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Old 02-09-2007, 08:52 AM   #1 (permalink)
JHL
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Default Good joke! (er, if you're a guy)

A man took his wife to the rodeo and one of the first exhibits they
stopped at was the breeding bulls. They went up to the first pen and there was a sign attached that said, "This bull mated 50 times last year." The wife
playfully nudged her husband in the ribs and said, "He mated 50 times last
year."

They walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said, "This
bull mated 120 times last year." The wife gave her husband a healthy jab
and said, "That's more than twice a week! You could learn a lot from him."

They walked to the third pen and it had a sign attached that said, in
capital letters, "This bull mated 365 times last year." The wife, so
excited that her elbow nearly broke her husband's ribs, said, "That's once a day. You could REALLY learn something from this one."
The husband looked at her and said, "Go over and ask him if it was with
the same cow."
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Old 02-09-2007, 04:25 PM   #2 (permalink)
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I wouldn't have gotten it nearly as well if I didn't know that bulls rarely mate with the same cow twice.
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Old 02-09-2007, 06:23 PM   #3 (permalink)
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LOL! That's a good one. Good thing we're not animals!
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Old 02-09-2007, 06:25 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Well, you can't step in the same river twice, so then you can't make love with the same woman twice, right?
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Old 02-13-2007, 08:52 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Er, of course! Yes thats it! Boy, you must be also be really spiritual to have intuited that

phew
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Old 02-15-2007, 02:27 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ElizaJ View Post
LOL! That's a good one. Good thing we're not animals!
We're not?
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Old 02-15-2007, 10:37 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Well, one would hope that humans with their reasoning intellect are a cut above animals! But, yes, some people do act like animals, hence, they must be animals.
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Old 02-15-2007, 08:02 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Everyone acts like an animal, reasoning animals but animals nonetheless.

I'm not so sure we're "a cut above" though. No animal has caused such destruction for so many others than us. In many ways we're more like a virus than an animal species.
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Old 02-16-2007, 06:25 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Quote:
In many ways we're more like a virus than an animal species.
Do you hear that Mr Andersen? That is the sound of inevitability. That is the sound..

Sorry, I just had a Matrix flashback
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Old 02-16-2007, 09:37 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Narz View Post
Everyone acts like an animal, reasoning animals but animals nonetheless.

I'm not so sure we're "a cut above" though. No animal has caused such destruction for so many others than us. In many ways we're more like a virus than an animal species.
Whoa, that's a pretty dim view of the human species. Is there no one on this Earth that you deem worthy of not being labeled as acting like an animal?
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Old 02-18-2007, 01:13 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Angela View Post
Well, you can't step in the same river twice, so then you can't make love with the same woman twice, right?
Our cells are constantly dying and being replaced by new ones. How many times can you bed your wife before you become an adulterer?
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Old 02-18-2007, 01:22 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Default Cells and DNA

All cells contain your DNA, hence, you're always the same person.
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Old 02-18-2007, 01:27 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ElizaJ View Post
LOL! That's a good one. Good thing we're not animals!
We're slightly differently evolved animals. Not better... just different. Having ideas about being a cut above other creatures is what brings about animal cruelty and even racism (Yes.. some people believe other races are inferior animals).

We're not greater, or superior but we are different.

Obviously I'm not saying that you're cruel to animals or racist. I'm just saying that that kind of view point can be dangerous because it leads to awful things
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Old 02-18-2007, 02:15 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Default Reasoning and Intellect

No, we are not animals, we are humans. We were created with an intellect and the ability to reason; neither item was conferred upon any animals from the animal kingdom. It is the thought pattern that equates humans to animals that allows people the freedom to behave like animals and others to condone such behavior. Humans were given the responsibility to care for lower-level life-forms, i.e. animals, and this does not condone animal cruelty nor racism of any kind.
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Old 02-18-2007, 02:27 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Well... I think that we come into this world, feed, breath, reproduce, die, etc like animals. The only difference is that we build better buildings than beavers and use better tools than chimps. That is because we have a higher neuron to mass ratio in our larger brains. This does not make us "better" than other animals... only more dangerous.

