"signs" about possible soulmate false?

[Rockchick26]

ugh. I just feel like its a big pointless game now. I mean,it doesnt mean anything. You can make ANY syncronicity happen then,but why? If you cant have this thing you are thinking about,but only are forced to see "signs" of it poking into your life all the time,what fun is that if you know thats all it is? I dont get what the purpose is. I already know what i'm thinking about,why do i need the universe to rub it in my face that i can only think about it,not attract it?

[Kaspian]

Posts and quotes from Erin's blog you might find useful:


On learning to listen to and trust your intuition: Pesky Logic

How to Attract the Relationship of your Dreams

Do you believe in Soul Mates?

Originally Posted by Erin Pavlina

A soul mate doesn’t have to be a life partner, though. Your intended “soul mate” could turn out to just be a very good friend or companion to you in this life. Marriage is a man-made construct and has nothing to do with the energy you’ll share with this special soul.

Now let’s look at things from a much higher perspective. All souls are just part of Source energy. From this perspective, there really cannot be just one soul that completes you or is your soul mate. We are all One.

I think when you feel like you’ve found your soul mate you are simply recognizing another collection of energy that you either had a prearrangement with or remember from the ether or other life times. You will naturally be drawn to them because they are familiar.

The idea of soul mates, of one perfect life partner, is romantic, but from the highest perspective, all souls are part of Source, all consciousness is part of Source, we are all One. But during our time here on Earth you will be drawn to souls you recognize or remember. There may be love, passion, or just friendship and guidance. Take it for what it is and enjoy it.

Can You Use Law of Attraction to Attract a Specific Person Into Your Life?

Originally Posted by Erin Pavlina

When you want someone to do something, that is not law of attraction. When you want something for yourself that you are hoping will come from a specific person that is law of attraction with limits. When you decide that you want a loving relationship and that you are open to receiving it any way the universe wants to bring it to you then that’s law of attraction and being a vibrational match for it.

Because another person is involved and this person has his own intentions you cannot control what he will do, and you cannot ask the universe to force someone to feel a certain way about you.

[moonrambler]

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

ugh. I just feel like its a big pointless game now. I mean,it doesnt mean anything. You can make ANY syncronicity happen then,but why? If you cant have this thing you are thinking about,but only are forced to see "signs" of it poking into your life all the time,what fun is that if you know thats all it is? I dont get what the purpose is. I already know what i'm thinking about,why do i need the universe to rub it in my face that i can only think about it,not attract it?

It is kind of a game, although I don't know if it's all that pointless. I tend to think, when I'm getting a lot of synchronicities, that it's a sign I'm on the right path.

Let's face it -- you can't be in love with this musician because you don't know him. He might actually be just a symbol of what you want in a relationship. If you're getting synchronicities involving him now, it may be a sign you are on the right path to a relationship . . . but that might not be with him. It could be with someone you are much more suited for and would get along with even better and would be much happier with. Wouldn't that be cool?

[moonrambler]

Most users ever online here, today at 9:48 a.m.: 1,111.

Wow, cool number.

[Acting Like Godot]

I want to caveat by saying that I think that occasionally, synchroncities could be "signs" or "guidance".

Theoretically "signs" or "guidance" should appear if your thoughts are focused on asking for signs or guidance, say, about Personal Situation X.

The difficulty would then be distinguishing between a "sign" or "guidance"; or a direct synchronicity that reflects your thoughts about Personal Situation X; as opposed to your specific askings for a "sign" or "guidance".

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by moonrambler

It is kind of a game, although I don't know if it's all that pointless. I tend to think, when I'm getting a lot of synchronicities, that it's a sign I'm on the right path.

EXCEPT for when you're getting signs about a SPECIFIC PERSON? Thats why i dont get it. I get signs about HIM even though i KNOW i cant attract him through the LoA. Even today i had another one,i was taking a shower with my iPod playing over a speaker,and i have a little snippet of his voice on there talking,as one of my "songs",and i have over 900 songs on there...after a song got over,i thought 'i dont hear any song playing,maybe it's him talking' but the song wasnt really over yet,it was just dead space after it,so i clicked forward to the next song and it WAS his voice talking. Out of 900 songs i knew it was going to play his voice.

Let's face it -- you can't be in love with this musician because you don't know him. He might actually be just a symbol of what you want in a relationship. If you're getting synchronicities involving him now, it may be a sign you are on the right path to a relationship . . . but that might not be with him. It could be with someone you are much more suited for and would get along with even better and would be much happier with. Wouldn't that be cool?

yes it would be cool but then why arent the signs generic? Why are they HIS NAME,or HIS VOICE,or a country that HE wants to live in?

