"signs" about possible soulmate false?

[Rockchick26]

I've posted about this situation in the IM section but i have more specific questions now and i'd like Erin's opinion too so hopefully she will see this :-) I know now that you cant use the Law of Attraction to attract a specific person. I tried to use it to bring this guy into my life and it backfired on me horribly which led to a wake up call about the way the LoA works. So now i know you can't do that. What i would like to know is,if you get signs from the universe that this person is your soulmate,can those signs be wrong? Or am i just interpreting them the wrong way? Here's what was happening,that i was putting my total faith in being true; I barely knew who this guy was when i had a dream about him,and in the dream we were at a wedding,dancing and kissing. After the dream my feelings for him exploded and for the next year and a half (and still now) i have never felt something so strong for anyone. I am a firm believer in dreams too. So then i tried this "ask your dreams" process (where you write down a question,focus on it,and your dream that night will give you the answer. So i asked the dream to show me how i was going to bring this guy into my life. That night i had a dream that i was supposed to give him my phone number but i was too shy so i went into another room and he followed me in there and asked me for change for a dollar and i asked why he didnt get it from someone else and he said "because i wanted it from YOU!" and he smiled at me. The next night i asked for more details about this and that dream took place an outdoor concert (which will actually be happening this August) and i saw him there. Also a few times when i was meditating i asked to see something about my future. I had flashes of us sitting on a park bench and he was holding my face in his hands about to kiss me,and also of us in my bedroom about to have sex. I didnt imagine these images,they appeared out of the blue,and i SAW them,like i was really seeing my future. I've also gotten TONS of smaller signs like seeing his name in places,seeing other "coincidences" regarding him. Well anyway this was all before i met him about 2 weeks ago,and when i met him,he pretty much seemed like he was trying to avoid my group and seemed irritated that we wanted to talk to him and then within a few seconds he turned around and walked away. Now that i know i cant attract HIM,why was i having these dreams/visions/signs??? If they are meaningless,then how can i trust anything anymore?

[Phantom of Destiny]

Hi Rockchick, I lately I've been experiencing the exact thing you have, I've been having dreams and signs about my possible soul mate too. I wouldn't automatically dismiss your "signs" as meaningless if I were you.

For me, the possibility of my guy being my soul mate started out when I was playing with a Ouija board a few years ago, and me and my friend were asking who we were going to marry and it spelled out his name. Since then, like you, I’ve been getting tons of odd signs and vivid dreams about us being together. So anyways, I wouldn't give up hope if I were you. I guess in this situation, only time will tell.

[Jennihul]

You won't know he was your soulmate for sure until your soul has passed on from this life and you meet again with the rest of your soul group before your next incarnation.

So, ditch the "soulmate" stuff. Just find someone who fits your life and enjoy each other.

I never understood why someone would willingly limit their Earthly pleasures and interactions waiting for a soulmate who may or may not even exist or be incarnated at the same time.

Jennifer

[danas]

hello Rockchick26.
Seeing names in places is so common when Im thinking about someone.
its basic IM. but it doesnt mean "here - this is a sign that he is the love of your life" but rather "here is a reflection of your thoughts, the universe is miroring"

My life has proven to me that "signs" are not meningless but they do not answer the question "Is he my soul mate", if I focus enugh on something or someone I will manage to manifest them them in my reality somehow.

Heres an example: I was once really into a man I had a breif encounter with and was living 900 miles away (the second I saw him I said "I found what im looking for".) I had so many incredible "signs" about him and he was just what I (thought I) wanted.
After we spent days together, he was back in his counrty and after about 2months of not hearing from him, I was missing him and one night I was really meditating about him, praying, asking for signs and went to bed.
At 4 am a book falls from the shelf opening on a page that said "Love" in big bold letters, not 2 min pass and I get an text message from him, saying "Im coming to your country in 2 weeks hope to see you"
Well there was my "sign"! I was so excited. And he did come, even extended his stay, we were together everyday for a month. and it was amazing, I was sure I found my soul mate (and so did he) but even then I saw that I wasnt feeling completely comfortable with him.
Anyway, after that visit we met again, this time it was a disaster, this time the sitation was tougher for external reasons, and it was a nightmare! This guy was so unsuitable for me, like he was square and I was round. No way could we have had a happy life together.
What Im saying is that if I look back at all the signs Ive had about guys,
I realise that I cant trust them to answer these big questions (plus I believe we have more then one "soulmate"- maybe even 20).
The only thing I can trust is my body.
My body knows. If Im in a situation which isnt good for me or that is good for me, I will feel it in my body, that is real- and that is what I can trust.
So IMO you should not set yourself on one specific guy, but rather focus on what you want. write down the list of traits that are really important to you (not too many), and trust the universe to send it to you.
I would advise you not waste your time trying to interpert signs. All they mean is: here are your thoughts- made physical.

