Vegetarian Thanksgiving :O

[rickrock]

I am the only vegetarian in my family and Thanksgiving dinner is a major component of a happy holiday season. I searched for a thread about this, but couldn't find one, sorry if its preexisting. Meat isn't an uncommon thing in this house, it is used for every meal.

I don't want to mess up Thanksgiving dinner for my family or make it awkward since people are hesitant to eat meat in front of me... I am not a vegetarian because I find it sickening, I don't find the taste of some meats bad and I don't get depressed after eating it (although I can see how I could). It just doesn't feel right for me. I am ready to make a green been casserole and I am excited to try it for the first time but does anyone have any experiences from their first vegetarian Thanksgiving dinner with non-vegetarians?? What did you guys do? What about recipes? Any favorites? I am excited thinking about it !

[votoshka]

Originally Posted by rickrock

I am the only vegetarian in my family and Thanksgiving dinner is a major component of a happy holiday season. I searched for a thread about this, but couldn't find one, sorry if its preexisting. Meat isn't an uncommon thing in this house, it is used for every meal.

I don't want to mess up Thanksgiving dinner for my family or make it awkward since people are hesitant to eat meat in front of me... I am not a vegetarian because I find it sickening, I don't find the taste of some meats bad and I don't get depressed after eating it (although I can see how I could). It just doesn't feel right for me. I am ready to make a green been casserole and I am excited to try it for the first time but does anyone have any experiences from their first vegetarian Thanksgiving dinner with non-vegetarians?? What did you guys do? What about recipes? Any favorites? I am excited thinking about it !

Well first, you have to make it clear that you really don't care that everyone else is eating meat, and not to worry about you because you don't! No one should be made awkward by the veg*an choices of others

Now, I'm not in the US so we don't have Thanksgiving, but in another few weeks I'll be celebrating Christmas for the first time as a vegetarian, so it will be an interesting experience too... especially as I'll be at my in law's house, and they're not going to make anything special for me. Usually when I go to their house I bring vegie burgers to eat lol.

Anyway, I'd be interested in hearing from others in the same situation I don't want to feel too much like the odd one out at Christmas lol!

[aelle]

I heartily recommend you read this article: Social Minefield: How To Properly Feed Your Guests

You don't have to be apologetic about your dietary choices. Unless you're an ass about it, you're not going to ruin the Holidays for anyone but those who are waiting for it to be ruined

The key is preparation. Let your hosts know in advance about your food choices, think beforehand of possible, non agressive answers to the inquisition that may come your way, offer to bring some dishes or help with the preparation... and possibly have a Cliff bar in your purse in case the host messes up despite their best intention and puts gravy on everything. But really, if you let everyone know that you want the whole thing to be handled gracefully, it should be a non issue.

[ginkgo]

It sounds like you are living too much in the future instead of the present. A very famous American psychologist, Abraham Maslow (1908-1970), said "I can feel guilty about the past, apprehensive about the future, but only in the present can I act. The ability to be in the present moment is a major component of mental wellness."

It is in your imagination that people will feel bad eating meat in front of you unless you do something like calliing them animal murderers or bring a live turkey as a pet. Why not just be at Thanksgiving and enjoy and watch what happens. You can only feel enjoyment in the present. Also your only purpose is to be concerned about your own happiness not other people's happiness. Each peson has been given the right to rule their own life and decide what will make them happy.

I hear that diet is a big deal with some families. My advice would be to get a life. An aunt of mine died and my many relatives and I went to the funeral. Afterwards we went to eat at a diner together. We all ordered something different. I had no idea who was eating no meat or not. We did not care about what each of us chose to eat. Our aunt will never eat anything again. I talked a lot to my relatives the whole time but paid no attention to what they ate. Isn't there anything more meaningful to talk about than the food one is eating at the moment?

[MightySunTzu]

Originally Posted by ginkgo

It sounds like you are living too much in the future instead of the present.

Originally Posted by ginkgo

It is in your imagination that people will feel bad eating meat in front of you unless you do something like calliing them animal murderers or bring a live turkey as a pet.

Originally Posted by ginkgo

Also your only purpose is to be concerned about your own happiness not other people's happiness.

Originally Posted by ginkgo

My advice would be to get a life.

Originally Posted by ginkgo

Isn't there anything more meaningful to talk about than the food one is eating at the moment?

Yes there probably is .

[rickrock]

Originally Posted by votoshka

Well first, you have to make it clear that you really don't care that everyone else is eating meat, and not to worry about you because you don't! No one should be made awkward by the veg*an choices of others

Now, I'm not in the US so we don't have Thanksgiving, but in another few weeks I'll be celebrating Christmas for the first time as a vegetarian, so it will be an interesting experience too... especially as I'll be at my in law's house, and they're not going to make anything special for me. Usually when I go to their house I bring vegie burgers to eat lol.

Anyway, I'd be interested in hearing from others in the same situation I don't want to feel too much like the odd one out at Christmas lol!

