Is it ok to let yourself feel some pain?

[cmiddlebrook]

I'm going through a hard time with my relationship at the moment and obviously I'm trying to use LoA to focus on what I want etc etc. I'm trying not to focus on what if we split up etc though of course its hard not to.

What I've noticed though is that I've become obsessed with trying to feel good that I'm worrying about worrying! Any time I get a negative thought and start feeling bad, I begin to panic because I'm worried that having those thoughts will just manifest them.

My mum said to me today that I should just have a good cry. They say that what you resist persists and sure if I resist us splitting then it might happen but if I keep resisting feeling pain, won't I just keep feeling it?

It feels like I'm just trying too hard. I'm hurting right now and it's too hard to stay focused on the positive all the time. Is it ok to just let myself feel it now and then, wallow in it for a bit and then try to get back on top?

As far as the relationship goes, there's nothing I can really do. My partner needs time I think and I need to give it to her so my only "work" as I see it is to just sit back and wait - just allow it and try to accept what happens.

I'm just finding it so hard to stay positive while I wait the outcome of her decision.

[supertom]

accept whats going on and surrender to it. you'll feel pain but it wont hurt

[AttractIt]

Hi cmiddlebrook,

I trully understand you, it's very "human" to act like you act,
But,
I think you should keep in mind not to fight against yourself,
Try to bring good and healthy thoughts, that make you feel better, you'll still have bad ones, and that's OK, you cannot, as I see it, make them go away forever.
Just try harder to see what is it that make you feel good with yourself.

Take Care,

[RT Wolf]

My sympathies. While the regular IM material seems to suggest you stay happy all the time even if it is by ignoring your feelings, I disagree. I prefer Eckhart Tolle's idea of Acceptence and the peace that results.

I suggest you pick up the Power of Now. It has given me great comfort in times of emotional distress, without feeling like I was simply trying to suppress my emotions, but rather accepting them and accepting the situation as it is.

Good luck!

[Jennihul]

Pain is the gift of contrast in the world of LOA where there is really no good or bad events, just good or bad feelings.

Feeling bad is what makes feeling good possible in a world of duality. Just like knowing the dark makes one realize the blessings of the dawn.

Don't fight your sadness. Just don't let it consume you. Grieving is a natural part of life.

Jennifer

[wolfgang]

Originally Posted by cmiddlebrook

I'm going through a hard time with my relationship at the moment and obviously I'm trying to use LoA to focus on what I want etc etc. I'm trying not to focus on what if we split up etc though of course its hard not to.

What I've noticed though is that I've become obsessed with trying to feel good that I'm worrying about worrying! Any time I get a negative thought and start feeling bad, I begin to panic because I'm worried that having those thoughts will just manifest them.

My mum said to me today that I should just have a good cry. They say that what you resist persists and sure if I resist us splitting then it might happen but if I keep resisting feeling pain, won't I just keep feeling it?

if you think about it, not expressing the pain is a way to internally hold onto that feeling, which puts that vibe into the mix. so actually letting the feeling run through you would release it more so than keeping it inside. don't worry about manifesting the feeling when you let it out, but do worry about manifesting situations that will match the suppressed feelings you are holding in. The universe will start giving you more chances to express the feeling until you let it out, imho.

It feels like I'm just trying too hard. I'm hurting right now and it's too hard to stay focused on the positive all the time. Is it ok to just let myself feel it now and then, wallow in it for a bit and then try to get back on top?

As far as the relationship goes, there's nothing I can really do. My partner needs time I think and I need to give it to her so my only "work" as I see it is to just sit back and wait - just allow it and try to accept what happens.

I'm just finding it so hard to stay positive while I wait the outcome of her decision.

yeah, loa shouldn't be about trying to stay positive all the time. I wouldn't allow wallowing though. You have to release the pain. Wallowing implies indulging too much - don't make it into you life story but certainly feel what feelings are there and take note of them to reflect on what's important to you or what you are attached to.