Is it cheating if I get a psychic reading? (Blog)

[Erin Pavlina]

Use this thread to discuss the following entry from Erin Pavlina's blog:

Is it cheating if I get a psychic reading?

[Trezker]

I have a saying about single-player games: "If you can do it, it's not cheating"
Multi-player is trickier though, people need to agree on what is fair and what is not.

Darn, now I got confused. But still getting a reading certainly never can be called cheating. It's more like looking at the tips in the manual, or calling customer service.

Offtopic:
I seem to spot your blog threads before I see the blog post itself. It's very common with your posts but not with Steve's. You must be publishing at different times of the day.

[Aylana]

Well this was a bit freaky! I haven't been to the site in a while and started catching up on the blog posts I have missed. Read Steve's earn your first love dollar one which got me thinking as I was reading what I would love to make money doing. What I would love to make money doing is writing, but I really don't think I am good enough. I figured though that I would leave myself open to opportunities and signs that I could do this rather than doubting. Then as I move on to the forums I notice Erins new blog has appeared while I am online complete with an example of a message to a woman from her guides about quitting her job to become a writer because she is good enough!!! I don't know if it is anything more than a co-incidence but I feel all weird and tingly all over!

[Savage]

Originally Posted by Aylana

Then as I move on to the forums I notice Erins new blog has appeared while I am online complete with an example of a message to a woman from her guides about quitting her job to become a writer because she is good enough!!! I don't know if it is anything more than a co-incidence but I feel all weird and tingly all over!

That isn't a coincidence. It's called a smack upside the head from the universe.

[Trezker]

Hey, it may very well be you she's writing about unless Erin says otherwise...

My sisters partner once met a guy who was supposed to call about something but never did. He blurted out a theory straight from the mind as to why he hadn't called just as a joke, "unexpected expenses, water heater broke", and he was right! How high are he odds of guessing exactly that?

So when you're just writing something random as an example, you may well be channeling the truth for someone.

[Aylana]

Thanks Steve and Trezker! I've wanted to be a writer for a long time, but I always stop writing because I fear I'm not good enough and there is no point. But no more! This may be the prod/smack upside the head I needed to get back into it.

No fear!

[Bruce Achterberg]

I can relate when people say that it feels like it's "cheating" when you get a reading, although that's very vague, so lets be specific and clear.

I don't think getting a reading is cheating in the sense that you shouldn't do it, but I do think it's a little lame in the sense that it lacks challenge. This may sound strange, but I actually enjoy a bit of challenge because it brings out the best in me.

I enjoy periods of time where things are not as challenging--challenge *all* the time will grind you down--but getting all or most of your answers sounds like you're depriving yourself of an awesome experience. For me it's not the destination that is enjoyable--I frequently reach "destinations" and then don't think twice of them. It's the journey that I love, and part of that journey is not really knowing where you're going or how to get there, observing your options, having a desire arise, clarifying your desire, and then making choices and executing them. (Interestingly, this has a lot to do with my achiever talent theme, but anyway.)

While a reading would be nice, I'm much more interested in having an ability that I can readily rely on myself.

I'd honestly have issues trusting what a medium might tell me, not because I don't believe them, but because I understand how very specific I am, and how non-specific most people are (it is made blatantly obvious to me every day), so while the message a medium receives might be great, can they accurately, effectively convey it? Perhaps a very good medium could. Perhaps it draws on skills that have nothing to do with psychic ability. Perhaps there's something I don't understand about mediumship and psychics function differently to how I think they do.

I'm probably sounding like a bit of a skeptic, heh, but that couldn't be further from the truth. If anything, I'm just a bit doubtful that I'll be able to reasonably find a medium who can cater to my specificity. In the entire world, I'm sure there's someone who can do it. Or perhaps a medium can just bypass the need to cater to specific personality traits.

But those are some of the things that cause me to think, "hmmm, a medium would be nice, but..." so I tend to invest my money in other things.

