How To Find Your Optimal Medium (Blog)

[Erin Pavlina]

Use this thread to discuss the following entry from Erin Pavlina's blog:

How To Find Your Optimal Medium

[Neutral]

Wow, thanks.

I find that figuring out your optimal medium has been like trying to hack into your own source code. Finding your essence.

I've been using a variant of your "logic" and "intuitive" methods and have considered asking my friends.

I've found that asking the right questions is the key to getting the right answers. It just takes time and inspiration

I feel...I'm...just...on...the brink...of...it!

[Tobias Zimpel]

Thanks for the excellent article. I thought I could tell you my story of finding my medium.

I always felt a strong urge to express myself in writing. As a teemager, I dreamed about publishing a book, later I began to fiddle with different homepage projects, but I never got it going. Either I didn't even get it ready for publishing, or it faded away in a matter of days.

So from an intuitive, emotional aspect, I always was attracted to use writing as my medium. But as I never succeeded, doubts came up, and I had to go a little further to get prove for it. So I asked my spirit guides or ancestors ( I'm not quite sure yet...), and they told me to write a book. But I refused, since I have over 15 years of experience with the internet, and that seems to be a better fit in all measures, and is in perfect alignment to the lifestyle I dream about.

When I stumbled about blogging some 2 years ago, I started to dream of my own personal development blog, but as I said before, I couldn't get one started.

It was only some weeks ago that I finally decided to think really bit - and got my own blog finally started. Only then I stumbled about my exact message, and my motivation and enthusiasm took off, taking me to a state that I never thought possible.

My medium - at least for now - is blogging, because it allows me to self-publish my articles and share with the whole world for no charge, while still making some money on the way. And it has a lot of potential for further income generation, as Steve has discussed in all depth in his article on How To Make Money From Your Blog.

The message I found is to help you living your dream. I always felt a strong urge to help change the world for the better, but I never got a clear focus on how exactly I wanted to do that - until I finally helped my girl friend to find and accept her life's purpose and take responsibility for it. Her smile, her joy, made me the happiest guy on planet earth - not because she is my girl friend, but because I could help, because I could make a difference in her life, and though that difference, she will do an even greater difference in the life of others.

So I want to encourage you to search for your message - it is with you from birth on, and waits for you to finally accept it. Then use the techniques that erin presents to find a medium through which to express your message in a way that provides a value to other people. You will find that helping others feels absolutely great, and that sharing your message will fill you with joy and enthusiasm yourself.

[rubelin]

My problem is that I am very clear about my medium but can't figure out my message and that seems to be really holding me back from going anywhere.

I've been sewing since I was 4 years old, it's something that has always been in my life even though I didn't look to it as a career until college. The thing that has become a problem is figuring how to make a viable living with this talent/passion of mine. I worked in the fashion industry for several years and it definitely was not a great fit for my soul, in fact, I left school because I hated the fashion industry, but got pulled back into it because I love the work, just not the jobs that are available there. I know that I love to sew, love textiles and all that involves, but I hate the marketing, selling and all that stuff that is in that industry.

I've has a tiny sewing business for many years, but have no capital to expand and it's very limited creatively, since I can't expand to more designs because I can't afford to have help in making what I already sell. I also have felt horribly guilty for many, many years that what I love to do doesn't contribute much value to humanity. In my life I try to limit consumerism and possesions, yet commerce is intrinsically wrapped up in selling the clothing I make and it seems that our society doesn't value quality and only wants more crap for cheap. I feel bad charging for a quality product but can't afford to donate my life to my business and can't stand the stress of running a business and having to tailor my designs to make the majority happy so I can sell enough to live on

How do I reconcile the thing that I love to do and figure out how it fits into the unknown message I am supposed to be contributing the world and find a way to live off of it?? I am now a single parent and must make an income but I am very close to giving up on having the happy, fulfilled life doing what I love that I've dreamed about and worked towards and just getting a drone job that will pay for the rent and the bills and daycare. I want a reading with Erin so badly but don't have any money to do it. I'm feeling beyond helpless and too stressed to be fully open to whatever my guides are telling me.

[Angela]

Rubelin, just a side comment to you: shelter is one of the most basic of human needs, and clothing is included in that. To be a creator of high-quality shelter that is beautiful and a joy to live in? That is very inspiring to me, and something hugely valuable you provide to the world.

