The wardrobe experiment (weight loss)

[dalante]

2 days ago and yesterday, I posted on this forum about weight loss. I was following up on steve's podcast "faster goal achievement," in which he said that in order to achieve your goals faster, you can help yourself by already implementing a side effect of your goal in your life. For example, since he's set a goal to be a millionaire, he started to carry a bigger amount of cash (like millionaires would probably do) and that helped him get into the millionaire mentality.

I started thinking about how the life of a thin person is and I had an idea, which I posted on this forum, expecting to trigger hundreds of replies of thank yous and bravos. The reality didn't meet 1% of this expectation; I realized I wasn't convincing enough.

My idea is that thin people wear clothes that fit thin people.

For my height and body composure, if I was at my ideal weight, I would be a medium. I've lost some weight in the past few years, so I can comfortably wear Large clothes. But in my wardrobe, there are still some XL shirts, from my fatter days, and this is what I find incongruent with weight loss. And if I loose more weight, the L shirts will be incongruent as well. Moreover, if I loose more weight, I won't be able to dress myself, since I only have a couple of medium shirts. Therefore, I need to adjust my wardrobe.

My first objective is to donate to charity all my XL clothes, to take them out of my wardrobe.

My second idea is to fill my wardrobe with shirts and trousers of my ideal size (but also keep the ones that fit me right now).

The reason why I am so convinced about my idea, is that it triggered a "vision" in me, i.e. a short flash in my mind of what I would look like when I'm thin. This has never happened to me before.

Over the past couple days, I have been wearing my two medium shirts and since they are just a little too tight, that got me thinking: wow, I still have some way to go to look good in this shirt. I have also tried to put on smaller trousers and I couldn 't get into them.

Wearing those medium shirts made me realize that thin people don't settle with being overweight. If a thin person put on 2 kilos, he immediately thinks: wow, I gotta do something about it... that is probably because they can fel it when the belt or the shirt is too tight. Years ago, I was 40 kilos overweight... Now, I am "only" 15 kilos overweight... so I settled with that, since I already lost 25. Wearing a medium shirt made me realize: you can't stop there, you are still overweight.

Whereas, when I wear my L shirts, my body feels pretty satisfied and, if intellectually I know I should loose more weight, I don't feel like it.

Much like Steve's experiment made him think: 17,000$ is actually not that big, my two day trial made me think: 15 kilos is still a lot!!

This week end, when I have some time, I will implement my changes and follow up with this experiment here. Note that this experiment still requires dieting and exercizing... but I claim that the wardrobe experiment will give the motivation to do those two things.

So I will keep you posted, and I hope some people will join, whatever your current size and your dream size are.

[TheHulaQueen]

WOW! What an amazing realization. That's going to have a huge effect on your image of yourself and where you are meant to be.

Once I had a pair of favourite soft stretch pants. I wore them often. Then one day I went to put on a more fitted pair of pants and they didn't fit! OUCH! This is like the opposite.. sort of saying... "Look this doens't fit.. you must change now". Great!

[Carved_Insane]

mental manipulation/transmutation.

Have you ever read any books concerning you sub-concious mind? If not, i'd suggest Think and Grow Rich by Napolean Hill, my favorite. There are, and i've read, many others. My suggestion is based on the authors ability to make it easy to read, understand, and appreciate.If you go ahead, and don't understand, i am more than willing to help you with the material. In fact I would take pleasure in discussing it with you.

I think this applies beautifully. 'Act as though'. Get into the mindset and things will fall in place. The best example i can think of: act like girls need to work for you, and they will. Most readily available example. Spend one night pretending girls are lucky to talk to you, they will act accordingly.

Weight loss. Simple. Take an educated approach, think accordingly, and change your lifestyle. If you can't lose wieght its because you decided not to. Also, the mechanics are simple. I never said easy, i said simple. Again, questions, more than willing.

[elainevdw]

Originally Posted by dalante

Wearing those medium shirts made me realize that thin people don't settle with being overweight. If a thin person put on 2 kilos, he immediately thinks: wow, I gotta do something about it... that is probably because they can feel it when the belt or the shirt is too tight. Years ago, I was 40 kilos overweight... Now, I am "only" 15 kilos overweight... so I settled with that, since I already lost 25. Wearing a medium shirt made me realize: you can't stop there, you are still overweight.