[Rockchick26]

Isnt the concept of "soulmates" a matter of belief though? Obviously some believe in it 100%,others believe it cant be possible since your soul lives many lives,,yet others believe there is no such thing at all! I guess my next step is to get a pychic reading to get a professional's opinion about it. But then there will always be other pychics who would say something different! lol I feel like a ping pong ball,bouncing from one corner to another,never sure what to believe in anymore. I have always had a tendency to believe in miracles,magic,faith,signs,all that cool "unseen" stuff...so it is really depressing for me to consider that this stuff isnt real. I want to feel like something is MEANT for me and is going to happen. But i suppose that's taking the easy way out. I just cant help but want that magical moment where i meet "the one" and i want to know that it's coming before i get there. I guess i don't like uncertainty and thats a big no no right? lol I want to know that something that i want is coming,i dont want to live HOPING i get it but not really knowing for sure if i will. I guess its from living so long like that,that i cant trust in it anymore. Every time i see signs about a certain guy,i beleive in them,and i beleive i will be with him,and then i inevitably waste years of my life on waiting for this to happen when it never does. Ugh i hate how i really believe in things and then they dont work! This is why i got so upset this time,because i believed in this more than anything before. I guess i'll just work on myself and forget about relationships,even though by doing that,i feel like the universe will see that i'm happy alone and that isnt what i want. How do you live alone happily yet still want more,what does the universe respond to then? Ugh you'd think i would have this figured out by now,but i feel like i'm going in circles here LOL I'm sure you all are ready to slap me right off these boards LOL

[veranadine]

Hi Rockchick (and everyone else)

Check it out, after almost a decade as psychic channel I have had so many encounters with the concept of "soulmates" both through my own experiences and those of my clients. And I have come to understand one fundamental thing...

There are as many different types of "soulmate" as there are types of relationships in our manifest world.

What is happening when you see faces, names etc. and then meet the person and the situation goes entirely differently (and usually completely opposite) to your visions is that you are being told that you have past life history with this person.

You meet and you expel whatever carry-over energies needed to be manifest from that other lifetime encounter. Then you quite often go your separate ways.

Even true soulmates, people whose souls set out from the ALL CREATOR at the same time or with a common purpose, do not serve the same function in each others life each time. Sometimes we are lovers, other times we are enemies, sometimes the child, sometimes the parent. This is cosmic balance at its finest and most complicated.

I had a man that I thought was my soulmate, I knew his name, heritage, location...everything. I met him and it was a total disaster. But, after that expectation was removed, I stopped looking for a set thing.

It was then that the universe sent me exactly who I needed in my life, he is perfect for me in all the ways that I would never have noticed if I was tsill carrying a torch for the unknown fantasy man.

We have since discovered that we lived at least 4 other lives together and are now engaged to be married.

Let your expectations dissolve, open yourself to the knowing, loving nature of the universe and live your life...you will be amazed at what you find when your aren't looking.

Blessings,

[Kaspian]

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

I guess my next step is to get a pychic reading to get a professional's opinion about it.

So you're going to run from psychic to psychic until someone tells you what you want to hear? Seems like you've already heard from two who told you the same thing; you just don't like their answers. In this thread in general, you seem to resist hearing the advice people have given you if it doesn't fit what you think you want.

Although I believe in the value in getting someone else's perspective and advice when I'm struggling, I don't give them or what they say that much authority over me. Stop looking for signs outside yourself. Instead, quiet your mind, take a slow deep breath, and ask yourself—your subconscious mind, your body, your higher self—they all know; you just need to be willing to hear what they have to say.

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

How do you live alone happily yet still want more,what does the universe respond to then?

Alone, I am whole and complete. In a relationship, I am also whole and complete. I don't need the guy to complete me. You can know you'd like to be in a relationship without letting it turn into a desperate want that controls your life. When you desperately need someone, you attract someone who wants to be desperately needed or will use your need to control or manipulate you.

Be your fabulous self alone. Develop your interests, grow as a person, find who you are, and then when you encounter some great guy who you really click with, he'll be more likely to be someone who is good to you and good for you.

[wolfgang]

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

Isnt the concept of "soulmates" a matter of belief though? Obviously some believe in it 100%,others believe it cant be possible since your soul lives many lives,,yet others believe there is no such thing at all!

I like your posts for some reason. I think many people we encounter are soulmates. As far as ending up with someone to be intimate with, maybe that's just a repeat meeting from another lifetime. Then, some of those encounters may not even work because this lifetime isn't going to work at that level for a particular soulmate. I'm just speculating how to form a belief about this. Say this guy is your soulmate, then that could mean you've been with him before and that's what drives all the signs or your seeding of signs - that you recognize his pull for you in this life. But that doesn't mean this lifetime is going to work out. I like to think there are many possible soulmates floating around in our lives. Some we've been with in the past or tried to be with and then we recognize them now. Then it's a matter for timing for one of those possibles to pan out.

I guess my next step is to get a pychic reading to get a professional's opinion about it. But then there will always be other pychics who would say something different! lol I feel like a ping pong ball,bouncing from one corner to another,never sure what to believe in anymore. I have always had a tendency to believe in miracles,magic,faith,signs,all that cool "unseen" stuff...so it is really depressing for me to consider that this stuff isnt real.

You already see how that would go - don't do too much of that, right? you can get addicted to readings you know?

I want to feel like something is MEANT for me and is going to happen. But i suppose that's taking the easy way out. I just cant help but want that magical moment where i meet "the one" and i want to know that it's coming before i get there.

Magical moments, sure, why not. However, knowing before hand would take away from the magic. All the sparks I've felt from someone, was not from knowing ahead of time. And that magical moment is mutual physical chemistry, I think. You both ketch each other's gaze and feel a jitter.

I guess i don't like uncertainty and thats a big no no right? lol I want to know that something that i want is coming,i dont want to live HOPING i get it but not really knowing for sure if i will. I guess its from living so long like that,that i cant trust in it anymore. Every time i see signs about a certain guy,i beleive in them,and i beleive i will be with him,and then i inevitably waste years of my life on waiting for this to happen when it never does. Ugh i hate how i really believe in things and then they dont work!

Radically all beliefs are a form of attachment. Attachment is suffering. So then that's my belief (he he) that all beliefs lead to suffering. I'm still working that idea out.

