Given up diets

[nzmegs]

That's it - no more! After years (and I mean close to 20 years) of being on a perpetual diet I have decided enough is enough. In that time I have lost and gained so much weight and yet my weight has on average increased more or less steadily.

I am now slightly cuddly - not hugely overweight - but due to the fact I like to exercise I manage to keep it in check. that being said I am around 20 pounds overweight for my height.

I read something recently which said that according to several studies the most common feature or event in the lives of people who had recently put on weight was the fact they had been on a diet in the last 6 months. Whether they had lost weight on that diet or not.

Not a change of circumstance or stress or illness - they had been on a diet.

Thinking back over my diet life, I have to admit that the times I hit my highest weights were just after I had lost some. Over time it has become a ratcheting effect. Lose some, put on more and repeat until you get kind of fat.

So two weeks ago I put my scales away and decided to just eat what I want when i want. I am already vegetarian - bordering on vegan - so I have a healthy diet, just a big appetite.

I have no idea what I now weigh and I don't want to know. But i feel a sense of calm over by body, I feel much less guilt and I am eating in a reasonable way, rather than in a frenzied way which was common for me in the past. I fully expect i will end up losing weight, but if I don't, I won't know it.

So "boo" to diets. they can all go jump. I am not doing something which takes so much energy and nearly always ends in failure. that just doesn't make sense. Would a business person keep doing something for 20 years which hadn't worked. No- they would have given up long ago. So I give up too!

[firenexx]

I agree. People who need to lose weight should not "go on diets," they should change their diets. "Going on a diet" almost certainly guarantees a rebound, because after you "go on" a diet, you "go off" it.

[Clint Cora]

I don't believe in 'diets' either since they can never be sustained long term. To me, the only way to go is to make permanent lifestyle habit changes which include nutrition and exercise. I've been on my particular journey in this area since about 11 or 12 years of age and I'm still going strong on this course now that I've reached my middle ages (and maintaining a 30 inch waistline).

It's certainly very doable but you have to realize in order to be successful at this, you will be doing what the vast majority of others will not be doing. If you can be okay with that and maintain faith in yourself, you will be able to keep healthy and fit.

[CoolBee]

I felt the same as you many times Nz. I first became 'fat conscious' and tried to diet when I was 8 years old. I'm now 51 and have lost and gained lost and gained all my life.

BUT since April this year, I ditched grains (cereals) 6 days a week, I have lost 46lb in 15 weeks. AND it has been almost painless and I have felt hungry about 3 times exactly. (I also counted calories and did exercise).

After 43 years I have found my key and I can't tell you how happy I am.
Because I haven't struggled at all with this one.

Anyway, I have a major 'stress test' coming up very shortly (called 'staying with the folks' for 2 weeks!) and we will see in a year's time if I have kept it off and I know I will have. Totally different feel this time round.

[Andrew Gubb]

I agree with the sentiment My personal philosophy is to focus on improving health and the weight loss will follow. Well, there could be any number of root causes for overweight, all of which come down to an imbalance of some sort. I don't believe in "dieting" as in doing something different from your normal life; your normal life should bring you to your target weight as an effect of its healthfulness and balance.

[jn15]

Originally Posted by nzmegs

That's it - no more! After years (and I mean close to 20 years) of being on a perpetual diet I have decided enough is enough. In that time I have lost and gained so much weight and yet my weight has on average increased more or less steadily.

I am now slightly cuddly - not hugely overweight - but due to the fact I like to exercise I manage to keep it in check. that being said I am around 20 pounds overweight for my height.

I read something recently which said that according to several studies the most common feature or event in the lives of people who had recently put on weight was the fact they had been on a diet in the last 6 months. Whether they had lost weight on that diet or not.

Not a change of circumstance or stress or illness - they had been on a diet.

Thinking back over my diet life, I have to admit that the times I hit my highest weights were just after I had lost some. Over time it has become a ratcheting effect. Lose some, put on more and repeat until you get kind of fat.

So two weeks ago I put my scales away and decided to just eat what I want when i want. I am already vegetarian - bordering on vegan - so I have a healthy diet, just a big appetite.

I have no idea what I now weigh and I don't want to know. But i feel a sense of calm over by body, I feel much less guilt and I am eating in a reasonable way, rather than in a frenzied way which was common for me in the past. I fully expect i will end up losing weight, but if I don't, I won't know it.

So "boo" to diets. they can all go jump. I am not doing something which takes so much energy and nearly always ends in failure. that just doesn't make sense. Would a business person keep doing something for 20 years which hadn't worked. No- they would have given up long ago. So I give up too!

I think the main thing in any sustainable eating plan is LOTS of fruits and vegetables. No matter what else your diet includes, that should be the central point.