Great, I'll tell you how it goes

Originally Posted by aelle

I heartily recommend you read this article: Social Minefield: How To Properly Feed Your Guests

You don't have to be apologetic about your dietary choices. Unless you're an ass about it, you're not going to ruin the Holidays for anyone but those who are waiting for it to be ruined

The key is preparation. Let your hosts know in advance about your food choices, think beforehand of possible, non agressive answers to the inquisition that may come your way, offer to bring some dishes or help with the preparation... and possibly have a Cliff bar in your purse

Thank you for the advise, I talked with my mom tonight and told her I would like to cook the things I would like to eat and see if others might like it as well. and I dont have a purse, I am a guy

Originally Posted by ginkgo

It sounds like you are living too much in the future instead of the present. A very famous American psychologist, Abraham Maslow (1908-1970), said "I can feel guilty about the past, apprehensive about the future, but only in the present can I act. The ability to be in the present moment is a major component of mental wellness."

It is in your imagination that people will feel bad eating meat in front of you unless you do something like calliing them animal murderers or bring a live turkey as a pet. Why not just be at Thanksgiving and enjoy and watch what happens. You can only feel enjoyment in the present. Also your only purpose is to be concerned about your own happiness not other people's happiness. Each peson has been given the right to rule their own life and decide what will make them happy.

I hear that diet is a big deal with some families. My advice would be to get a life. An aunt of mine died and my many relatives and I went to the funeral. Afterwards we went to eat at a diner together. We all ordered something different. I had no idea who was eating no meat or not. We did not care about what each of us chose to eat. Our aunt will never eat anything again. I talked a lot to my relatives the whole time but paid no attention to what they ate. Isn't there anything more meaningful to talk about than the food one is eating at the moment?

I do not call them animals and they dont really know why I am a vegetarian. At least not the entire reason. I like the diet because it coexists quite well with my spiritual lifestyle. I wish I did have a pet turkey though, they are beautiful. Thank you for the advice and I will take it to heart.

[rickrock]

Originally Posted by aelle

I heartily recommend you read this article: Social Minefield: How To Properly Feed Your Guests

That was great, and she was pretty funny! Thanks I didnt think about ever going to other peoples homes for thanksgiving :O

[moonrambler]

I don't get why people are hesitant to eat meat in front of you. I don't think I've ever experienced that

When I quit eating meat, it was right before Thanksgiving, and my mom was flipped out that it would hurt my grandma's feelings if I didn't eat turkey, but I don't think my grandma cared at all. She thought I was silly I wasn't very concerned in the first place because to me it seemed like only the 'main course' at Thanksgiving dinner is meat . . . . everything else is vegetables, fruit and dessert.

It's the same wherever I've been for Thanksgiving. Turkey is the centerpiece, but there's potatoes, squash, sweet potatoes, cranberries, green bean casserole, carrots & cauliflower with toasted/buttered bread crumbs, dinner rolls . . . I can bring vegetarian 'stuffing' . . . pumpkin pie, apple pie . . . A couple times I've made a seitan 'turkey' with vegetarian gravy.

[moonrambler]

Originally Posted by ginkgo

Afterwards we went to eat at a diner together. We all ordered something different. I had no idea who was eating no meat or not. We did not care about what each of us chose to eat. Our aunt will never eat anything again. I talked a lot to my relatives the whole time but paid no attention to what they ate. Isn't there anything more meaningful to talk about than the food one is eating at the moment?

I've discovered that most of the time, in a group situation with a buffet or potluck type of meal, I can bypass the meat and nobody notices or if they do notice, they don't care. Your mentioning of a funeral reminded me of when I was first catching on to the idea that I don't necessarily have to mention my eating preferences. After a funeral once, somebody handed me the plate with lunch meat for the second time and said, "Don't you want any meat?" and I just said, "No thank you," and that was the end of the discussion. I thought, wow, that was easy! I've come to realize I don't have to say, "No thank you, I don't eat meat."

[MightySunTzu]

Originally Posted by moonrambler

I've discovered that most of the time, in a group situation with a buffet or potluck type of meal, I can bypass the meat and nobody notices or if they do notice, they don't care. Your mentioning of a funeral reminded me of when I was first catching on to the idea that I don't necessarily have to mention my eating preferences. After a funeral once, somebody handed me the plate with lunch meat for the second time and said, "Don't you want any meat?" and I just said, "No thank you," and that was the end of the discussion. I thought, wow, that was easy! I've come to realize I don't have to say, "No thank you, I don't eat meat."

Yes, these are very good points and i also liked what votashka and aelle had to say. It's interesting how effective "No thank you" can be with no further explanation... and for somebody to notice that there's no meat on your plate among 14 other items would take a pretty keen eye and/or entirely too much time on their hands. I think it's when people already know you are veg*n and want to make an issue out of it that the conflicts can potentially arise.

@ Ginkgo, i might have misinterpreted, but your reply came across... to me at least... as inappropriately hostile towards rickrock. Get a life?... Really?

[rickrock]

Originally Posted by MightySunTzu

@ Ginkgo, i might have misinterpreted, but your reply came across... to me at least... as inappropriately hostile towards rickrock. Get a life?... Really?

He just has a different style of communication it seems. He did make valid points. However, he might have forgotten that it takes more than one person to have a conversation and maybe thinks that I am just trying to start something with other people over my chosen diet. I dont know, he didn't really specify