How to get back on top

[Freebornman]

Last year I had a financial disaster and lost everything, I mean everything to a very clever crook . I grew up in London during the sixties and life has always been enjoyable. Despite the ups and downs that it brought me I have always been a survivor and managed any storm that came my way. But now I am sixty and I find life very scary. I’ve always been a very positive open minded person so I don’t want this to sound like a sob story . How do I pull through this one? Remember I’m sixty and broke. Creative suggestions welcome.

[Lola]

Although our circumstances differ, Freebornman, I very much understand how it feels to wake up later in life (I'm 46) and realize the future you'd always counted on was not going to happen the way you'd planned.

I can only offer the suggestion that you exercise great care in the messages you give yourself and the universe. (A lesson I insist on repeating - but I'm getting better!)

Originally Posted by Freebornman

I lost everything... I find life very scary...Remember I’m sixty and broke.

Focus on what you DO have. Make note of gratitude. Expect good in your life. Challenge the truthfulness of the statements you make to yourself. (Really? You have NOTHING? Or is it that you have something different?) Question your perspective - what's "on top"? According to whom?

You may find life (really) begins at 60!

[Shamou]

Originally Posted by Freebornman

But now I am sixty and I find life very scary.

May I ask you what is wrong with being 60...??? I'm past 60 and still kicking assess...

You have life experience, so if you are healthy... the whole world is opened for you... if you play your cards right... it would not be an exaggeration to expect to earn more in the next five years than most people ever earn in their entire lifetime...

Man... life is just starting... shake a leg will ya...
.

[Lallymac]

Hi Freeborn,
I agree, it is very scary. I lost everything in my early fourties (a business, family home, relationship) and was renting a tiny, grotty, leaky flat, on my own with three teenagers and a toddler. I remember panicking if I heard the toilet roll flip over too many times when one of the kids was in the loo.
How do you rebuild 25 yrs of hard work on your own and take care of all the immediate needs? But you can and you will.
You are the common denominator. While all the things you own and the trappings of a lifestyle, make life more enjoyable, they are not who you are.
Who you are is still there, living, breathing, ready for the next part of your journey.
It's time to take stock, reassess your values and place your security in yourself not externals. I've had to let go of a lot of old programs about what my security is and what's important. It takes time to mentally clean out years of social conditioning. I know it's hard to imagine at first but I've found having a positive attitude and strong sense of gratitude for what I do have has helped me create a new sense of self freedom.
Life goes on hun. Worrying and stressing about what was, or should be, is corrosive. Now's your chance to explore yourself in new ways, start a whole new chapter.
Lallymac

[Rosie327]

I agree with what people are saying to you. Don't focus on what was, tune in to what is. That said, I do want you to realize you are allowed to grieve for what you've lost - but find a way to do it while you're moving on. Certainly you learned many lessons in your sixty years, even if they are lessons in what didn't work. And try to look at this as a fresh start, which many people would welcome! Let us know how it's going!

[Freebornman]

Boy! where do I start? A little more than a year ago I made this post.I was in such a bleak place in my life and I spent hours on this site prior to that,searching for some inspiration and in the end I asked. In return I got a wonderful gift from you people for which I'm truly thankful.
I was able to draw something from each of those posts up to and including the last one. My life has turned around, not from money but I havegot richer. I can see clearer, but I haven't got new glasses! I now have a small flat which I rent and I love it. @Lola for reminding me to ask myself 'Do I have NOTHING or something different" ..Oh, I have something very different thank you!. and @Shamou for telling me to shake a leg will ya! I've been shaking it, thank you. and @Lallymac thank you for the empathy, i read and absorbed every word.and @Rosie327 for reminding me that it's been O.K. to grieve over what I've lost.
As soon as i began to make positive decisions everything started to flow again. By positive i don't mean affirmations but acknowledgments to myself of the wonderful country i live in and all that is around me.
I felt the tide change for me last May shortly after this place came up and (i was about to say friends i haven't seen came out of the woodwork) but I was the one who came out of the woodwork. Life is on the up and in this present climate I can be happy that i have NO debts! Spring is here in New Zealand and like me, everything is starting to grow again. Thanks.