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by Acting Like Godot

I want to caveat by saying that I think that occasionally, synchroncities could be "signs" or "guidance".

Theoretically "signs" or "guidance" should appear if your thoughts are focused on asking for signs or guidance, say, about Personal Situation X.

The difficulty would then be distinguishing between a "sign" or "guidance"; or a direct synchronicity that reflects your thoughts about Personal Situation X; as opposed to your specific askings for a "sign" or "guidance".

And the difficulty is also if you should believe in them or not! Since i've been told i CANT attract this guy through LoA,WHY am i getting signs/guidance about HIM specificially? And i see a lot of guys out there who also have what i want in a partner,but those have no interest to me,ONLY THIS GUY for some reason! I am about ready to make an appointment with Erin for a reading about this cuz I just have to know where this is coming from and why LOL I can't believe it's simply a symbol of what i want because i see that in other places too.

[moonrambler]

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

EXCEPT for when you're getting signs about a SPECIFIC PERSON? Thats why i dont get it. I get signs about HIM even though i KNOW i cant attract him through the LoA.

You are getting all this stuff about him because you are thinking about him all the time. Because you want him, desire him, are attached to him, believe he is the one, and so on. That is why you are attracting all of this.

When I was having intense Big Crush on my rock star, I had the same stuff happen all the time. Sometimes there was so much of it, I just had to laugh. Sometimes it was almost spooky.

I never thought it was a sign I was supposed to go out to L.A. and try and make something happen with him, though. It was a reflection of my level of interest in him.

[Tigerlilly]

Originally Posted by Acting Like Godot

I want to caveat by saying that I think that occasionally, synchroncities could be "signs" or "guidance".

Theoretically "signs" or "guidance" should appear if your thoughts are focused on asking for signs or guidance, say, about Personal Situation X.

The difficulty would then be distinguishing between a "sign" or "guidance"; or a direct synchronicity that reflects your thoughts about Personal Situation X; as opposed to your specific askings for a "sign" or "guidance".

That's just how I feel about it as well. How to tell a synchronicity mirroring something or someone back from a sign as something pointing somewhere?

I get "signs" that mirror my internal focus, "signs" that mirror another person's internal focus. And then they're signs which seem to reflect a higher consciousness and can actually point to a certain action or future, and it makes sense if you think about it, cause if these signs reflect the thoughts of a higher consciousness that one would see what lies ahead or has to be done and could use the universe to mirror it back to you.

The difficulty really lies in knowing which is which. And as rules of thumb I guess it may be a good idea to fall back on the theory that you have to ask to receive and so only if you've asked for guidance, support or a look ahead "signs" turning up may reflect either.

Still telling one from another is a challenge.

[danas]

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

ugh. I just feel like its a big pointless game now. I mean,it doesnt mean anything. You can make ANY syncronicity happen then,but why? If you cant have this thing you are thinking about,but only are forced to see "signs" of it poking into your life all the time,what fun is that if you know thats all it is? I dont get what the purpose is. I already know what i'm thinking about,why do i need the universe to rub it in my face that i can only think about it,not attract it?

Dear Rockchick
The point of it is that we are creators! your thoughts, and what you put your energy into- manifests into a reality.
So instead of focusing on some guy who isnt into you, why not focus on what you really want- being in a relationship with a man who loves you and wants to be with you, and who you of course desire too.
Imagine it, write it down, make believe... whatever, but do it often and sooner or later that is what you will manifest into your life.

now you seem to be putting loads of energy into something which isnt what you want (a guy whom isnt interested in being with you)
Imagine you kept bumping into a guy who really liked you but you didnt like him at all- would you also think that you have a heavenly bond with this guy just cause you kept seeing him? that too would just be a result of his thought, but you have free choice if you want to be with him and fulfill his desire

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by danas

instead of focusing on some guy who isnt into you, why not focus on what you really want- being in a relationship with a man who loves you and wants to be with you, and who you of course desire too.

Because i can't focus on a relationship with someone i dont know! I can't imagine being with anyone that i have never seen or met or heard,its the same concept as wanting a relationship...i only want one WHEN I know the person that i want one with. It's hard for me to imagine any vision of what i want without having someone to put into my vision. What do other people do? Imagine life with a nameless,faceless person as your partner? I cant even get excited about that,i have no desire for something if i don't know what it is first.

now you seem to be putting loads of energy into something which isnt what you want (a guy whom isnt interested in being with you)

Well,actually,he doesnt know me,so how can it be a fact that he isnt interested in being with me?