This is why i got so upset this time,because i believed in this more than anything before. I guess i'll just work on myself and forget about relationships,even though by doing that,i feel like the universe will see that i'm happy alone and that isnt what i want. How do you live alone happily yet still want more,what does the universe respond to then? Ugh you'd think i would have this figured out by now,but i feel like i'm going in circles here LOL I'm sure you all are ready to slap me right off these boards LOL

So you built of a belief which was an attachment to a certain thing panning out, and then it didn't. I would venture to say living alone and finding love in whatever sphere you have is how it works. Find love for yourself and expand it and it will start to touch others and be a vibe that opens doors to the possible soulmates that you haven't met yet. You won't be living in a feeling of lack or sending a vibe of wanting more, but a vibe of "look how cool this feeling is, it would be cool to expand it and include some others". Does that make any sense? btw, I doubt anybody is thinking you need to be slapped off these boards. Probably the opposite. You are very welcomed here, it seems to me. What you write about is a struggle that we all face, and your ability to state how some of these 'new agey' or 'IM' ideas don't seem to really work helps others see how to put these ideas together better. Right everyone reading this?

[wolfgang]

Originally Posted by danas

hello Rockchick26.
Seeing names in places is so common when Im thinking about someone.
its basic IM. but it doesnt mean "here - this is a sign that he is the love of your life" but rather "here is a reflection of your thoughts, the universe is miroring"

Big dittos from my experience. I have seeded many a dream from idle day dreams that were signs of my clinging to something coming about that I thought I wanted. Now of coarse you can step back and wonder why it is that you spend time thinking and dreaming of a certain person. That's were the question is. Not wondering why the dreams aren't coming about but why it is you seeded those dreams. What does it say about how you are operating to get into seeing these as signs or why are you doing that to yourself.

I would advise you not waste your time trying to interpert signs. All they mean is: here are your thoughts- made physical.

There is a possible interpretation that you can do, but it's not about trying to understand why the dreams haven't unfolded but why your thoughts are running this certain way (that has caused the "signs"). The reflection is pretty strong and the reflection is there to show you how your inner world is running.

[mncz]

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

What i would like to know is,if you get signs from the universe that this person is your soulmate,can those signs be wrong? Or am i just interpreting them the wrong way? Here's what was happening,that i was putting my total faith in being true; I barely knew who this guy was when i had a dream about him,and in the dream we were at a wedding,dancing and kissing.

Rockchick, I have been right there myself. I have had some very vivid dreams about me being in relationship with people that I either work with or barely know from somewhere. At first, I was stunned. I thought: oh crap, this has to mean something. Especially because I have had dreams that come true later on. But there never turned out to be any real life events after these dreams.

I also once met a person and knew spot-on that we are soulmates. That led me straight to romancing him, and he was entirely baffled (that was a very, very silly situation). He turned out to be my soulmate, but in an entirely different way - through him I learned a lot, but there was never even the slightest intimacy involved in our relationship.

From these mistakes I learned that I should never "expect" any relationship to happen. I should not look for it or be impatient or frustrated about it or want it to advance faster than its natural course. While there is a certain predetermination in our lives, every living human has his/her free will and that can change the actual life events greatly, and any amount of pressure from my side can alter this very gentle equilibrium for entirely different results.

And of course, I have also learned that, to receive something you want, you have to quite precisely know what it is you want first... and then completely allow it to happen in its own time and course. Not easy, not for me yet

Best wishes and love.

[Angela]

I had a recurring dream that I bore Jerry Seinfeld's illegitimate conjoined twins, and they each had a hole in their back. I stored them in the hall closet, and then forgot about them. I woke up freaked out each time I dreamed this, because clearly it was a sign of some sort. Still not sure what.

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by Angela

I had a recurring dream that I bore Jerry Seinfeld's illegitimate conjoined twins, and they each had a hole in their back. I stored them in the hall closet, and then forgot about them. I woke up freaked out each time I dreamed this, because clearly it was a sign of some sort. Still not sure what.

That was a RECURRING dream!? OMG that is so wacked! I have Freud's Interpretation of Dreams but i havent read it yet,i'd really love to interpret that one! Crazy!

[Angela]

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

That was a RECURRING dream!? OMG that is so wacked! I have Freud's Interpretation of Dreams but i havent read it yet,i'd really love to interpret that one! Crazy!

It's a SIGN. A psychic even confirmed it. I am predestined to break up Jerry Seinfeld's marriage, expose the "holes" in his soon-to-be-ex-wife's "hidden vegetable" theory*, and bear his conjoined twins. I am ritually clearing out my hall closet in preparation for this sacred event. I must heed the SIGNS.

*I only figured out this part of the prophecy some time later.

[danas]

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

. Well anyway this was all before i met him about 2 weeks ago,and when i met him,he pretty much seemed like he was trying to avoid my group and seemed irritated that we wanted to talk to him and then within a few seconds he turned around and walked away. Now that i know i cant attract HIM,why was i having these dreams/visions/signs??? If they are meaningless,then how can i trust anything anymore?

to me that sounds like hes not interested

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

Because i can't focus on a relationship with someone i dont know! I can't imagine being with anyone that i have never seen or met or heard,its the same concept as wanting a relationship...i only want one WHEN I know the person that i want one with. It's hard for me to imagine any vision of what i want without having someone to put into my vision. What do other people do? Imagine life with a nameless,faceless person as your partner? I cant even get excited about that,i have no desire for something if i don't know what it is first.



Well,actually,he doesnt know me,so how can it be a fact that he isnt interested in being with me?