Whereas, when I wear my L shirts, my body feels pretty satisfied and, if intellectually I know I should loose more weight, I don't feel like it.

I've always said that dieting and budgeting go hand in hand.

One reason I'm dieting right now is my favorite pair of pants got a hole in the crotch. Then I put on my other favorite pair of jeans, which I hadn't worn for 6 months, and OUCH! I could barely button them, and it was really uncomfortable! Yet, I refuse to go out and buy new jeans on the credit card I'm trying to pay off. So in order to have pants that fit, I have to lose a few.

Another budgeting tie-in: eating less costs less.

But, back to clothes. I think that getting rid of larger clothes in your wardrobe also takes the safety net away. You suddenly realize that if you relapse, you'll go naked. If you go naked, your boss will fire you. If you lose your job, you'll be forced to run naked in the forest fending eating grubs and berries... So it's not an option, until grubs and berries become the next diet fad.

Having some attractive clothes half a size down from where you currently are is a big motivator, too, because it would be so extremely satisfying to put those suckers on and have a little room to spare some day.

Good luck, and I hope this strategy works out well for you!

[dalante]

It seems that the universe has responded quite positively to my experiment and my desire to loose weight... I have already lost a couple of kgs, which is a good encouragement. More importantly, I was at my girlfriend this week end, and she randomly pulled a book out her bookshelf, that is called "You are what you eat."

I found it quite informative and definitelty gave me a new perspective on nutruition and dieting. It made me understand why I seemed to have achy joints when I diet, and also how certain food choices could help me diet.

So far, when I am queuing to buy food and I have to make choices, the picture of my wardrobe come to my mind and remind me: "you're not there yet." So I've found it easier to make healthy choices.

[Dharma]

Just want to add, for us USA folks: 1 kilo = ~2.2 pounds.

[dalante]

Last week end, as I said, I went to shop some medium sized shirts, so now I have a week worth of clothes of a size I would like to wear when I am thin.

I am applying the principles of Gillian MacKeith in my diet, and I enjoy dieting. What I like the most at the moment is the discovery of all sorts of foods that I am not used to buy and eat, such as nuts, seeds, variety of fruits and veggies, soy milk, etc. Food combining is also very new to me and I am enjoying a better digestion. This morning, I had a bowl of All bran flakes with soy milk, for lunch, a brazil nuts salad (comprised of lettuce, mushrooms and cucumber), then a snack made of raw broccoli, raw califlower (not really good for the breath, I don 't know if I'll do it again) and a light yogurt.

Did about 30 minutes of exercizing, then had a dinner made of small portions of avocado, onion, garlic, chicken, beetroot, mange touts and cottage cheese... Mmm

I am sometimes too impatient to fit into the clothes of my new wardrobe and I wish it wouldn't take so long (mind you, it has not been a week yet)...

The weird thing with this experiment is that when I had the wardrobe idea, it was so revolutionary to me that I don't understand why people don't see that having a wardrobe with smaller sized clothes is the most simple and obvious side-effect of loosing weight... but hey, maybe the idea needs a little time to sink in.

[C33]

I am trying this!

So yesterday I bought new,tighter fitting clothes, and tomorrow I am throwing away the "fat" ones.

Thanks for the inspiration!

[dalante]

Yes!
Finally someone jumped in! It's great because I am no longer alone in this adventure!

C33, just as a reminder, I bought fitter clothes, tossed the ones that are too large for me, but kept the ones that fit me just... although now I try to only wearing the fitter ones.

You can't believe how great it is to know that you're in this. Today I was thinking, while looking at myself: "wow I still have a long way to go." I kept the motivation telling myself that I can't expect a major change to happen overnight, that I have to be patient. The feeling of not being alone definitely is inspiring.

So here is what I did today: I was good on the diet, still following the principles of Dr McKeith. They are quite easy to grasp for a nutrition beginner. I discovered Akuri beans and cooked some for tonight... very good! Not so keen on the flax oil, though For those who live in London, I have discovered a fantastic organic food store, located in 200 Kentish Town road (it's called Earth Natural Food), and it's quite cheap if you compare to healthy food prices in the City. It was recommended by my flatmate.

