spiritually dead?

[september]

The members of the forums here seem like some of the most hopeful and spiritually aware people I've encountered... well... on the Internet! So I thought I'd stop by and see if there was any advice you all could offer me.

For years and years I've been trying to establish some kind of real spiritual connection... praying didn't work. I eventually became an atheist. Attempting to meditate and speak with whomever might speak to me... didn't work. I end up creating conversations with myself, believing that perhaps the words might actually be coming from another source, but in the end, these efforts fizzle off into nothing. I was an avid fan of psipog while it was active, and spent an hour a day for weeks at a time trying to coax my psiwheel around, focusing and unfocusing my vision in attempts to reveal the colors of my aura, and meditating in attempts to clear my mind of crap to achieve these things. I have failed... without fail.

I feel like I'm spiritually dead, but an unflagging flame within my brain makes me want to continue searching. But how can I establish any kind of meaningful connection to lead me in a more fulfilling direction for my life? I'm current a student who feels pretty aimless and depressed. I feel cut off and very unaware. This is with understanding of the principles of subjective reality, openness to the Law of Attraction and definite openness to hearing from any kind of guide or my higher self. That hearing, that concrete evidence would represent for me a real step forward - something I can put my roots into and grow from. I feel so shallow currently, like I'm trying, but my power of doubt seems to overwhelm every time (I'm a philosophy undergrad trained in the analytical tradition, which draws aggressively from sentential and predicate logic and the power of discrimination in reasoning).

I've read through Steve and Erin's articles. Almost all of them. I'm very thorough (though my memory's not perfect). But I still feel empty and overwhelmed. Let me cast out my intention: I intend, with open arms, to bring spiritual help and direction into my life, from whatever direction it presents itself. Obviously, I came here with the intention that I could get some help from this forum, but I want to remain open to it from any direction.

[Erin Pavlina]

Receive. Listen. Stop looking and let your spirituality unfold. Instead of chasing the truth, let it be revealed to you. Don't try to label yourself. Just be. Just experience. Don't try to fit yourself into a model of thinking. Find your own truth through experience.

[Ernie]

Too many people are outside knocking on the door to get in! You are ALREADY IN!

[Lola]

Originally Posted by Erin Pavlina

Find your own truth through experience.

Absolutely.

Be Still.

You can read, research, try-on anything and everything. Ultimately though, if you are Still, your answer will come. It won't be my answer. It may not be like any answer you've ever heard. But it will come.

[Ernie]

It takes both action and contemplation! If we're only still, who are we helping? If we're always active, we'll burn out and really have nothing to give. There must be a balance between the BEING and the DOING, but doing does flow out of being. There is a priority to the matrix.

[Lola]

Originally Posted by Ernie

It takes both action and contemplation! If we're only still, who are we helping? If we're always active, we'll burn out and really have nothing to give. There must be a balance between the BEING and the DOING, but doing does flow out of being. There is a priority to the matrix.

True, but I got the sense from the OP that s/he's still in the process of defining BEING. In my personal experience that part came first. DOING prior to achieving a clear understanding of my truth, my BEING, would have served only to inflate my ego. I'm not advocating getting still and staying that way always and forever.

[gforceforever]

September, you reminded me of ME when I was going through the "who am I, and what am I doing here?" phase of life. I can assure you, you are not alone in your thoughts, fears, and doubts.

One thing I want to impress upon you the most is that YOU are the key to your own spirituality. YOU HAVE A SPIRIT; you may choose to accept this and begin to enjoy discovering the many facets of your personality and uniqueness, or you may simply choose to attend to daily life experiences and forego the innermost workings of your psyche.

Either way, you have things to learn in this life. We all have free will, so we can decide for ourselves which path we take and how we will travel. Some of us get impatient, and we want to see as much as possible while we are capable, so you may read a lot about those of us who wish to astrally project, in order to discover the "secrets" of our universes.

I believe you are on the cusp of something big, because you already question your purpose and consciously choose to seek knowledge. I commend anyone at any age/stage of life that wishes to discover their connectedness to everything else.

[estrella]

Originally Posted by Lola

True, but I got the sense from the OP that s/he's still in the process of defining BEING. In my personal experience that part came first. DOING prior to achieving a clear understanding of my truth, my BEING, would have served only to inflate my ego. I'm not advocating getting still and staying that way always and forever.

NIce. I know this. From somewhere. Thank you - to show me that some of "these" are here, too.
(I read your other post, too.)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Erin Pavlina View Post
Find your own truth through experience.
Absolutely.

Be Still.

You can read, research, try-on anything and everything. Ultimately though, if you are Still, your answer will come. It won't be my answer. It may not be like any answer you've ever heard. But it will come.
11-23-2007 05:06 PM

[Jennihul]

I'm totally on the same page as the rest here...you are trying to force spirituality and direction into your life.

You have to accept that you are as perfect as you need to be, right now. Forever, really....

Life is an endless exploration...Taste. Many things. If something resonates, study it. If not, leave it. Quit trying to find your niche and don't try so hard to define yourself by your spirituality. You seem to want a label to stick to your lapel. Aimless is the goal, not a reason to be depressed. Exploration is not a failure and spiritually "unlabeled" is not a four letter word.