Do you really want a relationship?
WHY do you want one?
Is their a higher reason?( i.e not just someone tobe with so that you are not alone)
What are you willing to let go of for you to be in a relationship?
Are you willing to let go of a fantasy man for a real one?
If the answer to that is yes- what do you like about this guy so much?
is it that hes attractive and intellegent? great then just write it down: I am in a relationship with an inteligent man whom I find very attractive.
Focus on characteristics instead of a person.
And lets say it is him:

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

That night i had a dream that i was supposed to give him my phone number but i was too shy so i went into another room

why dont you get in touch with reality? Just make a move at this guy instead of staying in your mind- ask him out!
its a win win- if hes says yes- great, if he says no at least you will make room for something REAL.

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by danas

to me that sounds like hes not interested

Well,he didnt even know any of us,we were just a big group of fans standing there. He couldn't be not interested in me when he didn't know me. I'm not saying he IS though,just saying,who is interested in somebody when they are one out of 10 people in a group that you are just walking by?

Do you really want a relationship?
WHY do you want one?

Of course I do. I want one because i want to give and receive love and share my life with someone,same reason anybody else wants one (excluding immature reasons)

Is their a higher reason?( i.e not just someone tobe with so that you are not alone)

I have been alone for 33 years of my life,i don't NEED a relationship. I love being alone sometimes. And when i don't love being alone,i still don't date just anybody just to have someone. I learned that lesson from my first boyfriend,that it's better to be alone than unhappy.

What are you willing to let go of for you to be in a relationship?

I don't get this question. Why do you have to let go of anything? Do you mean would i be willing to quit my job or move away from my family? It depends on how much i like someone i'm with,i guess.

Are you willing to let go of a fantasy man for a real one?

If i was with him,i wouldn't need the fantasy because i'd have the real thing! If i am with someone else,it's hard to say because the reason i have the fantasy is because that is what i want. So if i get something else,naturally i'm going to still fantasize about what i want. Unless the other guy turns out to be better,of course.

If the answer to that is yes- what do you like about this guy so much?

Thats why i feel like there is something different going on here...he doesn't have anything that other guys wouldn't have,there his just SOMETHING about this one! I can't put my finger on it. When i look into his eyes something just happens inside me and i can't explain it. I wish i knew why.

is it that hes attractive and intellegent?

Well,to ME,he's the most beautiful person i've ever seen. And I dont know how intelligent he is,as far as IQ or common sense,but when he talks,he comes across as someone who is on my level as far as that goes. He reminds me of myself,i feel like we would totally relate to each other. Aww im getting all mushy now...

Focus on characteristics instead of a person.

Well,like i said,i can find tons of guys who have the same characteristics,but for some reason they don't do anything for me. It is just like no other men exist to me. That's why i feel like there is some kind of connection I don't know about (past life thing,soul mate thing,etc) since i can't explain it,that's the only thing i can think of.

why dont you get in touch with reality? Just make a move at this guy instead of staying in your mind- ask him out!
its a win win- if hes says yes- great, if he says no at least you will make room for something REAL.

Well that isn't what you do,when you're a fan of a band and you're all hanging out and everyone's like "i loved the show!" "that new song was awesome!" you can't just pipe in with "will you go on a date with me?" lol I was hoping to be able to talk to him and establish a connection and then have a valid reason for exchanging email addresses or something,so it isn't so stalker-ish LOL I mean,lets face it,if you were a gorgeous rock star who could get any woman you wanted,what would you think if one of your fans just walked up to you and asked you to go on a date and gave her your number? I don't want to give the impression that i'm just after sex. He doesn't date fans anyway. I guess i wasn't thinking about how this was going to play out,i was listening to what the law of attraction said,to just wish for it,and dont worry about the "how" part of it. I guess i thought he would sense this connection and ask for MY number first LOL

[Phantom of Destiny]

Hmmmm well it is true that the law of attraction states that you shouldn't be concerned about HOW your wish comes about, however I would think that there would be certain factors that affect the chances of it happening. For example:

- Does this guy have a girlfriend/ is married?
- Does this guy live in the same city as you OR comes on tour in your area a lot?
- What's his status of popularity? Is he really big with the ladies in general?

It's things like these that may increase or decrease the chances of this happening, because don't forget, though there is the law of attraction there is also logic. (Eg. If someone wishes they'd grow bird wings and fly off into space using the law of attraction, what do you think the chance of that happening is??? Practically impossible, due to pesky logic >.< )

[danas]

Originally Posted by Phantom of Destiny

because don't forget, though there is the law of attraction there is also logic. (Eg. If someone wishes they'd grow bird wings and fly off into space using the law of attraction, what do you think the chance of that happening is??? Practically impossible, due to pesky logic >.< )

I disagree, its logic that will guarentee that the law of attraction wont work. Because logic brings in doubt and if theres doubt, then LOA wont work.
If 400 years ago someone would say they wanted to build a flying machine that will bring them to another continent in the same day, people would say- sorry-thats not logical. but today everyone can fly (even very cheaply) in an airplane. If a very poor kid says he wants to be a millionare, of course he can but thats not so "logical" either. and yes I believe if humans had no doubt they could fly, but its our doubt from past experience that brings up the barrier.
I think the LOA can work on anything as long as its up to you (a big house, a beautiful loving spouse, a sucsessful career), the minute you become too specific it becomes problamatic, bacause everyone has free choice.
Like: I want to live in that house- sorry but its not for sale- but theres another big house out there for you.
If you want to meet a rockstar you probably will, if you want them to fall in love with you- then you are denying them free choice.