As long as you are hitting that, I don't think what else you consume makes a huge difference. Personally, I'm a vegan and an aspiring raw foodist--I shoot for the ideal (rarely hit it yet).

But I don't think people who eat small amounts of meats or grains are necessarily unhealthy as long as most of their food comes from fruits and veggies. Just my input.

[Dulma]

I don't believe in "dieting" to fix yourself. I do believe in eating in a clean, wholesome way to nourish yourself.

[KtotheB]

Good for you... I don't believe in diets either.

[Michealleo]

Don't feel about it.Follow this tips & site surely you might gain.

Drink lot more water.

Drink Green tea that will help you to reduce weight.

Drink lemon juice with warm water. You can drink this after breakfast, lunch.


Jogging & Swimming is the best way to reduce weight.

Try to involve in a game like tennis, badminton, etc.

[nzmegs]

Thanks for all your replies guys. it is nice to know that other people feel the same as me and have had similar experiences.

I know that not being on a diet actually makes me very different from my friends and family - some of whom I spend much time talking about the latest fad. As long as they can accept that i have had enough and that I am not interested any more, then maybe we can have conversations which no longer revolve around food and dieting.

Today i woke up feeling a little bloated. For the first time i didn't immediately think about moderating my eating to lose the bloat. I thought about what I had eaten the previous day (white bread...) and realsied that it wasn't ideal and made a vow to keep it in check. it was for my health that I came to that conclusion and nothing more.

What a free way to think - especially for those of us who are prone to a little bit of obsession surrounding food.

Also I got to thinking about how i have changed my diet since the begining of the year. I have gone from a meat eater tio a virtual vegan over the last 7 months. If i had approached that as a diet or a way of losing weight i would have certainly fell off the wagon. But becuase it was based around my thoughts on the environment and my health my attitude has been different and I have found it easy to stick to.

Losing weight was never enough of an incentive to make real changes.

Anyway thankls for your input guys. I will let you know how I get on. I can't tell you if i lose wiehgt or gain (that is the opposite of what I am trying to acheive) but i will tell you if my relationship with food and diets has improved.

[nzmegs]

Another week on and i have to admit i am feeling better. this week I decided i needed to stop hiding my eating habits from those i love - my family. In the past i would "pretend" to stick to my diet day in day out and then a couple of times a week I would fall foul of bingeing and end up eating too much sugar - always sugar...

Obviously this meant my diets were always failing and I never knew why. Of course i did, but according to my family I was so "good".

Anyway I have stopped hiding what i eat. If I fancy something sugary - like a dessert. I sit with the family and we eat together. I eat the same as them, I don't have the "diet " version and i am beingvery open about it. I have even set up a bowl of sweets in the living room which asnyone in the family is free to have any time they like.

the result is that I am eat far fewer sweets than I normally would. I pass by that bowl of sweets like it wasn't even there. Like having sweets in the house is a normal and everyday thing. I don't feel deprived becuase I know that I can eat what i like when i like.

However one small problem has emerged. My husband still can't get his head around the fact that I am "supposed" to be losing weight. He can't see how that is possible if i eat what i want. So I still get the sly looks when i tuck into my dessert and he even reads the calorie labels on my behalf to remind me about what I am eating. Trying to explaint to him that i am more likely to acheive that goal if i stop dieting doesn't make sense when i explain it. Any ideas on tackling that one?

[firenexx]

Hmm, maybe you need to explain that to him a little harder. Or maybe he just needs to wait and see the proof. A no-stress approach to eating (and repairing your relationship with food) seems to me like it would work better than a stress-filled dieting obsession, so maybe in a couple months he'll notice. I like the idea about the candy and sweets. Saying no to secret binges is a positive step.

[36burrows]

I also gave up dieting, most of them are just plain crap that don't dig down deep enough into each individuals specific reasons for being overweight.

Most diets are all based on hype its so ridiculous and they never work and are more work than they're worth.

I think you made a great decision in saying enough is enough, I did the same thing and found my own solution that actually worked without having to count calories all day long.

I wish you the best

[joelr]

I have a suspicion that many people who start dieting end up undereating which leads to intense cravings that ends up causing a binge or eating a "cheat meal".
Which then kills motivation and the diet gets dropped for a few days and by the weeks end it ends up being a weight gain week which really kills motivation.

I've had many successful sort of "pre-contest" bodybuilding diets and the focus is as much on eating enough as it is eating really clean and then in the advanced phase dropping carbs really low.
But every day all day the focus is to be well fed in the macro-nutrients (carb, protein, fat) so that the intense cravings never happen. With the exception of carbs, they can be dropped really low BUT you have to make up for it to some extent by getting enough good fat and protein. There is a minium amount your body needs of fat and protein and if you fall under you go into starvation mode.
It's very uncomfortable and no way to live life. It can't be sustained.