[Rose of Cairo]

Rubelin! Thanks for being here! You're exactly the person I was waiting for!

From what you're saying, you want to contribute making others happy in some way. Imagine how happy someone is when they have nice clothes that make them look sexy and beautiful It's very important! That IS a great value you're creating for others. Really, believe me, I know it because I've always had so much trouble with finding some clothes that would fit my body...

Do you know how many women don't find such clothes? Nowadays clothes are designed for tall, thin women. If you're overweight, or just curvy, or both, you're in trouble! You can buy a few sizes bigger of course, but that looks awful, and hangs on you like a tent. Also, there is more than just the size. Clothes designed for tall, thin women just don't look optimal on small, curvy women. Those would need other forms, different details, and to emphasize other body parts. They need totally different clothes!

I wanted to create clothes for such small, curvy women. Unfortunately I can't sew for my life, I can't even draw what I'd like to do... So I thought some designer should realize my idea. Don't you think this would be interesting? That would be really meaningful and a blessing for so many women. I talked about that with others and they agreed that they would be so thankful to look at themselves in the fitting room mirror and don't feel desperate for a change. And I'm sure they would agree to pay a bit more for such clothes! I would.

You as a small business cannot really compete with industry if you do the same as they do. But your strength is: industry makes clothes for the masses. They have one model of woman and make cheap crap for that model. You'll find the same average t-shirt everywhere. They don't genuinely care for us to look beautiful. So don't do the same. You have to create exceptional clothes for exceptional persons. That's your chance. That's real value. And people will pay you for that. I always wonder why no designer does it, they would make a helluva lot of money that way.

Well, that was just an idea, it's ok if you don't like it of course. But don't give up. Do what you love doing!

There's a great blog about how to make money doing what you love: Inspired Money Maker - How To Make Money Doing What You Love. Paul is very competent and deals with problems related to feeling guilty for charging too much, or explains how to set goals efficiently and achieve financial success. He also wrote a free eBook about how to find one's purpose, that might be interesting for you to find your message.

About finances, you may also check Marc Allen's books. He was broke and is now a multi-millionaire. An interview with Steve is here. He especially wrote a book called The visionary business. Haven't read it yet, but that could be interesting for you! I heard it's excellent.

Good luck! And best wishes. Don't give up, what you're doing is really meaningful.

[rubelin]

Angela, thank you so much for reminding me of that. I think I have a bit of a kink in my think, in that I always feel that I am talking myself into that concept, it doesn't quite flow for me. I'm sure it's past things, like my Yankee mother's voice disapproving of other's spending habits. Of course, that same mother has always been so happy to receive things I've sewn for her so perhaps that is the voice I need to recall more

Rose, thank you for the affirmations and resources, what a bounty of support My specialty is baby/children's clothing though I also love creating costumes and specialty clothing for all ages. Your idea is marvelous and I do know many sewists who do just what you described in their communities. I do know that my creations make a difference for people, I have a hundred customers who love my product, I've just been sewing the same thing for so long that I've come to hate it a little bit

I'm off to read all those great websites!

[RedFoxBot]

rubelin had a thought on the more practicle side of things.
I found a guy once who designed a dragon bag, he makes them out of leather.
He has a blog/website and he sells them on ebay....

It seems that atleast in his case, having good quality products he makes himself....he can sell because he has an advertising outlet (his blog) and a retail outlet (ebay)...

Heres a link to some pictures of the bag, and heres the guys website (russian I think)....he has great skill in his products...
As you can see the website isn't much but between that and ebay...he seems to be doing ok!

Just a thought

Good luck!

[rubelin]

thanx RedFoxBot, but the practical side really isn't my problem, it's the emotional side. I've been selling a product online for 6.5 years and it's done quite well. The problem is that I have been doing it all myself, not having any capital to reinvest enough to expand and hire help, and I have grown to pretty much hate my product. I have a large wholesale order (my first) that is taking months to finish because I can't stand to sew another one. Though I started out passionate about the product, I've been primarily doing it for the money for years and that has sapped all the joy out of it. I don't know how to get investors so that I can expand, because I know that I would enjoy it much more if I wasn't the one sewing hundreds and hundreds of the same freaking thing for years and years, so I am stuck.