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by danas

I disagree, its logic that will guarentee that the law of attraction wont work. Because logic brings in doubt and if theres doubt, then LOA wont work.
If 400 years ago someone would say they wanted to build a flying machine that will bring them to another continent in the same day, people would say- sorry-thats not logical. but today everyone can fly (even very cheaply) in an airplane. If a very poor kid says he wants to be a millionare, of course he can but thats not so "logical" either. and yes I believe if humans had no doubt they could fly, but its our doubt from past experience that brings up the barrier.
I think the LOA can work on anything as long as its up to you (a big house, a beautiful loving spouse, a sucsessful career), the minute you become too specific it becomes problamatic, bacause everyone has free choice.
Like: I want to live in that house- sorry but its not for sale- but theres another big house out there for you.
If you want to meet a rockstar you probably will, if you want them to fall in love with you- then you are denying them free choice.

That is why i originally doubted this to begin with,because you can't use the law of attraction to control other people,period. But then what about the situations where you wish for your relationship to get better and suddenly your partner starts acting different,and starts "miraculously" changing,just how you wanted? That is a form of "control" then,just like wishing someone to fall in love with you. I don't think you are controlling them at all though,i think after using IM that the universe goes to work on them and they want to change. I realize i am contradicting what i've been saying lately about the LoA,because i have a hard time believing in it now yet i'm still defending it when it comes to my situation...like i said in another post,deep down i never give up entirely on anything,i always have that 1% of hope somewhere that never dies!

[Tigerlilly]

Originally Posted by danas

I think the LOA can work on anything as long as its up to you (a big house, a beautiful loving spouse, a sucsessful career), the minute you become too specific it becomes problamatic, bacause everyone has free choice.
Like: I want to live in that house- sorry but its not for sale- but theres another big house out there for you.
If you want to meet a rockstar you probably will, if you want them to fall in love with you- then you are denying them free choice.

But looking at the big picture, nothing is ever just up to you, none of our dreams flower in a vacuum, all depend on others to participate one way or the other, knowingly or unknowingly.

If I want to get even so much as a cheap offer on flower bulbs, someone's got to put them up on offer. It doesn't matter if it's a big wish or a tiny one, each time the whole universe has got to work together to make it happen.

And whatever you focus on, when it happens, it changes the world for everybody else as well, in tiny or big ways. Actually it's mind boggling to think about it, it makes me think, no one is going to sprout wings and fly until the majority of people is ready to watch him do so.

And you can want someone to love you, I don't think it's wise to cut down the very wish itself. All you need to realize is that there's free choice for everybody and that it might not happen.

And that you can have the essence of the experience you long for more easily if you give the Universe more leeway to supply it.

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by Phantom of Destiny

Hmmmm well it is true that the law of attraction states that you shouldn't be concerned about HOW your wish comes about, however I would think that there would be certain factors that affect the chances of it happening. For example:

- Does this guy have a girlfriend/ is married?
- Does this guy live in the same city as you OR comes on tour in your area a lot?
- What's his status of popularity? Is he really big with the ladies in general?

He is single and not in a relationship. No he lives in CA and i live in MN which is another reason why i don't want to just "ask him out" cuz then i would be expected to know how that is going to work LOL As for your last question,a ton of girls like him but like i said before,they're all just fans to him,and most of them are teenagers so they're out of the question anyway. As far as i know (according to good sources) he isnt into groupies or meaningless flings either.

It's things like these that may increase or decrease the chances of this happening, because don't forget, though there is the law of attraction there is also logic. (Eg. If someone wishes they'd grow bird wings and fly off into space using the law of attraction, what do you think the chance of that happening is??? Practically impossible, due to pesky logic >.< )

I totally understand. But being that he's single and looking for the same thing i am,and is a lot like me,i figured the odds are not completely off the scale. i mean,it IS possible,just unlikely. But,when i want something bad enough,i always have at least 1% hope that it will work.

[iamstillness]

Dear RockChick26,

I did not intend to join this forum and make posts but somehow came to this thread. I feel a strong urge to reply to your post, as you remind me a lot of myself one year ago.

You have a strong urge to unite with your SoulMate and have been seeing/feeling him in dreams and visions. Yes this is your SoulMate you have been feeling. What is needed is to shift your perception of reality and of what a SoulMate is.

The way I have come to understand it/experience it is that your SoulMate is not a specific physical person to be "found" in the physical dimension (also known as the realm of illusion). Your SoulMate is a part of you, is inside of you, always has been and always will be. You are beginning to connect with your SoulMate in the inner realms, and naturally you desire this union on the physical level.

You must release all attachments and expectations and simply open your heart to the presence of your SoulMate within you. Looking for your SoulMate with the ego mind, you will never see him or her. It is only when you begin to see through your open heart that you will behold your true SoulMate before you.

What is interesting is that, on the physical level, it does not matter who the vehicle is. A SoulMate relationship can be formed with any person, so long as you open your heart. You do not even need to change partners if you are currently in a relationship. All you need to do is open your heart, and suddenly your SoulMate is there.

If you currently do not have a mate but are feeling drawn to your SoulMate within you... then simply keep loving the presence of them inside you, open your heart to them fully, without fear, and allow the Love to dissolve all limiting beliefs held about Love. God will provide for you the perfect mirror to your heart, a person to become the reflection of your SoulMate.

Just as the physical world here is a reflection of the self and your beliefs, someone whom you are in a relationship with is simply a reflection of the purity/openess of your own heart. If you are living in the world of ego and perceiving your partner through the lens of the ego, then you will have a relationship based on ego. If you open your heart and perceive through it, then the SoulMate appears.

I hope this helps you. Just follow the Love and everything else will fall into place, don't worry about how things currently look on the outside.

