Believing in the Unseen

[Guy665]

Hi,

I have some questions and would appreciate some feedback.

I have been spending a lot of time exploring each area of my life and working out very precise goals for each area.

For example one of my goals in the area of relationships is the following -

" I am in a deeply fullfilling and meaningful relationship with a wonderful stunning girl".

I know this is exaclty what I want and I have been supporting this intention with daily visulisations, positve affirmations, vision boards and even seeding (the feeling of having aquired it already).

For example as part of my morning workout routine I actually spend 10 minutes while warming up repeating the following "I am so happy and grateful NOW that I am in deeply fullfilling and meaningful relationship with a wonderful stunning girl". I actually get the feeling that I am in the relationship and feel very excited and great.

The problem is that at the moment I haven't yet attracted this relationship and I find it hard to believe it when my reality is the opposite. I do all this work really trying to believe it and then my mind takes over and tells me the opposite. For example even though I can convince myself for a time that the relationship is a reality when I'm lying in bed on my own my mind likes to tell me the exact opposite.

Does anybody have any ideas on how to keep believing the intention when what it is that I want to attract is not yet reality?

I hope this makes sense, really what I am saying is how can I keep the faith when my reality is the exact opposite.

Any comments would be apprecaited.

[cdn2wheeler]

Welcome to the board.

I know exactly what you mean, almost word-for-word. For the past number of weeks I've been doing almost exactly the same thing and it's paid off in small ways, but not totally yet. I've been on a couple of dates with some very attractive, sensual and brilliant women but nothing's yet manifested in the area of something more serious. One potential relationship that I thought had some real possibilities started great but never really got off the ground, leaving me hurt and confused.

I don't have any hard-and-fast advice to give other than just to keep doing what you're doing. Yes, it's hard to trust "the universe" sometimes because you never know what's around the next corner. Thankfully, you never know what's around the next corner.

Just do your best to stay positive and focused. That's what I'm doing, anyway.

[Asmoday]

Are both of you going out there and meeting a lot of new people?

I mean, A LOT of new people?

[Rose of Cairo]

Originally Posted by Guy665

Does anybody have any ideas on how to keep believing the intention when what it is that I want to attract is not yet reality?

I hope this makes sense, really what I am saying is how can I keep the faith when my reality is the exact opposite.

Maybe it would help you to read this article: A better life. Steve explains there how to intend while staying focused on the present. Alternatively, you can use probabilities. So when you're lying alone in your bed, you'll think "the slope (or probability) is increasing permanently, I'm getting closer and closer to that relationship." and that's not a contradiction to your intention. Intending in present tense is hazardous.

Another method would be the the "wouldn't it be nice?" Method we discussed in this thread. You can read my post here. It's about this topic.

About generally keeping faith although your reality is the opposite... First of all examine what your usual thoughts currently are. You'll see that your reality IS their manifestation. Then you'll realize that you create everything. And once you know that, you'll have faith and work on your thoughts. It's useless to think something positive ten minutes a day if you think negative stuff the remaining 23 hours and 50 minutes.

best wishes on your way

[cdn2wheeler]

Originally Posted by Rose of Cairo

So when you're lying alone in your bed, you'll think "the slope (or probability) is increasing permanently, I'm getting closer and closer to that relationship." and that's not a contradiction to your intention. Intending in present tense is hazardous.

Ummm... are you sure about this?

Almost everything I've seen or read about LoA is to speak of your desires as if you already have them and are thankful for them.

Or perhaps I misunderstood... very possible, on a somewhat grey and caffeine-deprived Monday morning...

[Rose of Cairo]

Well I don't know how this is for other people... but if I said "I have a lot of money" I would immediately think "No I have not obviously" and that would destroy my intention.

Important to attract what you want is that your feeling about it is good and happy.

When I think "the probability that I have a lot of money is increasing right now and permanently" I have a very good feeling, because that's true, so I have no contraditory thoughts.

If I think "wouldn't it be nice to have a lot of money?" my thoughts about having a lot of money can only be positive too, because yes, it would be nice. No contradictory thoughts either.

From the moment you want something, it's already true, you already have it. The point is to let it come into your life. And that will only happen when you have a good feeling about it. How can you attract a relationship when you feel disappointed and bad 374 times a day thinking of it, because you think that you don't have one?

Find out what works best for you. For me personally, intending in present tense doesn't work. Maybe it's different for you.

I mean, you should imagine you already have it, and feel you have it, but you don't need to think you have it. Intending is not about convincing yourself your reality is not the reality you're living in. It's about developing a good feeling for someting in order to invite it into your life.

[Zukin]

Spend more time focusing on what you want instead of the lack of what you want.

