What is happening to me!
 

Hi everyone, I think I need a little bit of support, until 10 years ago my life was plodding along, I saw the world pretty much as it presented itself. I had the odd thought here and there i.e (why am I here? and whats it all about?) but nothing that rocked my sense of reality. Then one day I found a book in a house that I had recently bought. I have no idea where it came, but assumed it must have been left by the previous occupants. I read it a couple of times before I could make any sense of it. The book was by Deepak Chopra. Well you know how it is, I started reading more and more stuff on spiritual matters, i.e. Buddhism, Hinduism, Christianity and with my very limited knowledge, articles on quantum physics and other scientific stuff. One of the early books being Bruce Lipton's Biology of Belief which is fascinating by the way. Anyway the problem is, if you could call it a problem, I am beginning to feel a bit like a stranger in the world I live in. I am seeing the world so differently than many of the people around me, that it's getting a little isolating. Many conversations I might have had and many things I once liked to do, now seem meaningless. The question I ask myself is? am I feeling like this as part of a growing process or am I just getting depressed? Sometimes I feel a great sense of peace, but other times I feel such despair?

It sounds to me as though you have moved forward in your thinking, but at the same time, you haven't found a way to move forward in your living. You should put yourself out there, challenge yourself to meet new people who might be more on your wavelength, people who may not belong in your current circle of friends. Go out and find a hobby or project or activity that will allow you to do something that has meaning to you. If you feel that you aren't physically able to do something with meaning yet, take a class, or course and learn how.

Sometimes when we upgrade our minds, our current circles seem to be on a lower level. This doesn't mean you have to cut them off, but it does mean that you need to find new things to feel stimulated.

Good luck,
Rivka

Hi! I'm new here, but I just wanted you to know that I really relate to how you feel. I've sort of felt that way on and off my whole life, actually, because I've always been asking those kinds of questions (I was raised in a home with a lot of chaos, and it was develop awful habits or find some meaning and survive -- I chose to find meaning).

Anyway, as I've grown older and matured in my thinking a bit, I've realize that many of the people I had surrounded myself with were not the right people for me any more. I've heard wise people say that sometimes we outgrow friendships, and maybe this is what's happening to you. You've come into a new way of thinking about the world, and now you need to meet other people who are on the same page.

It gets lonely when you do not have a place to express yourself, or someone to hear your, or someone to see the world at the same depth. So yes! I'd say you need a little support. And I think the more you learn about yourself and what makes sense to you, the more confidence you'll have to go out into the world and find like-minded people, or at least people who are on the path.

I really should clarify what I mean by like-minded people. I don't mean that you should find someone who thinks exactly like you, but rather, people with similar values and goals. I.E., people who value personal growth. For me to call someone a close friend now, they must be self-aware. So I seek out people who are. I find many of them online, but also find them in meet-ups and community activities centered around my recreational interests and spiritual beliefs.

It's normal to feel like an alien for a bit, but there ARE other people out there who can and WILL see you and see what you see, and eventually you will find them. HUGS!

Serves you right in my opinion. You've got what I call an "urban neurosis". I remember a parable i read once. An old master and his apprentice were talking, and eating watermelon. The old master asks: So is the watermelon good. The young apprentice says: Yes it is, but I can't figure out whether the taste of the watermelon is in my mouth or in the watermelon itself. And the old master says: You fool, why do you care? The watermelon is good. That's enough.
I hope you catch my drift.