clean HUMOR :)

[sk8joyful]

At 'WINco': (a western employee-owned grocery-chain), with
astronomically-HUGE stores, they posted by the Honey:
"Danger!
DON'T lift lid. Bees will escape..."

(cracks me up- yeah, I'm easily Amused)

[Criseyde]

My favorite jokes (highlight for the answer):
What's the difference between a cat and a comma?
A cat has claws at the ends of its paws and a comma's a pause at the end of a clause.

Quelle est la différence entre un chrétien et un idolâtre? (sorry, this one doesn't work in English)
Le chrétien sert le Dieu qui l'a fait; l'idolâtre sert le dieu qu'il a fait.

[ZephyrusX]

Originally Posted by Criseyde

Quelle est la différence entre un chrétien et un idolâtre? (sorry, this one doesn't work in English)
Le chrétien sert le Dieu qui l'a fait; l'idolâtre sert le dieu qu'il a fait.

C'est la difference, n'est-ce pas?



I can't for the life of me figure out the white text.

[sk8joyful]

Originally Posted by Criseyde

My favorite jokes (highlight for the answer):
What's the difference between a cat and a comma?
A cat has claws at the ends of its paws and a comma's a pause at the end of a clause.

The 1st. one is Cute

[Criseyde]

Originally Posted by sk8joyful

that's Cute
---
For the other, supposed, joke tho - why make fun of us Christians. That doesn't speak highly of atheists), &
what of the rule about LOVing others as ourselves
sigh.
Guess I start a (don't ridicule people) new Humor thread...

Did you understand the joke?

[VinceG]

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

Say that one out loud in a heavy droning voice. Guaranteed to get laughs.

[sk8joyful]

An eccentric PHILOSOPHY professor gave a one question final exam
after a semester dealing with a broad array of topics. The class was
already seated and ready to go when the professor picked up his chair,
plopped it on his desk and wrote on the board: "Using everything we
have learned this semester, prove that this chair does not exist.

Fingers flew, erasers erased, notebooks were filled in furious fashion.
Some students wrote over 30 pages in one hour attempting to refute
the existence of the chair. One member of the class however, was up
and finished in less than a minute.

Weeks later when the grades were posted, the rest of the group
wondered how he could have gotten an "A" when he had barely written
anything at all. His answer consisted of two words: "What chair?"


Yeah!!! for the powerful ..................... skills of a child

[sk8joyful]

Originally Posted by Criseyde

Quelle est la différence entre un chrétien et un idolâtre? (sorry, this one doesn't work in English)
Le chrétien sert le Dieu qui l'a fait; l'idolâtre sert le dieu qu'il a fait.

Did you understand the joke?

I think it said: What is the difference between a Christian, & idolatry?

The Christian praises the God that he believes in;
idolatry praises gods that he believes in.

(about 'sert', am not sure. sorta embarassing as
30 yrs. ago, I lived amongst the French for 17 months).

[Criseyde]

Originally Posted by sk8joyful

I think it said: What is the difference between a Christian, & idolatry?

The Christian praises the God that he believes in;
idolatry praises gods that he believes in.

(about 'sert', am not sure. sorta embarassing as
30 yrs. ago, I lived amongst the French for 17 months).

The Christian worships the God who made him; the idolater worships the god he made.

The joke is in the wordplay, same as the other joke I posted -- "sert le Dieu qui l'a fait" sounds the same as "sert le dieu qu'il a fait."

Do you still think it was meant to mock Christians? I don't get that from it, at all, and it certainly wasn't my intent in posting it!

[sk8joyful]

Originally Posted by Criseyde

The Christian worships the God who made him;
the idolater worships the god he made.

The joke is in the wordplay, same as the other joke I posted --
"sert le Dieu qui l'a fait" sounds the same as "sert le dieu qu'il a fait."

Do you still think it was meant to mock Christians?
I don't get that from it, at all, and it certainly wasn't my intent in posting it!

oh boy, now I'm embarassed 3!!! times:
for getting 2 words mixed up, & then posting it. I'm
sorry. And I Agree: it's actually the other way around.

[Criseyde]

Originally Posted by sk8joyful

oh boy, now I'm embarassed 3!!! times:
for getting 2 words mixed up, & then posting it. I'm
sorry. And I Agree: it's actually the other way around.

No worries.

[agsags]

Three logicians are having breakfast at a diner.

The waiter asks "Is everyone having coffee?"
The first logician says "I don't know".
The second logician says "I don't know".
The third logician says "No".

[sk8joyful]

MOTHERS OF THE FAMOUS

Columbus' Mother:
"I don't care what you've discovered, Chris. You still could have written."

Michelangelo's Mother:
"Mike, can't you paint on walls like other children?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to get that stuff off the ceiling?"

Mary's Mother:
"I'm not upset that your lamb followed you to school, Mary,
but I would like to know how he got a better grade than you."

Batman's Mother:
"It's a nice car, Bruce, but do you realize how much the insurance is going to be?"

Goldilocks Mother:
"I've got a bill here for a broken chair from the Bear family.
Do you know anything about this, Goldie?"

Albert Einstein's Mother:
"But, Albert, it's your senior picture.
Can't you do something about your hair?
Styling gel, mousse, something...?"

George Washington's Mother:
"The next time I catch you throwing money across the Potomac,
you can kiss your allowance good-bye!"

Superman's Mother:
"Clark, your father and I have discussed it,
and we've decided you can have your own telephone line.
Now will you quit spending so much time in all those phone booths?"

Thomas Edison's Mother:
"Of course I'm proud that you invented the electric light bulb, Thomas.
Now turn off that light and get to bed."

- AUTHOR UNKNOWN -