The "wouldn't it be nice if..." process from Ask and It Is Given is good for these purposes, where you can think something like:
"Wouldn't it be nice if I was in a relationship with a kind and attractive woman"

This process gets you focused on creatively imagining something rather than focusing on the lack of it in your life.

[Acting Like Godot]

If you are getting all hung up over your present tense and future tense, I would suggest you just go for visualisation plain & simple. Notice that images are just images.

[impaul99]

You might also look into whether or not you're conditioning your mind with "Single Guy" stuff. Meaning, you may state your intention verbally 10 times a day, but then be counter-intending with singleton thinking.

For example, do you watch movies which show single guys having fun, drinking beer, partying, having no attachments and no committments? Do you look at sports cars on the road typically driven by single guys heading to/from a club? Do you hang out with all your friends that are also single, or do you hang out and talk to friends who have girlfriends?

One thing I did when I was originally trying to find a girlfriend was to hang out with 2 of my other single buddies and do all kinds of stuff where all three of us would try to get around girls. THe thing is that we were 3 single guys partying with a bunch of other single girls. And it was kinda fun.

Then, one day I decided, "Ok, I'm tired of this, I'd rather just find a girlfriend than hang out with my single friends." and shortly after I met my wife.

It wasn't until I made that realization though. If you know some married people, or at least some people in relationships, see if you can get invited to like their kids birthday parties, or a house warming, or some type of event that people go to who are already in relationships. Meaning, if you're at a party that hosts 30 people, there should be you, plus maybe one other single guy there tops and the rest should be people in relationships except for hopefully a few single women as well

I think that might put you in a totally different frame of mind than being in a social setting with 300 single men and 100 single women at a club. There you're absorbing "Singleton" thoughts unconsciously.

Just some ideas on what helped me out. Just repeating words might not be enough.

[torilink]

Originally Posted by Rose of Cairo

Well I don't know how this is for other people... but if I said "I have a lot of money" I would immediately think "No I have not obviously" and that would destroy my intention.

It isn't the present moment statement that is destroying your intention, it is your belief, you don't believe you have that money right now, so there is no alignment.

Originally Posted by Rose of Cairo

Important to attract what you want is that your feeling about it is good and happy.

no, this is incorrect - it isn't that you must feel good about it or be happy, these feelings are a natural consequence of being in alignment. When you are aligned, you cannot feel otherwise.

Originally Posted by Rose of Cairo

When I think "the probability that I have a lot of money is increasing right now and permanently" I have a very good feeling, because that's true, so I have no contraditory thoughts.

well, you could do this and sssssllllllloooooowwwwwlllllyyyyy inch your way into the manifestation, or you can examine your beliefs, change them and instantly manifest.

Originally Posted by Rose of Cairo

If I think "wouldn't it be nice to have a lot of money?" my thoughts about having a lot of money can only be positive too, because yes, it would be nice. No contradictory thoughts either.

this is wishful thinking and doesn't really help the manifestation process. It won't hurt it, but it won't allow it either.

Originally Posted by Rose of Cairo

From the moment you want something, it's already true, you already have it.

Yes this is truth. You are also contradicting yourself and what you said before.

you said: "but if I said "I have a lot of money" I would immediately think "No I have not obviously" and that would destroy my intention."

and I said above: "It isn't the present moment statement that is destroying your intention, it is your belief, you don't believe you have that money right now, so there is no alignment."

you know the truth - and that is that everything you desire already exists, so you should always always use the present tense when thinking, visualizing, or talking about your desires. It exists NOW for you, it is there, you just haven't allowed it yet. You allow by accepting it is there NOW.

Originally Posted by Rose of Cairo

The point is to let it come into your life. And that will only happen when you have a good feeling about it. How can you attract a relationship when you feel disappointed and bad 374 times a day thinking of it, because you think that you don't have one?

no, the point is to change your beliefs about it so you can align and accept your natural state of feeling good. This is where some trip up, you don't just try to change your thoughts about a subject, they will just come back - you have to go to the source of the thoughts - your belief system.

Originally Posted by Rose of Cairo

Find out what works best for you. For me personally, intending in present tense doesn't work. Maybe it's different for you.

I mean, you should imagine you already have it, and feel you have it, but you don't need to think you have it. Intending is not about convincing yourself your reality is not the reality you're living in. It's about developing a good feeling for someting in order to invite it into your life.

the feelings you have about anything have no causal effect - they create nothing. They are a signal to you about your alignment (beliefs aligned with desired state of being) by paying attention, we can align ourselves and perceive the desired manifestations.

[torilink]

Originally Posted by Acting Like Godot

If you are getting all hung up over your present tense and future tense, I would suggest you just go for visualisation plain & simple. Notice that images are just images.

yes ALG I agree. It isn't necessary to time stamp our visualizations.

