Funny Replies To Other Boards
 

I don't want to spam out other boards...especially when they're legitimate questions or observations.

But some of them lend themselves to SO MUCH satire, the royster-mind goes wild.

"What To Eat To Strengthen Hair?"

Steel wool helps that Afro look, spaghetti has been clinically-proven to relax curly hair, and Curly doesn't even HAVE hair...nyuck nyuck nyuck!

>BONK!<

OW! WOOWOOWOOWOOWOOWOOWOO



PLEASE NOTE: It is not my intention to disrespect others or diminish the import of other boards' posters. It is in a spirit of fairness I ask contributors to this thread to consider others' feelings, and post with loving discernment. royster

MEAT REPLACMENTS:

That would be your SECOND wife.


OR...RIGHT hand.

"Would you kill your t.v.?"

No, I just sit it in the corner and make it watch itself.
(Segue into "Things your mother tells you" by Flying Shadow)

"Seth's spellcasting is opening"

Door prizes for the first 100 vexed.

"Glowing blue pork found in China"

Then I want my money back for these tickets: they're SUPPOSED to be in concert in Anaheim!

"The moon and us"

Discussion about the unreleased Pink Floyd album that featured a Canned Ham* on the album cover.


*an American expression for exposing one's buttox through a car window, pressed up against the glass


thus making it an alBUM

Burning fat first, or gaining muscle then losing fat?
 

Depends on the barbeque grill and the chef, cooking time and cut of meat.

Discussion about porn and the sex industry
 

@!!#$@%@!!!
That's not &%$!! true, BeefMeat.


ONLY if you *&^!@# while in the *&&^%@!!

What would you say if you woke up to the person above you in your bed?
 

The same thing I ALWAYS say to the person above me in bed: let's take a break, I can't breathe.

Who are your favorite contrarians and why?
 

Mary, Mary


Because she's so contrary, with her garden and cockle shells and all.

Sex on first date "poll".

_I'm a dumb guy and my penis does all my thinking
_I'm a guy who tells the ladies I completely respect them so I can get laid
_I'm a woman, and a slut
_I'm a classy and respectable female. Sex?! Oh gross.
.

Good one, sorter!

Q: Will you respect me in the morning?

A: Hell, I don't respect you now. Why would the morning make things different?

Vancouver Riots
 

...opening act for the Beasty Boys

So uh... What is wrong with having a World Government?
 

Is "Failure" a bad thing?
 

According to Homer Simpson, no: that word appears on his nuclear plant controls all the time.

People Telling You That You Are Amazing
 

Kreskin reveals his fan mail.



The Amazing Kreskin

I'm tired. I don't do anything, I'm lazy, lack willpower, etc., etc. What do I do?
 

Obviously sit on yer ASS a lot.
____________________
Is this a trick question?
____________________
Oh! A career riddle!
My guess is: Guidance Counselor.

Simply Be, or Work for It?
 

Well, gee, it depends on who's on top, donchathink?

(I am CERTAIN I'm going to get into trouble for these...):d

Can you have a "kinda-sorta" spirit guide?
 

Maybe. I dunnoh.

Is opposing the ground zero mosque just thinly veiled racism?
 

...or thickly-turbaned jogging?

3 puzzling questions about women...
 

.what's with the "toilet seat issue"?

.why the reluctance to enjoy the Three Stooges?

.are you gonna eat those fries or NOT?

any study tips fr me?
 

Yes: learn to use complete words, in complete sentences.

How to Raise $1,000,000
 

Women at war
 

Met a girl, having trouble with her sexual past
 

Oh. I was wondering about the neck brace and black eyes...

I want to know if this is true or false?
 

That's why God made coins.

Met a girl, having trouble with her sexual past
 

One word: penicillin

:d:d:d:d

Thanks, bluestar: I never know when I'm doing well, especially when others don't post.