Heyyy guys

[Graves]

Alright, well I'm a young girl from California and I just found out about this website a few hours ago, and I had started writing this thing as soon as I signed up but my power went out, haha.

The reason I signed up for this though, is because I've been having a very troubled night, and I haven't been able to fall asleep, and I feel terrible admitting this because its so shallow, but my sleepless night has been due to physical insecurities that have been eating me up for quite sometime now. Insecurities, that I honestly think have gotten in the way of everything thats ever crossed my path.
The thing is though, that I feel conflicted because I know that I'm better than to feel burdened by physical characteristics I dont like, but I can't help the way I feel or see myself, and thats what REALLY bothers me.
I'm starting to get older and things are starting to change, and I've noticed that I have a lot of growing up to do, but I feel more lost then ever.
This seems like a nice website with nice people and I'm hoping that somehow I'll be able to benefit from this.

[Dan.Linehan]

Hey Graves, thanks for joining! Your early twenties can be a bit rough - finding your passions and place in society isn't always easy. Just be glad you are doing it now, and not in your thirites or forties!

If you keep turning towards what you love you'll be fine -- that would be my advice. What makes you feel the healthiest and most alive and energetic in life?

[Graves]

I'm actually only 17, although it really doesn't feel like it at all.
I guess, I really like to write and read and be out and about walking from place to place, but theres no where to go in this ridiculously small town we've moved to about 3 years ago. I think this move is one of the biggest contributions to my depression. I feel trapped, and I feel as if this town has sucked all the life out of me and it makes me feel helpless. Recently I took California's High School Proficiency Exam, so I can leave and get a jump start in college and life in general, but I feel overwhelmed and intimidated by how unstable things are. It makes me feel like I'm never going to amount to anything in life and just completely fail.

[Dan.Linehan]

Well yeah, you'll fail a lot, we all do. But life just goes on anyway. So don't let failing discourage you, that's how we all learn.

What do you want to fail at first?

[jenlili]

Hello Graves,
I remember that feeling all so well...being trapped. I grew up in rural Pennsylvania, surrounded by relatives and trees and it was beautiful (so was I but I didn't know it). Tiny little high school that couldn't educate the gifted students...but we didn't have the internet and we knew so little compared to teens (and parents) today. My whole goal in life those days was to get the heck out of Brady's Bend. I figured I'd figure out what to do next once I got away. I'm still working on that...guess that's what I'm doing at PDSM. I encourage you to focus on your mind and health and not your appearance. And trust in your future...you've got a good brain in your head girl!

[Graves]

That actually makes me feel so much better. Its encouraging to hear something positive come out of a negative situation, or just to simply realize that life does go on.

Thank you, take care and I wish you the best of luck with school.

[BenThere]

Hi Graves,

My last year of high school, I took some community college classes. It felt good to know I was that much closer to on my own way.

I have a question that I imagine might help clarify your situation.

How much of your discomfort is really about you... and how much is about feeling stuck or overwhelmed by college, the small town, uncertainty about how life works, etc.?

If you were already in a place that inspired you, confidently doing something that mattered with people who cared... would you still feel insecure about your own personal characteristics?

In other words, how much of your restlessness is about you, and how much is about your situation?

[txjarhead]

Originally Posted by Graves

Alright, well I'm a young girl from California and I just found out about this website a few hours ago, and I had started writing this thing as soon as I signed up but my power went out, haha.

The reason I signed up for this though, is because I've been having a very troubled night, and I haven't been able to fall asleep, and I feel terrible admitting this because its so shallow, but my sleepless night has been due to physical insecurities that have been eating me up for quite sometime now. Insecurities, that I honestly think have gotten in the way of everything thats ever crossed my path.
The thing is though, that I feel conflicted because I know that I'm better than to feel burdened by physical characteristics I dont like, but I can't help the way I feel or see myself, and thats what REALLY bothers me.
I'm starting to get older and things are starting to change, and I've noticed that I have a lot of growing up to do, but I feel more lost then ever.
This seems like a nice website with nice people and I'm hoping that somehow I'll be able to benefit from this.

I remember being 17. I pursued the same path as you. I graduated early because I felt that I didn't fit in. I always had older friends and my senior year my older friends were all off at college.

I took the equivalency exam and finished high school, moved to Dallas and found a job. I worked for a few years then joined the military. I've been out of the military now for eight years. I have a college degree, thanks to the GI Bill. I have a wife and two kids. I'm successful, I make a good living.

I survived and you can too. The world is a big place, especially if you live in a small town. Find something you love and follow it.

What do you enjoy doing? What are your strengths?

I've found that focusing on weaknesses isn't always the best way to go. I know and acknowledge my weaknesses and try to avoid situations where they can be exploited. I focus on my strengths and use them to my advantage. I use my strengths to help others.

I will also say that exercise does wonders for a good night's sleep. Get up early and run, ride a bike, swim, do anything physical. That exercise will make the day easier to face and will bring confidence that you may not know that you had.

Best of luck to you.