Would a superior, wise non-animal ever bring the planet that it shares with other creation to the brink of destruction over matters related to personal wealth and power?

Sorry I dragged this offtopic Interesting joke.
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Old 02-18-2007, 02:32 AM   #16 (permalink)
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Default Free Will

Yes, I understand your point but that is where free will comes in. We are given the choice of choosing life or destruction, hence you see around you the choice that many people are making. But don't despair, Universal Intelligence will correct matters much sooner than people think.
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Old 02-18-2007, 10:07 AM   #17 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ElizaJ View Post
Whoa, that's a pretty dim view of the human species. Is there no one on this Earth that you deem worthy of not being labeled as acting like an animal?
There are very few who qualify for such an honor.

Maybe Mr. Walt Whitman, but alas, he is gone.

"I think I could turn and live with animals, they are so placid and self-contain'd,
I stand and look at them long and long.

They do not sweat and whine about their condition,
They do not lie awake in the dark and weep for their sins,
They do not make me sick discussing their duty to God,
Not one is dissatisfied, not one is demented with the mania of owning things,
Not one kneels to another, nor to his kind that lived thousands of years ago,
Not one is respectable or unhappy over the whole earth."

Quote:
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But don't despair, Universal Intelligence will correct matters much sooner than people think.
Yeah, GWB believes in endtimes too, that's why he doesn't give a flying f...duck about the planet. God will come and judge the quick and the dead (mostly dead) and fix the global mess we've caused.

Not likely.
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Old 02-18-2007, 10:46 AM   #18 (permalink)
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Default Gwb

GWB is a puppet for warmongers and war profiteers and is himself a warmonger and war profiteer and doesn't believe any of the God nonsense he spouts.
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Old 02-18-2007, 10:17 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Quote:
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GWB is a puppet for warmongers and war profiteers and is himself a warmonger and war profiteer and doesn't believe
Well God was a pretty warlike Fellow himself.

Though fatherhood seemed to mellow Him somewhat.

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God nonsense
Blaspheme!
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Old 02-18-2007, 10:19 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Default God Nonsense

Blaspheme?! You took my quote way out of context.

I said: the God nonsense he spouts.

Meaning the GOD nonsense that GWB spouts, which it is. . . GWB spouts total nonsense every time he opens his mouth, whether it's about GOD or anything else for that matter.
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Old 02-18-2007, 10:58 PM   #21 (permalink)
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Blaspheme?! You took my quote way out of context.
I know, may Jesus forgive me.

Last edited by Narz; 03-04-2007 at 11:25 AM.
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Old 03-04-2007, 10:39 AM   #22 (permalink)
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This is actually called, The Coolidge Effect.

Coolidge effect - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
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Old 03-08-2007, 12:27 PM   #23 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ElizaJ View Post
LOL! That's a good one. Good thing we're not animals!
We are animals...

Quote:
Originally Posted by ElizaJ View Post
No, we are not animals, we are humans.
Dear Eliza,

You don't have to be a mathematician to understand basic set theory. If X is an element of A and A is a subset of B, then naturally X is an element of B.

In other words, if one is a human, then since all humans are animals, one is an animal. Similarly, if one is human, and since all humans have cells, one has cells.

Just because one is "human" doesn't mean one doesn't have cells! Similarly, humans are "multi cellular, capable of locomotion at some stage in their life cycle, responsive to their environment, and feed by consuming other organisms or parts of them," and hence animals. A sea sponge is an animal.

Humans are also composed of atomic particles. Would you argue that just because a human is a specific composition of atomic particles, it is not composed of atomic particles? Of course not!

Sorry to go on such a tantrum, but honestly, now. I will leave you with an analogy to what you said to illustrate your naivety:

No, houses are not buildings, they are houses.

Last edited by TechnoGuyRob; 03-08-2007 at 12:34 PM.
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