[moonrambler]

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

I can't imagine being with anyone that i have never seen or met or heard,its the same concept as wanting a relationship...i only want one WHEN I know the person that i want one with.

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

Well,actually,he doesnt know me,so how can it be a fact that he isnt interested in being with me?

Interesting how you think you know him, while still realizing he doesn't know you.

YOU DON'T KNOW HIM. You've made up a fantasy about what it would be like to be with him, from all the stuff you've heard about him. It's not at all the same thing.

I know that you will now insist that you actually do know him.

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by moonrambler

Interesting how you think you know him, while still realizing he doesn't know you.

YOU DON'T KNOW HIM. You've made up a fantasy about what it would be like to be with him, from all the stuff you've heard about him. It's not at all the same thing.

I know that you will now insist that you actually do know him.

There are different levels of knowing someone. You can be married to somebody for 20 years and find out they are gay or lesbian. You NEVER truly 100% know anyone. So no,you're right,i CANT know this guy. But i will say i know more about him than most people know about someone when they first start dating them! Why is it so wrong for me to like this guy when millions of people date someone they only saw a picture of? How well does someone know their teenage daughter's new date,not very well at all,yet they let him take her out,unsupervised. My point is,how much do you really HAVE to know someone before you can claim you know them?

[Tigerlilly]

Originally Posted by moonrambler

Interesting how you think you know him, while still realizing he doesn't know you.

YOU DON'T KNOW HIM. You've made up a fantasy about what it would be like to be with him, from all the stuff you've heard about him. It's not at all the same thing.

I know that you will now insist that you actually do know him.

I think rockchick meant "know someone" as in knowing his looks and a rough outline of who this guy is or what he may be like. Even when you focus on a loving relationship you've got an image in your mind, like what that someone would have to look like and the character attributes you value. That's the way it works. You don't focus on a non-descript blob.

I actually don't even see any harm in saying, alright I'll want to be with this specific person and accept whoever he is and all that comes along with this relationship, I take the whole package without checking what's in it for me. If he's a drug addicted alcoholic and makes my life miserable 24/7 I accept that with a happy smile.

Two things might happen, you get what you ask for ...or ...the other soul that's this guy says "no,thank you" and nothing happens. Don't know what would be worse, but you got the choice to ask for whatever you want.

This is not about pointing a gun at some stranger's chest and tell him to love you. If you stay within social boundaries, if you respect the other person and his or her decisions, you can wish for being with whoever you would like to be with.

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by Tigerlilly

I think rockchick meant "know someone" as in knowing his looks and a rough outline of who this guy is or what he may be like. Even when you focus on a loving relationship you've got an image in your mind, like what that someone would have to look like and the character attributes you value. That's the way it works. You don't focus on a non-descript blob.

lmao! I loved that,non descript blob! Thats exactly what i think too,i need a face,a voice helps,and of course knowing ENOUGH about someone,in order to visualize being with them.

I actually don't even see any harm in saying, alright I'll want to be with this specific person and accept whoever he is and all that comes along with this relationship, I take the whole package without checking what's in it for me. If he's a drug addicted alcoholic and makes my life miserable 24/7 I accept that with a happy smile.

I too feel that i would accept him for all his flaws,BUT,i'll still stay level headed enough to say that if its harming me and he isnt willing to work on things,i wouldn't stay. I am not thinking about this as a be all-end all relationship...i am 100% aware that if i DID get it,it might be just to teach me a lesson,that it wasnt meant to be. Which im fully willing to accept. I just want the CHANCE.

Two things might happen, you get what you ask for ...or ...the other soul that's this guy says "no,thank you" and nothing happens. Don't know what would be worse, but you got the choice to ask for whatever you want.

Exactly!

This is not about pointing a gun at some stranger's chest and tell him to love you. If you stay within social boundaries, if you respect the other person and his or her decisions, you can wish for being with whoever you would like to be with.

Well said!

[danas]

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

. Well anyway this was all before i met him about 2 weeks ago,and when i met him,he pretty much seemed like he was trying to avoid my group and seemed irritated that we wanted to talk to him and then within a few seconds he turned around and walked away. Now that i know i cant attract HIM,why was i having these dreams/visions/signs??? If they are meaningless,then how can i trust anything anymore?

to me that sounds like hes not interested

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

Because i can't focus on a relationship with someone i dont know! I can't imagine being with anyone that i have never seen or met or heard,its the same concept as wanting a relationship...i only want one WHEN I know the person that i want one with. It's hard for me to imagine any vision of what i want without having someone to put into my vision. What do other people do? Imagine life with a nameless,faceless person as your partner? I cant even get excited about that,i have no desire for something if i don't know what it is first.