Postscript

At the same time, I'm about to make a post after this one that will seem to contradict what I said in this post (check my post history in a few minutes if you're curious). That's just my specificity at play again. I don't recommend you try to understand it since, while I may have it no other way, most people who try to wrap their heads around it tear their clothes off, their faces twisted in horror, and proceed to flee into the desert.

[Bruce Achterberg]

For people who actually think that getting a reading is cheating and shouldn't be done for non-subjective reasons (subjective reasons are fine, so long as you're aware of the other options), I recommend reading David Sirlin's book, Playing to Win, available online for free.

Or at least, read this section:
Sirlin.net — Your source of shocking insights on game design » Introducing . . . the Scrub

Or if you prefer a more complete version of the above section that is an extract from a book (although the book version is more updated. Confused yet?), see here:
Sirlin.net — Your source of shocking insights on game design » Blog Archive » Playing to Win, Part 1

Perhaps I should take my own advice and listen to what Sirlin says in those articles, but for me "winning" is part of what I described in the above post. Winning without challenge may "win" in terms of objective results, but life isn't as black and white as games (which is both an advantage and a disadvantage).

Bring on The Matrix, I say.

[Erin Pavlina]

Aylana, actually I will say this... when I wrote the part about what the guides were saying to "mary" my guides specifically told me to put in an example about her becoming a writer. I almost went back and changed the example but my guides told me someone out there would read the example and felt it would apply to them so leave it in there because it needed to be in there. So I'm not surprised by your reaction, and it's possible other people will experience the same reaction who are on the fence about writing. But thanks for posting because it helps me validate why they were so insistent I keep that part in the example.

As for Bruce... I hear ya! Challenge is important. But when I do a reading, the guides offer insight and wisdom, not cheat codes. You still do all the work, but it's helpful to know if you're at least on the right track and if you're learning what you intended to learn.

Also, quick side note, don't confuse medium with psychic. A medium talks to your deceased loved ones who rarely offer advice about life. They usually offer validation that they are still with you or are okay on the other side. A psychic speaks to your guides to get wisdom and insight for ya.

[{aspiring_to_clarity}]

I felt kinda tingly when I saw the part about the lady quiting her job to become a writer. It's really about time I book a reading already (I will do it, Dan, I promise!).

[Angela]

You know, Tigerlilly made a remark about how hard it is to see things clearly when you're right in the middle of 'em. That's the feeling I had when I booked a reading with Erin last week -- in addition to curiosity and fun, I also had the sense that I had a blind spot. Being in the middle of my life, there are perspectives that I don't even know to try on -- what I don't even know I don't know. Generating receptiveness for what Erin had to say was just a kind of waking up technique, like requesting a wake-up call at the a luxury hotel. In some ways I'm sleeping, so it makes sense to request help in waking up and moving forward with my day, with living a life I'm in love with.

And what she gave me was not: "you have a gay cousin named Steve" or some other form of "psychic" validation. I would not have found anything like that useful. What she did give me was: here are the messages I'm getting for you (apparently my guides inundated her with messages for me!), and those messages surprised me with both their practical application and their ability to have me seeing certain things in an entirely new light. For instance, I've been feeling stopped in my website/coaching, and she (they?) pointed out that it would be a good idea to slow down, to stop careening, gunning the gas and bumping into walls. Well, I hadn't boldly looked at that, but that's sure what I've been doing! Feeling under the gun, a little frantic, anxious to do it right and be perfect. My guides were all about Slow Down and Be Easier on Yourself, something I have not been willing to do lately! Hadn't even occurred to me as a possibility. When I mentioned that to Danger Man, he practically hollered: yeaaaaaahhhh, you should dooooo that!!!!! Give yourself a break!

So it's not "cheating" -- rather, it's about being interconnected, and tapping into the generous perspective that can be shared by another human being. When you find a human being whose perspectives you instinctively trust, it makes perfect sense to make yourself available to the flow of our interconnection.

That's how I see it.