I highly suggest the book "Say Yes to Love" which can be found here: SoulMate Love, Opening the Hearts of Humanity (I am not affiliated with this website in any way)

Namaste and God Bless

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by iamstillness

You must release all attachments and expectations and simply open your heart to the presence of your SoulMate within you. Looking for your SoulMate with the ego mind, you will never see him or her. It is only when you begin to see through your open heart that you will behold your true SoulMate before you.

But how do you do that? Are you saying if i open up about this,me and him could have some sort of a "relationship" on another plane? Like we'll start dream sharing or something? lol I guess what i want to know is,what things would happen then,if this were to happen?

If you currently do not have a mate but are feeling drawn to your SoulMate within you... then simply keep loving the presence of them inside you, open your heart to them fully, without fear, and allow the Love to dissolve all limiting beliefs held about Love. God will provide for you the perfect mirror to your heart, a person to become the reflection of your SoulMate.

If i read that right,you mean God will give me someone who is a lot like him,but not him? Ugh i wish i wasn't so stubborn about this because i never like to settle for second best,and nobody will compare to him. If God can prove me wrong,DO IT! lol I'm WAITING!

I hope this helps you. Just follow the Love and everything else will fall into place, don't worry about how things currently look on the outside.

Well thats what i've been doing for the last 2 years almost,following the love LOL I felt like everything was already falling into place. I guess a sure thing is just a big illusion.

Thanks for the book link! I am still in the middle of reading Finding Each Other,as well as about 5 other books

[moonrambler]

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

Ugh i wish i wasn't so stubborn about this because i never like to settle for second best,and nobody will compare to him. If God can prove me wrong,DO IT! lol I'm WAITING!

Let's theorize there really is a wonderful man out there for you, who you'll love like crazy and he will love you back, and you're very compatible with him, and will have a ton of fun together, and a very fulfilling life, and he will make you wonder how you ever could have thought this 'relationship' with this rock star was what you wanted.

How in the world is this ever going to happen if you are certain you would be settling for second best, that nobody will compare to Rock Star, and you're challenging God to prove you're wrong?

Whatever happened to "this, or something better" ?

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by moonrambler

Let's theorize there really is a wonderful man out there for you, who you'll love like crazy and he will love you back, and you're very compatible with him, and will have a ton of fun together, and a very fulfilling life, and he will make you wonder how you ever could have thought this 'relationship' with this rock star was what you wanted.

How in the world is this ever going to happen if you are certain you would be settling for second best, that nobody will compare to Rock Star, and you're challenging God to prove you're wrong?

Whatever happened to "this, or something better" ?

Its hard to think there is anything better when you want something so badly. It doesnt even have to pertain to relationships,you can be talking about a certain car you want,or a certain job. Its just the simple principle that you want a certain thing BECAUSE of what it is,you dont want something different or even similar. And it's also hard to get to that point of wanting something this bad,i mean this is 2 years in the making,its just hard to change what i want when i've built it up this much. I've always been like this,even in high school,the guy i had a crush on,i liked him for 5 years,even after i graduated! It was only when he was killed in a car accident that i was able to let go and start liking other guys.

[Phantom of Destiny]

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

If i read that right,you mean God will give me someone who is a lot like him,but not him? Ugh i wish i wasn't so stubborn about this because i never like to settle for second best,and nobody will compare to him.

lol rockchick I TOTALLY know how you feel...I'm going though almost the exact same thing as you....I don't think it's really fair, I'm totally trying to find a loophole to that XD

Maybe you should try and master lucid dreaming so then you can be in a dream relationship with him. Hey, it may not be real but if you get really good at it, it can seem real.

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by Phantom of Destiny

lol rockchick I TOTALLY know how you feel...I'm going though almost the exact same thing as you....I don't think it's really fair, I'm totally trying to find a loophole to that XD

lol Well good luck to you with finding that loophole and if you are successful,share it with me

Maybe you should try and master lucid dreaming so then you can be in a dream relationship with him. Hey, it may not be real but if you get really good at it, it can seem real.

Yeah i've been into that for almost a year now,i've been somewhat successful but not to the point where i can create the perfect dream. Usually,he's in it,but i dont actually see his face clear as day,its like a regular dream,kinda fuzzy/not put together/scattered,you get the idea. A few times i've had dreams where we were kissing or close to each other but the control element isn't fully there (if it is at all),i have a hard time inducing lucid dreams because that takes a lot of time in bed,i mean you have to keep waking up to record your dreams,you have to get up for a bit and go back to sleep...when i was first practicing it,i was only getting like 5 hours of sleep and i could only handle that for 2 or 3 days. But i know...i'd be somewhat satisfied if i could induce lucid dreams of him every night!!

[iamstillness]

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

But how do you do that? Are you saying if i open up about this,me and him could have some sort of a "relationship" on another plane? Like we'll start dream sharing or something? lol I guess what i want to know is,what things would happen then,if this were to happen?

Hello again friend. Well actually, the one you are seeing in dreams and visions is your SoulMate, but I am not talking about the person that your mind has chosen to represent your SoulMate visually.

Your SoulMate is part of you, and can come to you (or be reflected to you) through any person in the world. You seem to have encountered someone in the physical world that you feel a great deal of Love for. What is happening there is that this person is serving as a mirror for your Love. They are showing you something that is inside of yourself, the Love. The Love you feel when you think of or are around this person, is coming from inside of you, not from the other person.

