paint your home might make waiting for the first coat of paint to dry and cure nearly unbearable, it doesn't mean you can put a second-coat on any earlier... it just means you might feel angsty and resentful while waiting, or worse, you'll ignore natural laws and slap another coat on prematurely... And just end up increasing the time and frustration levels once you realize you've gained nothing and used up all your paint!


Just as you can't produce a newborn baby by impregnating nine women and waiting one month... (although it might be fun to try ) some things cannot be rushed - they require time to settle, to mature, and to evolve.

Once you REALLY appreciate that, lots of other good things begin to fall into place.

Hope this helps!


Johnny Soporno
Worthy Playboy

[Judge]

I like chinese proverbs........

Walk a hundred miles in another mans shoes to truly know him.........

Then you will be a hundred miles away......and you will have his shoes

Judge

[Angela]

Originally Posted by Johnny Soporno

Q: "When is the right time to plant a tree?"
A: "Twenty years ago... But the next best time is right now!"

I love that, Johnny!

It also goes along the old Angelanian proverb:

"Don't make the mistake of thinking I'm not doing anything, just because I'm doing nothing!"

[Johnny Soporno]

Originally Posted by Angela

"Don't make the mistake of thinking I'm not doing anything, just because I'm doing nothing!"

Yuppers!

To opt explicitly to TAKE NO ACTION, but rather to allow events to unfold without direct intervention, requires a sense of acceptance which is entirely too rare.

Choosing TO DO NOTHING is only an option once one has come to comfort with the notion that THEY ARE NOT THE PRIME MOTIVATOR of the Universe!



Johnny Soporno
Worthy Playboy

[cylon]

Originally Posted by Johnny Soporno

Choosing TO DO NOTHING is only an option once one has come to comfort with the notion that THEY ARE NOT THE PRIME MOTIVATOR of the Universe!

I heard this term to describe Clint Eastwood: "Dynamic Lethargy".

The principle of appearing to do nothing, yet doing everything, because you're in tune with everything.

Wu-Wei. Right Action.

[MancsAdonis]

If you don't BELIEVE you will eventually "Get It", then merely TRYING can becomes daunting and depressing... especially if you lack ONE THING which is critical in the formative period - and that is PATIENCE.

Too right! its the thing i struggle with the most! i need to fix up on my LOA skills

[magi13]

Nice quotes, it shows to let things NATURALLY fall into place. ^^, Patience and moderation.