Usually when your feeling hungry it's time to eat. Several small meals throughout the day works like magic for thousands of dieters every year.
I don't call it a "diet" but I do say "I'm dieting". Which means I can't veer off the eating plan, if someone says "let's get a pizza" then I say "can't I'm dieting". Generally it only takes a few months and then I can get back to occasionally having a pizza with friends.

It IS a lifestyle change but there are 2 versions of the change - maintaining and cutting fat. If you have to eat sweets try to set aside 1 day per week and try to be active that day, even do some cardio. The change is that you base you meals around good healthy choices and portions that will not cause fat gain. That's it.
Any sweets or junk food is considered a "cheat". If you want to drop weight all you need is to stop with the cheating most days. If your diet is based on good choices then you'll be all set.

Anyway, the point was I think it's important to learn how to keep yourself well fed and to learn to read your bodies hunger signals. That's the best way to find out what you need to eat in terms of protein and fat.

Carbs are harder because most of us crave carbs all the time. So you have to pick a set amount, say 125 gr and break that up into 5 or so meals.
Our bodies tell us to eat carbs until we have overeaten them. So listening to carb cravings isn't helpful.

[nzmegs]

joelr - I get what you are saying - of course you need to eat healthily to ensure you get the right nutrients. reading the signals from your body is a good way to start. But I am really trying to get away from having to count calories, carbs, grams of protein or any of that. Being obsessed is not what i want.

My aim is to eat what my body is telling me it needs. lately that has been fruit, but it could be anything.

I agree that most idets lead to undereating and cannot be maintained. I know i find it impossible. I would have usually felt guilt - stopped eating very much at all, felt hungry for a few days, felt miserable, noticed that my efforts were not giving great results and felt angry at having to do this and then binged to make myself feel better. I am sure this is very familiar to everyone who has to diet for a prolonged period.

I never ever want to say "I am dieting" "I am on a diet" or any variation with the word diet included. except " I am only eating a vegetarian diet" if poeple don't understand that concept.

I also refuse to only give myself one day a week when i can eat sweets and to feel that i must do plenty of exercise on that day to counteract it. Sounds like a diet to me. I just don't want to think about it. Just eat what my body needs - no more no less. More on days i am busy and active and less on days i don't do much. Sweets from time to time if I fancy it.

thanks for the advice re my family. I will just give it time. Byut i certainly am feeling the pressure to DO something - anything to show i am tackling this issue. makes me mad. i am not even all that overweight and have no health issues related to it. Ho Hum.

[joelr]

Originally Posted by nzmegs

joelr - I get what you are saying - of course you need to eat healthily to ensure you get the right nutrients. reading the signals from your body is a good way to start. But I am really trying to get away from having to count calories, carbs, grams of protein or any of that. Being obsessed is not what i want.

My aim is to eat what my body is telling me it needs. lately that has been fruit, but it could be anything.

I sympathize with what you are saying and if you call counting grams "obsessed" then that is certainly your right. I don't believe in counting calories either. I do count grams, I don't find it to be obsessive as it's quite easy and well worth the results.
By monitoring my protein grams I can add muscle to my frame and by counting carbs I can eliminate fat. It's so awesome when the results start happening that it's worth the meager effort, to me anyways.

The thing with listening to our bodies, for me anyway, is that my body wants carbs, simple sugar, and fatty foods. Not because it needs them but because they release natural chemicals that are pleasing. In fact they are natural opiates which are the most pleasing chemicals of all, only released when we fall in love, eat sugar/fat, use opiates, heavy exercise, etc..

Originally Posted by nzmegs

I also refuse to only give myself one day a week when i can eat sweets and to feel that i must do plenty of exercise on that day to counteract it. Sounds like a diet to me. I just don't want to think about it. Just eat what my body needs - no more no less. More on days i am busy and active and less on days i don't do much. Sweets from time to time if I fancy it.

I said that once too so I understand. I found it more important to be able to eat yummy foods as they are almost like drugs, very enjoyable. Eventually I switched to wanting to have a nice physique. Neither goal is better just different. Although I can say it's a considerable amount more satisfying to have an awesome body than to be able to eat sweets anytime. I'm not always in top shape but when I am it's really cool. In many ways.

My ex-wife had the ability to eat what she needed, sometimes sweets, and not work out and maintain her weight. Well, throughout her 20's anyway. After we were married she slowly did gain 30 lbs, but her curves were sexy.
Now at 40 I think she's getting heavier. But the point was she somehow didn't overdo the sweets like I would if I had free reign.
2 1/2 years ago I took 9 months off and ate whatever I felt like, I got chubby fast. It truly sucked, being overweight and hating it really sucks.

