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  #31 (permalink)  
Old 12-03-2007, 06:52 PM
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Granted, but you've been fired and arrested for embezzlement.

I wish I had an unlimited supply of free gasoline.
Granted, and all vehicles now run on diesel.

I wish I could travel to the planet Mars.
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  #32 (permalink)  
Old 12-03-2007, 09:03 PM
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Originally Posted by seeker5 View Post
Granted, and all vehicles now run on diesel.

I wish I could travel to the planet Mars.
Granted. Spacesuit must be bought seperately. Oxygen not included. To enter rocket, please remove overly complicated wrapper.

I wish I could change my eyecolor on demand.
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  #33 (permalink)  
Old 12-03-2007, 10:02 PM
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I wish I could change my eyecolor on demand.
Granted, but it is done with nail polish.

I wish I could live in a tropical paradise with a beautiful adoring wife.
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  #34 (permalink)  
Old 12-03-2007, 10:32 PM
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Granted, but it is done with nail polish.

I wish I could live in a tropical paradise with a beautiful adoring wife.
Granted. But global warming will eventually strike and the beautiful adoring wife is married to someone else

I wish I had unlimited creativity.
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  #35 (permalink)  
Old 12-03-2007, 10:44 PM
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Granted. But global warming will eventually strike and the beautiful adoring wife is married to someone else

I wish I had unlimited creativity.
Granted! Thinking creatively causes you to vomit.

I wish I could transport myself anywhere in the world instantaneously.
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  #36 (permalink)  
Old 12-03-2007, 10:46 PM
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Granted, but the molecules in your body slowly disintegrate from overuse of your teleporter.

I wish I never have to go hungry again.
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  #37 (permalink)  
Old 12-03-2007, 11:47 PM
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Granted, but you have no appetite so you gradually starve to death.

I wish there were more hours in the day so I could accomplish more.
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  #38 (permalink)  
Old 12-04-2007, 02:05 AM
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I wish there were more hours in the day so I could accomplish more.
Granted, but you are given a whole lot more to do to fill up those extra hours.

I wish I could draw.

..
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  #39 (permalink)  
Old 12-04-2007, 02:36 AM
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Granted, you become a nurse for the red cross's blood drives.



I wish I was more athletic.
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  #40 (permalink)  
Old 12-04-2007, 06:16 AM
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Granted, but the steroids you take cause you to end up in prison.

I wish I could jump 10 feet high.
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  #41 (permalink)  
Old 12-04-2007, 10:02 AM
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Granted, but you try that indoors and crack your skull on the ceiling.

I wish my commute wasn't so long.
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  #42 (permalink)  
Old 12-04-2007, 01:15 PM
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Granted but now you spend 24 hours a day at work with no overtime.

I wish I had a pool
Last edited by Beloved : 12-04-2007 at 01:18 PM.
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  #43 (permalink)  
Old 12-04-2007, 01:19 PM
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Granted but now you spend 24 hours a day at work with no overtime.

I wish I had a pool
Granted. Your basement's flooded.

I wish I didn't have to go to my company xmas party.
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  #44 (permalink)  
Old 12-04-2007, 02:04 PM
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Granted. Your basement's flooded.

I wish I didn't have to go to my company xmas party.
Granted, but you miss the boss handing out bonuses as gitfs in a raffle that everyone there got at least $5k.

I wish I was really unhappy and so self absorbed to not even be able to relate to anyone.
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  #45 (permalink)  
Old 12-04-2007, 07:25 PM
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Granted, but you miss the boss handing out bonuses as gitfs in a raffle that everyone there got at least $5k.

I wish I was really unhappy and so self absorbed to not even be able to relate to anyone.
Granted, but you become so alienated that after a while, you can not even relate to yourself anymore.

I wish MS Windows wasn't such a kludge.
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  #46 (permalink)  
Old 12-04-2007, 07:33 PM
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Granted, but you become so alienated that after a while, you can not even relate to yourself anymore.

I wish MS Windows wasn't such a kludge.
Sorry, not possible.
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  #47 (permalink)  
Old 12-06-2007, 01:31 AM
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I wish MS Windows wasn't such a kludge.
Granted, but the new version costs $100,000.

I wish I knew how to whistle.
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  #48 (permalink)  
Old 12-06-2007, 01:32 AM
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Granted. Now dogs come running from miles around to hump your leg.

I wish I was Sting.
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  #49 (permalink)  
Old 12-06-2007, 07:58 AM
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Granted, only you are the version of him who ends up not audition for the Police.

I wish everyone would stop wishing and start doing.
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  #50 (permalink)  
Old 12-06-2007, 12:55 PM
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Granted. Now the 6 billion people on earth are auditioning for American Idol.

I wish I'm in a deserted beach somewhere with Keira Knightley doing really kinky things.
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  #51 (permalink)  
Old 12-06-2007, 02:23 PM
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Granted. Now the 6 billion people on earth are auditioning for American Idol.

I wish I'm in a deserted beach somewhere with Keira Knightley doing really kinky things.
Granted, you're in a deserted beach in a very religious part of Saudi Arabia, Keira Knightley has been dead for 5 days and her body is stinky and rotting.

I wish it wasn't so cold up here.
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  #52 (permalink)  
Old 12-06-2007, 03:26 PM
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Granted, the weather gets warmer where you live, but you move to Alaska to work as a dogslegdedriver.

I wish I could travel in time.
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  #53 (permalink)  
Old 12-06-2007, 03:51 PM
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Granted, and you travel back in time, fall in love with your mother and give brith to yourself.

I wish my spiritual side was more noticeable to me.
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  #54 (permalink)  
Old 12-06-2007, 07:43 PM
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Granted, and you travel back in time, fall in love with your mother and give brith to yourself.

I wish my spiritual side was more noticeable to me.
Granted. Alas, you find it's unbearably dull. All they ever do in the spirit realm is watch old re-runs of Barney Miller and Gilligan's Island.

I wish today was Friday.
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  #55 (permalink)  
Old 12-06-2007, 08:15 PM
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Granted - it's Friday. Sgt. Joe Friday. Tomorrow is Officer Gannon.


I wish I had a clue.
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"It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are." - e e cummings
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  #56 (permalink)  
Old 12-06-2007, 08:53 PM
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Originally Posted by Lola View Post
Granted - it's Friday. Sgt. Joe Friday. Tomorrow is Officer Gannon.


I wish I had a clue.
Granted. Your clue reveals that it's not the Scarlet Lady, but you already knew that.

I wish I was the absolute, unopposed, loved by all, healthy, "impossible to kill", world ruler of Earth.
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  #57 (permalink)