Jennifer

[Ree]

You've already gotten some incredibly excellent advice! I have only one thing to add: Listen to your intuition.

Don't be afraid to trust and be guided by your intuition. I have always had strong intuitive feelings, but didn't completely trust them until the past few years. I've found that sometimes I am able to make instantaneous decisions about things and I KNOW that I'm making the correct decision. It has not failed me. And looking back, I can recall a couple of incidents where simple intuition definitely saved me from serious difficulty and distress.

The Path really is within us

[belive]

Colossians 2:13 When you were dead in your transgressions and the uncircumcision of your flesh, He made you alive together with Him, having forgiven us all our transgressions

Spiritual death is first separation from God, from the part of our beeing that is God-conscious, spirit-conscious.

Jesus can make you alive if you believe and trust and if you invite him with this a prayer like this:
Lord Jesus, im dead in my sin, i'm spiritually dead but i want to be alive and know you. Please forgive my sins and transgressions and come into my heart. make me live again. I believe you died for my sins and you paid the price to reconcile me with God. Thank you because you love me and you care. amen!

I have done this myself and i hav experienced the love of God and till then i'm living my life with Jesus.

Don't argue, believe as a child and try Jesus and you'll see!
Ephesians 2:5 even when we were dead in our transgressions, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved).

Jesus loves you

[Ace22]

Originally Posted by belive

Colossians 2:13 When you were dead in your transgressions and the uncircumcision of your flesh, He made you alive together with Him, having forgiven us all our transgressions

Spiritual death is first separation from God, from the part of our beeing that is God-conscious, spirit-conscious.

Jesus can make you alive if you believe and trust and if you invite him with this a prayer like this:
Lord Jesus, im dead in my sin, i'm spiritually dead but i want to be alive and know you. Please forgive my sins and transgressions and come into my heart. make me live again. I believe you died for my sins and you paid the price to reconcile me with God. Thank you because you love me and you care. amen!

I have done this myself and i hav experienced the love of God and till then i'm living my life with Jesus.

Don't argue, believe as a child and try Jesus and you'll see!
Ephesians 2:5 even when we were dead in our transgressions, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved).

Jesus loves you

AMEN to THIS.

[Mynder]

You cannot "think" spirituality. You can analyze, think, create thought-models of how the universe works, and indeed all this is necessary to find your own personal path to spirituality, but what you're doing with all that is simply creating a map in your mind.

An image of "this is how I think it is".

What you cannot force (trust me, I've tried myself, just as you are trying now) is feeling it, experiencing it. Trying to force this is only going to push you further away from getting to where you want to be. Let it go. It will develop in the proper way at the proper time.

Remember one thing: your "higher self" is YOU. Listen for the answers inside you. Listen to your intuition. Relax (important!) - remember, this cannot be forced. You were always, are right now, and will always be connected to your own non-physical spirit (what is generally called the soul). If you try so hard to see something, you may well overlook synchronicities or "hunches" that would guide you in the right direction.

For me, once I let go of the "need", things improved. Step by step. You may not be "ready" for a "full awakening" (it takes work...work on yourself). But you will receive guidance for the next step to take.

Maybe you meet somebody who opens your eyes to certain things (happened to me). Maybe you stumble across a book in a store that feels out of place (happened to me, too). All this can be very pronounced or very faint, depending on how accepting you are and how "ready" for the next "lesson".

Love yourself. Accept yourself. You are already a wonderful and perfect creation. Look into the mirror and say this ten times a day if need be. Sounds silly, but I am learning this lesson at this moment. Only coming from love can you truly connect.

[ethereal]

Inviting Jesus into your heart really does work. I've known a lot of Christians who attest to it.

But I think you have to be sincere, and really want it, not to prove to yourself that spirituality is real or that you're really "spiritual" (whatever that means ).

I myself didn't go through Christianity, but through Advaita Vedanta and nonduality. This is actually where being an analytical thinker and having good discrimination is a great advantage. Check out Franklin Merrell-Wolff who was not only a mystic but also a philosopher. Check out his book (partial) here, it is really good

The sages of Advaita Vedanta also layed out a systematic philosophy of Self-Realization that can be very useful for the spiritual search. Here are some good websites:

Shankaracharya

Nisargadatta Maharaj

Ramana Maharshi

A very easy way to have a spiritual experience or awakening is to visit spiritual teachers in retreats or satsang. They transmit a tangible energy field / aura that is conducive to higher spiritual states and awakenings when you are there. That aura is also reachable through books and tapes but is most powerful in person. Meeting teachers in person is perhaps the best, easiest, fastest, and most powerful way to speed up your spiritual path, especially if you haven't had an awakening yet. After you've had an awakening you can meditate at home and progress, but if you don't even know what Truth is yet, you should go meet as many teachers as you can and stay in their energy field as long as possible.

[PurePhoenix]

At the very worst, your soul will be in deep slumber.
Not dead. Instead of trying to find your soul, try awakening it.

[SpiritualZen]

I agree with Erin, "Find your own truth through experience." No matter how much I prayed (although it was a very significant part) nothing happened until I took action. Action based on spiritual principles - helping others, learning to accept the consequences of being myself, self-love, gratitude... It has been the experiences that has brought me to a spiritual awareness.