So it depends on the person.

If you can say "I'm only eating vegetarian", which is totally a dietary choice or "I'm not eating animals" why not be able to say "I'm not eating sugar"?





thanks for the advice re my family. I will just give it time. Byut i certainly am feeling the pressure to DO something - anything to show i am tackling this issue. makes me mad. i am not even all that overweight and have no health issues related to it. Ho Hum.[/QUOTE]

[nzmegs]

thanks Joe for your wise words. I am still anti diets and still will not weight myself. but i have to realise that i still need to eat in a healthy way. i know what my body needs and what is good for me. Sugar is not one of those things.

I would love to be able to say - I am not eating any more sugar. or me not eating meat was moreo f an ethical or political choice and the fact i didn't like meat much made it easier. i am happy with the alternatives and feel very satisfied. However, the sugar free alternatives aren't really up to much. Fruit just doesn't cut the mustard!

Have had a major flare up at home regarding my inability to stick to a diet...still cannot make it clear that i don't want to diet. i just want to lose that mentality. however I have agreed to exercise more consistently as i know this is a choice for my health. privately, i am trying to cut down on sugar and eat more protein. Still not counting grams though....

[CoolBee]

Here's something you could try which I did for a few months about 3 years ago and which was very useful: Why Am I NOT Eating When I AM Hungry food diary.

Most food diaries focus on 'why am I eating when I am not hungry', I turned this round and decided to focus on 'why am I NOT eating when I AM hungry?'. I decided the only acceptable reasons for this would be medical (eg when you have to have a med test or exam which requires a fasting period before hand) or when you are stuck somewhere unexpectedly and unable to get hold of food - eg a long meeting at work which overruns or a transport breakdown or similar.
Other than that, I chose to 'honour my hunger'. One of the main reasons I quickly found was that I never had anything in the cupboards so I had to start getting more organized with my shopping!

[joelr]

Originally Posted by nzmegs

thanks Joe for your wise words. I am still anti diets and still will not weight myself. but i have to realise that i still need to eat in a healthy way. i know what my body needs and what is good for me. Sugar is not one of those things.

I would love to be able to say - I am not eating any more sugar. or me not eating meat was moreo f an ethical or political choice and the fact i didn't like meat much made it easier. i am happy with the alternatives and feel very satisfied. However, the sugar free alternatives aren't really up to much. Fruit just doesn't cut the mustard!

Have had a major flare up at home regarding my inability to stick to a diet...still cannot make it clear that i don't want to diet. i just want to lose that mentality. however I have agreed to exercise more consistently as i know this is a choice for my health. privately, i am trying to cut down on sugar and eat more protein. Still not counting grams though....

Well if your desire to say "I'm not dieting" is greater than your desire to say "I'm not eating sugar" than that's just how it is. There are no rules as to who has to be in what type of shape. Your family may "want" you to do this or that but ultimately it's your decision.
Assuming you can afford the food and barring any illness or thyroid problem you have the right to eat whatever you like and to have whatever type of physique emerges from that diet.
But that doesn't mean your husband won't have his own reactions for whatever his reasons are. I dunno, that's his thing.

I have found ways to make fruit good though. I know what you mean about fruit not cutting it, I used to think that also. When your body is used to a simple sugar buzz then fructose/fruit sugar sucks.
It takes some adjusting. I make a fruit smoothie every day but I have tricks to make it taste like something loaded with sugar.

For one the protein powder has a type of fake sweetener plus I add some nutra-sweet sugar free fruit punch mix. Those combine with the fruit sugar and it tastes much better than plain fruit.
Like any good thing it takes effort and experimenting. This info might not be useful to you right now but it's an open forum so it's worth mentioning.

I like the quote "nothing tastes better than looking good".

It's true.
Except for Sour Skittles. Those are like crack.

[Footballman]

Hi there,
Just thought I'd throw my two cents in.

I think the diets are not working due to the strategy you are using. I've tried to adopt to a new diet plan(or life change) and it always never seems to work well. What has worked is to make one change at a time. I was hooked on sugary drinks for ages, and I've been able to give them up recently by just focusing on this one adjustment.

So perhaps it's the strategy that is not working. I think our minds and bodies respond better to these incremental changes.

[Sheridan]

You are absolutely right, the reason is that if we use these dieting programs for ling run then there chance to face the problem of the hair fall.

[Sheridan]

Originally Posted by Sheridan

You are absolutely right, the reason is that if we use these dieting programs for ling run then there chance to face the problem of the hair fall.

Any comment?