Exercizewise, went to the gym for an hour, did some running, rowing, abs and press... I find it difficult to remain focused while exercizing, my mind always ends up drifting off to weird places... maybe because the exercize itself is still too hard and my brain makes me forget the pain-

I still can't get into the fitter pants, but it looks like i have 1-1,5 inches to loose, so that will take time. To compensate, I tighten my belt more. And I am wearing the fitter shirts all the time now.

[Mark Lapierre]

Hmmm, I'm kinda doing the same as you, with the opposite intention. I.e., I'm wearing bigger pants and noticing how much room to move there is, and how tight my belt still has too be as I try to put on weight.

It was a confusing feeling to put on a pair of pants I just bought about a year ago and find that they're too tight to wear comfortably. I really liked those pants so I felt simultaneously good that I was obviously putting on weight, and bad because I could no longer wear them.

Keep up the good work

[elainevdw]

Way to go, Dalante!

I thought about this the other night. My only pair of winter workout pants suddenly got really tight on me a few months ago -- talk about love handles! Then last night, I put them on so I could go out for my run ... and the love handles were nearly gone!

This morning, I optimistically tried on some corduroys that I haven't quite comfortably fit in for a month or two, but they still gave me too much of a squeeze.

Keep wearing those fitted shirts! Guys look great in fitted shirts, but even skinny ones like wearing uber-baggy everything, sometimes.

[dalante]

Still happily dieting with my new approach to choosing food.

This morning, I was really frustrated by work, and I went for an errand. On the way, I felt like eating something junkie: one of those Nutella crepes, or a bag of crisps, or an ice cream, then thought to myself: is it really how a thin person thinks? A thin person doesn't rely on food to tame his emotions. just thought I would share this with you...

[C33]

I have started to eat heathy food and am about to change my physique forever! ( I hope so!)

Getting rid of my "fat" clothes really helped. And buying new ones make me want to deserve them, as it is an investment in my new you.

Will be in London in June, so will definitely check out that store!

By then I will 3 sizes smaller at least!

[dalante]

When I mentioned the wardorbe idea, Steve said it could backfire at me. It could if I hadn't reached a certain stage. Let me explain: when you wear clothes that are just a little small for you, looking in the mirror reminds you that you are overweight. When you are in this situation,you have two options:

1) either you go on a self loathing path and say to yourself: "I am fat" and hate yourself, which leads to you being more stressed and more proned to eat compulsively. (This is probably the backfire that Steve talked about.)

2) either you look at yourself objectively and tell yourself: "well, my previous choices put me in that position, but I am doing something about it" then visualize mentally the thin picture of yourself- and be happy that you are getting there.

I go for option number 2! I do not mind being reminded that I am overweight. That is the whole point of this experiment. Before the wardrobe experiment, I was too complacent with myself. Now, I am tough with myself, however, I still like myself, my body and what I am doing. It is quite a new sensation.

How are you getting on C33? How about the others? Is anybody else trying this?

[dalante]

Since the beginning of this experiment, I have lost 4 kilos, i.e. 9 pounds in 10 days... and I am taking it slowly

There is no miracle. Diet and exercize. My future wardrobe is my inspiration.

[ChefSalad]

This definitely helps. I bought a new belt last night, as sort of a trial. It's longest notch is a notch below the notch I was using on my previous belt (on which I had to make 3 extra notches as I lost weight). I intend to buy an even smaller belt not too long from now. With next weeks paycheck, I'm going to get some smaller pants rather than continue to rely on my belt to hold up my fat pants.

I never did bother buying any bigger shirts for when I got really fat anyway (330 at one point, now 300; still pretty hefty, but 2X (Long) is an acceptably good size whereas at 330, 3X would have been better.). I think that not having those bigger shirts is a good thing, since I was already living part of my goals. Considering that the tightest part of those 2X shirts right now is arm length, I think 2X is probably what I'll be wearing when I hit my goal weight anyway (which should be somewhere around 220. I'm not going for a specific weight but rather a look. This look (the look of big, toned muscles) will most certainly result in a higher than average body weight. According to the people at the Y, I have about 180 lbs of lean in my body right now, and I don't intend on loosing any, so 220 (a gain of 20 lbs of muscle and a total of 10% body fat) seems reasonable.).

[C33]

I am happy to see all this positive change for everyone!

Let's keep it up!

I haven t lost any weight to my knowledge,because I am not weighing myself, I eat healthy food every day, except tonight: I had a pastry and dinner at my friends was not the lightest, tomorrow, I am back to eating much much less!