[Angela]

Guy665 and cdn, the perfect woman for you exists (actually many perfect women) and you are already related to her, you are already in a relationship with her. I mean that quite literally.

You are both being and doing what you need to be and do in preparation for your introduction to this woman. You are doing exactly the right things, like grooms getting ready for your wedding (sorry, cdn, maybe that's not the best image for you ), and maybe you are getting a little impatient just to get on with it, already. Still, you are making your ways toward each other (you and the girls, not guy and cdn!) in the perfect time for the good of everyone, you can be sure of that.

" I am in a deeply fullfilling and meaningful relationship with a wonderful stunning girl".

This is ALREADY true -- you are in a deeply fulfilling and meaningful relationship with a wonderful stunning girl. You just haven't met her yet. Just keep using this time to generate your best possible life (and maybe wash your sheets) so that she'll feel the way you want her to feel when she arrives: excited, comfortable, welcome, appreciated.

[impaul99]

Originally Posted by Angela

Guy665 and cdn, the perfect woman for you exists (actually many perfect women) and you are already related to her, you are already in a relationship with her. I mean that quite literally.

You are both being and doing what you need to be and do in preparation for your introduction to this woman. You are doing exactly the right things, like grooms getting ready for your wedding (sorry, cdn, maybe that's not the best image for you ), and maybe you are getting a little impatient just to get on with it, already. Still, you are making your ways toward each other (you and the girls, not guy and cdn!) in the perfect time for the good of everyone, you can be sure of that.



This is ALREADY true -- you are in a deeply fulfilling and meaningful relationship with a wonderful stunning girl. You just haven't met her yet. Just keep using this time to generate your best possible life (and maybe wash your sheets) so that she'll feel the way you want her to feel when she arrives: excited, comfortable, welcome, appreciated.

Absolutely true. When I met my wife, I felt like I've already known her forever.

[Angela]

And she's getting ready for you, too, don't forget. You can't rush a woman when she's getting ready .

Maybe she's just stepping off a plane in her move from her hometown to where you are now, and it's just a matter of waiting for her to go shop for the first flowers for her new home -- and you meet her in the floral department of the grocery store.

Maybe she just woke up yesterday with the realization that she has finally let go of her pain from the divorce; a marriage that taught her so much about being the adventurous, independent, loving woman she is now that you wouldn't have recognized her before she was married. And you two will compare notes on your respective marriages and find important things about them that you have in common.

Maybe she is currently finishing up reading "Ask and it is Given," and she is visualizing you: a handsome, growth-oriented, powerful, loving, dynamic, articulate gentleman (standing in front of a motorcycle?) whom she'd like to manifest in her own life.

Maybe she just needed to post bail! Nah, just kidding.

You two wouldn't have been ready for each other yesterday; she would have been in the air, or still thinking about her ex-husband, or hadn't gotten you clear in her mind yet. Give her some time, she's just touching up for you now.

[Guy665]

Thanks for all your comments they all make a lot of sense.

Especially what Angela has said. Strange as it seems I do know that the person it out there already and I often imagine what she is doing right now.

I guess we just haven't met yet and in the meantime I can use the time to work on myself and improve myself even more.

For me personally the ability to believe in the unseen has been difficult but the comments I have read re-affirm my faith and spur me on even further.

Thanks

[Rose of Cairo]

Torilink, what you say is a contradiction is not a contradiction, I just expressed myself in an unprecise manner.

I know and believe that from the moment I want something, I already have it, it's already true. But that's on some abstract level. What I want already exists, it's out there, on its way to me. But in my concrete, material life, I don't have it yet. It hasn't arrived yet. I first have to allow it to come into this concrete, material life.

Now the point is, how do you allow? You say, allowing means accepting you have it NOW. Well, yes, if you think "I have it now" and mean this abstract level, on this level that's true, you already have it, and I totally agree with you! But when I think "I have it now", I think of my concrete life now, and no, I cannot believe that I have it in this concrete life when I obviously don't have it.

That's why I prefer not to think "I have it", but use the "wouldn't it be nice" or probability methods. I don't think they are wishful thinking. They've worked well so far for me.

Are you really saying I should believe what is obviously not true? (again, it is true because it exists and is coming to me, but not true in my concrete life now)

I guess my mistake with "I have it now" is to think of my little concrete life instead of the bigger one where I already have everything I want. I should think of "I have it now" not as what exists in my material life but as this abstract level where I really already have it.

That means, I have to define "I have" differently, and shift my focus on there. Is that correct? I'll give it a try and see how it works!

[torilink]

Originally Posted by Rose of Cairo

Torilink, what you say is a contradiction is not a contradiction, I just expressed myself in an unprecise manner.

