Life Without a Vehicle

[MIKEY P]

Thank you all for the advice. It is truly appreciated and I will take it to heart. God bless.

[Liara Covert]

Hi Mikey P,

You may find it uplifting to learn that those people who are perceived as the most successful are also people who have struggled greatly yet made the choice to learn a lot about themselves to get to where they are. At some point, these people decided they wouldn't focus on what they don't have, on what they'd lost, and on what they weren't doing. Instead, they decided to focus on their blessings and find a positive side to everything.

Consider Anthony Robbins who has been discussed in this SP forums. He may be a welathy motivational speaker and CEO of foundations now, but, he was abandoned as a child by his dad, grew up in poverty, became overweight, had low self-esteem, had intermittent jobs and then, decided to change his mindset. Even as he was improving himself, he experienced divorce and had an early business partner steal huge sums of money from him. Yet, Anthony Robbins decided this was going to make him more determined to transform his life for the better. he decided to see himself as a victor and not a victim. He is now happily married and has lived a life that taught him what happiness means. Along the way, he had to learn what happiness wasn't.

It may surprise you to realize famous people have filed for bankrupcy and chose to learn from it. Many saw the experience as incentive to go on to succeed financially and professionally. They also share stories to help others:
Famous Bankruptcies

In a nutshell, its not what happens to you that's important, but how you react to it. You decide if the tests you face will make you stronger, whether they will enable you to get to know the real you and your true passions.

[openeyes]

Originally Posted by MIKEY P

Soon after that personal blow, my business went downhill, I faced alcoholism, depression, bankruptcy, house foreclosure, gained 80 pounds, etc. I am what many on this forum might consider a total loser.

That actually seems like a fairly standard path after divorce/separation, nothing to be ashamed of. At this point if you're extremely low on money, don't even hesitate to use the local soup kitchen if there is one. Plenty of people who aren't homeless but are experiencing hard times use the one in my town, and it helps to be able to cut expenses.

If you're looking for logistics on being carless here are a couple things. First find out about the local bus system. To start you could try simply googling "the name of your town/city" bus, such as san francisco bus, and see what comes up. You're apt to get schedules and routes if there are any nearby.

You're rather lucky that everything is relatively close. I ride my bicycle 5 miles each way to class (I have a car but prefer to minimize the need for it). Having a bike of course makes it easier to move quickly, getting to places in about a fourth the time or less, but I stay less sweaty when I simply walk that distance. To be a little cooler for a low price consider a light colored umbrella (like some long distance hikers use). Of course wear the lightest clothes you can, which if you're wearing a business suit would mean at least taking off your dark jacket and walking with your light dress shirt on.

"To see how much of this heat/color issue was fantasy on my part, and how much was fact, I ran some tests with the Birdiepal and two other dark blue umbrellas. One canopy was left unadorned, one was covered with white cotton fabric, and one was covered with a space blanket. All were lined up in the sun at the same time, and my surmise was proven correct: the plain umbrella was twelve degrees hotter than the sheet-covered one, and fifteen degrees hotter than the space-blanket-covered one. (Temperatures were measured at a point eight inches below the canopy, about where one's head would be.)"

BackpackGearTest.org Review - /reviews/Rain Gear/Umbrellas/Birdiepal Junior Umbrella/Dawn Harkins/Birdiepal Junior Umbrella, Long Term Report

Any cheap light colored umbrella should do (essentially using it as a parasol), and mylar covering would be most effective. Mylar covering is often acquired simply from purchasing a space blanket for a few dollars and attaching it to the top of an umbrella. Just get whatever you're comfortable walking around town with and can afford (there are some excellent ones on amazon for between 9 and 20 dollars, and similar may be available at a local store). A parasol/umbrella should also help protect you from sunburn. Bring a bottle or two of water with you as well.

As for getting groceries and all that, simply make more frequent trips, often grabbing something on the way home from work when possible. Finding out if there's a local bus system should be your top priority. Getting a bicycle would make things much easier, but with the relatively short distances you have to cover walking could do you some good (taking care of the weight issue you mention). Having to give using a motor vehicle could be just what you need to get in shape again, and exercise tends to improve mood.

You may find some useful information from sites such as Carless Living

others can be found via googling carless living or carfree living

Good luck and feel free to let us know how it goes.

[Tuumble]

I haven't driven since the 18th February 1991 because of medical reasons.

I used to drive everywhere and in those early days in affected me badly because it limited me in so many ways but now it doesn't bother me at all - I just deal with it.

However, I think you should look at this as an opportunity. If you are concerned about your health you have a gilt-edged chance to do something about it. Walking is a great exercise and will make a difference very quickly if you are fairly sedantary at the moment.

If your clients see you getting in shape they will compliment you and that will breed confidence and maybe improve your business relationships.

I appreciate your concern about the hot weather so all I can suggest is having a change of clothes and a deodorant to hand before you attend a meeting.

Above all think of reasons you CAN do something rather than reasons you can't and concentrate on what you CAN control rather than what you can't.

[openeyes]

Originally Posted by MIKEY P

we're already getting 100 degree days here, so walking will be no fun, but I guess I won't have much of a choice (there is no bus route from my apartment to my office).

In thinking about it, though it may reach 100 degrees, if you're heading out early morning and coming back late afternoon to evening, it's apt to be closer to 70 or 80 degrees than 100 when you'll need to be walking. You may not even need the umbrella I'd mentioned above, but if the heat seems too unbearable when you try walking it would help. I see that there's no bus route to work, but are there routes for other errands? If everything is within a mile or two of your house you'd likely be better off walking most of the time anyhow, and it may eventually even be faster (at least factoring in time spent waiting).

[Tuumble]

Of course another option would be to see if you can get a lift into town. Offer a service at which you excel for a favour of a lift or may be for a little extra income for a cab.

There is always something you can do but it's not always obvious straightaway.

[Brutha]

My name is Michael. I don't usually post on forums, but I think SP.com is different, so I will try to get some advice here. I hope I don't get flamed too badly.

Then point is seldom to flame people. Sometimes you have to challenge limiting beliefs of a person to help them. Challenging beliefs about someone identify might seem harsh, but it is sometimes necessary.

What I'm looking for is some quick advice on how to live without a car. And perhaps my biggest concern is the professional appearance aspect of it. Like I said, this is sort of a high profile job, and I guess not having a car will lead me to making a very bad first impression on the people I have to deal with.

Quick fixes don't help people. Changing beliefs about identity helps.

Let say you have a friend who is overweight. He comes to you and says:
"I won't stand being overweight anymore. I will do something about it and give up my car. That way every trip will help me losing weight."
How would you thing about that guy?
Would you think: "He is so stupid, he can't people stay at their weight and can't do anything about it."
Or would you congratulaty him for stepping up and facing the challenge with his weight?
You could be that guy who fights against his weight. In six month I would think that people look up to you, because you took the courage to face your challenge and lose your extra weight.
Maybe they will say: I wish I had your will power to take major action on my own challenges.

It is your choice who you want to be in six months. Quick fixes or identity change.
It guess you know the two meanings of the chinese symbol for problem.
The other is opportunity!