I am wearing my new tighter fitting clothes, and , even if I feel self conscious to have curve hugging clothes on ( and those are not nice curves!), it gives me self confidence to not hide behind my clothes.

This is the only area of life when being a loser is a good thing!!!!!

So, let' s be the biggest (weight) losers!

[dalante]

C33, regarding your eating a pastry, i wouldn't worry as one pastry will not undermine your loss. However, I am not eating pastry at the moment for several reasons. First, pastry is usually made of processed white flour, which is, according to what I am reading, not so good for you. Second, it is not obviously not ideal for weight loss. Finally, because I can get what's in a pastry from other ingredients. For example:
* Flour. My body needs some carbs, and I am getting them from unrefined grains such as quinoa or brown rice.
* Sugar. who doesn't enjoy or need sugar. I get is from natural sweeteners such as honey.
* Fruits (in the case of a blue berry muffin): I eat organic fruits.

So I find that by being educated about a diet, I get what my body needs and I do not have craving for pastry, or a kebab, or French fries, etc. I am getting my good fats, my good carbs and my good sugars. The only cravings I am getting are emotional ones that derive from old habits. Having a balanced diet enabled me to isolate them from my real body cravings and I find it very empowering. Now I am able to tell myself: do I feel like eating because I am hungry or because I am stressed, bored, anxious. If it is option No 1, I feel it in the stomach, and I eat something. If it is option No 2, then I try to solve the problem by adressing it, not by eating

On an unrelated topic, these days I am reading "NLP: The new science of achievement" when I'm on the train, and there is one section about motivation. It talks about motivation "towards" and motivation "away from." In the wardrobe experiment, my motivation is definitely "towards" a thin image of myself that I created, and i find it very powerful... more powerful than "I have to lose weight, I don't want to be fat". These last statements are true as well, but I'd rather focus on "I want to be thin" and the type of clothes I'll be wearing, the type of body I will have... it is much easier.

[C33]

The pastry was 50 per cent emotional eating and 50 per cent real hunger.

Went back to eating healthily today. I craved a sugar fix, 2 boulangeries (bakeries) were on my path, I thought really, really hard about getting a pastry ( I will take Chromium again for sugar cravings). Instead, I went into a cafe and had café au lait, without sugar and the peanut covered chocolate that was served with the coffee. That's it!

I am very proud of myself.

I am knowledgeable about nutrition, that's not the problem there, but I do have cravings, and they are not easy to defeat. Yesterday, was a not-so-good day,but then I met up with my friends, we had a nice dinner and nice wine ( my other weakness) and I felt better. For some reason, I woke up feeling lighter today! It looks like I am losing weight. I had a up-hill walk and it was my work out for today.( 20 minutes mostly going up and 20 going down). I decided that I was going up-hill in more than one way today, I passed 2 bus stops on my way up and, even though I was tired, decided to not indulge in taking the bus!

There is a special event I am going to attend on June 5 and I am envisioning the perfect dress for it. That's my motivation.

NLP sounds great, I have 2 NLP books and intend on reading them, and read anything that can help me control my mind and direct its power towards health and success!

Once I find the dress, I will hang it in my room for motivation.

[dalante]

Since I have started to read the NLP book, I have used some of the techniques in my weightloss experiment, especially the visualization techniques.

As I explained earlier, I made a mental picture of myself as healthy, and smaller clothes really helped me, because I thought: what would I look like when I get into these clothes?

But the novelty for me it to use visualization before I start to exercize (and also while I exercize). For example, before going on the rowing machine, I think: how would a thinner me exercize on that machine? What would be his body posture? How would he place his shoulders, his back, etc? Same with running. How would a healthy person run? He would probably put a lot of energy into it. And I imagine myself doing it.

Then I start exercizing, and I try to focus as much as possible on that image. I imagine that there is a camera looking at me, and the weird thing is that I naturally start behaving like in my mental film, and the exercizing is more effective (I could tell by the sweating) and more enjoyable (I didn't say easy )

I caught myself thinking: "That thin person is not you." And my criticizing self is absolutely right. This is not me... yet. I have started to see my thin self as a character I am playing. I am just an actor who learns how to act the part... and the more I do it, the more I am becoming that part... My motivation is that I will see the day when I am totally this person I am imagining.