I know and believe that from the moment I want something, I already have it, it's already true. But that's on some abstract level. What I want already exists, it's out there, on its way to me. But in my concrete, material life, I don't have it yet. It hasn't arrived yet. I first have to allow it to come into this concrete, material life.

Now the point is, how do you allow? You say, allowing means accepting you have it NOW. Well, yes, if you think "I have it now" and mean this abstract level, on this level that's true, you already have it, and I totally agree with you! But when I think "I have it now", I think of my concrete life now, and no, I cannot believe that I have it in this concrete life when I obviously don't have it.

That's why I prefer not to think "I have it", but use the "wouldn't it be nice" or probability methods. I don't think they are wishful thinking. They've worked well so far for me.

Are you really saying I should believe what is obviously not true? (again, it is true because it exists and is coming to me, but not true in my concrete life now)

I guess my mistake with "I have it now" is to think of my little concrete life instead of the bigger one where I already have everything I want. I should think of "I have it now" not as what exists in my material life but as this abstract level where I really already have it.

That means, I have to define "I have" differently, and shift my focus on there. Is that correct? I'll give it a try and see how it works!

I know that you know, even if it is in an abstact way of knowing, that all of creation is yours.

All you need do is desire and perceive it in a nonphysical way - and therein lies the problem with seeing the unseen, it requires vision. Our egoic, logical, & yes concrete minds cannot "See" what is there and already exists because it lacks this vision.

this is because there are two "Systems" at work, the first is the one we've thought of as true our whole lives. Something happens outside of us, we react with thought, feelings, and physical actions - this is cause and effect as most of us understand it in physical experience.

example:
we experience through the physical senses > which causes a reactionary or judgmental thought (based upon our beliefs) > that causes a corresponding emotion > which causes us to desire.....something

Our life is basically reactionary - we are constantly reacting to what we think is happening outside ourself, all we see with our eyes we accept as truth.

When we shift into conscious creation, we are flipping this cause and effect process. We first accept that the primary cause of everything is thought NOT physical perception. Each thought (desire) has a supporting belief which aligns us so that we can perceive our desire manifest. Our emotions are the guide as to how closely these two are aligned. The stronger the supporting belief the faster the manifestation.

example
thought/desire > corresponding belief > perception > physical experience of the desired state

Getting to quicker manifestation means training the ego mind to stop believing everything it sees, because everything it see's isn't happening now it is a reflection of all past thoughts and beliefs. We have given it the illusion of reality, and suffer from our belief in it.

When you look with your physical eyes and see the appearance of a thing which is not what you desire, don't automatically react to the perception - it isn't truth, instead choose to dismiss what you see and choose not to value it. When we react to it either negatively or positively we are choosing to value it and make it real.

One way I work through this is to remind myself that what I see isn't true, and it will only remain "True" for me as long as I believe in it. Each time you look upon something you do not desire to be in your experience and pay any attention to it at all you're valuing it and giving it the illusion of reality.

One thing I do when I find myself reacting to the outside world instead of consciously creating is to stop myself, and tell myself how glad I am that that situation, experience, or whatever isn't real and that I don't need to see it unless I choose to value it.

I know I've rambled on, I hope this answers your question.

[cylon]

It answered some of mine though.

[torilink]

Here is a great quote from The Science of Getting Rich, it is a bit long - but well worth the few minutes to read it.

“To think what you want to think is to think TRUTH, regardless of appearances. Every man has the natural and inherent power to think what he wants to think, but it requires far more effort to do so than it does to think the thoughts which are suggested by appearances. To think according to appearance is easy; to think truth regardless of appearances is laborious, and requires the expenditure of more power than any other work man is called upon to perform.

There is no labor from which most people shrink as they do from that of sustained and consecutive thought; it is the hardest work in the world. This is especially true when truth is contrary to appearances. Every appearance in the visible world tends to produce a corresponding form in the mind which observes it; and this can only be prevented by holding the thought of the TRUTH.

To look upon the appearance of disease will produce the form of disease in your own mind, and ultimately in your body, unless you hold the thought of the truth, which is that there is no disease; it is only an appearance, and the reality is health.

To look upon the appearances of poverty will produce corresponding forms in your own mind, unless you hold to the truth that there is no poverty; there is only abundance.

To think health when surrounded by the appearances of disease, or to think riches when in the midst of appearances of poverty, requires power; but he who acquires this power becomes a MASTER MIND. He can conquer fate; he can have what he wants.

This power can only be acquired by getting hold of the basic fact which is behind all appearances; and that fact is that there is ONE Thinking Substance, from which and by which all things are made.

Then we must grasp the truth that every thought held in this substance becomes a form, and that man can so impress his thoughts upon it as to cause them to take form and become visible things.” The Science of Getting Rich

[cylon]

Thanks for posting that excerpt, I'm starting to get a better framework now.

[torilink]

you are most welcome.