What makes you happy?

[stephencp]

What makes you happy? Do more of it!
What makes you sad? Stop it!

It's that simple.

For me, teaching someone something that turns on a light for them and makes them say "aha!" makes me happy.

Do repetitive detail work makes sucks the life out of me, so I try to outsource that.

What makes you happy? How can you do more of it?

Stephen
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[tylerlloyd]

That sounds like one of the oldest questions of all time - what makes you happy (i.e. what is happiness?) People have discussed this to death - you will get a lot of meaningless dialectic trying to answer that.

And I don't think it's as simple as stopping what makes you unhappy and doing what makes you happy. Even if the present-you draws a lot of happiness from something now, the five-years-down-the-road-future-you might think "what a waste of time! Why did I ever think that would make me happy?!"

[Shamou]

We all have "persona rules" as to what makes us happy... when those rules are fulfilled we are happy... when not fulfilled... we are not happy...

Personally it used to be, "booze and babes" but that has since changed...
.

[Gene]

Originally Posted by Shamou

We all have "persona rules" as to what makes us happy... when those rules are fulfilled we are happy... when not fulfilled... we are not happy...

Personally it used to be, "booze and babes" but that has since changed...
.

I resemble that remark! I have eliminated the booze from my life and am down to one "babe" who is quite a nice partner.

I found when I had fewer rules I suffered less when life circumstances were less than optimal. I used to have so many of them! One of my tools is evaluating if this or that rule really works for me and deleting the ones that are maladaptive in my life.

[unwiser]

what makes me happy? I dont remember it has been a while.
but i think I get happiness from

achieving proffessional success and feeling accepted, respected, admired or a part of a family, social circle, group or society.

i think thats it.

[Gary]

Happiness is the experience created by your love coming out of you.

For me, teaching someone something that turns on a light for them and makes them say "aha!" makes me happy.

That kind of makes your happiness dependent on other people. It also requires that you get their attention and hold it until you get your point across.

Seems like a pretty conditional approach that puts power over your emotional state in the hands of another.

[Boreas]

Objective intelligence makes me happy.

Also making money. I was surprised to find that out.

However, having lots of possessions makes me unhappy. I am in a mode now to sell most of the things I own.

[Mark Lapierre]

Originally Posted by tylerlloyd

That sounds like one of the oldest questions of all time - what makes you happy (i.e. what is happiness?) People have discussed this to death - you will get a lot of meaningless dialectic trying to answer that.

But you'll also benefit a lot if you ask yourself the question, and answer it truthfully, as Stephen is asking you to do. Unless you don't value happiness, then it's irrelevant.

Originally Posted by tylerlloyd

And I don't think it's as simple as stopping what makes you unhappy and doing what makes you happy. Even if the present-you draws a lot of happiness from something now, the five-years-down-the-road-future-you might think "what a waste of time! Why did I ever think that would make me happy?!"

Does it matter what the future you thinks? If it makes the present you happy it seems the future you has developed some issues which he needs to sort out. Accepting past mistakes, for example.

Originally Posted by Gary

That kind of makes your happiness dependent on other people. It also requires that you get their attention and hold it until you get your point across.

Seems like a pretty conditional approach that puts power over your emotional state in the hands of another.

Perhaps that's true, yet we're a social race and it's quite possible to build beneficial social networks which use the power we place in their hands to help us. Therefore giving power over ourselves to others isn't a bad thing in itself, it's only when we give that power to people who abuse it that we run into trouble.

Originally Posted by Boreas

Objective intelligence makes me happy.

Woo! Also, emotion guided by reason and reason guided by emotion.

Knowing I can have a positive influence on other people makes me happy. Seeing that in effect makes me happier. Learning makes me happy. Realising that I understand something makes me happy. Accepting that I don't, then fixing my misunderstanding also makes me happy.

[Angela]

Originally Posted by stephencp

What makes you happy? How can you do more of it?

What makes me happy? Choosing to be happy.

How can I do more of it? By recognizing when I'm not doing it, accepting that, and then making a new choice to be happy.

Easy as pie!

[MarkusL]

In the beginning i thought it was making money, having alot of friends, having a nice car or getting approval from people but it was wayyyyyyyyyyyyy simpler than that.

for me it is getting a goodnight sleep that makes me reallllllllllly happy. I just love sleeping.

[songwriter]

makes me happy? accepting.... when I'm sad if I accept sadness it turns into happiness... happiness is just... agreeing with how things are... but I don't think agreeing with everything is such a good thing... unhappiness is needed for me, at last...

[Lisa McGregor]

[quote]

Originally Posted by stephencp

What makes you happy? Do more of it!
What makes you sad? Stop it!

The simplist things make me happy. Having lunch outside on a beautiful day with my family. If my husband and son are happy I feel happy and their unhappiness affects me too. Receiving a compliment about a meal I cooked or a job at work well done makes me happy.

Angela is right. You choose happiness. You also choose sadness, but how do you choose not to feel sad when you hear of a young child raped or other situations over which you have no control and which cause such misery.

One question. What's the difference between sadness and depression?

Love
L

[cdn2wheeler]

[quote=Lisa McGregor;112265]

What's the difference between sadness and depression?

Sadness is transitory and triggered most often by external events.

Depression is more long-lasting, changes your body and brain's biochemistry and is almost entirely independent of circumstances.

[Phil Parkinson]

[quote=cdn2wheeler;112299]

Originally Posted by Lisa McGregor

Depression is more long-lasting, changes your body and brain's biochemistry and is almost entirely independent of circumstances.

Are you sure this is correct?

I have bipolar and I know that my depressions are almost always triggered by external events...

In fact... in answer to the original question of this thread... the feeling that I am moving forward in my life each and every day I am alive is what keeps me happy - this may not be the best way to live your life but it has made me successful and it drives me to achieve more.

Phil x

[dayflyer]

Spending time with my dearest and best. My own family, and the one that, "adopted," me. Seeing the sun, (i'm a recovering vampire) the love of friends. Quiet time with my God...(i sincerely hope that this doesn't offend anyone here)

that's the short list...

[cdn2wheeler]

Originally Posted by Phil Parkinson

Are you sure this is correct?

Well, that's what my physician told me, anyway. I did a Masters thesis on the subject as well, though by no means is it the definitive answer.

I think it's a bit like the difference between fright and fear. Fright is generally short-lived and can be brought on my external events. Fear can be brought on by external events as well, but a body's reactions to fear run far deeper than they do with fright.

As an example, let's say that you go to a movie and, on screen, the horrific beast leaps out from behind a curtain. Worse yet if the beast is Paris Hilton. Or maybe you take a ride on a rollercoaster. You'll likely experience fright: sudden increase in heartrate and breathing, pupil dilation, sweaty palms, etc. But soon enough it subsides because, in actual fact, your life is never actually in danger.

Fear, on the other hand, may start with fright. Turbulence in an aircraft always does it to me. But when the influence doesn't go away, such as when you realize that the aircraft you're in is plummeting to the ground at bowel-evacuating speed, the experience is entirely different. Your life is in peril. (Don't ask me how I know this, k?)