By the way, good job C33 for keeping it up!

[dalante]

This week end, I was starting to get comfy in my trousers. They became a little baggy and I actually started to feel that I was thin... but if I look at the scale, I have a bit more than 10 kilos to reach my ideal weight.

What is happening? My trousers are becoming too big! So today, I tried my tighter jeans and I got in them! Not only did I get in them, I was also able to button them! Yippee...

BUT now, I feel my extra weight again, so the journey is far from over.

[Ed O]

Congratulations - a major milestone!

Quote:"My trousers are becoming too big! So today, I tried my tighter jeans and I got in them!"

Earlier Quote: "is it really how a thin person thinks?"

Yes indeed - this is EXACTLY how a thin person thinks.

WAY TO GO

Ed O

The Miracle Log - www.TheMiracleLog.com - A New Positive Inspiration Every Day

[dalante]

I was feeling discouraged yesterday at the gym. I didn't overeat during the day, and I still went to the gym; but for some reason, it was hard to visualize myself as healthy yesterday... I couldn't think like a healthy person and felt like moaning about my exercizes. I guess the quest is not easy everyday.

still managed to loose a pound, though , so that put me in the good mood for today.

[C33]

Congrats on the weight loss!

I guess even healthy, athletic people have their good and bad days at the gym too!

The main thing to focus on is that you are succeeding at reaching your goal!

Way to go!

[apt94jesse@gmail.com]

I know the feeling of accomplishment when it comes to weight loss. I, myself, have lost around 40lbs in the past, and unfortunately, need to do so again. And although I don't put much stock in "New Years' Resolutions," I've been doing very good with my diet and exercise since January first.

Question: Do you think that using an external goal such as wardrobe is healthy being your main motivational tool? I read this whole thread and it seems that health has rarely entered in as a reason for this life change. I don't want to be negative, rather I submit that health as a deeper motivational tool may help you get through days where wardrobe alone isn't enough to carry you through.

It is possible, however, that wardrobe is just a more immediately visible yardstick for your progress on making yourself healthy. This is more realistic. The same tactic is evident for people who get obsessed with the number of pounds (or kilos) they weigh.

For example, I used to keep a weight loss journal. Every morning I would wiegh myself and record the weight. I would also weigh myself throughout the day, and record the "lowest" weight in another column. This way I had a daily log, and an "all time low" record, which was something to strive for, getting my daily low lower than my all time low.

The problem with this scenario is that it is easy to be discouraged. Say I had a great day dieting and exercising, but I gained a half a pound. That's discouraging! You never know what your body is doing. Maybe I'm fighting a cold and retaining extra water, therefor I'm heavier.

I feel like I've gotten a little off topic, but I guess my point is: Don't let a day or two discourage your efforts. The closer you get to your goal, the slower the progress will come, and the less noticable it will be.

So congrats on the progress so far and the progress to come.

Oh, and to comment on your question about why many people are not using this method to lose weight...

It takes commitment. So many people are afraid of failing, that they are not willing to throw away their bigger clothes. What if they can't lose weight? Worse, what if they GAIN weight? Then they have to buy ANOTHER wardrobe.

By committing to get rid of your larger clothes, you have eliminated failure as an option.

It's pretty amazing how much we can all learn from analyzing decisions that seem simple on the surface

Keep up the good work!

-Jesse

[dalante]

I was intending to just write a post, but when I see Jesse's post, I feel I need to reply first!

So to answer your question, Jesse, yes! Health is a higher goal. And it is my overall goal that dominates this adventure. That itself is included into my main goal to become a fiction writer. I have been waking up in the morning between 4 and 5 in order to write every day and I thought: I want to be healthy to be able to rise early and be alert when I write. So health has always been my goal... maybe I should have specified it.

The wardrobe thing came to me after Steve's experiment of carrying a larger amount of cash to enter the millionaire mentality. Putting smaller clothes in my wardrobe was one side effect I could instantly input in my life. It just required me to buy a few t shirts, one pair of pants, and dig out one pair of pants that didn't fit me (which I am wearing today )

When I stood in front of those trousers and thought "I intend to get into those trousers", suddenly, a lot of things changed: I visualized myself as healthy, I suddenly took interest in nutruition, and I put as much energy as I can in the workout. 3 things that never happened to me before. I have noticed tha it is easier to become healthy completely than just doing it half way. By eating healthily and exercysing, my mental strength is better, i no longer have cravings, and I am able to refrain from emotional eating. For example, when I said I felt discouraged a couple of days ago, I didn't go to the fridge and eat to ease my frustration. That is what I used to do, but now, I try to look at the problems in the face and address them.

