spiritual world confusing me.

[dream23]

i said a while ago i was exploring my beliefs, well the last few weeks i'd had no clear spritual experiences and i was trying so hard. But i had also stopped praying, i gave thanks and that but wasn't really trying to communicate with God like i used to, i just meditated with the purpose of seeing somthing spiritual.

Then the last few days i've had a few personal problems and last night was the first time i'd had a hearty pray in long time, i cried and just let it all out.

then tried to go asleep, and the minute I switched my light off my room was a light with glows,flashes you name it more than had ever
happend before the amazing bit was a blue light that appeared the size of a fist that went from like deep blue to indigo IT WAS SOOO CLEAR!

what confuses me is i wasn't trying to see anything and it just happened, when before i was trying to a couldn't, whats with that?

[awakentransform]

Sometimes trying too hard gets in the way of achieving what we want. Especially with spiritual practices like meditation, it is best to practice with no attachment to the result. The consistent intention and action is the key.

Also it sounds like before you were trying to impose your own will on the matter. When you cried and let it all out, you were sort of surrendering to the higher will. It really helps the spiritual practice when we trust and surrender to the higher will.

"Thy will, not mine, be done."

Tianna