[Angela]

Oh, wait, there was one thing that was kind of funny and "psychic." Erin (my guides) recommended a particular book that was something about coaching guide for coaches. As it happened, I had seen a book called "Coaching Guide for Coaches" that I had been meaning to buy but never got around to because it wasn't available on Kindle. Hmmm I says to myself. I went to do a search but didn't bother with Amazon because this small book wasn't available that way, but sure enough, now it arose as a Kindle book! Except -- the title is NOT "Coaching Guide for Coaches." Someone who reviewed the book described is as a good coaching guide for coaches, but the title is something else entirely. But since that's what I remembered as being the title, that's how my guides led me back to it. Spooky!

[Aylana]

Thanks for that Erin! You never know you may be responsible for a flood of best sellers from new aspiring writers who read that blog!

With regards to the is it cheating issue. Nah I don't think so. But I know several people who regularly get readings of the variety where the psychic predicts their future, and I always think, doesn't knowing what is coming spoil half the fun??????

[wulph]

Originally Posted by Angela

[...] a book called "Coaching Guide for Coaches" [...] but the title is something else entirely[...]

So how do you decide which book you're supposed to get? I guess you'll have to read 'em both?

[Angela]

Originally Posted by wulph

So how do you decide which book you're supposed to get? I guess you'll have to read 'em both?

It's one and the same book. I thought the title of the book I was thinking of was "Coaching Guide for Coaches" but it's actually something else. I googled my mistaken title, and the real title came up deep into the search because some reviewer had described it as a coaching guide for coaches, and that's the part, not the real title, that stuck in my psyche. If Erin had said the real title, I wouldn't have recognized it and might have even dismissed it. (How I recognized the book in the google search was by the cover, not the title.)

[Bruce Achterberg]

Hmmm, I thought a medium could connect with guides as well. I guess that's why I tend to not really get messages and stuff from deceased relatives, but am readily able to interpret other things (although I think I can do both, and I kind of think they draw upon the same core ability... and my intuition just conveyed that yes, that's true, but it's like a different frequency. So as per usual, I'll take that advice. Not trusting my intuition never works out well. )

Thanks for the clarification, Erin.

Interestingly, I think I might only attract intuitive guidance that resonates with my desired experience. I see most of you interpret very specific feelings and information, but for me, it's usually very... well, it's as if I get a gift, and the surface of it is useful in itself, but I get to unwrap it myself instead of having it already open.

I like it that way. =)

[seeker5]

Interesting post Erin!

That reminds me of another question I had. Isn't it cheating to know about the spiritual world as you've described it?

If we go into the world purposely with amnesia and not remembering the spiritual world, then isn't it cheating to access that world, to know the truth about where came from? Otherwise, why have the amnesia, then find out where we come from?

[amixa]

I've never thought of going to a psychic as cheating -- as others say it ruins half the fun :P -- but sometimes it can be helpful if you are experiencing stranger things in your life and you don't know how to approach it.

I hope I'm not going too off topic here but what about healers? I never thought it was cheating until I told my naturopath about my reiki practitioner and he said he's just worried about people not learning lessons by not learning to heal yourself. I'm hoping this isn't true because what I have now I really dont' want to come and haunt me later in my life if I can heal it with someone helping me now.

seeker5, I dont' think its cheating if you can remember or be exposed to it. I think its more like allowing others to see the possibility of something else if they don't remember it at all and whether or not they choose to go that route is well up to the greater part of the scheme of things. if we all did not remember or had no contact with anything what would be the point in that? we would all be blinded by this reality alone and would have no idea of anything else.

[amixa]

Originally Posted by amixa

I hope I'm not going too off topic here but what about healers? I never thought it was cheating until I told my naturopath about my reiki practitioner and he said he's just worried about people not learning lessons by not learning to heal yourself. I'm hoping this isn't true because what I have now I really dont' want to come and haunt me later in my life if I can heal it with someone helping me now.

Actually later after I wrote this I realize that it goes for the same thing as psychic readers.. they don't want you to suffer.. and it exists for a purpose.. so yeah. gotcha

[cinnabar]

Is it cheating to ask for directions when you are lost? Some say yes, some say no. But sometimes it is more important to get back on the right road and fast than it is to figure it out all by yourself. It really all depends on the situation, the person, the perspective...