The wardrobe is an external help. When I looked at a smaller t shirt and thought: if I was healthy I would get in it, it finally hit me. I understood what I had to do to be healthy.

***

That being said... I cheated a bit, i.e. I bought new clothes, but actually did not get rid of the fatter clothes until last night. And believe me, it was scary to do it.

First of all, as you say, by doing so, I eliminated the chance of failure for good. Now, I can not go fatter, otherwise I won't have clothes.

Second, some of those clothes were expensive, or I liked their design, and it was difficult to part with them.

Finally, I experienced a lot of guilt towards my parents, because they bought me a lot of these clothes, and I am afraid of their reactions... I actually haven't told them I gave away my expensive suit I got for my 20th birthday. The thing is, this suit is way too large (that was 7 years ago, and I was even heavier than at the start of this experiment)... It was definitely not easy to part from it. I told myself I could cope with their reactions (I am glad they're in France, and me in England), and also that seeing their son healthy will probably please them more than knowing a suit was given to charity.

[dalante]

Hey,

I haven't written in a week, purely because my weight has stagnated for the past week. After loosing 16 pounds in one month, i have been stagnating for the past week, even though I have maintained healthy eating habits.

At the beginning of the experiment, i was 18 kg (40 pounds) over my desired weight. If you do the maths, I still have 11kg (24 pounds) to go.

This makes me think: I am still behaving like someone who is 11kg overweight. What could be the reasons?

First, the exercize. I only exercize once or twice a week. Not because I don't want to, but because I never seem to find the time to.
Second, my natural metabolism: maybe it is still too low and I am not walking and moving energitically enough. humm...
Third, now that I can get into the clothes I bought, maybe I am meant to wear even smaller clothes!!? Why not?
Fourth, I am eating at regular hours, even if I am not hungry, so I wonder if healthy people only eat when they are hungry, or if they eat according to a schedule.

If you have any thoughts on the question, please share. What do people do with their healthy body?
Your devoted weight-looser,

Dalante

[coleflowers]

The wardrobe experiment has inspired me and helped me on my path to weight loss, so I though I would offer some suggestions based on things that have helped me lose weight. I have lost 21 pounds over the past 3 months and still have 20 pounds to go. I found that by adopting the wardrobe experiment I have become more aware of my body. It's easy to become disconnected from your actual body size when your clothes are baggy and not form fitting. Wearing smaller clothes has led me to notice what my size REALLY is, not what I imagine it to be. Anyway, some suggestions: If you have found that your weight loss has stalled I highly recommend you read the Cortisol Connection by Shawn M. Talbot. My weight loss stopped despite my best efforts, but I read this book and started following its plan and my weight loss has picked up again. The book suggests a lot of supplements, but I haven't used them yet, and still I have seen results.
Also, when you mentioned you were having a work out day where you couldn't see yourself as healthy-that is a normal feeling for even the healthiest, thin, active people out there. I used to work out twice a day every day before I got pregnant (hence the weight gain) and I would have days like that, so don't be too hard on yourself.
Hope this helps! Congratulations on your success so far!

[dalante]

Thanks for the tip. I'be looked the book up on Amazon and will purchase it. Perfect timing because I was telling myself it is time to get more health education

[Lauxa]

I usually don't worry about my weight too much, but if the pounds start to creep on then I get obsessive. I will just not be hungry for a couple of days or too busy to eat much and my portion sizes go way down. I start thinking about what my next diet will be and planning in detail all the healthy food I will be eating and spend a bit of time researching recipes, shopping, cleaning out the fridge and pantry, etc. Also I start to look for opportunities to add a little exercise. And I weigh myself about every day at normal weight, but sometimes several times a day when the numbers creep up a bit. Sometimes when I am debating whether to eat something or not I will think "If the number on the scale is under X, then I will eat it."

Good luck dalante! Just being mindful is the biggest challenge.

Also, before buying a book on Amazon I always read all the 1 and 2 star reviews so I can see what the biggest complaints are.