Please do not take this personally, but your ego is attached to the "mirror", which is getting in the way of Love. I have been there too, and it can be hard to shift your perception and release attachments to the impermanent, but once done you will be free to manifest your true SoulMate relationship in the physical world. First by opening your heart to your SoulMate inside of you (no matter what "body" your mind chooses to represent him as) and then eventually drawing into your life a perfect mirror (person) to share the physical SoulMate union with.

The problem with the "law of attraction" is that usually people are working on manifesting from a very superficial level of consciousness, the ego. This is the place that thinks "I want this, I don't like that, I like this and want things to be just like so". When searching for your SoulMate this is a dead end. The ego will never be truly satisfied with any parter you will have. This is because the ego actually will work to sabotage any real Love in a relationship because it fears annihilation.

If you want to find your SoulMate, look first within yourself. Open your heart and allow the Love to pour from you to them. You must stop looking for Love outside of yourself, for truly every time you have ever felt the feeling of True Love, it came from inside of you, not from any external source.

When your heart is open and you are allowing Love to move outwards to your SoulMate (their presence inside you/on the inner planes) then your heart will automatically draw into your life the perfect mate with which to form a SoulMate relationship with. This is the law of resonance, like attracts like. But understand that any ego beliefs you hold onto will also be reflected in any relationship you will manifest, so you have to work on constantly shifting to perceiving through the heart and not the ego. You are already experiencing this with the situation you've encountered with this man you are infatuated with. He is unavailable to you due to limiting beliefs you hold about Love.

You have to release attachment to the vehicle through which your SoulMate will manifest. Your SoulMate is not a specific person to be found outside of you.

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

If i read that right,you mean God will give me someone who is a lot like him,but not him? Ugh i wish i wasn't so stubborn about this because i never like to settle for second best,and nobody will compare to him. If God can prove me wrong,DO IT! lol I'm WAITING!

There is no second best to the Heart. There is only Love, and your SoulMate. I guarantee you that if you cast off your limiting beliefs about how Love should look and who it should be with, then you will find Love deeper and greater than you ever imagined.

God will give you what you believe in your heart, it is as simple as that. So change yourself and dissolve your limiting beliefs to change the outer circumstances.

Check out this website, you will find a lot of answers there: Things You Need to Know About Twin Flames (TwinFlames are the same thing as SoulMates)

You are on the verge of a profound shift in consciousness, Love is the key.

Namaste

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by iamstillness

Hello again friend. Well actually, the one you are seeing in dreams and visions is your SoulMate, but I am not talking about the person that your mind has chosen to represent your SoulMate visually.

Your SoulMate is part of you, and can come to you (or be reflected to you) through any person in the world. You seem to have encountered someone in the physical world that you feel a great deal of Love for. What is happening there is that this person is serving as a mirror for your Love. They are showing you something that is inside of yourself, the Love. The Love you feel when you think of or are around this person, is coming from inside of you, not from the other person.

Please do not take this personally, but your ego is attached to the "mirror", which is getting in the way of Love. I have been there too, and it can be hard to shift your perception and release attachments to the impermanent, but once done you will be free to manifest your true SoulMate relationship in the physical world. First by opening your heart to your SoulMate inside of you (no matter what "body" your mind chooses to represent him as) and then eventually drawing into your life a perfect mirror (person) to share the physical SoulMate union with.

Ok after reading all this i'm even more confused LOL So you're saying,what i am feeling in regards to this guy is a soulmate thing,but HE isnt my soulmate,he's just the one that was (for some reason) chosen to mirror this back to me? Then why didnt my real soulmate do that instead? I mean,why go through another person for all this,wouldn't it be much more easier and faster if the universe would just show me the right one the first time?

The ego will never be truly satisfied with any parter you will have. This is because the ego actually will work to sabotage any real Love in a relationship because it fears annihilation.

But since most people follow their ego's wants,why wouldn't this destroy all their relationships then? I know people who are truly satisfied with their partners and they are not enlightened people,theyre just your average normal person who has never heard of all this. I just dont get why it happens for them naturally,but for some of us,we have to work at it...i mean using the ego rule you explained.

If you want to find your SoulMate, look first within yourself. Open your heart and allow the Love to pour from you to them. You must stop looking for Love outside of yourself, for truly every time you have ever felt the feeling of True Love, it came from inside of you, not from any external source.

But i DO feel like i am looking within myself! I know i can love,i feel love inside me,long before i even knew who this guy was! I just want to share it with him,i dont need him to make me love,i already know i don't need someone else to make me love. I still feel like i'm doing this right.

When your heart is open and you are allowing Love to move outwards to your SoulMate (their presence inside you/on the inner planes) then your heart will automatically draw into your life the perfect mate with which to form a SoulMate relationship with. This is the law of resonance, like attracts like. But understand that any ego beliefs you hold onto will also be reflected in any relationship you will manifest, so you have to work on constantly shifting to perceiving through the heart and not the ego. You are already experiencing this with the situation you've encountered with this man you are infatuated with. He is unavailable to you due to limiting beliefs you hold about Love.

But up there you said he wasnt my soulmate,he is just reflecting the love i feel inside me,that somebody else will be my soulmate...so,he isnt unavailable to me because i have limiting beliefs about love,he's unavailable because he isn't the one...right? I'm sorry i'm really confused about all this but it just sounds like you were saying 2 different things just now.

Your SoulMate is not a specific person to be found outside of you.

lol NOW i'm REALLY confused! But you said my soulmate will be brought into my life once i get over this guy...now its not even anyone outside of me?

I guarantee you that if you cast off your limiting beliefs about how Love should look and who it should be with, then you will find Love deeper and greater than you ever imagined.