Well,actually,he doesnt know me,so how can it be a fact that he isnt interested in being with me?

Do you really want a relationship?
WHY do you want one?
Is their a higher reason?( i.e not just someone tobe with so that you are not alone)
What are you willing to let go of for you to be in a relationship?
Are you willing to let go of a fantasy man for a real one?
If the answer to that is yes- what do you like about this guy so much?
is it that hes attractive and intellegent? great then just write it down: I am in a relationship with an inteligent man whom I find very attractive.
Focus on characteristics instead of a person.
And lets say it is him:

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

That night i had a dream that i was supposed to give him my phone number but i was too shy so i went into another room

why dont you get in touch with reality? Just make a move at this guy instead of staying in your mind- ask him out!
its a win win- if hes says yes- great, if he says no at least you will make room for something REAL.

[Rockchick26]

Originally Posted by danas

to me that sounds like hes not interested

Well,he didnt even know any of us,we were just a big group of fans standing there. He couldn't be not interested in me when he didn't know me. I'm not saying he IS though,just saying,who is interested in somebody when they are one out of 10 people in a group that you are just walking by?

Do you really want a relationship?
WHY do you want one?

Of course I do. I want one because i want to give and receive love and share my life with someone,same reason anybody else wants one (excluding immature reasons)

Is their a higher reason?( i.e not just someone tobe with so that you are not alone)

I have been alone for 33 years of my life,i don't NEED a relationship. I love being alone sometimes. And when i don't love being alone,i still don't date just anybody just to have someone. I learned that lesson from my first boyfriend,that it's better to be alone than unhappy.

What are you willing to let go of for you to be in a relationship?

I don't get this question. Why do you have to let go of anything? Do you mean would i be willing to quit my job or move away from my family? It depends on how much i like someone i'm with,i guess.

Are you willing to let go of a fantasy man for a real one?

If i was with him,i wouldn't need the fantasy because i'd have the real thing! If i am with someone else,it's hard to say because the reason i have the fantasy is because that is what i want. So if i get something else,naturally i'm going to still fantasize about what i want. Unless the other guy turns out to be better,of course.

If the answer to that is yes- what do you like about this guy so much?

Thats why i feel like there is something different going on here...he doesn't have anything that other guys wouldn't have,there his just SOMETHING about this one! I can't put my finger on it. When i look into his eyes something just happens inside me and i can't explain it. I wish i knew why.

is it that hes attractive and intellegent?

Well,to ME,he's the most beautiful person i've ever seen. And I dont know how intelligent he is,as far as IQ or common sense,but when he talks,he comes across as someone who is on my level as far as that goes. He reminds me of myself,i feel like we would totally relate to each other. Aww im getting all mushy now...

Focus on characteristics instead of a person.

Well,like i said,i can find tons of guys who have the same characteristics,but for some reason they don't do anything for me. It is just like no other men exist to me. That's why i feel like there is some kind of connection I don't know about (past life thing,soul mate thing,etc) since i can't explain it,that's the only thing i can think of.

why dont you get in touch with reality? Just make a move at this guy instead of staying in your mind- ask him out!
its a win win- if hes says yes- great, if he says no at least you will make room for something REAL.

Well that isn't what you do,when you're a fan of a band and you're all hanging out and everyone's like "i loved the show!" "that new song was awesome!" you can't just pipe in with "will you go on a date with me?" lol I was hoping to be able to talk to him and establish a connection and then have a valid reason for exchanging email addresses or something,so it isn't so stalker-ish LOL I mean,lets face it,if you were a gorgeous rock star who could get any woman you wanted,what would you think if one of your fans just walked up to you and asked you to go on a date and gave her your number? I don't want to give the impression that i'm just after sex. He doesn't date fans anyway. I guess i wasn't thinking about how this was going to play out,i was listening to what the law of attraction said,to just wish for it,and dont worry about the "how" part of it. I guess i thought he would sense this connection and ask for MY number first LOL

[Phantom of Destiny]

Hmmmm well it is true that the law of attraction states that you shouldn't be concerned about HOW your wish comes about, however I would think that there would be certain factors that affect the chances of it happening. For example:

- Does this guy have a girlfriend/ is married?
- Does this guy live in the same city as you OR comes on tour in your area a lot?
- What's his status of popularity? Is he really big with the ladies in general?

It's things like these that may increase or decrease the chances of this happening, because don't forget, though there is the law of attraction there is also logic. (Eg. If someone wishes they'd grow bird wings and fly off into space using the law of attraction, what do you think the chance of that happening is??? Practically impossible, due to pesky logic >.< )