THATS the problem...how can you not have an idea of who you want? Everyone has a preference,a type,and standards. If you open up your mind to be with ANYONE then it just sounds like you're being desperate,you dont care who they are or even if you're attracted to them. So how do you keep an open mind about who you are going to attract when you only like a certain type of person? I've dated guys who weren't my type and it only caused problems and i was never happy with them,so why leave it up to the universe who i get? That feels like an arranged marriage type situation LOL Where's the free will in choosing who you love?

Thanks for the link,i'll check it out!

[JustBe]

I think the process Erin describes in her article about soulmates, opens your heart.

Just write for yourself what you want, then find out what really is important and what is serving only the ego (mind) and what is needed that opens the heart.

Thanx, IamStillness, for writing these posts.

[iamstillness]

Hello Rockchick,

I apologize for confusing you. But then again maybe that means we are on the right track.

Ok after reading all this i'm even more confused LOL So you're saying,what i am feeling in regards to this guy is a soulmate thing,but HE isnt my soulmate,he's just the one that was (for some reason) chosen to mirror this back to me? Then why didnt my real soulmate do that instead? I mean,why go through another person for all this,wouldn't it be much more easier and faster if the universe would just show me the right one the first time?

It's not that he is or is not your SoulMate. What I am trying to help your understand is that the world around you is a reflection of your own self. Just like in a dream, the dream characters in the dream are just extensions of your own consciousness, reflecting different aspects of you.

Your SoulMate is a part of you, you cannot be separate. The SoulMate is not a person to find outside of yourself, but inside yourself.

Picture this. A person is standing in front of a tall mirror. They look in the mirror and think to themselves "goodness that person is a mess! look at those wrinkly and dirty clothes!". The person tries cleaning the mirror with windex and even moving the mirror around, but no matter what they do the person in the mirror still has wrinkled and dirty clothes.

We think it is silly because the image in the mirror is obviously a reflection of the person standing in front of it, but the person does not realize they are looking into a mirror at all. They think there is something wrong with the mirror.

I realize the analogy is a bit flawed but I think you can see what I am getting at.

Likewise if you are in a relationship with someone and you keep thinking to yourself how you would like them to be different, to be your SoulMate, and you keep trying to change them, it will not work. This is because they are a mirror you are standing in front of. You need to change yourself to change the reflection.

In the case of your SoulMate, what needs to be done is to change and shift your heart.

Here is a quote from the uniting TwinFlames website:

"If you are in a relationship where there is a difficult situation -- where you find that your coming together will bring pain to another person -- OR if you think someone is your Twin Flame but he or she is with someone else or for any other reason unavailable – this means that your own heart is not clear.

You are drawing the Twin Flame energy or the desire is being born in you to be with your Twin Flame, but something in you is still holding on to the old or keeping your Twin Flame at a distance."

THATS the problem...how can you not have an idea of who you want? Everyone has a preference,a type,and standards. If you open up your mind to be with ANYONE then it just sounds like you're being desperate,you dont care who they are or even if you're attracted to them. So how do you keep an open mind about who you are going to attract when you only like a certain type of person? I've dated guys who weren't my type and it only caused problems and i was never happy with them,so why leave it up to the universe who i get? That feels like an arranged marriage type situation LOL Where's the free will in choosing who you love?

The only one who has a preference, type and standards is the ego. The only one who thinks they are "desperate" is the ego. The ego is the one who only likes a certain type of person. The "i" (ego) is the one who dated guys who weren't it's type and found reasons to be unhappy.

The ego is not concerned about being able to choose "who" to love, but in what package it comes in. The ego wants to get, not to give.

Do you see it now?

There is no choosing who you Love... there is only choosing to Love. Conditional love is not love, it is ego. True Love does not have limits or conditions. True Love is giving, not getting.

But i DO feel like i am looking within myself! I know i can love,i feel love inside me,long before i even knew who this guy was! I just want to share it with him,i dont need him to make me love,i already know i don't need someone else to make me love. I still feel like i'm doing this right.

If you are feeling Love then you are on the right track. You can share your Love with your SoulMate without having them before you in a body (and this is the key to manifesting them in the physical form). Open your heart to your SoulMate inside you (visualize them if you want) and just pour Love!

All you need to do is feel that Love without thinking, and just surrender to it. Open your heart and feel the presence of your SoulMate there and just allow the Love to flow.

Its hard to think there is anything better when you want something so badly. It doesnt even have to pertain to relationships,you can be talking about a certain car you want,or a certain job. Its just the simple principle that you want a certain thing BECAUSE of what it is,you dont want something different or even similar.

I will add one more thing.

Say you are in a trainstation. There is a train currently in the station that you really want to get on to, and you really really think that you are meant to get on this train and ride it where it takes you. You keep trying to get on it, but the man at the door won't let you get on because you don't have a ticket. You refuse to accept this, and you hold up the train for hours, days, years, trying to get onto this train that you don't have a ticket for, because you are so sure you need to ride it.

Eventually, the train just leaves without you, and maybe it breaks your heart.

You are sitting on a bench in the trainstation totally bummed out that the train you wanted to get on so badly has left.

Suddenly, you notice another train pulling in on the same tracks that the other train just left on.

It's a really nice train and you get a good vibe from it. You approach and a man at the door of one of the train cars says to you "Goodness me! It took us FOREVER to get into this station! There was another train on the tracks that was being held up by something for a long time!"

You look in your hand and to your amazement there is a ticket there, for boarding the train that just pulled into the station. You get on the train and... "happily ever after".

Sometimes we don't really know what is best for us, but our egos can be really stubborn about things and slow down the process of the universe manifesting what is really in our best interest.

Namaste

P.S. you are welcome justbe